by S M Mala
‘Really Belle,’ she sympathetically says.
‘Yes, really!’
‘Who’s better in bed?’ she whispers and I’m dumb struck for a moment. ‘Josh the love of your life or Hal the stud of your life?’
‘I really can’t answer that,’ I reply avoiding eye contact.
‘Yes you can.’
‘I think each one is unique,’ I diplomatically reply.
‘But who floats your boat?’ she persists. ‘Who would you pick, if you had to choose?’
‘That’s not an option,’ I say knowing she’s getting pissed.
‘Come on. It’s like a special wish.’
‘Both!’ I say and see if anyone is listening.
‘You can’t have both!’
‘Who says I can’t?’
‘You are such a greedy cow!’ Meena laughs out loud.
There’s no fooling the best friend, is there?
Eighteen
It didn’t take me long to recover from seeing Josh. In fact it took me longer to recover from my hangover! Or so I want to convince myself.
The ‘arrangement’ has been going for a few months and I am now put in a situation where Hal is throwing a party at his home. Joan and I have been invited.
To say I’m uncomfortable is putting it mildly.
Joan left a message saying to look smart and turn up for nine thirty at Hal’s. I am wearing the dress he bought me and a wrap to hide my boobs wobbling due to the low-neck line. My shoes are high enough to make me look a bit slender and low enough so I can actually walk.
I am standing on the pavement and I’m not sure this is a good idea. I don’t know his circle of friends and Joan does. There’s a sinking feeling in my tummy. Maybe that’s down to too much gin and tonic before I left.
I let these glamorous people walk in and I really can’t do it. It is going to be the mother in law of humiliation.
As I turn on my heels, I hear Hal shout,
‘Where do you think you’re going?’ I turn to see him standing at the door with a massive grin on his face. Shit, why has my gut flipped? I have to smile. He looks edible.
‘I forgot something. I need to go home,’ I say, eyeing up the handsome man. My cheeks are getting flushed as more gorgeous people walk past me and the host with the most is greeting them but keeping his eyes firmly fixed on me so I’m rooted to the spot.
‘Bullshit,’ he replies then laughs, walking towards me. ‘If it’s that important, you wouldn’t have forgotten it.’
‘Look, to be honest, I’m not in the mood,’ I say, looking at the door to see if Joan is suddenly going to jump out.
‘What’s worrying you?’ he gently says.
‘Joan,’ I eventually say. ‘And your friends.’
‘Come in and face the music or are you scared?’ I nod and he smiles then shakes his head. ‘You look lovely and there’s nothing to be afraid of. Where’s your confidence?’
‘This is so wrong,’ I whinge. ‘Your friends know Joan and how do I explain who I am?’
‘Say you’re Belle and all will be okay,’ Hal says and kisses me on the nose. ‘The dress looks amazing on you.’
‘How much have you had to drink?’
‘Not enough to get through this evening, it seems.’
Then I see Joan from the corner of my eye at the door.
‘Aren’t you coming in?’ she says and Hal turns to walk back in.
‘She’s just coming,’ he replies and I watch him disappear inside as Joan stands there and glares at me as I walk towards her.
‘Hello,’ I say breathing in deeply and stand in front of her as she eyes me up and down.
‘What on earth are you wearing?’ she says, turning up her nose up at me. My confidence hits rock bottom but I smile knowing she’s not going to say anything nice.
‘You look nice too,’ I say looking at her in the green dress with vomit that I saw in the shop. I smile knowing he must have bought it for her.
I walk past her taking a deep breath and see the guests chatting and laughing.
They’re beautiful people you hear so much about, but frankly, some surgeon is making a mint. I notice Hal and he’s seriously engrossed in a conversation then winks at me. This makes me smile as I grab a glass of wine from a passing waiter.
‘What are you grinning at? You look like a mad woman!’ I’m caught by Joan.
‘Still here?’
‘I see the pounds are settling in nicely from the shape of your dress.’ She taps my arse. My immediate reaction is to slap her. ‘Watch it Belle or you’ll be big as a bell.’ She throws her head back. Ha! Ha! Ha! She’s so funny I could vomit on her shoes to match her dress.
