by Shey Stahl
I don’t say anything because I really do not want Lenny coming over here. I want distance from her. Miles and miles of distance.
“What does ‘Get off my dick’ mean?”
My head flies up from the booth. “What did you say?”
Nova just sighs and points toward Lenny. “I said, what does ‘Get off my dick’ mean?”
Realizing she is talking about Lenny’s shirt, I ask, “When did you learn to read?”
“Uncle Colt’s been teaching me to read.” She shrugs. “What does it mean?”
Fucking Colt. What the hell is he reading to her that she knows how to spell dick?
Here’s the thing. I never taught my kid the proper anatomy. I just didn’t. When she was little and learning she had private parts, she called it her potty. So I went with it. I’m not sure how, but she understood I had something different and called it a tinkle. I wasn’t exactly okay with my kid walking around saying penis and vagina. Don’t ask me why. It just sounded too grown up. So I let it go, and we continued with the potty and tinkle.
I never want the word dick coming out of her mouth again. That’s for sure.
“I don’t know what it means,” I mumble.
Nova shrugs, buying my bullshit excuse.
Just as our pizza arrives, Lenny turns and looks right at me. Probably because she can feel my stare on her ass. I shift further down in the booth away from Nova because of my reaction to the legs. Goddamn, this is awful.
Lenny stares at me and then looks to Nova, who is smiling at her and returns the smile. “What are you doing here?”
“What does it look like?” I gesture to the pizza and beer with a flick of my wrist. I know I’m being mean but damn it, I’m trying to get away from this chick, not spend more time with her. It’s only Monday. Imagine what the rest of the week is going to be like for me.
“Daddy, be nice!” Nova drives her sneaker-covered foot right into my shin.
My glare snaps to hers, and Nova looks pretty fucking pleased with herself. Little shit. She stares up at Lenny and then me. “Who is she?”
“Sorry, this is my daughter, Nova.” I lean forward, rubbing my shin. “Nova, this is Lennon. She works with me now.”
Nova perks up and stands on the seat. “You’re a mechanic? I want to be one but Daddy says no.”
I sigh and turn my head to face her. “You’re five.”
“So what.” Nova raises an eyebrow and stares at me. “That don’t mean I can’t be one. I wanna go to the shop every day, but Daddy says I’m too little, but Uncle Colt says Daddy is just an egotestical jerk.”
Lenny snorts with laughter.
Figures Colt would say that. “It’s egotistical… and for the last time, Nova, that man is not your uncle.”
She rolls her eyes and turns her body toward Lenny. “Can you sit with us?”
With the way Lenny looks at me, and then Nova, I can tell she’s completely fucking amused that a five-year-old rules my life.
“Sit with us,” Nova says again, patting the seat.
Lenny’s eyes snap to mine as if she thinks I’m going to tell her to get lost. Though I want to, I can’t because Nova will more than likely start freaking crying if I do.
“No, that’s okay. It looks like you and your daddy are having a nice dinner together,” she says, and then the kid behind the counter calls out her order number.
Nova turns to me giving me a look that says fix this.
I shift to signal the cashier to drop her pizza at our table then turn back to Lenny. “Come on now, don’t piss off the child,” I tell her, scooting Nova toward me so Lenny has a place to sit. “Just sit down.”
She ruffles Nova’s soft curls. “Since you asked so nicely, pretty girl.” And then she glares at me. Fucking glares at me.
“I like your nails. Your hair is so pretty!”
“Your hair is pretty. I love the curls.” Lenny looks at me, eyes wide, probably unsure what question to answer first, or if she should.
“She’s a lot to take in.” I keep my eyes on the beer and pizza, only because I can’t make eye contact with her and not get hard. It’s not ideal with my kid sitting here. Thank God I’m sitting down.
Lenny’s lips press against the glass as she takes a drink, her tongue darting out to lick her bottom lip when she pulls the glass away. I shake my head, mentally telling myself to stop thinking about her this way. Especially with my kid sitting beside me.
