by Sidney Wood
Chapter Eighteen (One week later)
Noah sat down heavily when he read the lab report. The results were indisputable; he had another son. At first, he didn’t believe it. How could he be the father? Shortly after their breakup, Noah heard whisperings of Lisa’s pregnancy. Like anyone in his shoes, he tried to get a straight answer about the child, but Lisa shut him out. According to a mutual friend, Lisa’s doctor put the date of conception at least two weeks before Noah started dating her. He took her word for it and left Lisa alone.
Disbelief turned to anger when Noah realized she had lied. Lisa must have known the truth and hid it from him. “But why?” he wondered. Noah wasn’t a criminal or a deadbeat. Not only that, but he wanted their relationship. If she had just let him know, he’d have been there for her.
Noah waited for his anger to subside before he contacted Lisa and asked to meet with her. “I’m not angry,” he said. “I’m just confused. Do you mind meeting me for coffee or something so we can talk?” She agreed.
The morning of his ill-fated phone call with Ulie, Noah met Lisa at a trendy coffee shop in Palmer. He didn’t waste any time getting to the point.
“Why didn’t you tell me? I’d have done the right thing. Back then, I- well, I fell hard for you. Even if I didn’t feel that way, I could never run away from my own kid.” He expected her to be cold, off-putting, and to deny everything.
Instead, Lisa swallowed and ducked her head. “I’m sorry, Noah. At the time, I wasn’t sure who the baby belonged to. I know that sounds bad.” She looked away and shook her head.
Noah waited. “Is she embarrassed?”
Lisa turned back, a pained look on her face. “When I saw my son for the first time, I knew he was yours, but I couldn’t bring myself to say anything. We were already married. It would have crushed my husband… ex-husband, I guess. I hoped he’d never find out.”
She formed an imaginary pistol with her hand, pointed it at her head, and mouthed “pow” as she mimed firing the weapon. “Fuck me, right? The older Nicky got the more he looked like you, and my ex figured it out. When he confronted me, I told him the truth and you know the rest. I mean, you saw that he’s suing you for back child support, right?”
The two of them shared a wry chuckle over that.
“He wants me to pay child support…to him?” Noah scratched his head and Lisa shrugged. Her eyes sparkled when she looked at him. Noah held her gaze a little longer than he should have.
Guilty, he buried his head in his hands and exhaled loudly. He had to get his head straight.
“How can he just walk away after what, a year of raising the boy as his own? What kind of an asshole does that?” He looked up to see her shrug and wring her hands above the table.
Noah shook his head. “I don’t know what will happen with the rest of it, Lisa, but I promise to do the right thing. I’m here now, and I’ll do my part to take care of our son.”
Inside he wondered how Ulie would take the news. Would a surprise child be the baggage that finally turned her away? A guy with two baby mamas…not exactly a great catch. “She’s married.” Noah shook his head again and forced himself to focus on the problem at hand.
Watching Luke struggle over the past few months led Noah to regret the choices he made. He could have tried harder with his ex-wife and stuck it out when things got bad. For Luke’s sake, he should have put more on the line.
As a combat vet, Noah had thought he understood sacrifice until he saw Luke lying helpless in the hospital. Now he knew different. It broke him. He vowed silently to never put another child through the hell of divorce, no matter the cost to himself. He wouldn’t be responsible for ruining another kid’s life. This son, Noah’s surprise love child, gave him a second chance to do things right. He stared into Lisa’s eyes, daring her to disbelieve his words.
Lisa took one of his rough hands and held it in hers, soft and warm. “Thank you, Noah. I don’t deserve your kindness. You’re a good man.” Her eyes seemed luminous in the shadow filled coffee house. They gleamed as she held his hand.
Noah swallowed, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He liked the feel of her delicate hand in his large, calloused paw, and that created a problem. He reluctantly withdrew. Noah didn’t deny Lisa’s allure, but he knew her dangers. He had cared for her; was infatuated with her. When their relationship ended abruptly, it hurt. For the longest time, Noah had wanted her back. Now, by the look of things, she wanted him back as well.