‘I like your outfit,’ I lie.
‘Well, if you ever get down to a size six you can borrow it.’
‘You know a lot of the people here, I take it,’ I say glancing around the room.
‘I know a few of them,’ she replies shaking her blonde bob. ‘And you know no one.’
‘I know Hal and you.’
‘He doesn’t let you mingle with his friends?’ she asks knowing the answer.
‘There never seems enough time.’
‘Or he’s deeply ashamed of you,’ she whispers in my ear.
Christ, I can’t do this. She’s making me feel like shit. I have to pull myself together.
‘Then why has he asked me here?’ I say turning to look at her.
‘To help clean up afterwards,’ she replies and bares fangs. ‘I told him you were a good little scrubber.’
I shake my head. There’s no answer to that.
‘What’s wrong?’ Joan asks, flashing a bitchy look.
‘I need some air. I forget how much I miss your company.’
‘Go on then, go away. They may need some help in the kitchen.’ She laughs once again at her joke.
I walk into the garden and recognise a few friendly faces from when I went away for the weekend. As I speak to them I glance around to see Joan and Hal standing next to each other.
Then once again the thought crosses through my mind.
. Both Joan and I have swapped saliva with the same man. I shudder at the thought.
When people ask me who I am, I tell them that I work occasionally for Hal (knowing if I mention I’m Joan’s daughter in law they’ll know about the arrangement. I’m in no need for strange looks).
I keep glancing at Hal but every time I do, I catch Joan’s eye. She’s coming over towards me. She looks a bit pissed.
‘Still here?’ she asks and manages to step on my toe.
‘Watch your feet,’ I say, reeling back in pain.
‘Sorry,’ she replies and I know she trod on my foot purposely. ‘You know you shouldn’t be here.’
‘Why not?’
‘He’s making a fool out of you and you can’t see it. Imagine what people think when they know you and I are sharing the same man,’ she says turning to face me and blocking out my view of Hal.
‘It was your idea,’ I calmly reply and try to step around her but she quickly stops me.
‘I hate it,’ Joan hisses into my ear. ‘The idea that you’re touching him makes me want to retch!’
‘I feel the same way.’ I step back and look at her angry face.
‘I was here first and women like you come and go. He always comes back to me.’
‘I’m not stopping him,’ I reply and I can see from her body language she’s up for a fight.
‘Then finish it!’ she snaps.
‘You wanted me to do this, the pair of you. I thought about it for a long time and then I-.’
‘You should have said no!’
‘You kept going on about it,’ I snap turning to see if anyone is listening in. I notice Jenny peering over and talking to someone, obviously giving a blow by blow account on what she’s seeing.
‘I had to show him I was trying to convince you. If you had said no or that I wasn’t keen, he’d have tried harder,’ says Joan her voice shaking with anger. ‘Y
ou’re humiliating me.’ Suddenly I notice the tears in her eyes and I know she’s right. I look at her as she shakes her hair then looks at her glass. ‘I’m getting another drink.’
I am rooted to the spot before I look up and see Hal talking to a couple, who look like they’re models, then I examine the room. These people are friends of Joan and Hal’s. They know they are together.
I wonder what they think of me?
Other than the ones I met at the weekend, not one of them has tried to make conversation. They don’t seem a friendly bunch.
Okay I’m not making much of an effort but still, they know all the others you think they’d try and make a newcomer welcome, wouldn’t you?
The music gets louder and I see people strutting their stuff as I walk out of the upstairs bathroom and peer down from the balcony. Joan is shuffling. She has to because she’s too stiff to move her body and she’s getting drunk by the second.
‘Not joining in?’ I turn and Hal’s standing a few feet behind me. He quickly comes forward and pulls me onto a corner and plants smacker on my lips. Gosh, he’s sexy. He pushes me up against a wall and his hand is rubbing up and down my body, from my breast to thigh. Lust is an amazing thing. Shit, is anyone looking?
‘You’ve guests,’ I say glumly before pushing him away.
