by Pirateaba
“What’s your name?”
“Teriarch. Mm. I can see there is much I have yet to explore. Tell me, I encountered a terrible problem when I went here. To settings, see? And I pressed—”
“Ooh, yeah. Reset. Don’t do that. It gets rid of everything.”
“So I had noticed. But why does it exist?”
“Um. So you can put other things on the device? If you had the internet I mean.”
“Really? How?”
Erin stared at Teriarch. She stared into his multicolored eyes and wondered if today was a good day or not.
“Uh, well, you can’t here. It’s impossible.”
“Ah. Well then, I shall make do with these new…apps. Thank you for your help, Erin Solstice.”
“Oh. No problem…have we met before?”
Teriarch paused. He raised his head from the screen he’d been staring at obsessively and looked at Erin. For the first time he looked into her face, rather than just at her as an object to be interacted with. And he frowned.
“You do look…familiar. How odd. I should know anyone I have encountered. But I…hrm. I think we have met.”
Erin nodded slowly. He seemed familiar. But from where?
“Well…you’re a friend of Ryoka? Or she knows you?”
“She has performed tasks for me before, yes.”
“Oh. I see. You’re her…mysterious client?”
Teriarch frowned, and Erin realized she might have violated Ryoka’s contract of silence or whatever. But Ryoka had never told her who Teriarch was, just that she’d met with someone who was powerful and could cast magic. Teriarch studied Erin slowly and nodded.
“Yes. I am a…mage. Of quite significant ability.”
“I can tell. Um. Are my friends going to be alright?”
Teriarch looked dismissively at the Horns of Hammerad. Erin saw Yvlon was on her knees, still coughing. She thought Pisces had one eye open, but both were closed when she looked again. Ceria was still out and Ksmvr was watching them silently.
What should she do now? Teriarch was clearly absorbed in the iPhone. He kept asking Erin what various apps Ryoka had downloaded did. Ryoka had quite a few games on her iPhone. More than one Erin was tickled to know Ryoka played, or had played in the past.
It was surreal. Teriarch was just…interested. He kept harrumphing importantly, but he was keenly fascinated with the iPhone. He had just beaten up her friends, but he’d left them alive. He didn’t seem evil. More like…odd? And Erin kept staring at him, feeling that tickling in her memory.
But something prompted Erin to break off from her explanation of how to play Angry Birds and frown. The warning bells in her head hadn’t died away. Rather, it was as if they had faded during the fight to let her think and act without being overwhelmed, but now that it was over they were still blaring loudly, telling her—
“Are you um, going to kill us?”
Teriarch paused and stared at Erin with a mixture of indignation and confusion.
“Me? Why would I kill you?”
“Well, you attacked us.”
“Yeah.”
That came from behind Teriarch and Erin. She turned and saw Ceria was standing upright, supported by Pisces on one side and Yvlon on the other. Ksmvr was still tied to the ground, calling out for aid now that the danger had passed.
“Help. I am stuck to the ground.”
“Ah. See, Erin Solstice? Your friends are alive and mostly unharmed.”
Teriarch gestured as Ksmvr sat up. Ceria blinked a few times at him, eyes partially unfocused. Erin hoped she didn’t have a concussion—Ceria just looked woozy.
“You attacked us. Why?”
“You were in my way.”
The sky was blue. The grass was green. It was a matter-of-fact statement that made Yvlon grit her teeth angrily. Erin just stared at Teriarch, feeling that same disconnect. He went on, arrogant, trying to score three stars in a level of Angry Birds.
“Explaining would have been a waste of my time. And this was entertaining, however easy it was.”
The Horns of Hammerad stared at Teriarch. He frowned as one of the pigs escaped destruction.
“How did you do it?”
Pisces was next to speak. He stared at Teriarch wide-eyed, with more respect than Erin had ever seen in him in his life.
“You—all you were using were Tier 2 spells at best. But the style of your spellcasting—”
“Elementary. Any competent mage should be able to do as much, if not so quickly or with the same mana supply. You should be ashamed of yourselves not to have any counters against such low level spells.”
Teriarch shrugged. He nodded at Ceria.
“You should go to Wistram, half-Elf. With a decade of studying you may become a powerful mage yet.”
“We did go to Wistram.”
“Really?”
Teriarch’s eyebrows rose in disbelief. He stared at Pisces but seemed to ascertain that the mage was not lying. Teriarch snorted angrily.
“Standards have fallen greatly, then. Your spellcasting was beyond inferior. That was a decent attack with a sword I suppose, but unless you are a [Spellsword] or some other mage-warrior hybrid, I suggest you focus on magic.”
“Um.”
Erin raised her hand. She just felt like it was the thing to do. All eyes focused on her. Erin tapped her head.
“My [Dangersense] is still going off. Are you really not going to kill us, Teriarch?”
“Me? No. But…hrm.”
Teriarch stared off into the distance. His lips moved soundlessly, then he nodded.
“Ah. That explains much of your hostility. Your senses were alerted by a nearby Goblin Army. It is passing this way.”
“An army?”
