by Sara Daniell
He gets closer so he is only inches from my face and speaks quietly. “Because Orion, it proves how powerful you are. Making the ones who care about you the most forget you? Only someone with our ability and power could do that. And it’s a test to make sure you will do what they tell you to and another part of the breaking process.”
“But-” I start to say something, but he interrupts.
“They think they have done us some sort of favor. They think that they made us forget everything during the breaking process.” He stops talking and waits for me to respond.
I swallow hard. “After we make our family forget us, what are we required to do next?”
“They throw us into towns where we secretly use our ability to brainwash Dwellers. Our effects last for months but eventually wear off, and then we are sent out again.”
“What are we brainwashing them for?”
“To make sure they never find out about Earth and always believe that the Constable are the greatest beings alive.”
“I have always wondered why others didn’t question their authority. Promote peace and shit but hang the first to do wrong without giving them a chance to change? It has never made sense to me. Is that why I never fell for their lies? Because I have the ability of mind control?”
He nods his head. “That’s the theory.”
I run my hands through my hair and place my back against the wall. “How do we have abilities? Where do we come from?”
“It is said that our kind slips up in the genetics of our parents and pass on to their offspring. The Constable thought they did away with those with abilities and bred them out of genetics. Only keeping a few for themselves.” He stops and points to himself and then to me. “Obviously, they didn’t succeed. So, they decided to put us to use.”
“Right… So, what else are we required to do?” I ask with my eyes closed. Maybe when I open them I’ll wake up from this bad dream.
“We have to use mind control to make Dwellers make bad decisions, leading to their death.”
I quickly open my eyes. “What! Why the hell would they want us to do that?”
“Trust me, it only gets worse. But yes. The Constable never want Dwellers to forget how powerful they are. They have us convince innocent Dwellers to do wrong things so they have a reason to kill them. I don’t know why they do that. All they need us to do is control their minds to always fear them. I think they enjoy shedding blood. It’s entertainment for them. But it also helps them figure out who the rebels are. Have you ever wondered why they don’t want us showing emotions?”
Yes. Every damn day. “Why?”
“Because they want to know they are feared by Dwellers. They want to know that our mind control is working. Plus, it makes it easier to detect those who plan on rebelling against them.”
I rub my temples. This is crazy. My mind goes back to the time when I stopped that shoplifter and got in so much trouble. I remember them hanging him in front of Dandux that Thursday. It makes sense now why they punished me also and why they kept such a close eye on me after that. The therapy, everything makes sense now. They don’t want Dwellers showing more power than them. They want to be the only ones who are feared. I have the most gut-wrenching feeling in the pit of my stomach right now.
I look at Kyle. “How the hell am I supposed to make my family forget me? There is no way I can walk into my home and act as if I don’t remember them and then control their minds.”
A tear falls down my cheek when I replay the image of my father’s body dangling lifeless from a rope. What could he have done to deserve that? Anger fills every inch of me, burning like hot lava in my veins. I look to the three in the room with me and wonder if they used mind control to cause him to do wrong. He would’ve never done wrong without being persuaded.
Kyle notices my trembling hands and sees the anger brewing in my eyes. “Are you okay?” He asks as he takes steps further and further away from me.
I quickly grab his neck with both hands and squeeze enough to temporarily cut off his breathing. “Who killed my father!”
He quickly pries my hands from his throat. He’s breathing heavily and has murder in his eyes. Marah runs over and jumps in front of me, and Dex grabs Kyle, forcing him to refrain himself from harming me.
“What’s going on?” Marah yells, her expression full of shock.
“Who persuaded my father to do something wrong leading to his death?” I ask as I stand up and back myself into a corner. All three of them look at one another with grim expressions. I wait impatiently for them to answer me.
What are you doing?” I ask Sage as I time myself loading a gun again.
She laughs. “You’re getting better at that.” She stands up and stretches. “And the answer to your question is… I’m not telling you.”
I stop the timer on my cell phone and roll my eyes. “You’ve been really secretive lately.”
“If I told you it was for both of our benefits, would you let it go?”
I shrug and put my gun back in my boot. “Probably not.”
She looks lost in thought as she reads a text message then smiles at me as she slips it into her pocket. “Gotta go!”
“Of course you do.” I lean back into the softness of the couch. She hurries out the door. She’s been so weird lately.
I WAKE UP with a slight smile, but it quickly fades. I miss Sage so damn much. I sit up and run my hands over my sheets. The last thing I remember is almost killing Kyle. Now I’m in my bed, surrounded by white. But how did I get here? I wish I knew what time it was or had someone to talk to. I really wish I had Sage to talk to.
I roll over and hear something crinkle under my pillow. I slowly reach my hand under it and pull a piece of paper out. I unfold the small piece of paper and read:
NEVER pull a stunt like that again.
- P
I form the paper into a ball and throw it on the floor. I place my hands over my face and wish I could sleep away the rest of my existence.
I bet I could run away. I have lived the past four years running on Earth. Perfecting my ability to get away undetected. It’s what I’m good at. I stand to my feet, feeling empowered by my decision, and head for the door. I take a deep breath and turn the knob. I’m surprised when it’s unlocked. I peek my head out and don’t see anyone in the hall. This is my chance.