‘Hey, what’s wrong?’ he asks peering into my face.
‘I should go.’
‘No,’ Hal says. ‘I don’t want you to go.’
‘I don’t fit in.’
‘You haven’t tried.’
‘Joan hates the fact I’m here,’ I snap, letting him see how riled I feel.
‘I love the fact you’re here. Come in to the bedroom,’ he says pulling my arm.
‘Not a good idea.’ I quickly glance down to see if Joan is coming up.
‘Are you sure?’ Hal says as his lips move down to my cleavage. My hands are moving through his hair, his locks feel so soft and I’ve suddenly got a raging horn.
‘Of course I’m not sure,’ I say pulling his head up in my hands and I kiss his lips gently. ‘But if Joan catches us it’s not worth the grief.’
‘I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer,’ he says and quickly drags me into one of the spare bedrooms.
‘Hal!’ I snap as he shuts the door and locks it, pushing me against the door. ‘Someone might hear.’
‘I don’t care,’ he says pushing up my dress. ‘You look gorgeous.’
I grab him and kiss him passionately. I’m so up for a quick one and unbuckle his trousers grabbing his willy.
‘Tug away,’ he says, kissing my neck and grabbing my boobs.
‘Stick it in quickly,’ I say romantically.
We have to do this before we get caught so I shan’t play hard to get.
He does as he’s told and he feels great, then he lifts me onto a side table and plonks me there then starts humping away.
‘Don’t make any noise,’ I whisper in to his ear.
‘I want you to,’ he says kissing me.
‘I can’t. You’ve got guests.’
‘You can do whatever you like,’ he says looking at me and smiling.
‘But I don’t want then to think I’m a slapper,’ I say and hold on then he stops and stares straight at me.
‘Why would they think that?’
‘Because you sleep around and they might think I’m, I don’t know,’ I sigh and pull him in deeper. ’It’s embarrassing if they know about Joan. I look like a slut.’
‘Fine,’ he says pulling out and doing up his fly.
‘What’s wrong?’ I say suddenly feeling frustrated.
‘Is that what you really think?’ he says closely to my face.
‘It’s obvious that’s what everyone else would think,’ I whisper and I can see he look furious.
‘I don’t care what anyone thinks and neither should you,’ he snaps.
‘I can’t help-.’
‘Hal!’ Joan shouts from outside and the both of us freeze, looking at each other.
‘Great! This is all I need,’ he says shaking his head and letting out a big sigh. ‘Stay here.’
‘Okay,’ I reply and step back into the room. Hal takes something out of the desk and opens the door.
‘Hi,’ he says and steps out.
‘What are you doing?’ she slurs and I know from her tone of voice she’s is pretending to be happy. ‘I’m showing Alfie and Jasmine around the house. You don’t mind?’
‘No,’ he says. ‘Please take a look.’
‘It’s beautiful,’ a woman gushes as I walk closer to the door to eavesdrop.
‘You’ve done an amazing job,’ the man says. ‘How long did it take?’
‘Let me show you around,’ Hal says sounding delighted.
‘What’s in there?’ asks Joan. ‘We might as well start here.’
‘No, this room is out of bounds for the moment,’ replies Hal.
I step back knowing if she walks in I’m dead meat and she will probably go ballistic that we were trying to get a quickie while she is under the same roof. I hold my breath.
‘Why?’ Joan asks.
‘I have confidential stuff in there,’ he says then it sounds like he’s locking the door.
‘We’re not going to look through it,’ she laughs.
‘I’d prefer it if we miss this room out.’ It must be a double locking system so I can undo it from the inside. ‘Follow me.’
I hear them walk away and wait before I can open the door.
Except I can’t. He has locked me in.
‘I don’t believe it!’ I hiss and open my bag, pulling out my mobile, ringing his number.
‘Hello David,’ he says sounding happy. ‘Long time no speak.’
‘You’ve locked me in.’
‘I know,’ he cheerily replies.
‘Can you let me out when you’ve finished showing them around?’
‘What are you embarrassed about?’
‘It’s the truth Hal, whether or not you think so, everyone thinks I’m the trollop here.’
