by Coleen Kwan
“Just like that? Must have been quite an epiphany.”
Not quite as miraculous as that. He’d omitted a few pertinent details. Like the fact that a few days after the meltdown with his dad he’d raced down to Sydney to see Toni, his heart and head in turmoil. He’d wanted to tell her so many things, had wanted to spill out so many confused emotions. He’d missed her, missed having her in his life, and he’d been confident she felt the same about him. Vague plans had boiled in his mind. He’d move to Sydney and while she studied he’d find a job somewhere as a kitchen hand or apprentice cook. Didn’t matter what kind of job, as long as he could be with her.
When he’d spied her making out with Nick, all those wild plans had crashed and burned. He’d turned round and driven straight back to Piper Bay in shock. Toni hadn’t missed him after all. She’d been building a new life for herself which didn’t include him. She was happy, ecstatic even with that boyfriend of hers, and she didn’t need a loser friend latching onto her like a leech.
If the confrontation with his father had been a rude wake-up call, then witnessing Toni with Nick had been the extra punch in the teeth he’d needed. In hindsight Nick had done him a favour; stopped him from throwing himself on Toni and demanding she rescue him. No-one could save him except himself, he knew that now. But at the time it had felt as if he’d taken a bungy jump and forgotten the safety harness.
Now, Toni gazed at him, her expression troubled. “I wish I’d known. I wish you’d told me.” A note of accusation lurked beneath her words.
“Hey, you weren’t exactly around, remember? By that stage you weren’t coming up to Piper Bay very often.”
She blushed and nodded. They both knew she’d been too wrapped up with Nick to bother about anything else. “I know. Still, I wish you’d confided in me.”
He exhaled slowly, thinking of all the different paths their lives might have followed. “And I wish you’d confided in me when you started having problems with Nick.”
Twisting her fingers, she gave a deprecating laugh. “To be honest, I was too ashamed. Who wants to admit their marriage is in trouble and so soon? I thought it better to put on a brave act for everyone.”
“I’m not everyone, Toni.”
She gazed at him for a long time. “No, you’re not. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” Reaching out, she brushed her fingers over his hand which rested on the bench between them. “You and I used to be so close. I – I don’t know why we drifted apart, but I want us to be what we were before. Don’t you?”
He didn’t want them to be the way they were before. That wasn’t enough any more. But she was touching him, and he couldn’t resist curling his fingers through hers and holding onto her. “Yeah, of course,” he muttered.
The corners of her lips edged up. “So, no more secrets?”
He tightened his fingers around hers. Heat thudded beneath his skin so hot he was surprised she didn’t notice. The dimness of the beer garden and the humid night air pulled them closer. He’d stopped noticing what was going on around them. All he could focus on was this woman, this childhood friend who should have been as familiar to him as his old teddy bear but was instead an alluring enigma who scrambled all his senses.
“No more secrets,” he replied, his voice husky as he lied to her.
“Good.”
A moment’s pause. Then, it seemed the most natural thing in the world to embrace her, and as he did so he felt her arms wrap around his waist. Immediately his senses were flooded – her scent, her ink-silk hair, her thigh rubbing against his, her breasts pressed up on his chest, her moist breath feathering his jaw. All his pent up fantasies boiled over in an explosion of sensory overload. Her breath grew warmer. When her lips skated over his cheek, fire streaked from his face straight to his groin. Twisting his neck, he angled his mouth down squarely onto hers.
He heard her swift intake of breath. She froze but didn’t pull away as he’d half-feared. He deepened the kiss, and a second later she began to respond. Astonishment shattered through him, quickly chased away by need as he kissed her hungrily. How long had he imagined this kiss? Now it was happening, and it was hotter and juicier than anything he could have made up. He folded one arm tight around her waist. With his other hand he threaded his fingers through her smooth hair, revelling in its fineness before cupping the side of her cheek, his thumb caressing her jaw. She was satin and fire in his arms, and he never wanted to let go of her. But just as her lips began to part and he was ready to explore her mouth with his tongue, she broke off the kiss, and it felt like someone had yanked out his power cord.
Dumb-struck, he stared at her, aware of his panting and the uncomfortable bulge in his trousers. Her hair stuck to her cheeks, and she was huffing just as hard as he, her lips parted and rosy from their kissing.
“Dion–” She gulped and shuffled away from him. “Uh, what just happened?”
He sucked in some oxygen. Should he tell her that he’d been fantasising about her for years and that since she’d arrived he couldn’t stop thinking about getting her naked every time she got near him? No, that would be guaranteed to make her run a mile. Better to keep it cool and not creep her out.
“Last time I checked we’re two single, consenting adults,” he said, forcing himself to keep still. “We’re allowed to kiss.”
“Yes, but that–” She pressed her fingertips against her lips as if she could still feel the kiss. “That felt wrong.”
“Oh? How can I improve the next time?”
“The next time?”
