Still, Belial doesn’t speak, but the tightening of his jaw lets me know he’s mad.
While I’d rather stay on the ground and fall asleep, I know an impending argument when I see one. I sit up and force myself to stand, only swaying once before I’m stable.
Once I’m sure I won’t fall over, I lift my chin. “Well? Are you not going to congratulate me?” After all, I did what he wanted. I used my powers to defeat a powerful demon.
He should either be apologizing for putting me in danger or praising me for my success, but he definitely shouldn’t be glaring at me like I’m a wayward child who went against his instructions.
“Why would I congratulate you? You didn’t do anything.”
I jaw drops. “Excuse me?”
“You didn’t do anything,” Belial repeats, clenching his fists.
Anger simmers. “Are you insane?” I cannot believe what I’m hearing. “Did you not see my holy fire?”
“Your powers took over because you refused to try to fight. You could’ve been killed.” Rage swirls in his eyes. I imagine it matches the fury in mine.
We glare at each other in silence. Belial is the first to break away, working his jaw as he stares off at some unknown point in the distance.
I lose my patience.
“Why are you so angry?” I shout. “I’m not the one who wanted to fight the demon!”
“No, but you resigned yourself to die,” he barks back, whirling on me with wild, violet eyes. “And don’t you dare try to deny it.”
I scowl. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You,” he cuts off, gesturing to me with a shaky arm. I’m stricken by the physical display of his emotion. Normally, Belial’s feelings are confined to his expression.
He swallows and continues, “During the fight, you thought about giving up. You thought it would mean Azazel wouldn’t get his way, and you believed your death would be worth it.” His fury travels through the air, hitting me in the chest, and rattles my bones.
I struggle with what to say. I want to deny it, but my anger has other ideas.
“So what? It’s true. Without me, Azazel can’t open the Gates of Hell. He can’t call on Lucifer or bring out any more powerful demons. In the grand scheme of things, my life doesn’t matter that much.”
“That is the only thing that matters, Aspen,” Belial roars. The rocks around us slide away from the violent noise. His figure blurs, reappearing right in front of me.
Belial grabs onto my arms. I think he’s going to shake me, but I’m surprised when he draws me into his chest and wraps me in a constricting embrace.
I inhale sharply. The scent of sandalwood, jasmine, and sweat fills my nostrils. Belial holds on to me tight. Belatedly, I realize he is trembling. My anger flows out of my chest.
Tentatively, I place my hands on his back. “Belial?”
He doesn’t speak—not at first.
The original demon buries his face in my hair. My stomach tightens, but I don’t try to pull away. I don’t want to pull away.
Minutes later, Belial finally murmurs, “You know your holy fire is formidable, even to original demons, yet you didn’t call on it until it was almost too late.”
If I weren’t so tired or affected by the emotion I hear in his voice, I might’ve argued.
Instead, I say nothing.
He’s right; I’d accepted the fact I might die.
I had tried to call on my power to protect me, but did I put in as much effort as I could have?
No.
That being said, even now, I can feel the holy fire flickering under my skin, especially where Belial’s body touches mine.
“Well,” I speak against his chest. My lips brush his thin, tight shirt. It feels like I’m essentially kissing his skin. It takes everything I have not to shiver. “I don’t think that will be a problem in the future.” I tell him how it feels like my power is stronger and more accessible after it protected me from the wyvern.
Belial leans back to look into my eyes. There’s a heart wrenching mix of anticipation and fear in his gaze. “Truly? You think you have complete access to your power?”
I hold up a hand and concentrate. Within two seconds, holy fire flickers in my palm. With a thought, it easily rises off my skin, floating above my flesh.
Belial’s face slackens with surprise, then I’m once again crushed against him. “Thank God.”
I laugh and return the hug.
It doesn’t escape me how ironic it is for an original demon to be thanking God for anything, but I keep the comment to myself.
“So…” I mumble over his shoulder. “Are you going to apologize for throwing me in danger?”
