by SJ McCoy
Ben watched her go, wondering why he felt sad at the thought of her staying over at Four Mile and them not running the business together the way they had been these last few months.
Chapter Eight
Charlotte paced the house. Why, oh why had she decided to go over to see Joe? Hadn’t she decided she was going to be less impetuous? She shook her head and took a big gulp of coffee. Well, it just served her right, didn’t it? She should have known, planning a surprise had been a dumb idea. Surprises were her thing, not Ben’s. She climbed up on one of the stools at the kitchen counter and drummed her fingers. She was mad at herself. She wished she hadn’t gone. She wished she hadn’t seen Ben talking to that woman. Wished she hadn’t heard him call her his angel. She stood up again, unable to sit still. What was going on between the two of them? And was it really any of her business? She started to pace again. Her mind was racing; of course, all the coffee didn’t help that. She was totally wired, somewhat sleep deprived, and definitely overemotional. And now she had to decide what she was going to do.
She took her mug to the sink and poured the coffee away. That stuff wasn’t going to help her. The question was, what would help her now? She had no clue what to do. All her hopes of giving Ben a wonderful surprise had gone down the drain, just like the coffee.
She let herself out onto the deck. Maybe some fresh air would help her clear her head. She walked down to the water’s edge and picked up a handful of stones. She threw them one by one into the water, watching the ripples spread. She pursed her lips, thinking that each stone that fell into the water was like an action taken—its repercussions spreading far and wide. She flung all the stones she had left and turned to go back inside, she felt as though she’d created a tidal wave rather than a ripple this morning. She didn’t know what to do. Perhaps she should just call Ben, perhaps she should’ve just called him this morning. But she couldn’t change what had already happened; all she could do now was figure out the best way to deal with it. She probably should just call him, but now she couldn’t bring herself to do it. After seeing him with that woman this morning, she felt as though there was a distance between them. She hated feeling that way. That wasn’t how this was supposed to start.
If she wasn’t going to call him, what was she going to do? She couldn’t just sit around here and think about it, she needed to do something. She checked the time; it was still early, but not too early. Missy would be up and about, and Scott would be leaving for school soon. Maybe she should go and see her. On second thoughts, no. Maybe she should learn from her mistakes and call first.
She grabbed her cell phone from her purse and found Missy’s number. She wondered what her friend would have to say. Charlotte hadn’t even called her to tell her she was coming. In fact, they hadn’t spoken for months. When Ben had said they should cease contact for a while, it hadn’t felt right to keep in touch with Missy. She knew there would be too much temptation to ask how Ben was doing.
She dialed the number and waited. She had to hope it was just the coffee, but for the first time in her life she was nervous to talk to her old friend.
“Beanpole!”
“Shrimp!” Tears pricked Charlotte’s eyes. It was so good to hear Missy’s voice, and even better to be greeted in the same old way and with such enthusiasm.
“What’s going on? When are you coming?”
“He told you then?”
“Of course, he did! He’s beside himself.”
“He is? Beside himself in a good way? Or have I really thrown him for a loop?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean is he excited that I’m coming back? Or is he beside himself because I’m intruding on his life out of the blue?”
“Don’t be ridiculous! He’s been waiting for this for years. And come on, this is you we’re talking about; you always do things out of the blue.”
Charlotte sighed. “Yeah, you’d think I would’ve learned by now, right?”
“Uh-oh, that doesn’t sound too good. Want to tell me what’s going on?”
“Of course I do. I need the wisdom of the shrimp.”
Missy laughed. “You’re going to need to stop calling me that if you want my help.”
“Oh Miss, I haven’t been back five minutes, and I’ve screwed up already.”
“Err, excuse me! You’re back? When the hell did that happen? And why the hell are we talking on the phone? Where are you? And why aren’t you here?”
“Okay, let’s see if I can answer all of those. Yes, I’m back. I arrived late yesterday afternoon. We’re talking on the phone because I’m hiding out in a little house I rented.”
“I think that raises more questions than it answers. Where is this little house? I’m on my way.”
Charlotte smiled. “It’s down Lexington Drive. Number 222.”
“Oh, wow! You’re going to love your neighbors—April and Eddie, and her boy Marcus. They’re lovely people. But, sorry, by the sounds of it, you’re not too worried about your neighbors at the moment. I’ll be over as soon as I can get there. Do you want me to pick up some coffee on the way?”
Charlotte had to laugh. “No thank you. I drank about a gallon of it this morning already. I’ve still got plenty left though and doughnuts too. Just get yourself over here. I need you to help me sort myself out.”
“Okay, I’ll be right there.”
“Thanks, Miss. You’re the best.”
“And don’t you forget it,” said Missy with a laugh.
Charlotte stood by the window, hoping that Missy wouldn’t take too long. She laughed when she saw Missy’s minivan pull into the driveway a few minutes later. She ran outside and was waiting when Missy climbed out. They wrapped each other in a hug. Tears stung Charlotte’s eyes again.
“It’s been too long, Miss.”
Missy laughed. “Well, that’s hardly my fault, is it?”
