How To Stubbornly Refuse To Make Yourself Miserable About Anything-yes, Anything!

Home > Nonfiction > How To Stubbornly Refuse To Make Yourself Miserable About Anything-yes, Anything! > Page 19
How To Stubbornly Refuse To Make Yourself Miserable About Anything-yes, Anything! Page 19

by Albert Ellis


  h. Wars between religious groups

  i. Scrupulous adherence to religious rules, rites, and taboos

  j. Religious antisexuality and extreme Puritanism

  k. Religious conviction that all pleasure equates with sin

  l. Complete conviction that some deity will heed one’s prayers

  m. Absolute conviction that one has a spirit or soul entirely divorced from one’s material body

  n. Absolute conviction that one’s soul will live forever

  o. Absolute conviction that no kind of superhuman force can possibly exist

  10. Population Irrationalities

  a. Population explosion in many parts of the world

  b. Lack of education in contraceptive methods

  c. Families having more children than they can afford to support

  d. Restrictions on birth control and abortion for those who want to use them

  e. Some nations deliberately fomenting a population explosion

  11. Health Irrationalities

  a. Air pollution

  b. Noise pollution

  c. Drug advertising and promotion

  d. Poor health education

  e. Harmful food additives

  f. Uncontrolled medical costs and resultant poor health facilities

  g. Unnecessary surgical procedures

  h. Avoidance of physicians and dentists by people requiring diagnostic and medical procedures

  i. Neglect of medical research

  12. Acceptance of Unreality

  a. Widespread acceptance and following of silly myths

  b. Widespread acceptance and following of extreme romanticism

  c. Widespread acceptance and following of foolish, inhumane fairy tales

  d. Widespread acceptance and following of unrealistic movies

  e. Widespread acceptance and following of unrealistic radio and TV dramas and serials

  f. Widespread Pollyannaism

  g. Widespread utopianism

  13. Political Irrationalities

  a. Wars

  b. Undeclared wars and cold wars

  c. Civil wars

  d. Political corruption and graft

  e. Foolish election and voting procedures

  f. Political riots

  g. Terrorism

  h. Political persecution and torture

  i. Extreme patriotism

  j. Extreme nationalism

  k. Constant international bickering

  l. Sabotaging of attempts at world collaboration and cooperation

  14. Economic Irrationalities

  a. Ecological waste and pollution

  b. Poor use and development of natural resources

  c. Economic boycotts and wars

  d. Needless employer-employee bickering and strikes

  e. Extreme profiteering

  f. Business bribery, corruption, and theft

  g. Extreme economic status-seeking

  h. Union bribery, corruption, and graft

  i. Misleading and false advertising

  j. Foolish restrictions on business and labor

  k. Inefficiency in business and industry

  l. Addiction to foolish economic customs

  m. Inequitable and ineffectual taxes

  n. Gambling abuses

  o. Foolish consumerism (e.g, expensive funerals, dog funerals, weddings, alcohol consumption, etc.)

  p. Production of shoddy materials

  q. Lack of intelligent consumerism information and control

  r. Inefficiently run welfare systems

  s. Inefficiently run government agencies

  15. Avoidance Irrationalities

  a. Procrastination

  b. Complete avoidance of important things; inertia

  c. Refusal to face important realities

  d. Oversleeping and avoidance of sufficient sleep

  e. Refusal to get sufficient exercise

  f. Lack of thought and preparation for the future

  g. Needless suicide

  16. Dependency Irrationalities

  a. Need for approval and love of others

  b. Need for authority figures to run one’s life

  c. Need for superhuman gods and devils

  d. Need for parents when one has matured chronologically

  e. Need for a helper, guru, or therapist

  f. Need for a hero

  g. Need for magical solutions to problems

  17. Hostility Irrationalities

  a. Condemning people totally because some of their acts appear undesirable or unfair

  b. Demanding that people absolutely must do what one would like them to do and damning them when they don’t

  c. Setting up perfectionistic standards and insisting that people have to follow them

  d. Commanding that justice and fairness must exist in the universe and making oneself quite incensed when they do not

  e. Insisting that hassles and difficulties must not exist and that life turns absolutely awful when they do

  f. Disliking unfortunate conditions and not merely working to overcome or remove them, but over-rebelliously hating the entire system that produced them and the people involved in this system

  g. Remembering past injustices and vindictively feuding against the perpetrators of these injustices forever

  h. Remembering past injustices in gory detail and obsessing about them and their perpetrators forever

  18. Excitement-Seeking Irrationalities

  a. Continuing to gamble compulsively in spite of serious losses

  b. Leading a carousing, playboy or playgirl type of life at the expense of other, more solid enjoyments

  c. Engaging in dangerous sports or pastimes, such as mountain climbing, hunting, or skiing under hazardous conditions

  d. Deliberately having sex without taking contraceptive or venereal disease precautions

  e. Engaging in college hazing or other pranks of a hazardous nature

  f. Turning in false fire alarms

  g. Dangerous forms of dueling

  h. Engaging in stealing or homicide for excitement-seeking

  i. Engaging in serious forms of brawling, fighting, rioting, or warring for excitement-seeking

  j. Engaging in cruel sports, such as clubbing baby seals or cock-fighting for excitement-seeking

  19. Magic-Related Irrationalities

  a. Devout belief in magic, sorcery, witchcraft, etc.

