by Laura Winter
“What are you doing? Lunch isn’t over.”
I didn’t have to turn around to know that big monkey had come to collect me. I think he liked being able to show off his strength around everyone else. It made him that much more intimidating, especially when he took me down. I was a legend for putting up fights, or at least I pretended to be. I stuck my hand around the bookcase and found the pen Nate had hidden for me.
Big monkey reached his hands around my waist when I didn’t answer him, dragging me away with a stronger yank than I had expected. I barely gripped the pen in time as I sent the bookcase crashing down. Big monkey threw me over his shoulder and chuckled, looking at the mess of books and pencil nubs I had stashed behind the case.
“Oh, they are going to have so much fun breaking you tomorrow.”
My opportunity was growing shorter. The bookcase had made too much noise, and now people were going to be curious as to what was happening. They’d come in here to see, and Nate would be with them too. I shifted the pen to my left hand and swung hard, stabbing big monkey in the upper arm. He howled and threw me headfirst into the TV as he tumbled down with me. A mixture of my bodyweight and big monkey’s sent the TV stand into splinters around us.
The blood was dripping down my neck as I lay there, stunned and staring up at the ceiling. The blow to my head was making me dizzy, but it was also terribly clarifying. The pain was familiar. I had felt it so many times before. Once when I snuck out of Aidan’s window to get into the school at The Complex, another when Nate and I were fighting… ourselves? And then a third time when some dark haired guy was glaring at me from across a table.
I pressed my hand into the back of my head and felt the warm, sticky mess roll over my fingers. As I pulled my hand in front of my face, I felt myself heave. The blood was changing from a dark red to a blue. Blood shouldn’t be blue, so why was I more confused that it was red? My questioning was cut short as big monkey regained himself. He stood up, his face red in anger. I had no idea why I couldn’t control my laughter as I saw him yank the pen out of his arm, red blood spilling down. He threw it to the ground and glared at me.
“You’re going to pay for that,” he growled, reaching over with his good arm to pick me up by my hair.
He yanked me out of the mess and toward the doctor’s office. I screamed and kicked, trying to fight back, but my head was hurting too much to keep it up longer. I wrapped my hands around big monkey’s forearm so I could release some of the pressure he had from pulling my hair. Doctor Jackson was already waiting by the door to let me in.
No, Jackson. That was the dark haired guy who made my head hurt when I first got here. I could remember that now. He was the one who took the voices from me. He took everything I knew.
I dug my fingers into big monkey and tried to pull away. He just held tighter as I screamed louder. Before I could regain my balance and kick, the doctor swung his arm down and stuck my leg with a needle.
My tongue went numb as I felt words fall out of my mouth. “You took my voices. You made me empty.”
I couldn’t control my body anymore. My vision was blurring, but I could see the crowd of people watching me. Skinny was back on the couch, his blank stare into emptiness reminding me what I should be fighting against. But I couldn’t find the energy.
Then I saw the people still filing in from the cafeteria. Nate stood, his eyes wide and mouth open, as Madeline held his hand.
I closed my eyes and wished I could get my mouth to work. I hoped that somehow, some way, I would be able to tell him that even though I didn’t remember him, I loved him.
I love you too.
My eyes shot open when his voice echoed through my head. I locked eyes on him and saw he was crying, and when he realized I heard him, the tears fell faster. My eyes burned too, but they burned heavier with sleep. I slumped back into big monkey as the common room went black.
39
Nate
I rocked back and forth in the corner, the destroyed TV and bookcase splintered around me. Finnley was flooding back to me, but it was her new life that she didn’t know. Clara was created because Finnley had lost her memory before, but she had to deal with it again. And the memories just kept coming. Everything about her, everything about us, filled my heart; the first time I told her I loved her, the times a simple touch or kiss would send my heart racing…
The moment I watched her walk to the back of history class and I just knew she was the one. That same feeling as she sat on the bench at the fair and I told her I wanted to marry her. Watching my fiery fiancée punch a guy who had disrespected her. Every single thing about her, I knew again.
But I was never going to see her again. Just because I had my memories back didn’t mean I could save her. The cuff still kept me from using my powers. Just beyond that door, Jackson was doing something to her, and I was helpless, surrounded by walking comas.
I had to fight, just like she had. She still didn’t know me, she didn’t have her powers, but she was still fighting to protect me. She was always the strong one, but now it was my turn. I stood up off the ground, but Madeline slid in front of me to stop me.
“No,” she said firmly. Much too demanding for a five-year-old.
“You don’t know what I’m going to do,” I said, not really wanting to push her out of the way. I didn’t have time for this.
Madeline folded her arms. “You’re going to expose yourself trying to save her. You’re going to try to overpower that nurse, take her keys, and get through the door. It works for a little bit, but big monkey doesn’t let you get near Jackson or Finnley. You both end up on the couch with Skinny.”