“It didn’t feel wrong to me. It felt pretty damn good.” He reached for her and pushed his fingers through her hair, lifting the heavy mass off her shoulders. How fantastic she’d look naked with all that black shiny hair spilling over her breasts. Cradling the back of her head in his palm, he kissed her again, this time making sure it was light and teasing. When she didn’t resist, he flicked the tip of his tongue over the seam of her lips and was rewarded by a small tremor running through her body. “Was that better?” he asked as he lifted his head.
For a while she seemed too dazed to speak. Eventually she swallowed and said, “This is crazy. You and I, we’re friends.”
“Friends can’t make out?”
“You make it sound so – so natural.”
“It is natural.”
“No, it’s not. Not for me. I don’t go round pashing my male friends.” She jumped to her feet and turned away to stare out blindly at the trees, all the while rubbing her upper arms as if it was freezing, despite the muggy night.
Slowly he rose and stood close behind her. Every muscle in his body ached with the strain of reining in his emotions and denying his need to touch her, but instinct told him not to push her too far so he made himself remain silent.
“Dion, you’re a very attractive man,” she began, her face still averted.
Uh-oh, that didn’t sound too promising.
“You’ve had heaps of girlfriends,” she continued.
None of them were serious, he wanted to say.
“I don’t want to be another of your ex-girlfriends.” She turned to face him. “I don’t want to lose what we have just for the sake of – of a few kisses. You’re too important to me.”
And she had no idea just how important she was to him. “Toni, you’re not going to lose me.”
“You say that now because you’re thinking with your penis and not your brain.”
“I’ve always been told I’m a clever dick.”
She folded her arms and glared at him. “It’s wonderful that you can just live in the moment and not bother about the future, but I can’t.”
“Well, gee, thanks for pointing out my faults for me.”
“I didn’t mean it that way!” Her face crumpled a little. “Dion, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to criticise you, but you’ve really taken me by surprise here. I never thought you, uh, wanted to kiss me.”
His irritation melted away. If she only knew how long he’d wanted to kiss her. �
�You’re a beautiful person and gorgeous as well. Of course I want to kiss you.” He paused then added, “And you would’ve kissed me last night if your mum hadn’t interrupted.”
Her blush gave her away before she groaned. “Oh God, my parents. Your parents. They mustn’t find out we kissed.”
“We’re not even cousins. What’s the big deal?”
“You can’t guess?” Looking sick, she pressed her fingers against her temples. “I couldn’t face the third degree from my mum. Promise me you won’t tell anyone.”
“I guess you’ve got a point,” he conceded. “I mean, given how close our families are, it’s kind of surprising how they’ve never hinted you and I should get together.” He paused as an awkward thought struck him. “Er, that’s to say my parents have never hinted. I don’t know about yours.”
“Not mine. They’ve never tried to meddle in my relationships, but I’m sure they’d have something to say about us.”
Maybe she was worried her parents would be all for it and she didn’t need the extra pressure. Neither did he. Things between him and Toni were finely balanced here, and the last thing he needed was for their parents to start interfering.
“I won’t tell anyone,” he said, placing his hands on her shoulders. “It’ll be our little secret.”
He leaned in, hoping to kiss her again, but she stepped back with a sigh. “It won’t be a secret for long if we stay out here any longer. Let’s get back to the others before they come looking for us.”
“Okay,” he sighed as well.
He couldn’t resist pressing his palm in the small of her back as he ushered her back inside but dropped his hand as they approached the table. Melissa’s head sagged against Gary’s shoulder, her mouth slack, while Gary looked resigned at having her drool on his shirt. Ronan had deserted them and was chatting up a young woman at the bar.
Gary brightened at the sight of them. “Thank God you’re back.” Carefully tipping Melissa back onto her chair, he heaved to his feet, already fishing for his car keys. “Can I leave you with her?” he asked Dion. “I’m heading home.”
“Sure, I’ll get her home.” As Gary ducked out the bar at top speed, Dion grimaced at the sight of Melissa’s slumped form. She must have had a few vodkas. She never could handle them.
“Come on,” Toni said. “I’ll help you.”
Together they got Melissa to his SUV where she collapsed on the back seat. “She lives over in Medowie,” he said to Toni as they drove off.
“That’s a fair distance away. You’d best drop me off first.”
He’d been looking forward to having her alone with him in the car. It would have been the perfect opportunity to kiss her a few more times, but he realised that wasn’t going to happen. Not only would he have to drive Melissa all the way back, but he’d also have to carry her up to her apartment and put her to bed. Looking after his sozzled ex-girlfriend was hardly the right lead up to a romantic kiss.
“I’m going kayaking tomorrow,” he said as they pulled up outside her parents’ house. “Come with me. I’ve got a double kayak.”
She eyed him doubtfully. “I’m not sure of my plans tomorrow.”
“I won’t take no for an answer. I’ll pick you up at nine-thirty. Wear your bikini.”
“You’re being very bossy.”
“It’s the new me.”
From the back seat came a groan followed by a noxious burp.
“Fine then.” Toni scrambled out of the car. “I won’t argue with you.”
He watched as she hurried down the path. The sight of her hair swinging down her back made him grin. Tomorrow couldn’t come quick enough for him.