She continued to look at him lovingly, tempting him to ask for more.
“I uh, better get to work,” Noah said. He stood and walked away before he lost the nerve. Getting sucked back into Lisa’s drama would ruin his relationship with Ulie, and he knew it.
On his way out, Noah put Lisa out of his mind and turned to thoughts of Ulie. That is who he wanted to be with, and no one could change that. Once he sorted out this mess and made some headway toward getting Luke back, he’d figure out how to be with her. Until then, he planned to keep his head down and do his best to field the shit being flung his way.
Noah arrived to work late, and he hated being that guy. He had a good thing going and didn’t want to ruin it. Unfortunately, it was a crazy-busy day and he didn’t handle the pressure well. Distracted by the drama unfolding in his personal life, Noah accidentally scratched a customer’s custom tank art. He kicked himself. He knew better than to make such a rookie move. Wiping off his hands, he approached his boss and fessed up. He even offered to pay the damages. The manager bristled, but he let it slide.
Later the same day, and only a few hours before his phone call with Ulie, Noah forgot to reattach some shifting linkage on a customer’s bike. He just about crashed it before it even left the shop. Strike two.
His boss let it go again but gave Noah a stern warning, something along the lines of, “Get your head out of your ass, dip-shit.”
Reconnecting with Lisa, and being on the shit list at work, set Noah back a step. At home, he commiserated over his predicament. On top of everything, he missed Luke, and he had to play nice with his bitchy ex-wife if he ever wanted to see him again. Noah found himself at the bottom of a deep, dark pit with no easy way out.
After work, Noah drove to his parents’ house to give them the news about their new grandbaby. Noah’s parents were good people, and they held family sacred. Because of that, they had been critical of the way Noah handled the custody dispute over Luke, always urging him to fight harder. Noah knew a child born out of wedlock would be tough for them to accept. He knuckled down and faced them.
During a lull in the conversation, Noah sent a text to Ulie. “Good afternoon, gorgeous. Just wanted you to know I’m thinking about you.” Send.
He needed the distraction. It would take time for his parents to absorb the news, and he wanted a break from their direct questions and criticism. Ulie replied that she needed to speak to him. It should have been a relief; instead it raised his stress level. After waiting a few minutes, Noah called her anyway.
Her plea for help caught him off guard, and he found himself down in that dark hole again, more desperate than ever. He should have noticed her and taken the time to listen; to understand. He should have set his worries aside and focused on holding her through the heartache. Instead, he pushed her away. Rather than taking Ulie’s hand and helping her out of her own deep, dark pit, he knocked her down and threw dirt on top of her.
Noah hung his head. He wanted to call her back, to apologize and beg her forgiveness, but he couldn’t imagine a scenario where she’d even answer his calls.
He had ruined everything.
Without a kid to look after, and no hope of salvaging things with Ulie, Noah headed home to dive into a bottle of whiskey.
The next morning, Noah awoke to the aroma of coffee and bacon, and a pounding headache. “Who the hell is cooking breakfast?” Wincing, Noah climbed out of bed, trying not to aggravate his throbbing skull. He pulled on a pair of discarded jeans and slipped a fresh t-shirt over his head.
Padding to the kitchen in his bare feet, Noah slowed when he observed a slender woman with long dark hair and honey colored skin in front of his stove. As he rounded the breakfast bar, he saw that she wore nothing but a t-shirt. He recognized it as the one he wore the night before. She stood with her back to Noah, humming as she flipped an egg expertly with his spatula.
“Lisa?” he asked.
Smiling brightly, Lisa spun around and winked. “Good morning, handsome!”
“Umm,” Noah mumbled, still reeling. “I don’t mean to be rude, but what are you doing here?”
Lisa frowned, but only for a moment. She answered with a teasing smile, “You called me last night, sugar. I came right over.” Closing the distance between them, Lisa stood on her tiptoes, kissing him affectionately. As she did so, she pressed her barely clothed body against him.
