“Like, literally at this moment or after labor?
“After labor,” I nod.
She’s leaning over the counter to my desk, and I don’t care who hears us, because this is something that has been plaguing my mind since the damn video.
“Well, I mean Dornan hasn’t ever said anything. I think it’s better since you know they stitch that shit up tight, and you have to wait six weeks before doing it.”
“I mean but,” I lean forward and whisper, “it gets so big.”
I motion with my hands the size a vagina gets when a baby comes out, maybe over exaggerating, is watermelon size too big?
“I think you will be fine.”
Her words didn’t really comfort me, but I resisted Googling ‘blown out vaginas due to labor.’ At my next appointment, I ask my doctor if she could sew me up extra tight. To which she smiled, patted my shoulder, and said, of course. My mind was in baby overload, looking online at chat groups, reading books, and any information I could get on anything baby related. We had a few months, but still nothing in the nursery was even close to being done, and I was waiting for my nesting phase to kick my ass in gear.
So, being preoccupied with all that, I was stunned when Nathan asked me, “When do you want to get married?”
We were sitting in bed, me with my bowl of green grapes and beef jerky, while he lay beside me with his hand on my belly.
“Before or after the baby?” he continued.
“I hadn’t thought about it,” I replied, setting one of the hundred baby books I was reading down on the nightstand.
“It doesn’t matter to me,” he said. “Where should we have it? Do you want it to be big or small?”
All I could do was sit there with my mouth practically hanging open, but I had no answers. I honestly had not been thinking of anything like the wedding.
“I think we should keep it small, maybe here at the house, or a church. I don’t care, we could have a party at the club after or something.”
“Okay,” I nodded.
Nathan looked up at me and saw my dumbfounded expression, which caused his dimples to come out.
“We can worry about it after the baby, okay?” Leaning up he kissed me before rolling over. “Now cuddle me,” he demanded.
I pee and brush my teeth before returning to the bedroom, clicking off the side lamp, and spooning up behind my man. We got comfortable, letting the silence come alongside the crickets and other insects making noise outside.
“Is it weird I want jelly?” I ask.
“What kind of jelly?” he laughs softly.
“Strawberry.”
“No, that’s not weird.”
I guess out of all the things I’d been craving, no this wasn’t the weirdest. The mayonnaise and cookie dough combo I wanted probably was number one on that list.
“But I don’t want it on anything.”
“Like eat it with a spoon?”
“Yeah.”
Nathan laughed and brought my hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss on my palm.
“I love the shit out of you.”
***
That Monday I decided I needed to get something done, and planning a wedding for the next weekend seemed doable…yeah right. Initially I hadn’t intended to pull it all together that quickly, but I was aiming for maybe within the next two weeks. But as I began and everything started falling into place, it seemed as if the end of the week was actually possible.
At lunch time on Monday, I asked Nathan for his license, since he was staying at the garage to finish a tire rotation, and didn’t even ask me why before telling me to get his wallet from his back pocket. I went down to the courthouse and filled out the paperwork for a marriage license. The woman at the desk provided me with names of officiants that would perform an out of the church ceremony. By the end of the day Wednesday, I had booked an ordained minister, picked up the marriage license, rented some tables and chairs, and ordered flowers.
Monday night I ordered a wedding dress online, and had it delivered to the local seamstress in Plantain. Tuesday at lunch I went and got measured, and would have to go in Friday morning to make sure it fit. Even with everything going on, I wasn’t stressed, even though this was going to be one of the biggest days of my life. All I had left really to do was get Nathan’s ring, which was a crap shoot since I had no idea what size finger he had. The man at the store gave me a ring in the most common size and if he needed it resized afterward, they could do that.
Calling my parents, I told them of my plans along with an invite. Other than talking to my sister on the phone a few times, I still didn’t feel like I was ready for her to be back in my life for something this huge. I also called Nathan’s sister Alexandra, who was needless to say shocked, and completely confused since she only knew me as the girl who rented the apartment above the garage. Explaining the story of Nathan and me, the cliff notes version, she seemed to understand, but still totally confused with the timeline.
“Hey Maven?” I ask from my desk.
Nathan is standing in front of my counter talking to a customer, as Maven comes out of her office and leans her elbows onto the ledge.
“What’s up, babe?”
“Do you think we could close the shop early on Friday?” I ask.
“Ummm, probably,” she shrugs, “why?”
“Good, can you come to a wedding?”
She looks at me confused.
“A wedding? Who’s wedding?”
“Mine and Nathan’s.”
Her jaw drops, Nathan stops talking and looks at me.
“We’re getting married Friday,” I repeat to her.
“We’re getting-” he stops looking at me and back to his customer, “excuse me,” he says to the man before once again looking at me, “we’re getting married Friday? As in this Friday? As in two days from now?” His words are rushed and a bit panicked.
“Yes,” I smile.
“Yay!” Maven finally exclaims and claps her hands once. “Yes, of course we’ll close the shop for the day.”
“I don’t have a suit, or a ring for you, where are we having it? I have to call my sister-”
“All you have to worry about is being there, and wear whatever you want.”