Chapter 5
“Jou sahn, Dad,” Toni greeted her father as she walked into the kitchen the next morning.
“Jou sahn.” Shen looked up from the kitchen table where his tackle box lay open on the table, lures, hooks and sinkers spread out. “Good day for fishing. You want to come with me? You used to like going fishing with me when you were little.”
“Uh, sorry, Dad. I’m going out kayaking with Dion.”
“When?”
“Soon. He’s coming to pick me up.” She tugged at the hem of her cotton T-shirt, wishing she didn’t feel so guilty in front of her dad. “I can go fishing with you later this afternoon,” she added.
“I have golf lesson this afternoon.” Shen pursed his lips. “Don’t spend too long with Dion.”
Her heart jumped. Surely he didn’t know what she and Dion had done last night? “What do you mean?”
“He got plenty work at restaurant. Last night he do well, but every night he must do well. You make him too tired, he forget things.”
“I – I won’t tire him out.”
Her father’s expression remained stern. “You here on holiday, but not Dion. He has an important job. Remember that.”
“Sure, Dad.”
When she heard Dion’s SUV pulling into the driveway, she flew out of the house with a muttered goodbye, eager to get away from her father.
“You’re in a hurry,” Dion said as she hustled into the passenger seat and motioned for him to drive off.
“My dad’s worried I’ll distract you from the restaurant. Told me not to tire you out.”
Dion chuckled, a glint in his eyes. “I look after my fitness. I’m sure I can keep up with you, whatever you do to me.”
His smile tugged at her, making her curl her toes against the attraction. “Look, we’re just going kayaking, okay? Nothing else.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want?”
As he steered the vehicle round a corner, she caught a glimpse of his torso through the arm hole of his sleeveless T-shirt. The sight of his taut, smooth abdomen did weird things to her breathing, and it only got worse as she drank in the view of his muscular thighs stretching out from his board shorts and his biceps flexing as he manoeuvred the steering wheel. Such a gorgeous body. Coupled with his lazy smile and bedroom eyes, he was going to be tough to resist.
“Toni?”
His gentle prompt made her aware that she was practically drooling over him like a sex-starved maniac. Clearing her throat, she muttered, “Yeah, that’s what I want.”
“Okay.” By the way he smiled she knew her blatant lusting hadn’t gone unnoticed. “Maybe you’ll change your mind later.”
She didn’t dare answer that, so she remained silent until they reached the bay. Dion untied the double kayak from the roof of his car and carried it down to the water’s edge, while Toni followed with the paddles. The temperature was already soaring, the sun glittering white over the rippling waters. The beach was filling up with the weekend crowd, while boats of all types and sizes plied across the protected waters.
“Did you remember your bikini and sunscreen?” Dion asked, his gaze travelling over her bare arms and legs revealed by her skimpy T-shirt and shorts.
“Yup. Already on me, and I brought a hat.” She pulled on her baseball cap and threaded her ponytail through the hole at the back. Dion was still studying her legs, not bothering to hide the fact. His ogling set off a zing through her. Shoot, you’d think she’d never attracted a guy’s attention before. But there was something special about Dion’s appreciation, something that made her want even more of it. Pretending she was fixing her hair, she raised her hands behind her head so her T-shirt rose above her belly and stretched tight across her chest. In an instant Dion’s gaze zeroed in on her breasts. Eyes narrowing, he stepped closer and placed his palm against her exposed stomach.
“Looks like you’re changing your mind already,” he said throatily.
The possessive heat of his hand had her senses leaping. Too late she realised she was playing with fire. Hurriedly she dropped her arms to her sides. “Uh, let’s go kayaking.”
His hand lingered on her belly for a few more seconds, the fingertips stroking her skin and confusing her thoughts. Slowly he withdrew his hand. “Whatever you say,” he replied, but his eyes were still burning with promise.
Toni drew the salty air deep into her lungs as she ploughed her paddle through the water. It felt as though she’d left all her problems behind on the shore. They’d be waiting for her when she got back, but for now there was only the simple pleasure of sun and sea. And Dion, too. His presence accentuated her enjoyment. Apart from directing her which way to paddle, he kept largely quiet. This time, the silence between them was restful. They didn’t need to talk. It was enough just to be together.
She wasn’t much of a kayaker, and the past six months she’d been too distracted to exercise often, so it didn’t come as a surprise when, half-an-hour later, her arms felt like limp noodles and her body was bathed in perspiration.
“Want to take a break?” Dion said at that moment.
“You read my mind.” She gave him a rueful smile over her shoulder.
“Actually it was your huffing and puffing that caught my attention. We’ll head over to that beach.” He pointed towards a small crescent of sand curved between two jutting headlands not far from them. “You rest. I’ll get us there.”
She shipped her paddle gratefully and watched on as the kayak slid smoothly over the water. The tide had just peaked, and the beach they landed on was deserted because the rising waters had cut it off from the rest of the shoreline. With rocky cliffs rising above it, the beach was now only accessible by water.