Charlotte shook her head and stepped back. “No, it’s my fault. It seems like everything’s always my fault.”
Missy wrinkled her nose. “Do I detect self-pity? And if so, why? That’s not like you. Are you going to tell me what’s going on and how you’ve already screwed up in the short time you’ve been here?”
“Yeah, come on in. Let me show you my lovely new home. And tell you what I went and did this morning.”
After Charlotte had given her a tour of the house and made fresh coffee, the two of them went to sit out on the deck.
Missy finished her doughnut and took a sip of her coffee before turning to look Charlotte in the eye. “I’m guessing whatever you screwed up has something to do with Ben?”
Charlotte nodded. “I feel so stupid, Miss. I wanted to surprise him.” She held up a hand when she saw the look on Missy’s face. “I know, I know. Dumb move. Ben doesn’t like surprises at the best of times.”
Missy frowned. “Stop beating about the bush. Tell me what the hell is going on.”
“I woke up too early this morning, you know what it’s like with the time difference. I didn’t want to sit around here and wait until the rest of the world was awake. So, I had what I thought was this amazing idea to go down to the restaurant and see if Joe still drank his coffee there first thing in the morning.”
The furrows in Missy’s brow grew deeper. “Only Joe wasn’t there, right?”
“No. Ben was.”
“And let me guess, he wasn’t alone?”
“Shit! So, you know about her?” Charlotte’s heart was hammering in her chest. She didn’t know what she felt. She didn’t know how she should feel. Part of her wanted to scream and shout and let out all the anger and hurt she felt. Another part of her knew that that was totally unfair. She and Ben hadn’t been together for years and years. Until Sunday they hadn’t even spoken for months. She’d turned back up, just like Missy had said, out of the blue. How could she expect him to have nothing else going on in his life? But, dammit, she did!
Missy shook her head. “I don’t even know who you saw.”
Charlotte glared at her. “Don’t, Miss, please! He has someone else, it’s obvious. I understand you would want to protect him. He’s been your friend even longer than I have, I get that. I respect it even. But please don’t lie to me.”
Missy put her hands on her hips and scowled. “Don’t you dare go calling me a liar! I do not know who you saw this morning. I think I could probably hazard a fair guess, but even if I’m right, it’s not what you think.”
Charlotte gave her a grudging smile. “You know I’d never dare call you a liar. I value my life more than that. I just … I don’t know what to do, Miss. I feel so stupid.” She turned and looked Missy in the eye. “If you had to hazard a guess, who would you say I saw him with?”
“I would say it was Angel. She works for him. She’s managing the new lodge over at Four Mile Creek.”
Charlotte nodded. Her heart was racing. So, the woman’s name was Angel. She felt at least some relief that Ben hadn’t been calling her his angel. At the same time, the news that Angel worked for him seemed to make her more of a threat. Ben’s work was the most important thing in his life; it always had been. If this Angel was a part of his work life, then Charlotte knew that she was a big part of his whole life. “Are they dating?”
“No.” Missy shook her head with a frown. “Like I said, she works for him and they’ve become friends.”
“They certainly seemed pretty friendly this morning.”
Missy nodded, but didn’t comment.
“Come on, Miss. Please tell me what’s going on!”
Missy sighed. “As far as I know there’s nothing going on between them. I do know she likes him.” She wrinkled her nose, looking uncomfortable.
“And you think he likes her?”
Missy met her gaze. “I’m not going to lie to you, hon.”
“I’d rather you lied to me than sat there and said nothing. This is driving me nuts! Tell me what you know, or at least what you think.”
“Okay, you asked for it. It’s been obvious to everyone that she likes him ever since she arrived. And I hate to say it, but it seems that he likes her too. There, I’ve said it.”
“And has he said anything? You’ve always been the one he turns to. He must’ve said something to you. And I can’t believe that you wouldn’t have asked him anyway.”
Missy looked uncomfortable, which was worrying. Missy didn’t get uncomfortable. She just came out and spoke her mind on everything. The fact that she was trying to choose her words carefully meant that she knew Charlotte wouldn’t like what she had to say. “He came over to see us on Sunday after the two of you talked on the phone. He was so thrilled that you were coming back.”
“But …?”
Missy took a gulp of her coffee. “But do you know what I thought he was coming to tell me?” Missy looked about as uncomfortable as Charlotte had ever seen her now. “I thought he was coming to tell me that he and Angel were dating.”
Charlotte blew out a sigh. “They probably would be by now if I hadn’t called him. Right?”
Missy shook her head vigorously. “No, hon, I don’t think they would.”
“But you think they should?” Charlotte’s voice rose higher as she asked the question, but she already knew the answer from the look on Missy’s face.
Missy hung her head. “You know damned well that I’ve hoped and prayed all these years that the two of you would get back together. But you know what? I never really questioned whether it was the right thing for you both. I hate to say it, but seeing Ben with Angel these last couple of months … I’m sorry, but they just seem right together. You know I love you and you know I love Ben. I want to see you both happy, I’m just not sure that being together is what will make you happy anymore. Not you and not him. You two are so different. It didn’t matter that much when we were kids. But now …” She shook her head. “I can’t believe I’m saying this. Now I’m not sure that you’d be good for each other.”