  b. Devout belief in astrology

  c. Devout belief in phrenology

  d. Devout belief in mediums and ghosts

  e. Devout belief in talking horses and other talking animals

  f. Devout belief in extrasensory perception

  g. Devout belief in demons and exorcism

  h. Devout belief in the power of prayer

  i. Devout belief in superhuman entities and gods

  j. Devout belief in damnation and salvation

  k. Devout belief that the universe really cares for humans

  l. Devout belief that some force in the universe spies on humans and regulates their lives on the principle of deservingness and nondeservingness

  m. Devout belief in the unity and union of all things in the world

  n. Devout belief in immortality

  20. Immorality Irrationalities

  a. Engaging in immoral and criminal acts opposed to one’s own strong moral code

  b. Engaging in immoral and criminal acts for which one has a good chance of getting apprehended and severely penalized

  c. Engaging in immoral and criminal acts when one would have a good chance of gaining more with less effort at noncriminal pursuits

  d. Firmly believing that virtually no chance exists of one’s getting caught at immoral and criminal acts when a good chance actually exists

  e. Strong belief that because a good chance exists that one can get away with a single criminal act, a good chance also exists that one can get away with repeated acts of that nature

  f. Stubborn refusal to amend
one’s immoral ways even though one suffers severe penalties for engaging in them

  g. Engaging in criminal, assaultive, or homicidal acts without any real sense of behaving irresponsibly or immorally

  21. Irrationalities Related to Low Frustration Tolerance or Short-Range Hedonism

  a. Strong insistence on going mainly or only for the pleasures of the moment instead of for those of the present and future

  b. Obsession with immediate gratifications, whatever the costs

  c. Whining and strongly pitying oneself when one finds it necessary to surrender short-range pleasures for other gains

  d. Ignoring the dangers inherent in going for immediate pleasures

  e. Striving for ease and comfort rather than for greater satisfactions that require some temporary discomfort

  f. Refusing to work against a harmful addiction because of the immediate discomfort of giving it up

  g. Refusing to continue with a beneficial or satisfying program of activity because one views its onerous aspects as too hard and devoutly believes that they should not exist

  h. Chomping at the bit impatiently when one has to wait for or work for a satisfying condition to occur

  i. Procrastinating about doing activities that one knows would turn out beneficially and that one has promised oneself to do

  j. Significantly contributing to the consumption of a scarce commodity that one knows one will very much want in the future

  22. Defensive Irrationalities

  a. Rationalizing about one’s poor behavior instead of trying to honestly admit it and correct it

  b. Denying that one has behaved poorly or stupidly when one clearly has

  c. Avoiding facing some of one’s serious problems and sweeping them under the rug

  d. Unconsciously repressing some of one’s “shameful” acts because one will savagely condemn oneself if one consciously admits them

  e. Projecting one’s poor behavior onto others and contending that they did it in order to deny responsibility for it

  f. Using the sour grapes mechanism, and claiming that you really do not want something you do want, when you find it too difficult to face your not getting it

  g. Identifying with outstanding individuals and unrealistically believing that you have the same kinds of abilities or talents that they have

  h. Resorting to transference: confusing people who affected you seriously in your past life with those whom you have interests in today and assuming that the present individuals will act pretty much the same way as the past ones did

  i. Resorting to a reaction formation: expressing reverse feelings (such as love) for someone for whom you really have the opposite feelings (such as hate)

  23. Attribution Irrationalities

  a. Attributing to people feelings for you that they really do not have

  b. Attributing certain motives for people’s behavior when they do not actually have those motives

  c. Attributing to people a special interest in you when they have no such interest

  d. Attributing certain characteristics or ideas to people because they have membership in a group whose constituents frequently have such characteristics or ideas

  24. Memory-Related Irrationalities

  a. Forgetting painful experiences soon after they end and not using them to avoid future pain

  b. Embellishing the facts about people’s behavior and inventing exaggerations and rumors about them

  c. Focusing mainly or only on the immediate advantages or disadvantages of things and shortsightedly ignoring what will probably happen in connection with them in the future

  d. Repressing one’s memory of important events so as not to feel responsibility or shame about their occurring

  e. Remembering some things too well and thereby interfering with effective thought and behavior in other respects

  25. Demandingness-Related Irrationalities

  a. Demanding that one must do well at certain goals in order to accept oneself as a human being

  b. Demanding that one must win the approval or love of significant others

  c. Demanding that one must do perfectly well at practically everything and/or win the perfect approval of practically everyone

  d. Demanding that others must treat one fairly, justly, considerately, and lovingly

  e. Demanding that everyone must treat one perfectly fairly, justly, considerately, and lovingly

  f. Demanding that the conditions of life must remain easy and that one must get practically everything one wants quickly, without any undue effort

  g. Demanding that one must have almost perfect enjoyment or ecstasy at all times

  26. Sex-Related Irrationalities

  a. The belief that sex acts have intrinsic dirtiness, badness, or wickedness

  b. The belief that sex acts prove absolutely bad or immoral unless they go with love, marriage, or other nonsexual relationships

  c. The belief that orgasm has a sacred quality and that sex without it has no real joy or legitimacy

  d. The belief that intercourse has a sacred quality and that orgasm must come about during penile-vaginal intromission

  e. The belief that one must have sex competence and that one’s worth as a person doesn’t exist without it

  f. The belief that good sex always must include simultaneous orgasm

  g. The belief that masturbation and petting to orgasm have a shameful quality, not the legitimacy of intercourse

  h. The belief that men can legitimately and morally have more sex or less restricted sex than can women

  i. The belief that sex competence should occur spontaneously and easily, without any kind of knowledge or practice

  j. The belief that women have little natural interest in sex, remain naturally passive, and have inferior sexual abilities and capacities

  k. The belief that two people who love each other can have little or no sexual interest in other individuals

 

‹ Prev