I’d called Tasha’s brother, but he didn’t know how to locate Ruby. That had only made me angrier, sadder, and more frustrated because I didn’t know where to even begin to find her.
I finally got my gloves off. “Have you attended Greenridge since the ninth grade?”
He stuffed his gear into a sport bag. “Yeah, why?”
“Did you know a girl by the name of Ruby Lewis? She would’ve been a junior when you were a freshman.”
“No, sorry. I don’t.” Then again, freshmen probably didn’t know many upperclassmen.
“You’re a good boxer. Maybe you can help out more leading up to my fight.” I liked the kid. He had balls, and if he’d studied Reggie’s moves, I could use him on my team.
“Seriously, dude?” His eyes flashed with excitement as he zipped up his bag. “I’d be honored.”
“Clear it with Jay. I’ve got to run.” Since it was Thursday, it was brothers’ night. Kody, Kelton, Kade, and I hung out once a week, watching sports, drinking, or both.
Heading for the showers, I called Kody. “Hey, are you still coming over tonight?” I’d asked him to keep a lid on my secret until I told Kade and Kelton.
“Only if you’re ready to break the news to our brothers.”
“I am.” I hated to keep anything from them, and if I didn’t get the shit off my chest, I was going to explode. Plus, I needed to win my next fight. I’d worked my tail off to become a boxer. I couldn’t throw it all away when I was so close to signing with Gail Freeman.
“Good, because it’s killing me. You know they won’t judge.”
It wasn’t about them judging me. Kelton had been supportive when I told him Ruby had thought she was pregnant. But I wasn’t sure how Kade would react, although I could hear him now. “Where was your protection?”
I shrugged off Kade for the moment then quickly showered and dressed as I thought of Ruby.
Every night, I lay awake, wondering if she’d given birth to a boy or a girl. And what color hair did the kid have? Black like me or red like her? What did she name the child? How in the fuck was I going to tell my parents? Or Kade?
I was slipping my wallet into the back pocket of my jeans when the door creaked open.
“He was in here earlier,” a guy said.
“Maxwell,” someone called out. “You in here? It’s Dillon, man.” He came into view around a bank of lockers. “You look like shit. What happened?”
“And you look like a girl with your hair in a ponytail,” I chided, shutting my locker.
Dillon Hart, badass dude, loved by women, had a heart of gold, particularly when it came to young girls who ran away from home or pimped themselves on the streets. He tried to save them all while searching for his baby sister who’d run away two years prior at the age of sixteen. I had to hand it to him. The man was planning to open a home for runaway girls. All that aside, Dillon and I had become close friends. Maybe his street connections could help me find Ruby.
“Women get their panties wet over my hair. I see you’re growing yours out. Copycat.”
I pushed my fingers through my thick wet strands. It had been four years since the last time I’d let my hair grow past my ears. I usually kept it high and tight, but Dillon was wearing off on me. I wasn’t planning on ponytails, but Lizzie had counseled me that girls liked to play with hair. She even went as far as telling me that she loved running her fingers through Kelton’s hair. I had noticed I was getting more looks with my longer style, and even Penelope had commented on how she liked playing with my hair.
“Bite me. What’s up?”
He leaned a shoulder against the locker, shoving a hand into the pocket of his jeans. “I needed to beat something, and I thought of you. But I see you’re heading out.”
“Problems? Can’t get a girl in your bed?” I teased.
“I see you’re in rare form. Who pissed in your territory?”
An auburn-haired girl. My kid who I didn’t know.
He grinned. “Not getting laid enough?”
“On the contrary.” I didn’t have any problems in the bedroom. “Trying to find a girl who seems to have disappeared.”
He popped off the locker. “Tell me more.” The light snuffed out in his brown eyes at the word “disappeared.”
I couldn’t tell him until I told my brothers. Blood always came before friends. “Look, I need some help. Why don’t you hang with my brothers and me tonight? I’ll fill you in then.”
He nodded. “I’ll pick up some beer.”
I harrumphed. “Whiskey would be better.”
“That bad?”