The Horns of Hammerad went pale. Erin felt a jolt of fear in her chest, but she looked at the wagon. It was Termin of all people who wailed and clutched at his hair.
“Goblins! What will I do? Fox and Erma will be eaten for sure!”
Fox and Erma? Erin remembered those were Termin’s horses. She stared at the animals, feeling a jolt in her chest. Could they push the animals through the door? But if they did—what if the Goblins opened the door? Could they seal it off, then? But how would they get back?
Teriarch raised one eyebrow as Yvlon tried to convince Termin they had to leave his mounts behind. Pisces already had the door up and was yelling at Ksmvr to help him find a spot to hide it from the Goblins. Erin saw Teriarch tap Ceria on the head when no one was watching. Ceria frowned, blinked, and seemed to regain focus.
“Um, Mister Teriarch.”
He glanced at her, still holding the iPhone in one hand.
“Yes?”
“Can you help us? I dunno, somehow evade the Goblins?”
“You should be able to do it yourselves without my help. Unless—are you really planning to flee?”
“What would you do?”
Ceria stared at Teriarch. He looked incredulous.
“This is winter. The Goblin army is marching this way, but they are hardly filled with adept trackers and they do not know you are here. Conjure a snowstorm and evade them.”
The half-Elf shook her head instantly.
“We can’t do that. Pisces and I—neither of us know [Snowstorm] as a spell, and we’re not nearly high-level enough to cast it, let alone to affect such a large—”
“What are you talking about?”
Teriarch looked impatient. He began to lecture Ceria, much to Erin’s incredulity.
“[Snowstorm]? Why do you need to create snow? If you were standing in a jungle I could see the need, but you have an ample supply of snow right here. Use that. Even a Tier…1 spell should do.”
“How?”
Ceria’s ears drooped slightly, as Teriarch’s glare pierced her in place.
“Are you really Wistram mages? Here. Like this. You—[Necromancer]! Come over here and help your friend!”
Pisces ran over as Teriarch walked over to a large expanse of snow and beg
an ordering Ceria about. Erin stared at him as Yvlon and Ksmvr and Termin all stopped what they were doing to watch.
There wasn’t too much happening. Teriarch was just pointing to the ground at something the two mages could see and berating them. They kept flinching as he grew more and more impatient with them.
“There. Anchor the spell there and cast multiple incarnations of it—no, not like that! Why are you using your mana so poorly? A proper spell is efficient! And you—half-Elf! You’re wasting the energy of your spell with uncontrolled winds. The two of you cast in tandem like—well, that is barely acceptable.”
Suddenly, a gust of wind blew up, carrying a huge amount of snow with it. Teriarch nodded as Erin and the others gasped. The wind began to blow, and as he lent his power to the wind spells, it began to blow down the road. Erin turned to Termin, and pointed to the wagon.
“Um. Let’s get out of the way?”
He stared at her, face pale as the snow whipping into the air. Then he scrambled towards the driver’s seat with the others.
—-
The Goblin army was a massive force, thousands strong. Black-armored warriors marched with the undead, grim, sullen because they hadn’t been able to find any easy prey to kill and eat. Marching in the winter was bad enough with armor, but the stench of the undead made the Goblin warriors upset.
And what was worse, they’d run into a snowstorm. The Goblins grumbled and their scouts withdrew to form a tight perimeter around their army. If they ran into anything in the storm they’d kill it. But they could still follow the road so they pressed onwards until they reached the other side. It was a brief snowstorm, the Goblins reflected. But they took no more notice of it; they had Humans to kill, and other Goblins too for that matter.
—-
Far away, the wagon Termin was driving rumbled to a stop as Erma and Fox panted in the snow. Erin hopped off the wagon and slowly walked up to the small ridge to see the last of the Goblin army disappearing in the distance.
“Wow.”
That was all she said. She turned back and saw Teriarch, sitting austerely on top of the wagon with an iPhone in hand, looking more out of place than anything she’d ever seen as Ceria and Pisces tried to ask him ten thousand questions at once.
“How did you learn to use magic like that? I’ve never seen spellcasting so—refined! And the way you do it…”
“It is one method of practicing magic. I consider it to be the most efficient. It is certainly superior to your…attempts. How have you not been taught the various schools of magic if you studied at Wistram?”
“We were expelled. We studied for years but…we never fully graduated.”
“We came close. I daresay we were as good as most mages, but Spingwalker is right. Yet we were allowed to claim the name. We are recognized Wistram mages still.”
That was Ceria and Pisces’ guilty confession, but it was hardly as surprising to Erin as the revelation that Teriarch was some kind of super-mage. Or an Archmage. Apparently magic, which Erin understood to be like math in some respects, was all about understanding spells. And Teriarch had shown Pisces and Ceria some shortcuts in magic, or things which he considered basic and they considered miraculous.
“Hmf. Even then. Any first-year student would have had such things drilled into them. At least, if Wistram is acting as a proper institution for education. What happened to Archmage Zelkyr? He would never have let mages sink so low.”
“Archmage…he’s dead. He died over a century ago. Two centuries, I think.”
