by Karen King
There was a tap on the window and they all turned to see a snow-covered Logan peering through. ‘Daddy looks like a snowman!’ Chloe chuckled.
Saffy quickly went to the front door to let him in.
He shook the snow from his jacket and wiped his feet on the mat, then held out the carrier bag. ‘I’ve brought the pump I use to inflate the air beds when we go camping. It should do the trick.’
‘Thanks, Robbie and Chloe have blown them up a bit but they ran out of puff,’ she said as they walked into the lounge.
Suddenly her phone pinged. Was it Duncan saying he was coming down? She glanced at the screen; it was Hannah. She opened the message. Lily’s temperature had dropped, thank goodness, Miles’s ear infection was clearing and if they carried on improving they would be able to come home on Boxing Day. Hannah thanked Saffy again for holding the fort. ‘The twins are almost better and they might all be home on Boxing Day,’ Saffy told the others.
‘Are you going back home then?’ Chloe asked.
‘No, I’m going to spend a couple of days with Hannah and the twins, then go home on Friday.’
To Saffy’s surprise Chloe flung herself at her, wrapping her arms around her waist. ‘I’ll miss you,’ she said.
Wow! She didn’t usually have this effect on kids. Saffy glanced up and saw Logan watching her. For a moment their eyes locked and she felt a frisson of… something.
She patted Chloe’s head gently. ‘I’ll miss you too,’ she said, her eyes still locked with Logan’s. ‘But don’t worry, I’m here for a few days yet.’
Chapter Thirteen
It was still snowing when Saffy got up the next morning. She opened the curtains and gazed at the winter wonderland scene in front of her. True, the snow was still only fine but it was smattered over the ground and trees, making everywhere look really magical. If only it would snow some more and stick. She would love a white Christmas.
She showered, dressed and went downstairs. Logan would be popping in with the turkey today and she didn’t want him to catch her in her polar bear onesie again.
She was eating a slice of toast and marmalade and sipping coffee when Robbie came storming into the kitchen.
‘I can’t believe it! I don’t know how he could do this to me!’ he shouted, brandishing his phone. ‘Two days I’ve been gone. Two days, that’s all it takes for him to wipe me out of his life.’ Robbie sank down at the table and plunged his head in his hands. ‘I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid as to waste four years of my life on That Man.’
Saffy stared at him. ‘What is it? What’s he done?’
Robbie raised his head, red-rimmed eyes glistening in his blanched face. He looked devastated. ‘Well, I checked again to see if Duncan had left me a message. He hasn’t, BTW.’ He swallowed. ‘Then I checked out his FB page and he’d blocked me. I thought, okay, what’s he up to that he doesn’t want me to see?’
Saffy waited anxiously. This didn’t sound good.
‘So I checked in with my other FB account.’
‘You’ve got another account?’
Robbie shot her an incredulous look. ‘Honestly, Saff, everyone has a second account so they can check out what the people who block them are saying about them.’
‘I don’t.’
‘That’s because you’re hardly ever on FB,’ Robbie replied impatiently. ‘Anyway, I checked out his page and he’s completely erased me. All our photos, any reference to me at all, gone. And he’s put a message on there saying that I’ve walked out on him so the Christmas party is off. That’s why everyone was messaging me. And, of course, all our so-called friends have left comments saying how sorry they are, so he’s made me look like the total bad guy.’
Saffy chewed her lip. No wonder Duncan had been so off on the phone. It looked like he was just as hurt as Robbie.
‘It’s only because he’s upset. You’ve walked out on him at Christmas time, Robbie. And he would have to tell everyone the party is off and why wouldn’t he?’
‘Whose side are you on? How come I’m the bad guy all of a sudden, when I proposed to him? I declared my love forever and had it shoved back in my face.’ Robbie sat back, arms folded across his chest, chin jutted out.
She’d upset him now. Maybe she should come clean, let Robbie know she’d spoken to Duncan?
‘He didn’t turn you down. He was put out because…’ She paused. Was she doing the right thing? She didn’t want to make the situation worse – if it could be any worse. Robbie and Duncan weren’t speaking to each other and Robbie was convinced Duncan didn’t love him. She couldn’t let him keep believing that. And she hadn’t promised Duncan she wouldn’t tell Robbie, had she?
