Wished Away: A Broken Fairy Tale

by S.P. Cervantes

  “You deserve someone like him Jess. Let him have you. All of you.” Cam takes my other hand and we follow the men inside.

  Mr. Dade has a table all set for us in the back room that overlooks the cold Atlantic. Gage is waiting for me in the doorway, with a glass of wine. “Hey there doctor, are you boys done talking shop?”

  Just then Joey comes bursting through the door with a tall blonde I’ve never seen before. He knows how much we don’t like having to spend intimate dinners with one of his random girls, so Cam and I look at each other rolling our eyes before turning back and greeting his date with a polite smile. Kat on the other hand is shooting daggers Joey’s way, and I notice the way he looks back at her, clearly irritated with Kenny’s presence. It’s almost as if the two purposely brought dates that would piss each other off, and now I’m a little pissed that they’re making things awkward.

  “Now that we’re all here, sit all your asses down and let’s get started,” I say trying to break the tension that’s building between Kenny and Joey when he notices the way Joey’s glaring at Kat.

  Gage takes my jacket, and places his hand on my lower back, leaning into my ear. “I like it when you’re sassy,” and kisses my ear before pulling out my chair for me to sit in. My insides ignite imagining all of the things he’ll be saying and doing to me later.

  “So Gage, did you tell everyone the big news?” Joey asks as he pours a large glass of wine for his date who seems clueless to the fact that Kat hasn’t stopped mad-dogging her and leans in and kisses him firmly on the mouth in appreciation. Joey acts as though nothing is happening, keeping eye contact with Gage the entire time.

  I look up at Gage with excitement, remembering he said there was something he wanted to tell me earlier, but am surprised by the sudden sullen change in his expression. He reaches over and takes my hand in his and kisses my palm. “I was actually hoping to talk with Jess about it first…”

  Before he could continue, a clearly inebriated Joey interrupts. “Jess, your man here has been nominated for Chief of Surgery.”

  I look up at Gage with excitement. “That’s cause for celebration if I’ve ever heard one.” I hold up my glass. “To my man,” I say with a wink making Gage finally smile.

  “I like it when you call me that,” he says so only I can hear, and holds up his glass. “It’s just an honor to be nominated,” he says mockingly before looking over to Joey as if telling him to stop just as Joey begins to speak again.

  I can’t figure out why Gage isn’t more excited since medicine is his passion, but soon realize once Joey continues, not paying attention to Gage’s attempt at shutting him down. “Dude, the Cleveland Clinic was named the number one cardiology and heart surgery hospital in the nation. That’s a huge deal.”

  I almost choke on my wine at Joey’s words. Cleveland, Ohio? I turn to see Gage looking at me. “Yes, it’s a huge deal, but it’s not one I’m sure I’m going to be taking. I haven’t had a chance to talk to Jess about it yet and I have the property deal with my parents to consider.”

  “Dude, you’d be a fool to pass this up. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted.” Joey’s words cut me to the core. Just when I open my heart, I feel it start to crack and fight to hide my devastation.

  Gage takes my hand in his and kisses my palm again, his blue eyes piercing my heart. “Correction, Joey. I have everything I’ve ever wanted right here.”

  Cam and Kat both say “Ahhhh,” at the same time and my heart melts a little more. I look back into his glistening eyes and notice the worry I see in his expression. I kiss his cheek. “We will talk later. I’m proud of you, doctor.”

  He smiles and my heart breaks. How can the world be so cruel? Ohio is just not an option for me. If it was only me, I’d follow Gage to the ends of the earth. But I have Charlotte, and she’s lost so much already. I could never tear her away from her grandparents, her friends, her home.

  Throughout dinner I try to do my best to hide my heartbreak and make jokes and laugh along with the others, focusing more on the tension between Joey and Kat than on the man sitting next to me. There’s so much about Gage that I love. Yes love, and now that I finally realize I love him, he could be taken away.