Nathan’s mouth mimics a fish, opening and closing. Moving his hands as if they will help get words out, before he closes his mouth and looks at me for a long minute. His face relaxes as I sit there smiling at him, and he slowly, oh so slowly begins to return my smile.
“Okay,” he nods.
The decimal level at which Missy screams over the phone when I tell her our news, nearly pops my eardrum. She frantically spouts out things we needed to get done in that short of time, basically I tell her what I told Nathan, be there at noon and look nice.
Thankfully the dress fit, lace with long sleeves that draped over my hands, a deep v cut in the front and back, as the hem billowed over my bare feet. I asked for only one bouquet of flowers, a mix of purple, oranges, and pinks, of any flower the florist had, along with making a crown-like headband of the same flowers, that I could wear instead of a veil. Opting to wear my hair down in flowing waves, I kept my makeup light, my dreamcatcher bracelet and engagement ring finishing off the look.
“I can’t believe this is really happening,” Maven sniffles. “I remember you at my wedding, and it seems like a lifetime ago from the way you were then. I’d say you’re back to being you but you’re not, you’ve changed, you’ve become something I wish people saw when they looked at me.”
Her words shock me, I always admired Maven for everything she is, and now here she is saying this about me. Our babies knock together as we hug and we both look down, letting them have their moment as we had ours.
“Girl, wait till you see Nathan. Christ,” Missy says as she joins us in the bedroom.
The thought of him being my husband sends me into giggles, and I can barely hold back my excitement.
“Can I go now?�
�� I ask her, my cheeks hurting from smiling as I practically bounce on my toes.
“Yes, everyone is here and everything is ready,” she smiles with watery eyes.
The three of us embrace before I run, well run as fast as a six-month pregnant woman can, out to the side door. Everyone is standing in the yard, I wanted everything to be organic and flowing, deciding the guests could stand around us as we exchanged vows. There are flowers on white tables beside the garage, along with lanterns and strings of lights in the trees for when after the sun sets. My dad takes my hand, and we exchange smiles before he kisses my temple and leads me to my man.
Then my eyes land on Nathan standing with Dornan and Sven talking. Wyatt’s holding Nathan’s hand and looking around at all the guests, a little unsure of what’s going on. As my dad and me walk through our friends and family, the talking slowly quiets and then stops just before Nathan turns to look at me. I watch him inhale a deep breath as he sees me, his expression softening the closer I get. He’s wearing a black button down dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up along with grey dress pants that fit him to a T, his hair in a low bun; needless to say, he looks hot. Taking the hand that isn’t holding Wyatt’s into mine, the minister approaches us and begins, marrying us in front of all the important people in our lives.
We exchange only a few lines of our own vows, pledging eternal love. Even with everyone standing close to us, it doesn’t stop my man from pouring his heart out to me and our little person, his eyes watering, causing me to giggle as my heart swells. Wiping under my eyes, before my fingers run under his. After the ten-minute ceremony, dinner begins. There are only forty people in attendance and I love it, this is what I wanted and it’s perfect. It reminds me of Sunday’s at Missy’s, everyone just enjoying one another’s company. My parents sit with Missy and Sven, and everything feels right, both of my worlds coming together as one.
Some of the prospects hooked up two of the speaker systems used at club parties, so I could play music from my iPod, and Nathan’s record player. My father and I share a dance while Nathan danced with Missy. She isn’t his birth mom, but I think she’s the closest thing he’s had to one in years, so when he asked her, I nearly burst into tears. Nathan and I share a dance as we have so many times in the kitchen or living room, but this time we’re Mr. and Mrs. Westmore. I decided on Louis Armstrong “La vien Rose,” which is the song Nathan was listening to the night I realized he owned the house. The memory comes back to me as we sway, me bursting into the house in my t-shirt about to raise hell when I saw him.
That was really the moment my life changed forever, and I can tell by the look on his face when the song begins that he’s remembering too, smiling at me before inhaling deeply against my hairline. Once everyone is full of food and cake, I confirm with Dornan that the vehicle I requested is out front. We can leave now and head out to our honeymoon destination. I wanted to make sure we got there at sunset, which meant we needed to get a move on. Everyone was told to stay and enjoy the night, before I pulled Nathan into the house and to our bedroom.
“Really? With all our guests still here?” he asks.
I give him a look.
“I mean, if that’s what you want, who am I to deny my wife?” he says while beginning to unbutton his shirt.
“No,” I reply, even though hearing him call me his wife instantly drenches me.
His eyes follow mine to the bed, where I had packed two bags for us.
“I thought you might want to change before we leave,” I state.
Nathan moves towards me, cupping my face and kissing me, pouring all of his love into me.
“I love you, I can’t believe you did all this in a week,” he says, pressing one last soft kiss.
I link our fingers and bring his hand, now adorned with a thin gold band, to my lips, kissing the skin there.
“It fits, right?” I ask.
“Yes,” he hums while pressing his lips to mine.
“You need a ring,” he says.
I ignore him because I already have my engagement ring and that’s more than enough for me, we’re standing in our room, soft kisses and touches and it takes everything to break me from my needing this man. I palm both his ass cheeks while saying, “Come on, I want to get going.”
