Tatum had always wanted to travel. To take vacations. There just hadn’t been any money.
Or rather, he’d been too focused on her future to spend the money he’d put aside for her. Like he’d said, he’d made some mistakes.
“I’m not a little kid anymore. I don’t need to be carted around to museums.”
She’d come around. Once she talked to Thomas. And Talia. And...
“You cut Talia out of the family when you found out what she was doing with her life.”
“I―” He’d been about to tell her how he’d spent thirty thousand dollars to get Talia away from Donald, a rich john who’d married her one night at a Vegas all-night chapel. Donald had seen her as an investment, intending to share her with his friends. For profit. Tanner stopped himself. Tatum already thought he’d bought Talia off.
“Even before that, you had her boyfriend sent to prison so that he couldn’t get to her.”
“He’d committed a crime.” He didn’t know how much Talia had told Tatum about Rex.
“Statutory rape. When she was sixteen. That’s stretching it.”
“I told you I made some mistakes.” He almost choked on his pizza.
“Maybe you should tell her.”
“I think you’ll find, when you speak with your sister, that she and I are good.”
“Because you bought her off.”
Good God, he’d raised a girl who could hold her own, exactly like he’d set out to do. He’d just never considered, for one second, that she’d be using it against him.
“And what about Melissa Winchell?”
Talia’s best friend who’d come by the farm for a while after Talia had run away.
“What about her?”
“You ran her off, too.”
He’d had no idea Tatum even remembered Melissa. Or cared.
“She wanted there to be more between us than was there, Tatum. She said she was in love with me. I wasn’t in love with her. She went off to college, fell in love and she’s married with a little girl now.”
“How do you know that? Did Talia tell you?”
“No, Melissa told me. We were invited to her wedding but it was the weekend you were in the state spelling bee.”
“You could have told me.”
Which reminded him of another thing they had to talk about.
“Sedona told me you know about my GED application. She said she told you why I quit school.”
“Yeah, so what.”
Sedona had told him about the conversation she’d had with Tatum, just before they’d ended up in bed together. She’d said when they were on their way back from Lynn’s office, Tatum had asked her if she’d told him about Tatum’s snooping in his desk. And when Tatum found out that he knew, she’d wanted to know what he said.
Sedona had apologized for giving her client information that hadn’t technically been hers to give. And had used the incident as proof that the two of them could not make love again.
Right before she’d hugged him.
And then they’d had sex.
“I should have told you myself,” he said now. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want any of you—Thomas or Talia or you—to feel like you were responsible. Or feel guilty. The choice to leave school was mine and I was good with it.” He could leave it there. He considered doing so. But coddling hadn’t served any of his siblings. “I also didn’t want any of you to know because I didn’t want to set an example of how someone could quit high school and still be a success in life.”
He was going to end there. But Tatum was chewing slowly. Drinking her tea. And listening. So he told her about Tammy. About how she’d had plans to go to college, to be different from her mother, until Tanner came along and she was dumped by Tanner’s father and had to quit school.
And he told her that their mother had passed away.
She shrugged. “I didn’t really know her. But I’m glad that she’s off the streets and not having to do drugs anymore.”
Poor Tammy. Four children and not one of them mourned her death.
Tatum helped herself to another bite of pizza.
When that was gone, she wiped her mouth and put her napkin on her plate.
“Did you get it?”
“What?”
“The GED?”
“Yes.”
“I really couldn’t care less.”
All in all, Tanner figured the dinner went pretty well.
* * *
SEDONA DIDN’T SLEEP Monday night. She tried. And then she gave up and sat out on her balcony, listening to waves she couldn’t see, feeling emotions she didn’t understand. She’d slept with Tanner twice.
There was no reason to feel as though his betrayal had sucked the life out of her.
And she knew other clients better than she knew Tatum. Had lost a case even more heart-wrenching than Tatum’s. But it had been work. A job. She’d mourned. And she’d been able to move on.
By Tuesday morning, her head felt twice its normal size and encased in thick cotton. When she should have been in the shower and then on the way to her office, she was in bed, having taken an aspirin, sleeping off the night before.
She had no idea what time it was when her phone rang. Shooting straight up in a room flooded with sunshine, she grabbed the cell phone off her nightstand, not remembering when she’d put it there.
“Hello?”
“Sedona?”
She recognized the voice immediately. Throwing off the covers, Sedona stood, forcing her weary mind awake. “Tatum? Where are you?”
“I’m at school. I finished my exam early. Tanner’s going to be here soon so I don’t have long.”
“How are you?”
“Fine.”
Okay. Good. She’d known Tanner wouldn’t hurt her, but she hadn’t expected him to take Tatum, either, and, oh, God, she loved them. Loved them both.