Robbie’s eyes narrowed. He unfolded his arms and leaned forward. ‘You’ve spoken to Duncan, haven’t you? You’ve contacted him when I specifically asked you not to?’ he accused.
Saffy held up her hands, palm outwards. ‘Okay, yes I have. Someone has to try and sort this mess out.’
‘So, what did he say?’ Robbie demanded. ‘Why exactly was he so horrified that I proposed to him after four years of living together? Four years when he’d told me day after day that he loved me?’
Saffy drew a deep breath. She had to tell him. He had a right to know. ‘Because he was planning on proposing to you, that’s why. He’s bought you a ring and was going to propose on Christmas Day.’
Robbie’s mouth opened and shut like a fish gasping for air.
‘What. Did. You. Say?’ he stammered, incredulous.
‘Duncan loves you and wants to marry you. He was going to propose to you on Christmas Day,’ Saffy repeated with a smile. ‘So you see it’s all just a big misunderstanding.’
Robbie pushed the chair back, got up and paced around the kitchen. ‘Then why did he let me leave?’ he demanded, turning to face Saffy. ‘And why hasn’t he contacted me to explain?’
‘He’s upset, like you are. You are the one who walked out, remember?’
A conflict of emotions danced across Robbie’s face; surprise, pleasure then disbelief. ‘It doesn’t make sense. If Duncan wants to marry me, why didn’t he accept my proposal?’ he said, shaking his head. ‘You should have seen his face when I proposed. He looked horrified.’
‘Because you spoilt his surprise. Not because he didn’t want to marry you.’
‘You mean he finished with me because I proposed first?’ Was that anger she could hear in his voice? Had she made the situation even worse?
‘He didn’t finish with you, did he? You’re the one who packed your bags and walked out,’ she reminded him.
‘Yes, because of how he acted when I proposed!’
‘You know what Duncan is like. He was planning on proposing to you, but you got in first so I guess he was a little bit miffed.’
‘So miffed that he’s let us break up?’ Robbie shook his head. ‘It’s Christmas tomorrow, our first Christmas apart since we got together. If Duncan really loved me he would have phoned me to explain. I wouldn’t have come down to Cornwall to be with you then. We could have made up, had Christmas together.’ Tears sprang to his eyes. He turned around, ripped off a sheet of tissue from the kitchen roll and blew his nose.
Saffy felt for him. ‘Look, why don’t you go home and sort it out? There might be a train today. Or you could catch a taxi.’
‘Why should I?’ Robbie folded his arms across his chest. ‘No way am I going crawling back. It’s up to him to put this right. Okay yes, I was the one who walked out but he let me think that he didn’t want to marry me just because he wanted to be the one who proposed. That’s a terrible thing to do. I don’t think I want to be with someone who’s got that much pride.’ He levelled his gaze at Saffy. ‘I’m better off without him.’ He walked dejectedly out of the room.
Saffy sighed as she heard Robbie go up the stairs, obviously to his room. It looked like she had no chance of getting Robbie and Duncan back together for Christmas but at least now Robbie knew that Duncan did want to marry him, instead of believ
ing that he didn’t love him. She’d have to try to get them to make up when she returned home.
Robbie remained upstairs all morning. Saffy thought it best to leave him to think things over; she had lots to get on with.
The morning whizzed by and she suddenly noticed that it was gone twelve. Time to prepare lunch. She wanted to practise cooking in the Aga before trusting herself to cook the turkey tomorrow so had bought a couple of pork chops. She turned the dial to heat up the big oven – no good testing the small one if the turkey needed the larger one – peeled some potatoes to roast and prepared some sprouts.
An hour later it was all cooked and she and Robbie were sitting at the table eating it.
‘That was delicious. Thank you,’ said Robbie as he scraped the last bit of potato off his plate. ‘I feel bad that I was upstairs sulking and left you to do it all by yourself.’
‘I don’t mind, I wanted to familiarise myself with the Aga before tomorrow,’ she told him. ‘But feel free to ease your guilt by loading the dishwasher.’