“I guess that depends on how you look at it.” I couldn’t get past how furious I was with Ruby that she had lied to me. At sixteen, I wasn’t ready for a child, and neither was she. She didn’t have to shoulder the burden all by herself, though. I would’ve taken responsibility. I might have been a dick for not wanting to talk to her, but for fuck’s sake, I’d had a right to know. Yeah, you would’ve known if you had called her back or picked up the phone, dickwad.
I growled.
Dillon slapped me on the back. “I’m here for you.”
I prayed Kade had the same attitude.
Two hours later, Kade, Kelton, Kody, Dillon, and I were watching the Patriots play Buffalo.
“You guys lucked out on this apartment,” Dillon said with a mouth full of pizza.
The brownstone was a monstrosity, with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, a modest kitchen, and a dining room. I was surprised that Kelton and Lizzie had found the place. It was located close to Boston University for Lizzie and Kelton. It was close to Rumors for Kade, and it was a perfect spot for me since I could walk to the gym from there.
Kody tapped me on the arm. “Well?”
I reached for the bottle of whiskey that was on the glass coffee table. The Pats scored, and Kelton and Kade high-fived. I poured five shots as Kade and Kelton jabbered about the Pats quarterback. Then Kody muted the TV.
“You better have a good reason,” Kade said with a growl.
A sharp pain gripped my stomach. I didn’t need Kade in a bad mood. Not if I was about to tell him I could be a father. I could hear his voice in my head. “What did Dad teach us? Are you a moron?”
I knocked back a shot. The amber liquid burned on the way down as vomit threatened to shoot up.
Kade scowled. “Since when do you drink whiskey?”
I lifted a shoulder as I grabbed another shot. The longer I looked at Kade, the more my courage vanished and the more nausea settled heavily in my stomach. As I shifted my gaze to Kelton, I was reminded of the day he’d found out that he could’ve been a father. Fear had turned my brother whiter than snow. I probably had the same fucking color on my face.
Kody nudged me. “Slow down.”
Dillon joined in, drinking his shot.
Kade raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on? You’re pale.”
Kelton helped himself to a shot as he watched me.
My heart beat like a wild boxer who was throwing his fists into my face repeatedly and in quick successions. “I have something to tell you.” I blew out a breath. “When Kody and I were up at the academy, I decided to drive by a friend’s house.” I never talked about Ruby to Kade, only because our mom had been the focal point of our family at the time. Then when I left the academy, I’d put that part of my life behind me. “Anyway, I dated this girl Ruby at the academy.” I snatched the last shot of whiskey.
“If it’s what you told me,” Kelton said, “Kade won’t kill you. Nothing came of it.”
I tipped my head to the side and frowned.
“You said she wasn’t.” Kelton’s eyes went wide. “Dude, talk.”
Kade sat quietly, his gaze never wavering from mine.
My pulse pounded in my ears. “Ruby thought she was pregnant, but it turned out she wasn’t. At least that’s what she told me.”
Kade’s copper eyes formed into slits.
The room began to spin. I release
d a breath, then another, willing the bile to go down. My head began to hurt. Sweat coated my entire body as though I’d just finished a workout.
“Kross? Kross?” Kody’s voice was faint, as though he were a million miles away instead of sitting next to me.
“Dude?” Dillon’s voice was a little louder.
I jumped up and over Kody. Kade got up too. Then I began pacing even though my legs were trembling. As I swayed to one side, Kade caught me.
“Just tell them.” The words rushed out of Kody’s mouth.
Kade crossed his arms over his chest as I walked over to the window, away from everyone. The emotional turmoil wreaking havoc inside me was on the precipice of exploding, and I didn’t want my brothers near if I lashed out. “I’m a daddy.”
“What the fuck!” Kade’s voice went up.
I glanced from the busy street below back to the room. Kade’s eyebrows were raised. Dillon and Kelton had their mouths hanging open. Kody picked at a label on his beer bottle.
“After Kody and I left the academy last week, I wanted to see if I could get in touch with Ruby. So I went to her house. We didn’t find her or her family, but we did speak with Ruby’s neighbor, Tasha. During the start of Ruby’s junior year, Ruby and her mom left town. When they did, Ruby was pregnant, and I’m the father.”