“I did?” he muttered before she had finished. Her body, soft and warm, momentarily clouded his senses. The sensation made his tongue tingle, like a sugar overload, and Noah wished she wasn’t so tantalizing. He recalled flashes of the night before; or maybe they were memories from back when they were dating? Noah couldn’t be sure. Whatever the case, his body remembered her, and his ears burned hot with shame at how much he wanted her.
“Yes. Now sit down and eat some breakfast while it’s still warm. I’m going to take a shower and go pick up Nicky. My sister is watching him.” She slid the fried egg from skillet to plate, pairing it with bacon and carried it to the table. A cup of hot coffee waited next to the plate.
“Well, okay.” His confusion and apprehension were overpowered by sudden hunger. The food smelled delicious.
Lisa beamed and ran on her tiptoes to the bedroom. Noah heard the shower a moment later.
Frowning, Noah bit into a piece of bacon. He chewed and pondered the developments, trying not to visualize Lisa’s naked body under the hot spray. When the valve closed and the water stopped, he found himself wondering if there were goose pimples on her breasts. He thought of water droplets sliding down her stomach. He sighed and shoveled more food into his mouth.
Noah heard Lisa coming down the stairs and he looked up.
She grabbed a light jacket from next to the door, slipped on a pair of heels, and grabbed her purse from the kitchen counter. Still hustling, Lisa danced over to him and planted a kiss on Noah’s cheek before racing out the door. “Call me!” she shouted over her shoulder.
“Mhm.” Noah growled and chewed another piece of bacon. “Does she think we’re back together all of the sudden?” He pulled out his phone, instinctively checking for missed calls or messages from Ulie.
“I’m an idiot,” he said, exhaling in a puff.
Head still pounding, Noah downed four 250mg ibuprofen tablets and went back to bed.
Chapter Nineteen (Mid-January)
In the weeks following their break-up, Ulie awoke each morning to overwhelming. She wanted to bury her head under the covers and never come out. Dropping a class or two would help, but the deadline had already passed. Instead, she did her best impersonation of a living, breathing human, attending class in a daze while the rest of her world burned to the ground.
At the restaurant, she made sure to smile, but her patience ran thin. Unfailingly, by the end of every shift, Ulie wanted nothing more than to scream at the top of her lungs and quit. If she didn’t need the measly six-hundred-dollar paycheck, she’d have clocked out for the last time several days ago. Taking a deep breath and setting her shoulders, Ulie plastered on her best fake smile and returned to take orders from the drunken frat boys sitting in her area.
“I’ll have the special,” a red-haired youth said, winking suggestively. He couldn’t have been a day over twenty, with sparse facial hair and wiry freckled arms. “Oh, and if you want a big tip you should come sit in my lap. My tip is huge.” He winked again, sending his buddies into fits of laughter.
Ulie ignored him, patiently smiling at the next boy. “I have one special. What can I get for you?”
“I’ll have the special too,” he said, acting disinterested. Just before Ulie turned to the next customer, he added, “Can you help me with my napkin? I’m not sure how this thing works.” He leaned back, showing Ulie that the napkin now protruded from the front of his unzipped pants. Luckily, nothing else peeked out. The boys celebrated with ribald laughter.
Nearing her breaking point, yet holding it together, Ulie turned to the last boy, a dark-skinned kid, slightly overweight and wearing glasses. “Can I please have a cheeseburger?” he asked.
Ulie nodded, jotting down the order. As she turned to leave, a hand brazenly squeezed one of her butt cheeks. Furious, she turned around, expecting to catch one of the first two idiots with their hands out. Nope. The nice guy who ordered a cheeseburger jerked his hand back. He chuckled and shot his buddies a mischievous grin.
“What the hell?” Ulie asked.
“You had a piece of lint on your skirt,” he lied as his friends guffawed, nearly falling out of their seats.
“My husband is a cop you little shits!” Ulie hissed threateningly. She leaned over the table, staring each of them down in turn. Disgusted, she spun on her heel and retreated to the kitchen. Tittering laughter followed her.
Frank, her supervisor, dealt with their kind on a regular basis; he threw them out without giving Ulie any grief. She waited in the kitchen until they had cleared out of her section, and then joined Frank.