I raised an eyebrow. “How did you know that? I barely just thought… Madeline, can you read minds?”
“What? No,” she said, shaking her head. “I don’t know what I can do because I can’t remember. All I know is sometimes I figure out what’s going to happen, or I see scenarios play out.”
Where had I heard that before? I tried to get around her again, but she slid to stop me.
“Nate, stop. You can’t help her right now. She made her choice. All you can do is keep fighting.”
“I was going to fight, but you won’t let me,” I said, folding my arms. Even though she was tiny compared to my frame, she didn’t stand like she was shorter. How was I losing a fight to a five-year-old?
“Fighting means you sit your ass in that corner and pretend to be insane for a bit longer,” she snapped, her language surprising me more than her command. “You wait for the right moment, and then you can fight.”
“How am I supposed to know when the right moment is?” I sat back down, defeated. It was fair, I had no idea what I was getting into and I couldn’t put Finnley, Clara, in more danger.
“The right moment is in one minute and seventeen seconds,” Madeline shrugged, sitting down in front of me. She mimicked Finnley’s rocking.
“Wait, I know that power. Madeline, was your grandmother’s name Jeanie?”
Madeline froze. “How did you know that?”
I didn’t have time to answer when suddenly Glitch appeared in the middle of the room, holding Luci tight. She didn’t look well, a feeling I was familiar with. Traveling with Glitch was a nightmare.
She regained her composure as she spotted me in the corner. “Nate!”
They started to run for me as the monkeys realized what was going on. I jumped off the ground, picking up Madeline with me. I shoved her in Glitch’s arms as soon as they reached me.
“Get her out and come back. Jackson has her.”
Glitch didn’t hesitate, disappearing instantly with Madeline wrapped around his neck. Luci looked bewildered as she watched all the walking comas around her.
“Luci,” I snapped, pulling her out of her trance. I held my hand up to show her the cuff. “I can’t do anything. You have to help.”
The monkeys were getting closer, and they were significantly bigger than Luci and I. If we didn’t get the keys to my cuff soon, we were going
to be toast. Luci had just gotten her powers, and there was no natural light in here to use.
I should have known better than to underestimate a girl’s strength. Luci reached up and used the light from the bulbs above us, concentrating the beams to blind one of the closest monkeys. I saw the keys dangling from his belt, but I didn’t have time to go after them. Big monkey had come out from guarding Finnley, wait, Clara and Jackson. He headed straight for Luci, but I jumped in front just in time to protect her. His foot connected with my gut and sent me sliding back to the corner.
He was on top of me before I had a chance to find any more pens Finnley, no Clara, no Finnley had hidden. I scrambled to grab a piece of splintered wood but his fingers dug into my arm as he lifted me off the ground. Slowly, though, his grip started to weaken and I dropped back down to the ground. I watched him blink, struggling to keep his eyes open before finally crumpling forward. I rolled out of the way as he crashed on top of the mess.
I looked up to see the lunch lady folding her arms. She glared down at the man, four poison needles sticking out of the middle of his back.
“That’s for what you did to my daughter.”
“Wait, Ellie?”
Her face lit up. “You remember me now?”
I jumped up and pulled her into a hug. No wonder she was so excited that Finnley, no Clara, was eating. She was watching her. If Finnley had just gone through the line, she would have seen her mother and regained hope. But Ellie had been lost in my mind until now.
Ellie pulled away from me. “Where is she?”
“Jackson has her,” I said, reaching down to pick up big monkey’s keys. I unlocked my cuff and started running toward the office just as Glitch popped in. I tossed the keys to Luci and faced Glitch, not breaking stride. “Office.”
He reached out to grab me and glitched into the office. My insides were twisting, and I wanted to throw up, but I kept my momentum going. I kept running as soon as we landed, changing direction slightly as I slammed into Jackson, knocking him back over the desk. Objects scattered around us as we slid back to the ground.
I landed on top and in a swift movement, I picked up the nearest thing I could find and pressed it into his neck. How perfect that the closest thing to grab was a letter opener. If I had the chance to stick him with something that hurt, I’d take it.
“Give her memories back,” I spit, hovering over his face.
He just smiled under my threat. “You have no leverage over me. You won’t kill me because she’ll never get them back without me. And I’ll never help you.”
I hated that stupid smile. I lifted the dull blade off his neck and swung back, sticking it deep into his thigh. He screamed, grimacing, but still forced a laugh through his heavier breathing. I yanked the blade out and held it back over his neck, smearing blood over him.
“Give her memories back, now,” I ordered. “You’re her uncle, how could you do this to her?”
“Nate?” Glitch spoke loudly from the other side of the room. “I know you’re busy, but something weird’s happening over here…”
I snarled down at Jackson before shifting my knee over his throat, pressing hard to cut off his air. I just needed to check what Glitch wanted. I stuck my head over the desk and saw Finnley curled into the corner, trembling. Glitch kept getting closer, holding out the keys toward her.