“Do you believe this neighbor?” Kade asked.
I bowed my head. “According to Tasha, there was no mistaking that Ruby was pregnant four years ago. So that much is true. As far as me being the father, I contacted Tasha’s brother. He confirmed that Ruby told him a Kross Maxwell was the father. Part of me believes him. She wasn’t the type to sleep around. I’m such an idiot. She’d been calling me and leaving messages shortly after we moved home from the academy. I didn’t return her calls. I was… I don’t know what I was.” I glanced at Kade. A muscle jumped in his jaw. “I fucked up. I didn’t use a condom. I didn’t follow what Dad taught us about safe sex.” My stomach heaved, and I swallowed the bile.
Kade’s eyebrows hovered at his hairline. “You never kept in contact with her?”
Cars six stories down crowded the busy Boston streets.
My gut twisted in several directions. “No. Look, Ruby was beautiful, fun, and she helped me through the dark days at the academy. But when we moved home, I wanted to put my life at the academy behind us. I wasn’t ready for love. If you want to beat my head in, go right ahead. I deserve every ounce of punishment you want to give.” Or at least one round of punishment. The second round would be more painful when I told my parents.
Kade sauntered up to me. “Brother, I’m not going to beat your head in. However, I can’t say I’m not shocked. Regardless, we need to find this girl and find the truth. If she gave birth to a Maxwell, then she and the kid belong with us.”
My head spun as I made my way back to the couch. I had to sit down before I collapsed.
Kade caught my arm. “We’ll find her.”
I laughed out of sheer panic. “What happens when we find her?” I would go to the ends of the earth to find this woman and my child. “I don’t know the first thing about being a dad. Besides, it’s clear in my mind that Ruby doesn’t want anything to do with me. Otherwise, she would’ve contacted me again.”
Kade drew me in for a hug. “Regardless, we’re here to help you no matter what.”
I hugged him back with all the strength I had. I almost bawled like a damn baby. “What about Mom and Dad? I can’t imagine telling them.”
Kade let go of me. “We will do it together, but not before we find Ruby. There’s no sense in getting them all worked up if you’re not the father.” He pinned a look on Kody and Kelton. Both nodded.
Dillon sat, observing and pensive. I imagined he was thinking of his own family. He fought every day to keep his spirits up while continually searching for his sister. He had brothers, but he didn’t talk much about them. “So, I take it I’m here because you want me to help find her,” Dillon said.
Kade stalked over to the coffee table and took a swig of whiskey straight from the bottle.
“You do have a ton of connections,” I said to Dillon as I walked on shaky legs back to my seat. “I’ve been thinking.” My brain hurt from all the images, scenarios, and ways to find Ruby. “We might be able to start with her old man. Tasha told us he was busted for drugs. I’m not sure if he’s still in jail, but maybe we can find out. If he is, then I can pay him a visit. He might know where she is.”
“If the dude’s in jail, then there’s a public record of what went down.” Kelton finally relaxed into the couch. “Well, maybe. If the feds were involved, then they could’ve sealed the records, depending on the drug bust. I’ll look into that when I go into the office tomorrow.”
I hadn’t thought of that. Regardless, I was grateful that Kelton was working at a law firm while he studied to get his law degree.
“I just thought of something. I’ll talk with Detective Rayburn.” He and I had met when Kelton, Lizzie, Dillon, and I were at an illegal gambling game, and the cops had hauled us off to jail. Mark Rayburn was a fan of mine too. “He probably has easier access to get information on inmates than what you would find,” I said to Kelton. “He also might be able to search his database for an address on Ruby.” As soon as my excitement stirred, it was quickly squashed. Detective Rayburn was out of town at the moment. I’d spoken to him before my trip to the Berkshires, and he’d mentioned that he wouldn’t be around for a couple of weeks. He had some assignment in New York.
“What’s wrong?” Kade asked.
“It might be a while before I can get a hold of Mark. He’s working on a case in New York.” But I could at least call him.