Charlotte stared at her for a long moment. She didn’t know what to say. She’d known in her heart all this time, had never questioned the fact that she and Ben belonged together. She’d believed all this time that everyone else, all their friends, knew it too.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I know I can always rely on you for the truth. And hard as it is to hear, I think it’s necessary.”
Missy raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying you have doubts?”
“No! Not doubts. I’ve just been asking myself a lot of questions. I know that Ben and I are very different people now than we were when we were kids.” She shrugged. “And I also know that we are very different people anyway, different from each other. I came back here knowing that we’d have to take our time. We need to get to know each other again. And at the same time, it’s not again. We need to get to know the people we are now.” She looked out at the water and then turned to look back up at the house. “That’s why I rented this place. I knew …” She let out a small laugh. “At least, I thought, that Ben would be happy to have me move in with him. That if I said that was what I wanted, we could just fall back into a full-on relationship. I thought I was being sensible. I thought I was proving myself more responsible by renting a place of my own and understanding that we would need to take it slowly.” She sighed. “There I was, thinking I was doing so well, being realistic. Instead, it seems I was still being totally unrealistic.”
Missy reached across and patted her hand. “Don’t look so sad, hon. You need to turn this around. Look at it as a good thing.”
“How?”
“I know I must sound crazy. But I think this might be the best thing that could have happened for both of you.”
Charlotte stared at her. “You’re right, it does sound crazy.”
“I know. But think about it, would you? The two of you have always known …” Missy waggled her fingers in the air making air quotes around the word known. “… that you were supposed to be together. But that so-called knowledge was only ever based on the wants and needs of a pair of kids. And, I hate to say it, but it was also fueled by grief.”
“So, what are you saying? That I should just turn around and leave again? That Ben and I aren’t really meant to be? And that he’s going to be happier with this Angel woman?”
“Hell no!” Missy scowled at her. “What I’m saying is, that Angel being in the picture will make both you and Ben examine what you really want and need now.”
Charlotte nodded. “I guess so. You know, when I saw them together this morning, I did just turn around and run. Partly because I felt like I was intruding. Partly because I couldn’t stand to see him smiling at her. I couldn’t stand the thought of my Ben with someone else.”
Missy gave her a stern look.
“I know, I know. I’ve been with someone else for years. Married to someone else. What that must’ve done to Ben, I do not know.” She shuddered at the thought of it. “So, what on earth do you suggest I do?”
“I think you already know what I’m going to say. You know that—as far as I’m concerned—honesty is not only the best policy, it’s the only policy. I say you tell Ben what you saw this morning. I think you should lay all your cards on the table and ask him to do the same.”
“Tell him that I saw him and his Angel? Tell him that I eavesdropped on that conversation?”
“Yes.”
Charlotte sucked in a deep breath and nodded slowly. “I suppose I have to, don’t I? And I have to ask him what his intentions are.”
Missy shrugged. “Yes, but before you ask him what he wants, I think you should be very clear about what you want.”
Charlotte thought about that. “You mean tell him very clearly?”
Missy shook her head. “No. I mean get very clear with yourself about what you really want.”
Chapter Nine
Ben sat at his desk working on the roster for the restaurant. The busy season was over, and things were slowing down. There wasn’t enough work to keep everyone busy over the winter, and he hat
ed that. He hated that there was no way he could keep on all the staff. He had to let some of them go, and he didn’t like it one bit. This happened every year. You’d think he’d be used to it by now. But he wasn’t. It was in his nature to do everything he could to help people out. He especially liked to help people who wanted to work. However, it couldn’t be helped. He shouldn’t be letting his mind go there today. He had enough to focus on in his own personal life. Charlotte would be arriving any day and he was so happy about that. At the same time, he felt guilty about Angel. Wasn’t that crazy? After all these years of waiting for Charlotte to return, for the two of them to finally get another chance, that time had finally come, and he couldn’t fully enjoy it because he was worried about hurting someone else. That was all it was, he’d decided. It was just that he liked Angel as a friend and he didn’t want to hurt her.
His cell phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket. It was Charlotte!
“Hey, when are you coming?”
The line was silent for a moment before she spoke. “Hey, yourself. I hope you’re not too surprised, but I’m already here.”
Ben laughed. “I’m not surprised in the least, Charlie. Well, maybe that’s not true. I’m surprised you’re calling first rather than just walking through the door.”
“Yeah.” She didn’t sound right.
“What’s the matter, Charlie?”
“How about I tell you all about it when I see you? I can’t wait to see you. When can we get together?”
“Right now! Where are you?”
“I can wait till this evening. I know you must be working right now.”
Ben frowned, uncertain whether that was a dig at him. She’d always given him a hard time for working so much. “There is nothing in the world more important to me than seeing you.”
He could hear the smile in her voice when she spoke again. “In that case, I wouldn’t want to disappoint you. Do you want me to come over there? Or would you like to come here?”