“Clara, it’s okay. I just need to get that thing off your wrist.”
Finnley kept scrambling away, but she couldn’t press into the wall any harder. She had no idea who he was, and with everything happening around her, she was too overwhelmed to trust anything. Glitch also didn’t know she was pumped full of who knows how many different drugs to keep her mind confused.
Jackson saw my hesitation and flipped me off of him. He pushed out with his power and created a shield around him, something I had seen Clara do before. He hobbled out the door, but I didn’t follow him. I regretted not killing him immediately because apparently that was becoming a normal thing to do to Finnley’s relatives.
Yikes, keeping track of her name was going to get confusing. I started moving toward her, but made sure to move slowly.
“Dude, I don’t know what I did. She woke up and started freaking out. I just wanted to get that cuff off,” Glitch said, hurt and confused as to why she was ducking away from him.
“It’s okay,” I said, resting my hand on his shoulder. I kneeled down as close as I could get to her without making her feel threatened. “Finnley, it’s Nate.”
“Finnley?” Glitch asked, stunned.
I ignored him as Finnley pulled her head away from her knees just slightly. She made sure it was me before talking.
“I don’t know him. I don’t feel good,” her words slurred as she dug her face back into her legs.
I stood up and took the keys out of Glitch’s hands before gripping him by the shoulders.
“Long story short, she’s super drugged right now. I have my powers back, so I’ll take care of her. Get Luci and Ellie out and I’ll meet you at House.”
He looked at me for a minute, wishing he could ask all the questions running through his head. After a quick glance down at Finnley, he looked back and pulled me into a hug before running out the door.
I sat down beside Finnley as she uncurled. “Finnley, I’m going to get us out of here. Remember when I told you I’d find a way to keep them from taking you? This is that time, but we need to go.”
“I don’t know who he was talking to. He was sad,” she whispered.
She reached out for my hand but hesitated, looking around to see if there was anyone watching to get us in trouble. I sighed and took her hand instead, letting her know it was safe. I felt the power of the Blue Soul run through me, through our connection. She felt it too and relaxed, but had no idea what it meant.
“Hey, it’s okay. He didn’t quite understand what was happening, but you’ll like him. He’s my best friend.” She smiled at that statement and loosened even more. “Now, we need to get out of here. I can do that, but I’m going to have to use my powers.”
Her eyes widened. She was still surprised that I could use the word. But it wasn’t long before she squinted and reached her other hand out to hold my face.
“Your eyes are blue now. Did you change them?” Her face turned red and she pulled her hand away, embarrassed. My heart crumpled, especially because she was in no way capable of following my conversation with the amount of drugs in her system. I tightened my grip on her hand.
“I know. They’re the same color as yours,” I said, sliding closer. “I need you to listen to me right now. I’m going to slide into a shadow, and I’m going to take you with me. It’s a little cold, and it’s dark, but you’re going to be safe. Just hold on to me and I won’t let go of you, okay?”
She nodded as I shifted and wrapped my arms around her. Her grip tightened around my back as I started to move. Once we were out of that place, an actual psych ward by the looks of the building, I was able to find my way to the woods. We weren’t that far from where we had left the Imperium, but it was still a long way to travel in the shadows.
House let us in and creaked wildly, alerting everyone that we had come home. Finnley had passed out in my arms, probably a combination of her fear and the giant gash on the back of her head where big monkey had dropped her. I jumped out of the shadow and landed on her bed, but didn’t let go of her. I know everyone came running in to see us, but I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer.
40
Finnley
I didn’t want to wake up. I hadn’t had a nightmare, but I just slept well for the first time in… actually, I don’t know how long it had been. It was wonderful and buzzing and warm. No, the buzzing was coming from the arms wrapped around me. They were kind and comforting and I just wanted to be closer.
There was a deep sigh from the chest pressed against mine and I forced myself to open my eyes. Nate was sleeping, still keeping a tight grip on me even though he wasn’t aware.
�
�No, no, no,” I whispered. “The monkeys, no.”
They were going to see us. My heart started to pick up, but Nate’s grip kept me from moving around or seeing much besides him. We weren’t in that place anymore, but I didn’t know where we had gone. I didn’t know Nate, even now. My lungs were shrinking and my breath left me.
Nate jolted awake as I gasped for air. I wanted to push away, but he just held me closer. I wriggled out of his grip and pushed away, sitting up to gasp for air. But I knew where we were. Why were we in my runaway house? How did Nate know about this place?
My head was starting to hurt, and I felt sick to my stomach. I wrung my hands together and felt the cuff still on my wrist. My heart picked up again, and I felt my body start to shake. I was still a prisoner, and somehow Nate was involved.