“Dillon,” Kelton said. “Lizzie told me one of your guys hacked into the BU computer system to find out more about her. Maybe he can hack into the government’s computers. That might be faster than waiting on Mark or me to sift through records.”
Dillon straightened. “The BU computers are one thing, but the government?” He shook his head. “That’s asking for more trouble.”
“Dude,” I pleaded. “I’m desperate. Put yourself in my shoes. What if you knew you had a kid in this world? What would you do?” Dillon had a ton of connections outside of his guy who hacked into computers. Kelton was right. He might encounter red tape, and I might not get through to Mark.
Dillon grabbed the whiskey bottle. “I can’t have my guys snooping. But I know someone who might be able to help. I’ll pick you up on Saturday night,” he said to me.
The room fell into an eerie silence. Kade stared into space. Kody continued to pick at the label on his beer bottle. Kelton focused on the muted TV. Dillon drank from the whiskey bottle. As for me, my brain spun with visions of a little boy running around who looked like me. My heart skipped a beat, then another. I had a feeling my heart wouldn’t settle until I found Ruby.
4
Ruby
Norma and I stood in a room in the basement of Firefly, waiting for Tommy. The strong odor of urine burned the hair in my nostrils. During the past week, Norma had recovered after I’d given her the NyQuil I’d stolen. It had taken her a couple of days, but thankfully, she’d gotten better.
“This is the craziest thing I’ve ever heard of.” She watched me pace, pick at my nails, and twist strands of my long hair around my fingers. “I still can’t believe that a few minutes from now, you’re about to fight. When have you ever fought?” Her voice cracked.
“Never. But if I win, we’ll have money to buy food.” I hadn’t even gotten into a spat or fight with any girls in school. Aside from my close friends, I’d always kept to myself, not sticking my nose where it didn’t belong. Unlike the popular girls who’d wanted all the attention, the only attention I’d craved was from Kross or the audience at one of my ballet performances.
She grabbed my wrist. “Stop bouncing around. You’re making me more nervous. You don’t have to do this. We’ll keep looking for jobs.”
I stomped my foot like a two-yea
r-old. Every fast food place I’d followed up with had given me the thumbs-down in the last week. “No one is hiring, or no one wants to hire me. I’ve got to get Raven back.” I cried most nights at the thought of her with another family. I also cursed my mom for hooking up with one of my father’s associates, who’d convinced her to step into my father’s drug-dealing shoes. My mom had no skills other than being a stay-at-home mom. She’d tried to get a job as an office assistant, a fast-food worker, even a clerk at one of the big chain stores. I had given the job hunt a go too before I delivered Raven. But no one would consider a pregnant girl. So when my dad’s associate approached her, my mom caved. I tried to convince her not to take the offer, but I couldn’t blame her too much. We’d been desperate.
“Ruby, you could get hurt. I can’t stomach that. All the money in the world isn’t worth you risking yourself.”
“I’m doing this for us, and for Raven. I’ll never get her back if I can’t show I’m responsible.”
“Do you think fighting in a dump like this is responsible? This idea is as bad as the one I had to work for my pimp.”
“We need to eat. I just don’t know what else to do. I can’t sit around the streets, begging for money. Like you said, we can put money away.” Some days, I collected five dollars, but other days, I received nothing. I blinked away a tear. “I’ll be fine,” I lied. If I was going up against a girl twice my size, I didn’t stand a chance. Then again, the way the adrenaline was coursing through my body, I might be able to wield a good punch or two, maybe even to the point where I could knock out my opponent. I blew out a breath. I could do this. I was a ballet dancer after all. Then I broke out in hysterics.
Norma cocked her head. “What’s so funny?”
Ballet and fighting were vastly different. I didn’t know a darn thing about bobbing or weaving, but Kross had always told me that ballet and boxing were very similar. “You dance to music. I dance around boxers. Both are about footwork,” he’d said. Argh! Kross Maxwell. Since Raven was born, I couldn’t help but be reminded of Kross. Every time she smiled, it was like Kross was smiling back at me.
Dare to Dance Page 4