Nova’s face rumples with confusion as she picks at the slice of pizza in front of her. “Why is it called pizza?”
“No idea,” I tell her, watching Lenny’s reaction when Nova takes a bite too large for her mouth and tries to chew it.
“Lenny?” Nova looks over at her, wiping pizza sauce from her face with the swipe of her forearm. “Do you like working for my daddy?”
You can clearly read the answer on Lenny’s face. Lucky for me, Nova isn’t so good at reading emotions just yet. Give her a year or two. “Um, well, I’ve only been there a day and everyone was very… welcoming.” Her voice drips sarcasm with each word. Also something Nova hasn’t picked up on… yet.
For twenty minutes, Nova asks her questions, all fairly juvenile in a sense, but then she asks, “Do you have a boyfriend?”
Suddenly I’m all ears, like it fucking matters if she has one or not. Lenny’s face goes blank as she finishes her beer. “No boyfriend, sweetie.” She stands from her seat ruffling Nova’s hair. “Thanks for letting me sit with you. I have to go now.”
To my complete surprise, Nova hugs her good-bye. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen her do that to anybody but family, or Colt.
As I’m watching this, Lenny’s eyes drift to mine. “See you tomorrow.”
I nod, offer a half smile and she’s gone.
And I’m watching her ass as she walks away.
“DADDY, WHAT DOES that tattoo say?” Nova asks when I take my shirt off after being soaked by her splashing in the tub.
I point to my bare chest to the tattoo over my heart. “This one?”
“Yeah.”
She can read the words “Get off my dick” but she can’t read heaven?
“It says heaven. Mommy’s name spelled backward is heaven.” I reach for the cup on the floor to rinse the soap from her hair. “It was for her.”
She takes two horses and sets them on the edge of the tub galloping them across the tile as the soap comes out of her hair. “When did you get it?”
“Not long after we got married. She always thought it was stupid to tattoo someone’s name on your body, so I did that.”
“Did she like it?”
I smile, remembering her crying when she saw it for the first time. “I think so.”
“Did Mommy have tattoos?”
“She had birds on her collarbone.”
“Is Mommy in heaven?”
“Yeah, she is.”
“With Papa, right?”
“Yep.”
“Do you think Mommy misses me?”
Nova’s smile and the weight of her words hit me like a ton of bricks, bringing me back to reality. “I’m sure she does. She’s always with you, though. Mommy’s an angel now.”
Her eyes light up. “I wonder if she knows the tooth fairy.” Crazy kid believes in the tooth fairy, just not Santa Clause apparently.
“I bet she does.”
“How did you come up with my name?”
Because you were conceived in the backseat of my car on a backroad. “Mommy liked it.”
“Kale said it’s a weird name.”
“Yeah, well, he’s named after a weed. Don’t let him tease you.”
There’s a problem with sleeping in your truck with an open back.
Bugs.
I have some many mosquito bites and spend most of the night itching them. It’s like I’ve been eaten alive. I’ve been sleeping in my truck for the last week or so since I left Oklahoma, and I’ll admit, it’s not so bad. Minus the bugs.
Tap. Tap. Ta
p.
“Ma’am?” someone asks.
Fuck.
Groaning, I peel my coat from my face, the pale blue painted sky a little too bright. I knew I couldn’t stay in my car forever.
“Howdy, Sheriff.”
The sheriff scratches the side of his dark hair that’s graying at the temples. “You can’t stay here, Ms. Reeves.”
I sit silently, my impending sense of loss in this life I have now revealed by my blank stare, and then say, “Okay.”
He shifts his stance and puts his night stick away. “I didn’t mean to scare you, but you can’t sleep here.”
“I’m sorry,” I say, beginning to get nervous. “I’ll move.”
“You know, you’re not allowed to sleep in your car.” Though he is basically telling me to get lost, his tone is patient. “Doesn’t matter where you park it. Do you need a place to stay?”