  Gage has this unique quality of endearing all those who he comes in contact with, while having the ability to maintain a stoic confidence that is sexy as hell. The entire dinner, Gage’s attention if firmly on me, and there isn’t a moment where a part of his body isn’t touching mine. When he pulls me into him as he sips on his coffee, discussing some development deal he’s working on for his family’s company, I let myself wonder if I’d always feel this way with Gage, or if he really is just someone that has helped me get over the devastating loss of Dave. But just as soon as the question enters my mind, it’s answered when he entwines his fingers with mine, and brushes my hair from my neck, sending shocks of need through me. He places a gentle kiss on my neck, moving his lips in small circles, not caring who is watching. “I love you, Jessica.”

  It’s as if his words are the words needed to cloud my sadness and I turn in my seat and look at him so that he has no question of my feelings. “I want to spend the rest of this night showing you how much I love you.”

  He bites at his bottom lip, his eyes full of need, but then his face turns soft and he places his hand on my cheek. “We should talk first,” he says turning back into the empathetic doctor, and I want my dominant, sexy boyfriend right now.

  I nod my head in disagreement, and naughty smile curling on my lips. “Not tonight.”

  His deep laugh massages my soul and I’m glad his focus is the same as mine. Joey and the girl whose name I can’t remember leave right when the bill is paid, and Kat and Kenny seem to be in some sort of an argument when Holden asks us if we’re ready to go. We both answer instantly making Cam and Holden both laugh at our eagerness.

  “I’m not even going to ask,” Holden says as he wraps Cam in his arms and kisses her sweetly. “I was going to invite you two back for drinks, but it seems you’d rather have some alone time.”

  Gage smiles down at me, and his expression is filled with so much that I have no doubt how much he wants to be with me right now. “How about a rain check?” he says before leading me out the door.

  It’s a blustering cold night when we get outside, and I wonder what in God’s name Joey is thinking walking home in this as I make a run for the car that seems too far away when the icy cold wind feels like razors slicing across my face. When we get to the car, Gage removes his gloves and places his warm hands on my freezing face.

  I smile up at him. “Is it an innate thing with you?” He looks at me with a questioning expression making me giggle. “Taking care of people.” I take my gloves off and mirror his actions, placing my hands on his frozen face. “When are you going to put yourself first?”

  His smile fades for a moment, but then is replaced with a devious smirk. “Not tonight. Tonight is going to be All. About. You.” The truth in his sensual words make me weak with desire.

  “Hey you two, you realize we can hear you, right?” Kat says sarcastically.

  Holden watches us from the rearview mirror. “I’m loving it. They’re almost as hot as we are Cam,” he says playfully taking the attention off us as he reaches over and pulls Cam in for a kiss.

  “Eyes on the road, playboy. Black ice is everywhere,” Kat yells, clearly perturbed and obviously not feeling the same by the pissed off look on Kenny’s face.

  When Holden pulls up in front of my house, Kat and Kenny can’t say goodbye fast enough and are already fighting their way back to the car. Holden laughs and yells out the window to Gage, “You working tomorrow?”

  Gage shuts the door after stepping out. “No man, three days off in a row this week.”

  “Great. I’ll give you a buzz tomorrow. I’d love to check out the property you guys are taking over.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “And Gage,” Holden looks over at me with a sweet smile that’s so unlike him. “
Thanks for taking care of my girl. She may be a pain in the ass, but she’s got a heart of gold.”

  Big brother Holden.

  Gage pulls me into his arms with a huge smile. “No place I’d rather be, man.”

  When I shut the door behind us, I turn to see Gage is right there, hooded blue eyes aimed right at his prize. I stand frozen, too mesmerized by how absolutely sexy he looks taking off his heavy dark jacket, never breaking his gaze from mine. I made it clear to Gage early on that tonight, I was ready, and now, he’s making it very clear just how ready he is when he stalks slowly towards me, walking with my body so that I’m pressed up against the cool wooden door. I bite down on my bottom lip when he slowly slides my jacket off my shoulders, letting it pool on the floor at our feet, looking as if he’s going to eat me alive and I’m loving every second of it. Anticipation of his touch is building inside me like a volcano about to erupt. I reach out and loop my fingers through his belt buckle, pulling him closer, letting him know how much I want to be with him right now.