‘Consider it done.’ Robbie pushed his chair back and picked up the plates.
He’d just finished loading it up when the doorbell rang. Oscar barked and ran into the hall.
‘That must be Logan and Chloe with the turkey. Do you mind if I go upstairs? I’m not much company at the moment.’
‘Sure.’ Saffy went to answer the door. ‘Thanks so much,’ she said, taking the huge carrier bag from Logan. ‘Do you want to come in for a coffee or do you have too much to do?’
‘A very quick one would be great, thanks, then we’re off to visit Annie. We always spend a couple of hours with her on Christmas Eve. She spends Christmas Day with her daughter and family,’ he added.
‘That’s lovely.’ Saffy put the kettle on, then opened the carrier bag Logan had just put on the table and took the turkey out. It was huge. Bigger than she’d ever seen before. Still, it needed to be, to feed all the people. She put it in the bottom of the fridge then turned around to see Logan making the coffee.
‘I hope you don’t mind. I often do it for Hannah,’ he said.
‘No, of course not.’ She looked at Chloe, who was sitting by Oscar’s basket stroking him. ‘Would you like a drink, Chloe?’
‘No thanks.’
‘Is there anything you want help with?’ Logan asked. ‘Organising this party is a lot for you at such short notice. I’m happy to do anything I can.’
‘I think we’re okay, thank you. We’re going to get as much as we can prepared this evening,’ she said. ‘To be honest, it’s not so much cooking the meal I’m dreading, it’s entertaining everyone afterwards. Hannah said she and Lee always organised some games, and I’m a bit hopeless at that sort of thing, but I’ve got a few things for the kids to do so hopefully it will all be okay.’
‘I’m sure it will be fine. There’s enough adults to help too, we won’t leave you to deal with it all.’ Logan looked around. ‘Where’s Robbie?’
‘Upstairs.’ She glanced at Chloe, who was still stroking Oscar and quietly told Logan the latest development. ‘I’ve spoken to Duncan and tried to persuade him to come down and patch things up so they can spend Christmas together, but…’ She sighed. ‘They’re both as stubborn as each other.’
‘Look, why don’t you and Robbie come over to mine for a drink tonight? I’ve got mince pies and mulled wine.’
She’d like that. She wasn’t relishing spending another evening with brooding Robbie. Back at home she’d be out partying, she thought wistfully. Well, she’d have to make up for it on New Year’s Eve. ‘Thanks, can I let you know? I’ve still got stuff to get ready.’
‘That’s fine, I don’t go to bed until late. Don’t worry if you can’t make it.’ He smiled at her. ‘I think it’s wonderful that you’ve given up your Christmas to help your sister out and put on a lunch for all us “lonely singles”. I bet you’re usually out partying all over Christmas.’
‘I am,’ she admitted. ‘But I don’t mind. Hannah would do it for me – and it’d be horrible to let everyone down at Christmas,’ she said. ‘Our mum brought us up on her own, I remember how hard it was for her.’
‘It’s not easy being a single parent, and most of us don’t plan it to be that way. Unfortunately, relationships break down. Did your parents’ split really affect you? Is that why you haven’t settled down and had kids yet?’ Logan asked. Then he looked mortified. ‘Gosh, that was a really rude question. I’m sorry.’
The question threw her for a moment. She stared at him, not sure how to answer. ‘It’s fine. I’m not against settling down, it’s just not for me…’ she stammered.
‘A career woman, eh?’
Now he sounded disapproving again. Well, it wasn’t any of his business. ‘I guess you could say that.’
Thankfully the doorbell rang, preventing any further awkwardness. Then a chorus of ‘We Wish You A Merry Christmas’ rang out.
‘Carol singers!’ Chloe shouted, getting up and running to the door, closely followed by Oscar.
Saffy was delighted too. She’d always loved it when the carol singers came around to the house when she was a child; as she’d got older she’d even joined them, but as she now lived in an apartment block she was never visited by carol singers. She and Logan both went to the front door where Chloe and Oscar were already waiting, and Logan grabbed Oscar’s collar and shut him in the kitchen while Saffy opened the door. A group of carol singers were standing on the doorstep – a mix of young children and adults – singing away heartily. When they launched into a rendition of ‘Jingle Bells’, Chloe joined in at the top of her voice. Logan and Saffy exchanged smiles then joined in. Then Robbie came to the door and he sang along too. After ‘Jingle Bells’ came ‘Away in a Manger’, ‘O Little Town of Bethlehem’ and finally another chorus of ‘We Wish You A Merry Christmas’.