Through the fog in her mind, Sedona stood in her room, wearing a nightgown in the middle of the day, completely poleaxed. How was it possible? She’d only known them a matter of weeks and...
“I just need to know...now that I’m not at The Lemonade Stand, does that mean you’re not my lawyer anymore? Since I got you free because of them and―”
“No! I’m your lawyer as long as you want me,” she said. Unless her brother expressly told her she couldn’t be. And if he did, she’d figure out another way to help them.
“Okay, good.” Tatum sounded rushed.
“Did you need something today?”
“No. I just...I’m glad you’re still on my case. I have to go. Tanner’s going to be here and I don’t want him to see me on the phone and ask who I’m talking to.”
“Call if you need me.”
“I will.”
“Doesn’t matter what time it is.”
“Okay, Sedona. Thank you.” The sweet voice told her goodbye.
And Sedona started to shake.
She was in love with Tanner Malone. A man who trusted no one but himself. A man who could never give her the once-in-a-lifetime, all-consuming relationship she’d been waiting her whole life to find.
Wanting to climb back into bed, Sedona got in the shower instead.
Her entire world had shattered.
And the only thing she could think of to do was get back to work.
* * *
TANNER SPENT ALL day Tuesday working on the in-ground irrigation system for the sod that was going to be delivered the next day. Tatum hadn’t said a word about the porch or the flowers—either the previous afternoon when he’d brought her home or that morning when they’d left for school.
But she had to have noticed.
And he figured she’d liked them because she sure as hell wouldn’t have missed the
opportunity to tell him that she didn’t.
He had pruning to do. And would get to that, too. But the sod came first. Then he was going to have to return Sedona’s calls and texts. He just wasn’t sure what he was going to say.
“You’re fired. Stay away from us,” might be the best option.
He took a deep breath. Waiting for the emotion to pass.
It was the longest breath he’d ever taken. Forty-eight hours and counting. Hard to believe it had been that long since he’d spoken to her. Touched her.
His skin still burned from her tenderness.
His tongue still tasted her.
But she stood between him and Tatum—keeping Tatum locked up in that shelter where he couldn’t help her. Where they couldn’t work on repairing the damage between them.
One thing was for certain. Tatum held a load of misconceptions where he was concerned.
And they hadn’t been built in just the two months since she’d met Harcourt. Apparently they’d been festering for years. Because his silences had left her to draw her own conclusions. About so many things.
Apparently he should have been a hell of a lot more open than he’d been. With all three of his siblings.
But silence protected them. From all of the things he’d known and seen and dealt with so they didn’t have to. He’d spent his life shielding them from the ugly things in life as much as he could. When he hadn’t been able to get them away from Tammy’s home, he’d at least been able to block them from seeing much of what went on there.
He’d been the wall between his younger sisters and brother and the hell their mother had borne them into.
That was his purpose.
As he dug thin trenches in the hard dirt, sweat dripping down his body and into the earth, and laid the thin black tubing, Tanner had to accept the fact that he’d driven his baby sister away.
And Sedona...was he driving her away, too? The woman was different. The feelings she roused in him—he didn’t recognize them. Didn’t understand them.
They made him uncomfortable.
She made him soar.
He dug. He sweat. Why in the hell was he thinking about love?
Or the idea that he had one chance at it?
Tanner finished laying his tubes. He did the final leak checks. Turned on the water and walked the entire yard, looking for leaks. He fixed a couple.
And knew that the hard day’s work was nothing compared to what lay ahead of him. He had half an hour before he was due to collect Tatum from school.
Pulling out his cell phone, he got in the truck, parked half a block from the school and dialed Talia’s number.
“I have something to tell you,” he said the second his sister picked up.
“She’s home, right?” He’d told her the day before, when he’d called to tell her about Tammy, that he was going to get Tatum.
“Yes, but this isn’t about Tatum.”
“What, then?” Her voice changing, she added, “What’s wrong, Tanner? You don’t sound good.”
He heard real fear in her voice. As though he mattered to her.
And he wondered how long it had been since she’d expressed that caring so freely. Or even allowed herself to acknowledge that the feeling was there.
Allowed herself to feel.
Like he allowed himself to feel?
Thoughts attacked him with swift force. He couldn’t feel. He had to be the strong one. The one in control.
God knew, Tammy hadn’t been.
He had to tell her the whole truth.
“The way I reacted about Rex Chelshire.” He came close to blurting out the words.
“What about him?” Her voice dropped.
“He was your teacher, Tal. It didn’t matter if I pressed charges or not, the school was going to. I told you that.”
“I didn’t believe you then. But even when I got a little older and realized you were right on that score, I still blamed you. Think about it, Tanner. After Mom left, you watched me like a hawk. With all your questions, and the way you warned off anyone who dared to come near me. You drove away every boy I knew, every boy my own age, or even close to my own age. You were crazy, Tanner. If you’d let me date like a normal teenager I wouldn’t have had to...” Her voice drifted off. And he didn’t want to remember.