  “You mean so much Jess.” His raspy voice washes over me as he leans in and hovers his lips so close, that I can feel his breath mixing with mine. “You make me feel so much more than I ever thought I could feel with just a touch.” He trails his fingers teasingly down the V of my sweater, along my breast, making me shiver. “You mean so much, I just want to drown in you Jess. I want to drown in all of you.”

  “I’m yours Gage. All yours.” The words come easily and the meaning behind them isn’t lost on him. He’s the only thing on my mind right now. “I love you.”

  “Mine.” His mouth crashes against mine causing me to sigh in anticipation. My hands instantly find their way to his hair, and I pull him in deeper, pressing my body up against his. His hands search me, pulling and tugging at the clothes that are in the way of finding the connection we both have waited for and want so badly.

  He unexpectedly pulls back and looks at me suddenly sweeping me up in his arms. He pauses smiles broadly. “I’m going to spend this entire night showing you just how much I cherish you, how much I love you, so that when I’m done with you, you will never doubt that you belong with me.”

  When he opens the door to my room, I smile when I hear the soft sound of music playing, thinking what good luck it is that I’d forgotten to turn it off when I left. “Ink” by Coldplay is filling the air, matching the thoughts left unsaid between us. He places me down in front of my bed and just stands there, looking at me with a sexy-as-hell smile. Taking me by surprise, he reaches out and pulls me close to him and begins moving our bodies together to the beat of the song, while he sings along in a deep sultry voice that has me unhinged. His hands are all over me, driving me insane with need. This song reminds me of our first date on the beach. The perfect first date.

  I can’t wait any longer, I’ve waited too long. I’ve made him wait too long. And when his glistening eyes meet mine leaving me with no question whether he feels the same, I’m undone. “Make love to me, Gage.” I lean up on my toes, not waiting for an answer and pour every ounce of my love for him into my kiss, relishing in the full, soft way they caress my soul.

  A trail of fire creeps up my sides when his hands painfully slowly peel my shirt up off my body, my breath turning frantic with desire when he takes my swelled breasts in his hands and lets out a groan. “My God Jessica, you are so fucking beautiful. So. Beautiful.” His breaths are as frantic as mine when I make quick work of his shirt and am now fumbling with the button of his jeans.

  He nibbles on my bottom lip when he makes work of the button to my jeans and has them hovering just above my waist making me go crazy with desire. When he makes his way back to my mouth, he pauses for a moment and I swear, I feel my heart weave into his, because the look of true adoration has never been so clear. Our frantic pace is frozen in this moment and I try and memorize everything about it knowing how soon everything can be taken away. I notice the way his eyes fill with excitement when I trace my fingers along his bare chest, along his beautiful tattoo, and how the faint scar on the side of his broad chin is the only place that doesn’t have the rough stubble that I assume is purposely there, and I love it.

  When he moves to kiss me again instead of ripping off my clothes like I wish he would, I see hesitation sneak across his face and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let another night go by without being with him. “Gage, please, take me now. I’ve waited too long, and don’t want to wait anymore.” I find the boldness that makes me, me, and am pulling Gage’s pants down before he can answer. I hear the deep gruff of his laugh, and I can see just how much he wants me by the enormous bulge in his tight, grey boxer briefs and let my gaze take in every curve of his divinely cut abs. Before I can get my hands back on him, Gage takes my hands and brings me back up to my feet and lifts me up and lays me down on my bed. He’s like an angel from Heaven, standing over me, the light from the hallway shining on him like a goddamned halo. I can only think to myself, if this isn’t a sign I’m doing the right thing, then I don’t know what is, and the thought makes me smile.

  Gage smiles down at me as he hovers above me, his eyes drinking me in. “I told you before, Jessica,” he leans down and kisses between my heaving breasts, taking them in his hands and caressing them as he trails kisses back up my neck. “I’m going to spend this entire night showing you how much I love you.” He nips at my ear and pulls back and looks me square in the eyes, reaching my soul. “You fill the hole in my heart.”