I feel Belial’s head move from side to side. “We are in a war, Aspen. And you are at the epicenter of victory for our enemy. You have your powers now. You are less vulnerable. So, no, I will not apologize for doing what needed to be done.”
I sigh. Of course not.
“Well, how about for reading my mind? My thoughts are private, Belial. I’d prefer if you don’t go diving into them whenever you want.” Especially when I’m unable to control my thoughts lately. The last thing I want is for Belial to hear my confusion about my feelings for him. Talk about embarrassing.
“I can’t read your mind, little mountain.”
I lean my head away from his shoulder and stare at him in disbelief, ignoring how close his lips are to mine. “Um… yes you can. You just admitted you did a few minutes ago.” And he’s done it so many times since I’ve met him.
But demons can’t lie…
What is going on here?
Thankfully, Belial explains, “I can’t read your mind, Aspen, but I can get a sense of your thoughts when they are particularly strong. The impressions are more noticeable when you’re in a heightened emotional state.”
Huh… I guess that makes sense.
Still, I take a step back, freeing myself from his hold. I lift a brow. “How is that possible?”
He gives me a pointed look. “Are you forgetting our souls are linked, little mountain?”
No.
How could I?
I feel the evidence of it every time he walks in the room.
It’s my turn to avert my gaze.
Staring down at the sharp, black rocks, I take a deep breath. “Well… your plan worked. I guess we can go home now.”
Part of me expects Belial to press the soulmate issue. I can practically feel it brimming in the air between us. He wants to speak about it so bad, he’s told me as much, but today is not the day he decides to press me.
Slowly, he takes my hand. I look up into his eyes, and I can’t even begin to separate out all the emotions I see swirling in his enigmatic gaze. “Yes, Aspen,” he breathes my name like it’s the key to his salvation. “Let’s go home.”
Chapter Eleven
The dining room is abuzz with voices. I pause in the doorway, taking in the scene.
Freddy, Burns, and two other guys sit at the far end of the table, gesturing wildly as they enthusiastically talk about something. From the bits I can pick up, it has something to do with sports. Their dinner plates are picked clean. Olina’s told me the academy students were initially reluctant to eat food prepared by Belial’s staff, but, apparently, that’s no longer the case.
My gaze travels and lands on Lauren and Fiona tucked against each other, sipping on steaming soup and murmuring quietly. Periodically, they cast timid glances to the guys at the other end of the room. Several other students are also dispersed throughout the massive space, looking far more at ease than they did their first few days here.
The whole scene feels… normal. It’s like we’re back at St.Michaels, eating together in the cafeteria.
I don’t know if it’s the buzz of active power flowing through my veins or seeing my classmates at ease, but I feel relaxed. At this moment, I’m not burdened by the secrets I keep from my loved ones, and I can nearly pretend there isn’t an original demon trying t
o destroy humanity. My life is almost normal.
Familiar voices fill the corridor behind me. I spin to see Cortney and Lex walking arm and arm, but they separate the moment they see me.
I resist the urge to roll my eyes. The two were matched by the academy’s assessor. There’s nothing wrong with them dating, and I’ve already reassured them I’m not weirded out by it. But it seems like that’s not enough to cure them of their awkwardness.
“Hey, Aspen,” Cortney greets. Her voice sounds a little too high. “I looked for you this morning, but you were nowhere to be found.”
I try to hide the guilt from my face. “Yeah, sorry. I was training with Olina.”
It’s been two days since I faced the wyvern and my powers, thankfully, remain accessible. I’ve been so excited by the new development and what it could mean in our fight against Azazel, that I’ve spent almost every waking moment working with Olina and Belial to hone in on my skills.
Lex and Cortney have voiced their concern over my whereabouts these past two evenings at dinner, but I have yet to tell them of this latest development. Neither of them know about Hermona’s power—my power—and I’m not sure how they will react.