It all felt very festive and Saffy, Logan and Robbie gave a generous donation. The carol singers’ faces lit up and they chorused, ‘Thank you so much!’ and ‘Merry Christmas!’ before going on their way.
‘I guess we ought to be going too,’ Logan said. ‘I’ve still got quite a bit to do at home.’
‘Of course. Thanks for all your help,’ Saffy told him.
‘I don’t want to go yet.’ Chloe pouted.
Saffy bent down so that her face was level with Chloe’s. ‘We have lots to do, sweetheart. Remember that Santa is coming tomorrow with your presents.’
Chloe looked thoughtful. ‘Will Santa still leave Lily and Miles’s presents even though they aren’t here?’
‘Sure he will. He knows they’ll be back soon,’ Saffy answered. ‘They’ll have to celebrate Christmas a little later.’
‘That means they’ll have two Christmas. One in Tenerife and one here,’ Logan added. ‘Now come on, poppet. We’ll see Saffy and Robbie tomorrow.’ He took Chloe’s hand in his. ‘See you later.’
As she stood in the doorway watching them both walk off through the fluttering snow, Saffy felt a stirring of a longing that she’d buried five years ago when the consultant had told her she was unlikely to ever have children. The stomach pains she’d suffered from throughout her teenage years had turned out to be endometriosis. By the time it was discovered, one of her ovaries had been destroyed. She’d told herself that she didn’t mind, having children wasn’t the be all and end all; that she had lots of things she wanted to do with her life. Besides, she’d never met anyone she wanted to settle down and raise a family with, so what did it matter? But now, watching Logan and Chloe walking off together, the little girl clutching his hand, and looking up at her father as he spoke to her, Saffy felt a sense of loss. There seemed such love between them. A love she would never know.
Chapter Fourteen
Saffy was beautiful. It was a shame she was going back home at the weekend because he’d really like to get to know her more. There again, maybe it was a good job she wasn’t staying any longer because getting too friendly with Saffy wasn’t a good idea. Chloe already adored
her. Logan had promised himself that he would never get serious with anyone, never let Chloe get to know any of the women in his life because he didn’t want her to get hurt when they eventually walked away. And Saffy would definitely walk away. It was obvious that her career was the most important thing to her, like Jade. So she certainly wouldn’t want to take on another woman’s child.
Saffy was just here for Christmas, a touch of sparkle and fun in their lives and then she’d be gone. Which was a good thing. It didn’t give Chloe time to get too attached.
He’d miss her, though.
‘Daddy, my hands are cold now.’ Chloe was tugging at his sleeve.
‘So are mine, poppet. Let’s go inside, get these wet clothes off and have a mug of hot chocolate, shall we?’
He ran a warm bath for Chloe, with her favourite pink bubbles and then, all cosy in her pyjamas, she sat on the sofa with a mug of hot chocolate and a brownie, watching a cartoon.
Logan poured a drop of brandy in his hot chocolate and sat down beside his daughter, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her close. ‘All right, poppet?’ he asked, kissing her on the forehead.
‘All warm and cosy now.’ She snuggled into him. ‘I’m glad Saffy and Robbie came to do the party tomorrow, Daddy. I like Saffy, she’s really nice. Robbie is too, but he’s a bit sad. It’s a shame to be sad at Christmas.’
‘Yes it is.’ Logan’s mind cast back to their first Christmas in Port Breok. He was feeling rather lonely and out of the scene now he was working mainly from home and was wondering how he was going to make Christmas special for Chloe, who was only a toddler. Then he’d bumped into Hannah and she’d invited him to the Christmas Party and from then on he’d been embraced into the social circle of the village. The LH party was now the highlight of his and Chloe’s Christmas. Some familiar faces showed up every year, Marta and Toni, for a start, but others moved on to relationships during the year and new faces came instead.