  I don’t know why, but when he says that I’m his, I turn to butter and want nothing more than for it to be true. “I’m all yours.”

  He laughs momentarily before kissing me so passionately that I almost explode with ecstasy.

  The night is just as he promised. He made sure every inch of me, mind, body, and soul knows that he truly does love me, and for the first night in years I think only of him. Only of Gage.

  I wake up looking out onto the lagoon just as the sun begins peeking over the houses thinking it is the most beautiful sunrise I’ve ever seen. I roll over hoping to have an opportunity to unabashedly gawk at Gage’s sexy body when I’m met with bright blue eyes and a hotter-than-hot face grinning from ear to ear, and smile back while self-consciously pulling the blanket over my nearly naked body. He grabs my hand to stop me. “Oh no you don’t. I was enjoying myself.”

  “I bet you were,” I joke, and continue to pull the covers up, “but it’s twenty degrees outside and I’m cold.”

  He reaches over and easily pulls me up against his warm, hard body. I love the feeling of his skin next to mine and don’t think it’s something I can ever get sick of. I already love the way our bodies seem to fit together perfectly, as if made just for each other. A part of me thinks that could actually be true. After everything we’ve both gone through, there’s no one else who could truly understand me, the new me, the way he does. I don’t have the nagging guilt I usually feel when I think of a future with Gage, and for a moment, I actually allow myself to imagine one. But then my love sick haze is cleared with a bitter gust of reality, and I remember that Gage could be leaving me, and my bliss is quelled with fear. I was so caught up in my longing to be with Gage, my need to connect with him, that I forgot that fleeting topic that Joey revealed at dinner.

  “What’s going on in that little head of yours?” He presses a kiss to my forehead and tilts my chin up so I’m looking into eyes so caring, that it almost breaks my heart in two.

  I decide not to ruin the moment. “Just thinking about last night,” I say and lean in, placing a kiss on his full lips.

  “Oh, no you don’t. What’s wrong, babe? I can see it in your eyes. Are you ok?” He looks as if he’s trying to read my mind when he tucks my hair behind my ear and a look of understanding crosses his face. “Does this have to do with what Joey said last night?” He answers his own question before I get the chance. “Of course it is.”

  I try to sit up so that we can have this conversation, but he doesn’t let me, and pulls me down up agains
t his naked body and turns my face so that I have no choice to look at him, fully dominating me in every way. “I won’t take it if you and Charlotte won’t come with me, Jess. I want you to know that before anything else is said.” His voice is so steady it almost unnerves me.

  “But…”

  He cuts me off, his voice deep and demanding. “No buts, Jessica. I know it all seems to be happening so fast, but we have both been broken hearted for so long, I don’t want to wait anymore. I love you, Jessica, and I’m not going anywhere without you.”

  I don’t know if my heart will let me get the words out if I look into those compelling eyes, so I look down at our entwined hands. “I love you too, Gage, more than you probably realize. More than I ever thought possible.” I make the mistake of looking up at him to see the sadness looming because he knows what’s coming next. “Joey said this is a chance of a lifetime. Your dream. And I want nothing more than for your dreams to come true. But it’s not just me I have to think about. I have Charlotte. And I can’t take her away from her friends and family when she’s lost so much already.” I brush the stray hairs that hang so perfectly off his brow, knowing that I’ll never be able to get him out of my heart after last night. “It doesn’t have to mean the end for us though, does it? I could visit…”

  “Just take a deep breath and shut up, Jess.” Gage is almost laughing at me and I have no idea why. He presses his forehead to mine, taking in a deep breath with a puzzling grin playing on his sexy face. “Yes, it’s an opportunity of a life time, but so are you, Jess. Some people spend their entire lives looking for true love, and I’ve been lucky enough to find it twice, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to lose it again.” His voice is harsh and captivating all at once.