“You okay?” Frank asked as they watched the three jerks disappear past the front windows. One of them flipped the bird at the last second, and Frank returned the gesture without missing a beat.
“Yeah, I’m just stressed about life in general, and those idiots didn’t help. I’ll be okay, Frank. Thanks.”
Nodding, Frank walked back to his office and closed the door.
****
The next day, Ulie picked up Miranda from her dad’s house. As they left, Chuck said something that stuck with Ulie all the way back to her apartment.
“Miranda, sweetie? Do you know what daddy meant when he said that he looked forward to some warmer weather next year?”
Miranda looked up from her plate of macaroni and cheese, shrugging. “I don’t know.”
“Hmm, okay.” Ulie smiled, pretending it didn’t matter. “Maybe it’s nothing, but it sure seems like Chuck is planning something,” she thought. Ulie bit her cheek and fidgeted in her chair, looking for a distraction. She checked her phone, hoping for a message from Noah.
“Oh, yeah.” She set the phone down, deflated.
Looking at her daughter across the table, Ulie had an overwhelming urge to give her a hug but stayed in her seat. Ulie needed the hug, not Miranda. She couldn’t trust herself not to cry when she felt her daughter’s embrace. Miranda might wonder why, and Ulie wanted to avoid that conversation at all costs.
At bedtime, Ulie did give Miranda a big hug, and to her delight, Miranda returned it happily. Hugs from a child are one of life’s best remedies for a broken heart. It didn’t close the wound Noah had inflicted, but it soothed her. Ulie breathed peacefully, accepting comfort for the first time since Noah turned his back on her.
That moment had hurt her so thoroughly that Ulie wondered if she’d ever find happiness again. She had allowed herself to fall for Noah. She had betrayed her family for him. He said he’d always be there to hold her and help her. She believed him each time he said loved her, and he had lied. When she needed him most, he left her all alone.
Miranda’s hug melted into her, smothering all that hurt for a few precious moments so joy could enter and plant delicate kisses on Ulie’s bruised soul. She slept soundly that night, peacefully.
****
When the weekend ended, uneventful as usual, Ulie packed Miranda into the car and returned her to Chuck’s house. She wished she could take Miranda shopping, stop for fast food, go to a movie; anything besides walking around the neighborhood or staying home. Saving every penny toward rent and bills depressed her. “Things will get better
,” she told herself. Sighing, Ulie put the car in park and they walked up the drive to Chuck’s door.
Chuck stood in the doorway, not allowing Ulie inside. He messed Miranda’s hair as she snuck by but stayed in the opening to face Ulie.
Ulie didn’t want an argument and she had nothing to say. Nodding politely, she turned to go.
“Ulie, wait,” he blurted. “I have something for you.”
Ulie looked over her shoulder suspiciously, half expecting him to throw something. Instead, she saw a plain white envelope extended toward her.
“It is a one-time offer,” he said. “Think about it.”
Ulie took the envelope, brows furrowing in confusion. “What kind of off-?”
Chuck cut her off by closing the door. The locking mechanism clicked into place.
Walking back to her car, Ulie slid the envelope into her bag rather than opening it. Whatever waited inside came from Chuck. The chances of it being good news were slim. He called it a one-time offer, which meant no negotiating. Ulie puzzled over it, eyeing the corner of the envelope from time to time as she drove home in silence.
Deliberating for several long minutes, Ulie sat on her secondhand couch and worried over the contents of the envelope. What if Chuck planned to pay her off and take Miranda away? “The opposite could also be true, right?” Ulie thought. “Maybe he decided he doesn’t want to be a full-time dad and he’s offering custody to me.” Ulie tore open the envelope. Inside, a two-page document prepared by a lawyer, laid out a detailed settlement agreement.
Chuck offered to share custody of Miranda and give Ulie half of what he made selling the house, but only if she agreed to let him move out of state and left his retirement alone. They got custody of Miranda for half the year, but he’d choose which school their daughter attended. The final condition barred Ulie from ever asking for child support. It went on to detail how Miranda’s schooling would work when her parents lived in separate states and included an estimate of what each party might receive from the sale of the house.