“Yeah right,” Lex speaks up, ruffling my hair when he draws near. “I know my little sister well enough to know when you’re hiding something.”
My chest squeezes.
I’m saved from needing to respond when, after throwing cautious glances to either side of the corridor, Cortney quietly asks, “Are you still avoiding Logan? He’s been seething for days.”
I don’t know if this topic is any better than the first.
“I’m not avoiding Logan, but I haven’t spoken to him. I’ve been busy.” That’s the truth. Honestly, I’ve been too preoccupied with mastering my holy fire to think of much else. I wouldn’t even remember to come to dinner with my friends if Olina didn’t pay attention to the time.
My best friend nods, accepting my response. “I didn’t think so.”
“Not that we would blame you if you were avoiding him.” Lex’s face pinches into a scowl. “The jerk doesn’t deserve your time.”
I both adore, and despise, Lex’s overprotective behavior.
“It’s fine,” I reassure him. “I promise. I’m over it.”
“Are you?” Cortney asks, sounding surprised. “I mean, not that you shouldn’t be… I’m just surprised. I kinda thought you liked him a lot.” Her cheeks glow red and I can tell she feels bad about what she’s said. Cortney is so sweet, and the last thing she wants to do is to stir up any hurt feelings.
I’m quick to say, “Yes, Cortney. I’m sure.”
“Well, that’s a relief. It means you shouldn’t have a problem finally speaking with me.”
Cortney and I both freeze when we recognize the owner of voice. Lex, on the other hand, immediately flies into action.
He steps into Logan’s personal space, puts both hands on his chest, and shoves him back—straight into the dining room.
My ex-mentor stumbles but doesn’t fall. He straightens and meets Lex’s hostile glare.
“I thought you were told to stay the hell away from her,” Lex snaps. His hands clench in fists at his sides. I pray my foster brother isn’t rash enough to actually try to fight Logan. Lex may be a good fighter, but he’s not as good as Logan.
Instead of responding, Logan looks over Lex’s shoulder and meets my gaze. “We need to talk.”
“Don’t look at her!” Lex shouts.
I wince, hoping no one in the dining room has noticed the commotion. Once glance confirms I’m not so lucky.
Fiona and Lauren have abandoned their huddled whispers, their attention zeroed in on the drama unfolding right in front of me. The rest of the academy students are equally enthralled.
Ugh!
I need to defuse this situation. And I need to do it now.
“Lex,” I keep my voice even. “Stop. It’s all right.”
“It’s not all right, Aspen.” He doesn’t take his eyes off Logan. “This guy tricked you into having feelings for him, and then he almost got you killed when he organized a Guardian raid on Belial’s property. He doesn’t deserve to talk to you ever again.”
I’m mortified. While I’m sure my peers heard rumors about my relationship with Logan and what happened the night of the warehouse, Lex just confirmed the worst of it—the scandalous part of it. I can already hear the dining room filling with stunned whispers and exclamations of surprise.
Lex, unaware of the bomb he just detonated over my life, continues, “I don’t know why Belial lets you stay here after what you did, but I’ll be damned if I let you weasel your way back into my sister’s life. She’s done with you. Crawl back to your dad and do his bidding. No one wants you here.”
Throughout Lex’s rant, Logan has not taken his eyes from me once. His face is carefully void of emotion. He doesn’t defend himself, but he doesn’t look ready to retreat either.
I sigh. Enough of this.
“Stop, Lex. That’s enough.”
“It will never be enough, not after what he—”
“Stop!” I shout, the strength of it finally forces Lex to look my direction.
I give him my widest, most pleading, but also determined, stare. “Stop it, Lex.”
“Aspen, I—”
“No,” I interrupt. “I’ll talk to Logan. It’s not a big deal. You’re causing a scene.”
Belatedly, Lex realizes his show has caught the attention of the dining room. His cheeks don’t flush with shame, but I know he’s a little embarrassed.
He turns back to me. “You don’t have to do this, Aspen. You don’t owe him anything.”