I tiptoe out and flatten my body against the wall. I look both ways, and after I convince myself that it’s safe, I run fast as hell down the hall. I turn my head to look over my shoulder and when I do, I run into someone causing us both to plummet to the ground.
“First you try to choke me, and now you are trying to knock the shit out of me. We are going to be great friends.” I roll off Kyle as he speaks and curse under my breath.
I quickly stand to my feet. “What are you doing out?” I ask breathlessly.
He cocks an eyebrow at me. “What are you doing out is the better question.”
I smile sweetly as I lie. “Sleepwalking. Oops.”
He laughs and quickly looks behind his shoulder. Looking back at me, he says, “Follow me.”
I step away from him and raise my eyebrows. “Why would I follow you anywhere? I don’t know you.”
His mouth forms into a hard line before responding, “Then don’t.” He turns and starts walking off.
I hesitate for a moment but convince myself to go with him. It’s better than sitting in my room. When I catch up to him, we run through a door that blends in with the white walls. We come to a set of stairs and run down them as quietly as we can. Once we reach the bottom of the stairs, he opens another door. We both run out, and I’m shocked when I smell home. I smell Dandux.
I want to run further, but I’m stopped by metal bars. I grasp the bars tightly and look down. We have to be at least twelve stories up. I look at Kyle. He has his eyes closed as he breathes in the fresh air.
“What are you thinking right this second?” He opens his eyes and looks down at me.
A tear
I didn’t even know was forming falls from my eye and down my cheek. I quickly wipe it away. “I’m thinking it smells just like Dandux. I compare the smell to a wet rock.”
He starts laughing. “Well, this isn’t Dandux. It’s the city of Hender. The capital of our Sphere.”
I close my eyes and pretend like it is Dandux anyway. I pretend as if I am at The Quest with Sage. I can hear her laughing and bitching about everything. I smile inwardly at how simple things were before I screwed everything up.
I open my eyes before I lose it. “So, what is this place, and how did you find it?” I ask as I look at the small perimeter of concrete and metal bars.
“Just roaming around when I got bored one day.” He looks at me with a half-grin. “Don’t you have something to apologize for?”
I roll my eyes. “I don’t apologize for anything. So, no. But I would still like an explanation about what happened to my father. Did you have something to do with his death?”
He laughs then his expression goes grim. He shakes his head. “I can’t give you that kind of information. If they found out-” His voice trails off, and he looks away.
My hands begin to shake. “I don’t give a damn if they find out! I want to know!” I close my eyes and rest my forehead against the metal bars. I breathe slowly in and out to try to calm myself down.
“It was him or your brother Felix.”
My heart feels like it’s in my throat. I open my eyes and turn my head to look at him. “What? What do you mean?”
“That’s all I’m telling you, Orion. No more.”
“What kept them from killing my whole family? Please,” I beg. “I have to know more. I need closure.” That’s a lie. I need to know so I can kill the bastard who killed my father! I fight back tears and attempt to keep my anger at bay.
“I said no more!” He shouts.
I jump a little when he yells. “Fine.” I look down and imagine launching myself over the edge. Ending my life so I don’t have to live in this hell. I sigh heavily. “How were our doors unlocked?” I ask quietly.
“I can’t tell you that either.”
I glare at him. “Then what is the point of me standing out here with you?”
He glares back. “You tell me.”
I don’t answer him. Instead, I focus on the ground below us. I consider letting myself fall to the ground again. It would only hurt for a second, maybe less. Maybe not at all. I’ve never craved death like this. I’ve always ran from it. But now I want it. I want it more than anything.
We walk back inside, and I notice Plath standing at the top of the stairs, his arms crossed over his chest and standing tall like he’s somebody important.
“What are you two doing out of your rooms?” He asks as he looks at Kyle and avoids me.
Kyle laughs coldly but doesn’t respond. He motions for me to follow him up the stairs, so I continue walking. Not because I want to follow him but because I don’t know my way back to my room.
We get to the top where Plath is standing. He looks in my direction for a brief moment, careful to keep his expression emotionless, then back at Kyle. I continue to follow Kyle and discretely turn my head to look back at Plath. When I don’t see him there anymore, I turn back around.
I sigh heavily as we continue walking towards our rooms. Sleep sounds nice, but how in the hell am I supposed to sleep with everything that’s going on? I look up and see the sign for our hall and walk past Kyle to go to my room. Before I open my door, I turn to look at Kyle, but he is already in his room.
I close my door quietly behind me then go sit on my bed. I lay my head back on my pillow and hear a crinkling sound again. I reach my hand under it and pull out another note:
I came to talk to you, but you were gone. Do NOT leave this room again unless instructed to do so.
- P
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out these are from Plath. I crumple the paper and hold it in my fist. I’m so confused. Why is he acting like he cares? If he cared, he wouldn’t he have handed me over to the Constable. I get out of bed and put the note in the toilet. I watch it go down after pulling the lever.