Nathan pushes his pelvis against me, making me aware he’s hard.
“Keep doing that and guests or no guests, I’m fucking you.”
I shake my head and begin to remove my dress.
“Okay, seriously?” he asks as I peel the front down to reveal my breasts.
“Stop being a man and go,” I shoo him away with a flick of my wrist. “There’ll be plenty of time for that this weekend.”
With a groan, he turns and heads towards his dresser. I put on a pair of cut off jean shorts and a loose-fitting cotton shirt that hangs off my shoulder, braiding my hair to the side. Nathan pulls on his jeans and a t-shirt, before grabbing our bags and heading back outside.
With one last congratulation from our guests, and Missy assuring me the house would be locked up when they left, I pull Nathan out to the front of the house, and to our mode of transportation. Dornan just laughed when I asked if he could find me a VW van, but here it was. Vintage and orange, but still what I imagined. Nathan laughs when he sees it, and as he slides open the side door to put our bags in, he eyes the cooler, sleeping bags, pillows, and mound of blankets, but doesn’t question what we’re doing.
“Aren’t you going to ask where we’re going?”
This is probably the thirtieth time I’ve asked since we’ve gotten on the road.
“Unlike you, I like surprises.”
“Ugggh,” I groan, it was eating me up inside to keep this quiet.
As we drive I give him directions, and even as we get closer to the beach, he still doesn’t ask what we’re doing. With windows rolled down, the sun low in the sky, we pull up to a private beach. He drives down by some rocks, before reversing and backing up about seventy feet from the shore. The waves roll in with the high tide as we both get out, clasping hands, as we meet one another in front of the van, walking down towards the water. He stands behind me, arms wrapping around me to lace his fingers over our baby. We stand in silence as the waves roll in, the wind surrounding us as seagulls fly overhead.
“You’re amazing,” he says into my ear.
Melting back against him, this moment is perfect, this day is perfect, and I sigh with a dreamy feeling inside me.
23
The beach property is owned by an acquaintance of Skye’s father Tony, the six miles of private beach she arranged for us to use for the weekend, is the most amazing spot. Aside from a cluster of large rocks that we parked by, the beach is empty, white sand stretching all around us. Beyond the sand and shore, are huge palm trees that line a large area of grass, and up a slight hill on the property sat a mansion.
The owners were on a European cruise, but told Skye if we needed to use the house for anything, that they didn’t mind and gave her the key code. When we parked, and got out to watch the sunset I was in heaven, my girl and little person with me was all I needed, until Skye scrambled out of my arms with wide eyes.
“We need to make a fire before the sun goes down or we won’t be able to see shit.”
I grab her arm and pull her into my side as she began to walk past me.
“We can use the headlights from the van, just chill with me for a minute.”
With a small smile, she leans against me, her head nuzzling into my neck. Nothing can be said to tell her how much I love her, how perfect this is, and how perfect the day was. So instead we just stand there in silence, until I hear Skye’s stomach rumble.
“Hungry?” I ask.
“Shut up,” she grumbles before shooting me a smile.
We unpack the supplies from the van, bundles of fire wood, newspaper and a box of matches. As I dig a hole for the fire pit, I occasionally glance at Skye who is rummaging through the bags in the back,
then with a grunt, sets down a cooler bigger than her.
“Seriously?” I stand, walking towards her. “That’s too fucking heavy for you to be lifting, I’m right here why didn’t you ask me?”
“Calm down,” she shakes her head, “I just pushed it and it slid out.”
My girl, so stubborn. She looks up at me while placing her hands on her hips, eyebrows raised.
“But while you’re here, can you move this over there and also grab this other cooler and bag for me?” she says, smiling sweetly at me.
“Anything for my wife,” I answer, leaning down to kiss her forehead.
By the time I get the fire started and throw on some charcoal, Skye hands me a metal grill top which I toss onto the center of the coals, then place the hot dogs onto it. When I get everything settled and cooking, I look over to see she’s made a make shift bed on the floor of the van since there are no backseats. I notice how raised the bedding is and ask, “There’s a mattress under there?”
“Well yeah, pregnant here,” she says, pointing both her index fingers at her belly.
When we sit down in the cloth beach chairs and begin to eat, the sun has set and all we hear are the waves crashing onto the shore, along with the crackling of the wood in the fire I started after taking the hot dogs off.
“This is perfect,” I state.
“Yeah?”
Her gorgeous eyes look at me, full of question and hope that, yes, I think this is perfect. Her hair is blowing slightly in the breeze, her skin glowing in the fire light and moonlight and she looks fucking breathtaking.
“Yes.”
She bites her lower lip and smiles at me, relief washing over her expression, like she could ever doubt that she would do something less than amazing for me. Taking her hand, I link it with mine and pull her up as I stand, cupping her cheeks as her hands move to my waist. The way she looks up at me, makes me feel like I can conquer anything, having the love of this woman has made me a man. Proud to be her husband, and honored to be the father to her children, I want to give them everything and be everything to them and I will…just so she will always look at me like this.
Come as you Are: Plantain Series Book Two Page 23
