All the air slipped out of Nick’s lungs. “So what ... what are you going to do?”
“I spent a little time today looking up some options, read some forums. There are more gay-friendly law firms out there, for one, and I could even change fields and work for a company that has normal hours – there are some around. Generally downshift, so I have more of a life, though on a smaller salary. If everything else fails, I could get qualified in general health and wellness and massage therapy in a year or two.” He paused, shifting his weight once, then twice. “Maybe you and I can work something out.”
“Such as ...?”
“I’ll stick with law for now,” Spencer said. “While you finish up your studies. Save some money so there’s a good cushion and all, and once you’re on your feet with your career, then I can change mine.”
Nick took a long moment just to comprehend what Spencer was suggesting. He’d pegged the whole thing all wrong. Spencer wasn’t stripping away his independence and caging him in. This was a two-way street. That whole give-and-take thing he’d never really experienced in a relationship.
“I still have a year and half left,” he said. “Before I graduate. And that’s just the start. Work experience, getting chartered. It’ll be years.”
Spencer nodded. “That’d be more than enough time to save some money. If we help each other out on this, we could both be in less miserable careers within, what, five years?”
“You’d be willing to wait that long.” Nick blinked. “Stay with the firm or one like it, hold off on what you want ... until I’m settled into my career?”
“Yes.” Spencer reached for Nick’s hand and slipped his fingers between Nick’s. “We both deserve to be happy, don’t you think?”
I’m just not so sure I deserve a man like you.
Spencer’s thumb traced a slow arc along the side of Nick’s hand. “No one has to make a decision tonight. If you want to think on it, we –”
“I want to.”
Spencer jumped.
Nick took a breath. He clasped Spencer’s hand a little tighter and stepped closer to him. “There’s nothing to think about. I want to.”
Spencer gave a long, relieved sigh. “But if you say yes now and decide differently further down the road that it’s not working, then ...”
“Understood. Things change.” Five years, though. That seemed manageable. He could rent out the studio. It would cover the mortgage payment, possibly yield a little extra. And that way, he’d keep it as an emergency thing, too. If it didn’t work out. “But it’s no reason not to take a little risk.”
“No risk from my point of view. We can keep each other’s backs free. And I’ll be much happier knowing there’s light at the end of the tunnel, too.”
“Same here.” Nick grinned and pulled him closer for a kiss.
Spencer’s shoulders relaxed, and Nick would almost have thought it was a sign that Spencer had given up responsibility – submitted to him, but it now seemed like simple relief.
So much acceptance, levelheadedness and strength, he did envy Spencer those. In this case, though, maybe it was also that Spencer felt accepted; if he felt Nick was on his side, had his back, was on the same page, that gave Spencer the courage to be strong for both of them.
He should have seen it earlier – it was all give and take, one of them building upon the other, a self-supporting structure built on trust, just like any other relationship, whether it involved whips and chains or not. That I love you hadn’t come easily, but now the things they could build on were taking shape. Room in which to develop all the things they could give each other, all the things they could learn about each other.
Spencer met his eyes. “There’s also the guest bedroom. That could be your study. Or if you want your own bed –”
“Now you’re getting ridiculous. If anything, I’ll kick you out of the main bedroom, or you’ll sleep on the floor.”
Spencer gave a short laugh. “Yes, you would.” He paused. “I mean, if that’s what you wanted.”
“The last thing I’d want is to sleep anywhere you aren’t.” Nick reached up and gripped Spencer’s tie right under the knot. Just before he kissed Spencer again, he said, “And don’t you forget it.”
The End
Also by Aleksandr Voinov
Market Garden series
Dark Soul, Volumes I-III
Witches of London – Lars
Witches of London – Eagle’s Shadow, with Jordan Taylor
Witches of London – Shadows Watching, with Jordan Taylor
Burn
Skybound
Gold Digger
Return on Investment (Return on Investment #1), also available in audio
Risk Return (Return on Investment #2)
Nightingale, also available in audio
Deliverance, also available in audio
Incursion (Incursion #1), also available in audio
Exile (Incursion #2)
Dark Edge of Honor, with Rhi Etzweiler
The Lion of Kent, with Kate Cotoner
For a list, go to www.aleksandrvoinov.com/bookshelf.html.
About the Authors
EPIC Award winner and Lambda Award finalist Aleksandr Voinov is an emigrant German author living near London, where he works as an editor in financial services. His genres range from science fiction and fantasy to thriller, historical, contemporary, and erotica. His books were/are published by Random House Germany, Samhain Publishing, and others.
If he isn’t writing, he studies alternative therapies, explores historical sites, and meets other writers. He single-handedly sustains three London bookstores with his ever-changing research projects. His current interests include European magical traditions, the history of chess, military strategies of the crusaders, and the Golden Age of Piracy.
Visit Aleksandr’s website at http://www.aleksandrvoinov.com, his blog at http://www.aleksandrvoinov.blogspot.com, follow him on Twitter, where he tweets as @aleksandrvoinov, and/or subscribe to his newsletter at: http://eepurl.com/71jNz.
L.A. Witt is an abnormal M/M romance writer who has finally been released from the purgatorial corn maze of Omaha, Nebraska, and now spends her time on the southwestern coast of Spain. In between wondering how she didn't lose her mind in Omaha, she explores the country with her husband, several clairvoyant hamsters, and an ever-growing herd of rabid plot bunnies. She also has substantially more time on her hands these days, as she has recruited a small army of mercenaries to search South America for her nemesis, romance author Lauren Gallagher, but don't tell Lauren. And definitely don't tell Lori A. Witt or Ann Gallagher. Neither of those twits can keep their mouths shut...
Website: http://www.gallagherwitt.com
Twitter: @GallagherWitt
Email: [email protected]
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