‘You shouldn’t listen to people. I have to go,’ he sniggers.
‘Hal this isn’t funny. Open the bloody door!’
‘Maybe you need to take stock,’ and he hangs up. I dial his mobile number again and this time it trips into voicemail. I text him.
‘I can’t stay here all night!’
I check my watch later and I’ve been in this room for over 45 minutes. There is an en-suite bathroom so I’m not totally left in the lurch. Then I hear some more voices.
‘He’s up to something,’ Joan says and she’s trying the handle of the door. ‘I wonder what he’s got in there?’
‘Joan you can’t go breaking into one of his rooms?’ I hear a female voice say.
‘Jenny, he hides too much from me and I don’t know why he’s trying to literally lock me out of his life,’ sighs Joan.
I move around the room quietly to stand by the door hoping she hasn’t seen my shadow.
‘Where’s your daughter in law?’ Jenny asks. ‘She looked very pretty tonight.’
‘Who knows and who cares,’ Joan dismisses, now trying to budge the door. ‘She probably realises she doesn’t fit in. Why on earth he invited her I have no idea.’
‘He seems to like her. She seems perfectly lovely to me,’ Jenny quietly replies.
‘She screwed him behind my back. What sort of slut does that make her?’
‘A lucky one,’ laughs Jenny then sighs. ‘You shouldn’t have told everyone that you let him sleep with her. You know him well enough. You don’t tell Hal what to do.’
‘I bloody well don’t care!’ Joan snaps.
‘He’s doing the opposite to what you want,’ Jenny says sympathetically.
‘I’ve told him time and time again he has to give her the boot but will he listen to me? Of course he won’t,’ she snaps. ‘He knows she makes my skin crawl and how she was a bloody wretched wife to my son.’
‘You should have told Hal
no, instead of agreeing to his weird idea,’ replies Jenny.
‘I want him to get it, and her, out of his system. Then when he’s finished, I’ll get my own back on Belle.’
I breathe in deeply and wonder what she has in mind as I grab my throat.
‘What are you going to do?’
‘You wait and see,’ snarls Joan. ‘Actually.’ I hear her rummaging around.
‘Who are you calling?’ asks Jenny.
‘I’m just going to give her a ring.’
To my horror I’ve left my mobile on the other side of the room. I quickly dive to my bag to turn off my phone.
‘Did you hear that?’ Joan says and knocks on the door. ‘Is anyone in there?’
I manage to get to the phone as it lights up with her name and is about to play the tune of ‘I will survive’.
‘There’s no one there,’ Jenny laughs. ‘Do you think she’s hiding in the room?’
‘Belle!’ she shouts loudly and bangs on the door. ‘Are you in there?’
‘Come on Joan, we’re missing the party.’
‘If she thinks she can get one up on me, she’s totally wrong. I’ll soon take the tint off her rose coloured specs!’
She bangs the door harder and I jump back realising she’s in a vile mood.
‘Fucking hell!’ she snaps. ‘What the hell is he hiding now!’
‘What’s going on ladies?’ I hear Hal say approaching the door. ‘Is there something wrong?’
‘I was coming back from the ladies and I’m sure I heard something in there,’ Joan says, her tone of voice now light and happy. ‘Jenny heard it too.’
‘Yes,’ says an unconvinced Jenny.
‘I left the window open so it could be the wind or a noise from outside,’ Hal says cheerfully. ‘Let me escort you back to the party.’
I hear the voices fade gradually as they walk down the corridor.
Deep down I knew Joan wasn’t happy about the arrangement and he’s got the upper hand on us both but I’m the one who’s going to get the kicking.
I hear footsteps come to the door and it’s unlocked as Hal slips in quietly.
‘Why did you invite me if I was going to spend the evening locked up!’ I hiss.
‘I’m sorry,’ he says now looking distressed. ‘I was going to come straight back up but every time I did Joan kept stopping me.’
‘She tried to get in,’ I grimace and try to walk past but he’s standing in my way. ‘She’s not happy about this arrangement, as you bloody well know. She said I should stop it right now’.