“I know.” Would it have made a difference to her if he’d told her why he’d done so? Would she have understood? “You’re right. I was crazy.”
“Why, Tanner? Because you knew that I was like Tammy? Did you see something in me? Some sign?”
That was what she thought?
If ever Tanner had needed a lesson in understanding why keeping secrets was sometimes as harmful as lying, he’d just had it. As it occurred to him that sometimes secrets were only safe when they were shared, he told his sister why their mother had left their home and never come back.
He told her about the man outside the bathroom door while Talia had been in the shower, a man who, after getting out of bed with Tammy, had handed their mother a hundred-dollar bill to get in the shower with her daughter.
He told her about beating the guy to a pulp before throwing him out of their home. About how that incident had opened his eyes to the danger Talia’s beauty was to her. And how he’d spent every single second of every day after that worrying that someone else was going to take advantage of the beautiful sister he’d sworn to protect.
He’d panicked. Hadn’t known how to protect her. And when Talia started to cry, he hung on to the phone and wished he could change so many things.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
TANNER’S PHONE CALLS weren’t done. Still fifteen minutes from exams being over, he sat in his truck on a lonely stretch of tree-lined road. He knew the ocean was on the other side of the trees. He just couldn’t see it.
Branches overhead shaded him from the hot sun. With his windows rolled up, there was no breeze in the car.
He dialed his last missed call.
“Hello?” She knew who it was. She was using her courtroom voice.
She’d judged him.
Probably sentenced him, too.
“I need your help.”
“What can I do for you?” Her tone had softened. Not a lot, but he noticed.
“I’m on my way to pick Tatum up from school. I’d like you to call and make arrangements for her readmittance to The Lemonade Stand.”
“What?” No doubting the change now.
He didn’t kid himself that her warmth was directed at him. He’d lied to her, telling her that he’d leave Tatum at The Stand when he had no intention of doing so. He’d betrayed her even as he was making love to her.
“I’ll take her home and let her pack up whatever she wants. I could have her there within the next couple of hours. If you can make that work...” She was Tatum’s attorney. He’d send her a check even if she didn’t bill him.
“Wait.” The word was spoken as a command, not a favor. “What happened?”
He wasn’t sure if he heard a “what have you done” in there, or not.
“I’ve come to my senses,” he said. Living with Tammy had taught him to hide. And by doing so, he’d hurt everyone he loved. She was gone now and he wasn’t going to be the one to keep her alive. “I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but I love my sister. I want what’s best for her. She wants to be at the shelter. You and Lila and Sara think it’s best for her.”
“I think that Tatum needs help, Tanner. I have no idea what’s best for her or I’d be doing what I could to make it happen.”
“I’ve never hit her.”
“I know that.”
“But she doesn’t trust me at all anymore. And I can’t believe it’s just the GED. I can see where it was a shock to her. I can understand her feeling betra
yed. But the things coming out of her mouth last night at dinner...there’s something more going on. I don’t know what it is. But I’m fairly certain that as long as she feels trapped in that house with me, we aren’t going to find out.”
“Maybe with Talia coming home...”
“I don’t think so.”
“When is she due?”
“Next week. She’s just finishing her final exams.”
“Maybe when she gets here Tatum will talk to her.”
“She thinks I’ve bought Talia off.”
“She said that to you?”
“Yes.”
“That doesn’t sound like Tatum. She’s clearly upset with you, I’ll admit that, but from what I understood, she wanted you to lift her ban on talking to Talia.”
“I told her we’d take a new look at the house rules, choose them together. She wasn’t interested. Right now, nothing I do is going to be right.”
It was incredibly painful to admit. And deep breaths weren’t taking the pain away.
“If it was just Harcourt manipulating her, I’d think that your concessions would weaken his hold on her. She’s still a kid in so many ways and it was pretty clear to me and to my parents and Sara that she loves you very much.”
He’d never doubted Tatum’s love. Until the night before. “I hope you’re right,” he said now, looking toward where he knew the ocean to be. “I have to go pick her up. Do you think you can take her back in this afternoon?”
“I’m certain I can.”
He told her briefly about Tammy’s passing, about Tatum’s reaction to the news.
“How do you feel about it?” she asked. “You were the one who knew her best.”
“I’m glad she’s at peace,” he said, stealing Talia’s words. Peace. His goal for what Tammy had left inside of him was peace.
And maybe, as the news of her death settled more clearly upon him, he was a little sad, too. For the girl she’d been before he’d been conceived. For the mother she’d wanted to be.
“Do you want me to meet you at The Lemonade Stand?” Sedona’s question brought him back to the present. He had business here to take of. The most important business of his life.
Once a Family Page 26