I know you can sleep in your car. I’ve done it on and off for twenty-three years. “I’m sorry. I’m staying with a friend.”
He looks at me and knows I’m lying. He stares at me, and I wonder, when our eyes meet if he knows the reason I’m out here, sleeping in a parking lot and showering at a truck stop with a butch woman. “You’ve been in this parking lot for two nights.”
I don’t say anything. I probably shouldn’t lie to the police. The last thing I need is trouble here.
“You’re working for Red, right?”
More like I’m a prisoner to him. Believe me, the thought of being tied to a bed for him is real. Especially after seeing him with his daughter.
I swallow back the dryness in my mouth, wishing I had a bottle of water in here. “Yeah, just started there about a week ago. How did you know?”
“It’s a small town, honey. People talk.”
My eyes go wide. If people are talking, what does that mean? I know they’re curious about me. I get a constant stare wherever I go.
“Listen, if you need a place to stay, my wife and I have an extra room above our garage… or I’m sure the church could set you up with something.”
Living with the police? Nope. Not a good idea.
I reach forward and put my keys in the ignition, waving him off with my other hand. “Thank you, but that’s all right. I really do have a place to stay.”
I breathe a sigh of relief when he leaves, his patrol car passing by as he nods to me. It’s then I realize I’m running late this morning, and I know Red will have my ass if I’m late.
I’d gladly give him my ass.
Oh, stop.
And then I think of Red, all manly beastly smoking hot Red, and I want to punch myself for thinking of my boss like that. He hasn’t been nice to me once since I started at Walker Automotive. The most civilized conversation I had was with his daughter.
I didn’t quit my job, surprisingly. I went back to work and made it an entire week there and hadn’t been fired yet. I tend to think it’s only because he wants someone to do all the jobs he don’t want to do.
I wonder why I don’t quit, and then I’m quickly reminded that I need money. I also have no place to live, and the last thing I want is to go back to Oklahoma.
There’s no way that I want Red to see me as some chick trying to hang with the boys. I want him to see me as something more. Strangely, I want him to know me and not the person I pretend to be. The person I am deep down. The person no one but Tyler has ever seen.
As I pull into work, about twenty minutes late, Red’s in the parking lot talking to a customer. He doesn’t even look my way.
When I’m inside the shop, Daniel, the lube tech, nods to me. For the past week, he’s been awfully flirty. If I didn’t know any better, he was looking for a one-night stand. He’s not bad looking, but he’s got this greasy hair that just looks gross. And he’s shorter than me, and that’s a no go in my book.
“How’d you get the name Lennon?” he asks, sipping what I think is coffee from a stainless steel mug.
“Mom was a stripper,” I tell him, shrugging and keeping one eye on Red in the parking lot. I’m teasing him because my mom gave me up. I don’t know a damn thing about her, other than she’s dead. “Apparently she couldn’t come up with anything better… like Danielle.”
Daniel’s face goes blank, as though he’s trying to decide what I meant by that remark.
“Why are you late?” Red asks the moment he enters the shop. He’s wearing a black shirt today, and I don’t like it when he wears the black one because it makes his eyes look even darker.
“Sorry, it won’t happen again.”
“I didn’t ask for an apology. I asked why.”
I inhale a deep breath, trying to summon the courage to deal with him today. “I’m just late.” I want to sound indignant and hostile, but my voice cracks, and I have to clear my throat to regain my composure around him. It’s none of his business that I had to fight for the shower with the butch lady again and kick her out twice.
His brown eyes search mine intently. “Why?” he presses.
“I’m just late,” I say again.
He reaches into his pocket, digs out a piece of paper and hands it to me.
Glancing down, I look at it, and it’s a donut and coffee order. “What’s this?”
“What does it look like?”
“It looks like a food order.”
Turning his head in my direction, he eyes me up and down. “Congratulation, you can read, so I suggest you go get it.”
“So now I run errands?”
“You do when you show up late.”