Once back in bed, I cover myself and close my eyes. Images of Sage and my father play in my mind. This is my fault. Every damn bit of it. None of this would have happened if I didn’t eavesdrop that night.
I can’t lie here. I throw the covers off of me and sigh heavily for the hundredth time in the past hour. I run my hands over my face then get up and pace around the room. I wish I had something to do besides replay every detail of what happened while on Earth. I stop when I see my doorknob start to turn. I quickly run back to my bed and cover up—acting like I’m asleep.
I concentrate on keeping my breathing slow and steady as I hear footsteps coming closer to me. I feel the covers peel back slowly from my shoulders, and my heartbeat speeds up. I clench my fist tight and hold my breath.
“Orion?” I hear Plath’s voice, and it sends unnerving chills down my spine.
I ignore him.
“Orion, please. I don’t have much time, and I need to talk to you.”
“You betrayed me,” is the first thing I say without opening my eyes or turning over to face him. I feel tears burning my eyelids. I try to force them to stay back, but they don’t. I hate what he does to me. I hate that a part of me still wants to care for him.
“Would you let me explain?” His voice sounds caring, and it makes me hate him even more.
“What’s done is done.” I pull my sheets up to wipe my tears. I need to toughen up. I can’t turn to mush now. Not here. Not in front of him. I can’t allow him to see this part of me ever again. He doesn’t deserve to see me broken. He doesn’t deserve to see me at all.
“I’m here to bring you to meet with the Constable. But before I do, I want you to know that I would rather you be dead than in here. I would have done you a favor to have killed you myself.”
I sit up then bend over to reach for my shoes on the floor. I want to scream at him. I want to kill him, but instead, I start putting on my shoes. “Did you know they killed my father?” I ask calmly.
He looks me directly in the eyes, and I wonder how he can after all he has done. “I didn’t know how to tell you,” he mumbles quietly.
I scoff at his response. “You didn’t know how to tell me?” I stand up and push him hard in the chest. “Who the hell do you think you are?”
“Orion, calm down!”
I clench my jaw tight and slap him across his face. He turns his head and holds his cheek for a second. When he looks at me again, I ball the front of his shirt into my fist and get inches from his face. “You have no right to tell me to calm down! Damn, I wish I had a gun.” I shove him away from me as I release his shirt.
To my surprise, he reaches in his pocket and takes out a pistol. He clicks the safety off and takes my hand—placing the gun in it. He steps back and closes his eyes. I raise the gun with shaky hands and point it at his head. I start to pull the trigger. This is what I want. Isn’t it? The one who hurt me the most, dead? But… Then there’s just that. The “but”. I slowly move my finger away from the trigger and turn the safety back on. I take a deep breath and wipe tears from my eyes. I place the gun down on my bed and look at Plath.
He opens his eyes and looks at the gun on the bed. His eyes drift back to me. “I don’t know what to say to you to make you understand my side of this.”
I kneel down and tie my shoes with shaky hands. I try to focus on breathing. The gun is tempting me. Not to kill Plath but to kill myself. It’d be so easy. Just a pull of the trigger, and it’s all over. I look at Plath as I stand back up. “I don’t know how to process all of this! Just take me wherever you need to take me.” I start to walk towards the door, but he stops me by grabbing my arm.
He picks up the gun and places it in my hand. “Keep this. Don’t get caught with it.” He hands me a black Velcro strap from his pocket. “Pull up your pant leg.” I do as he says and pull my right pant leg up to my kne
e.
He laughs a little. “Higher.”
He then pulls the pant leg all the way up, exposing my thigh. He takes the gun and strap from my hand and wraps the black Velcro strap securely around my upper thigh. He checks the safety then places the gun securely in the strap. He pulls my pant leg back down and looks to make sure it’s hidden. “Always keep that with you.”
I nod. “Okay.”
“I need to take you to them. We’re late, and they’ll notice soon.” He looks at his watch then opens the door for me. “Follow me, and remember you don’t have a clue who I am.”
“I don’t have to pretend. I really don’t know who you are,” I say quietly but loud enough for him to hear.
I follow Plath down the dim hall. My mind is running all over the place. Plath keeps a straight face as we walk. I try to concentrate on doing the same, but what am I supposed to do when I’m face-to-face with them?
I’m not sure if I should smile and act like the Constable hung the moon, if I should remain emotionless, or tell them they are worthless pieces of shit. Definitely that they are a worthless piece of shit. This should end nicely. A wicked smile plays at my lips.
Plath gives me a reassuring nod before he opens the white double doors. Bright lights illuminate the room. I squint my eyes as I walk past him. Sunlight fills the room with warmth through large open windows that line the walls. I swallow hard as I stop walking and face the Constable.
I notice an empty chair, right next to the man in the middle. I watch Plath as he makes his way to the table, and the chair is no longer empty. My whole body begins to tremble. He’s one of them. I then see a familiar face next to Plath. Nikolai. I immediately wonder how many rounds are in this pistol and how quickly I could put a bullet in each of their heads before they even knew what hit them. Better yet? I could use mind control, if I knew how to, and convince them all to walk off the top of this building. I feel the corners of my lips twitch like I’m going to smile.