Oh, how I wish that were true.
Yes, Logan took my heart and crushed it with his bare hands, but he also treated me as an equal. He trusted me to help him discover the truth behind the missing Guardians, and he never asked me to sit on the sidelines when things got dangerous. As his mentee, I learned a lot from him: like how to be a Guardian and how crooked the Shadowguard and council can be.
So yes, while I feel humiliated for believing he ever held romantic feelings for me, he also protected me and included me in his plans to help Shadowguard society. Without him, I would be in the dark, and easy pickings for Azazel and his hoard of mundane demons.
“It’s fine, Lex,” I reply, not attempting to hide my resignation. “I promise.”
For a moment, I don’t believe Lex is going to let me go that easily. But one look at my face, and I see the fight leave his body. “Fine, but Cortney and I will wait for you in the dining room for dinner.”
“No.” I doubt food will sound appetizing after this conversation. “That’s okay. I’ll just ask Olina to bring me something in my room.”
I can see Lex wants to object. I don’t give him a chance.
Once again, I meet Logan’s stare. “Come on. We can talk in the library.”
The walk to the library is tense and silent. I consider trying to dispel the awkwardness, but realize I have no idea what to say. By default, I opt to remain silent. It’s Logan who wants to clear the air between us, and I will give him this chance. Then, this will all be over and done with.
I turn onto the hall leading right to the library but stop short when I see a shadow detach itself from the wall, blocking our path.
I nearly sound the alarm, but then I recognize the guard. “Ladros?”
“Good evening, Lady Aspen,” the mundane demon replies, bending his head with respect. When he looks up, however, his red-eyed stare shifts to Logan. And the look on his face is far from respectful.
“Um, what are you doing here?” As far as I know, Belial doesn’t post guards randomly around the inside of the safe house.
Ladros’s attention shifts to me. The hostility in his expression instantly fades. “I’m on duty.”
“What duty?”
“Ensuring none of Master Belial’s guests wander into areas they shouldn’t.” Once again, Logan is on the receiving end of h
is glare.
“That’s ridiculous, Ladros.” I don’t like the idea of demons and students not trusting each other in the safe house.
Ladros dips his chin, acknowledging my words, but says, “I am simply doing what Master Belial commands, Lady Aspen.”
Of course he is.
I sigh. There is no point in arguing with a guard who is just doing his job. “I understand, but Logan and I need to have a private conversation in the library. May we pass?”
Ladros eyes Logan again, this time skeptically. “Has Master Belial been informed of this conversation?”
“No, because it’s private.” I cross my arms, not bothering to hide my irritation. “I don’t need Belial’s permission for everything, Ladros. You know this.”
I expect the guard to disagree, or at least insist he accompany us into the library. I’m surprised when he does the exact opposite.
“Indeed you don’t, my lady,” he replies with a secretive grin. The tips of his fangs barely peek out from behind his lips. He steps aside. “I shall remain here in case you need anything.”
I pause, unsure if this is somehow a trick, but Ladros seems sincere.
I nod. “Thank you, Ladros.”
“You’re welcome, Lady Aspen.”
I move past the guard before he has a chance to change his mind. Logan follows.
Silence, once again, falls between us as we close the distance to the library. I push open the heavy door, gesturing for Logan to walk in first.
Once inside, I close the door and flip the nearest light switch. The library illuminates, showcasing the countless volumes and artifacts in the modest space.
I walk towards the table in the back of the room.
Just like during the meeting with the lesser demon alliance, I take the seat where I face the doorway. Or, more accurately, where I face Logan.
My ex-mentor’s careful mask has slipped away. He’s skeptical of my calm behavior. I imagine he expected this interaction to be more contentious.
He doesn’t know I have absolutely zero desire to prolong this tension between us. I’m ready to get everything out in the open so we can move on. We have bigger problems to worry about than our dysfunctional mentor/mentee relationship.
Demon War: Shadowguard Academy Book 4 Page 7