I stare at the order and my determination begins to wilt under his quick dismissal. “Where’s this place at?”
He flips his hand at the door. “Down the street about a mile. Turn left at the stop light. It’s on your right.”
Easy enough.
Not exactly. After two wrong turns, I finally find it and hand the girl at the window my list. I’m not sure, but maybe she can tell by the writing when she smiles at me.
“You work for Red? I’m Jessie. You must be the new girl, right?”
Is there nothing else to talk about in this town besides the new girl in town?
“I guess I must. I’m Lenny.”
She gets this dreamy look about her. I’ve seen it before. Usually in teenage girls which this girl probably isn’t far from. “How do you like working for Red?”
“Yeah.” I snort. “It’s great if you like working for an asshole.” And then my eyes snap to hers, and I realize what I just did. I called him an asshole out loud.
“I would take working for that asshole anytime.”
“He’s not bad to look at, but believe me. That’s where it ends.”
“If you’ve ever seen him with Nova, you’d understand. He knows how to work the single father thing.” She makes a clicking sound with her tongue. “Sexy.”
What is with this chick? “Yeah, well, I’m not really interested in that. His personal life is none of my business.”
“Sure, Lenny.” And then she rolls her damn eyes at me.
“IT’S ABOUT time.” That’s how I’m greeted after going to get him coffee and donuts. You’d think he’d be nicer considering it’s a very real possibility that I’ve spit in his cup. I’ve thought about it. I even thought about licking the lid. I may, or may not have done that last part.
“Sorry it took so long… I met one of your admirers.”
Red doesn’t look at me, he only squints and keeps his attention on the coffee I hand him that says Red on the cup with a heart. “Jessie?”
“Yeah. The chick that decorated your cup so pretty.”
Don’t worry, I licked the lid. She didn’t.
“She’s a nice kid.”
I point to the parking lot and the lady with the Lexus pulling in, leaning against his toolbox. “You know, you’re a popular guy in this town. You have quite the harem, don’t you?”
He laughs cynically and crosses his arms across his broad chest. “You don’t know a damn thing about me.” And the
n he walks outside to meet the lady, coffee in hand.
I still have five more coffees on my tray, and I set mine on Red’s toolbox because I don’t have a toolbox and nowhere to put anything. Hell, my keys are tucked inside my bra.
I give the coffee marked C-man to Colt, assuming that’s him, and he immediately takes the lid off and pours whatever it is in his flask, into the coffee. “Thanks, sweetheart. I needed a good mixer.”
Shaking my head, I smile at him and keep walking down to the other end of the shop
Balancing the cardboard tray of coffee, I hand Tyler his coffee. “Hey.” He smiles, taking it from me. “Why were you late?”
“I had a battle with the butch lady at the truck stop for the shower. She already has my panties. Greedy bitch.”
He stares at me, and then shakes his head. “Are you living in your bronco?”
“I know I said I had a place to stay… but I don’t.”
“Lenny,” he sighs. “Damn it. Where have you been staying?”
“In my car.”
He shakes his head and dips his brows in concern. “That’s not okay. You’re staying with me from now on.”
“Do you have a washing machine?”
“Yeah….”
I pat his shoulder. “Good, because I gave my panties to a hobo the other night and I’m running out of clean clothes.”
His smile turns up a notch. “You fit in perfectly around here.”
“IT’S RUNNING LIKE shit, and I can’t find anything wrong with it.” I’m standing beside Red, my skin heated from being this close as he and Tyler contemplate why a Chevy Blazer was brought in for an oil change yesterday and then came back today.
Red stares at the car, twisting a wrench around in his hand like it’s a nervous habit he has. “And you checked the oil?”
Tyler shakes his head. “No, I will.”
Everyone comes to Red with questions, and he doesn’t seem to get much of anything done during the day. As Tyler stands in his stall, the two of them going over a car neither can figure out, Daniel walks up to him and tells him a customer is waiting.