“Oh…”
Both Pisces and Ceria had that huge-eyed, slaw jawed expression of disbelief Erin was used to getting from time to time. She supposed she should be behaving the same way. Did that mean Teriarch was really old?
“Well, refine yourselves with what I have shown you. Your Skills and…classes should do the rest. You, half-Elf, study the spell I marked in that spellbook. It should compliment your ice magic skills. And you, [Necromancer]…”
He somehow knew what magic both Ceria and Pisces used at a glance. Teriarch sighed.
“We hardly need more necromancers. But I suppose your control of magic is quite good for one so young. Keep practicing.”
He stepped off the wagon. Ksmvr and Yvlon stared at him. Teriarch nodded to Erin. She hesitated.
“Oh. You’re gonna go? Um. Thanks?”
Was that the appropriate response? Teriarch nodded regally to her.
“And thanks to you as well for showing me how this device works. Farewell, Erin Solstice. We shall not meet again.”
That sounded sort of weird. And ominous. Teriarch began to stride through the snow, but Pisces leapt off the wagon and chased after him.
“Master Teriarch! Sir!”
Pisces flung himself at the snow at Teriarch’s feet. The old man looked more annoyed than anything else.
“What is it?”
“Please take me on as your apprentice! To learn from someone who lived during the time of Archmage Zelkyr—I would do anything for such an honor!”
Teriarch stared down at Pisces as the young man looked up hopefully at him. Erin’s jaw was open. Ceria looked like she was considering doing the same thing. Teriarch stared down at Pisces.
“No.”
Then he turned and walked away. Pisces ran after him, but it was as if Teriarch was suddenly walking at a different speed than Pisces. He strolled along, but then his form grew further and further away, until he was a speck in the distance. Then he was gone, and Pisces and the others were left alone in the snow.
In the silence that followed Erin wondered whether this was all a dream. She pinched herself.
“Ow. Nope.”
She turned to Ceria, who was pale-faced, clutching the burned spellbook in her hands. At Ksmvr, who was scratching at one of his antennae. At Yvlon, who was staring at where Teriarch had been, and at Pisces, standing forlornly in the snow.
In the end it was Termin who spoke. The older man sucked in his lips, and then shouted as loudly as he could.
“Who the hell was that?”
—-
In his cave, Teriarch released the spell controlling his Human form at range and settled back into his cave. He created another image of the old man with the white beard and had it pick up the iPhone. The dragon hummed to himself as he flicked through the screens, staring at all the lovely new apps. He muttered to himself as he did.
“Is this what adventurers have sunk to? Ah, well. Perhaps they lied about being Silver-rank adventurers. And it was quite enjoyable to be out, although the outside was so busy…and the light was far too bright. Hmf.”
He paused as a thought came to him. Erin Solstice. He’d only gone to her because Ryoka had been at Reinhart’s estate and hard to reach without dealing with her at length. But she had recognized him and he, her. Where?
The Dragon’s eyes widened.
“The girl.”
For a brief second he considered sending himself out into the world again, to ask the girl how she’d found him. But then Teriarch hesitated, and stared at the iPhone.
The outside was…the outside. He preferred his cave. And he had so much to entertain himself with now. Teriarch put Erin out of his thoughts and went back to tapping buttons on the iPhone.
“Now what’s this? Cookie Clicker?”
The Dragon stared at the screen as it changed colors. He frowned, pondered, and then began to tap.
3.31 G
This is what she heard in the silence of the night.
[Tactician Level 16!]
[Leader Level 15!]
[Conditions Met: Leader → Chieftain Class!]
[Class Consolidation: Scavenger removed.]
[Class Consolidation: Tinkerer removed.]
[Skill – Tribe: Fleet Foot obtained!]
[Skill – Lesser Tinkering obtained!]
It was like thunder in her mind. The words thundered in Rags head, waking her up instantly from her deep sleep. Unlike other times she’d leveled up, this announce
ment came towards the end of her rest. But once she had awoken, sleep was only a memory.
She had leveled up. Not only that, she had changed classes. She was a different person than she had been last night. Rags felt it. She was now a Chieftain, both among Goblins and in the eyes of the world.
Oh, sweetness. Rags made herself smile toothily as she sat up next to her personal campfire. She had been waiting a long time to hear those words.
In this world, leveling up was more important than a birthday. It was far more special than any holiday, and in fact constituted an occasion for rejoicing in itself. And so Rags told the rest of her tribe what had happened, knowing full well what would occur next.
A celebration.
Even Goblins partied, rare though such occasions were. It was a mark of a tribe’s wealth that they could celebrate anything. As wrong as Tremborag’s Goblins had been, they’d captured something in their huge banquets that represented Goblin society as a whole.
As dawn broke, the Flooded Waters tribe opened their stores of plundered food and piled wood on the embers of their fires. Goblins ran about, ate, drank what alcohol was available, had sex…
There really wasn’t much to a Goblin party. But it was a time when they could all relax, except for those few unhappy souls who had to keep watch. Rags sat in the center of her camp, content to eat and do little else. That was what being a Goblin was like she reflected; a happy moment was one where you didn’t have to do anything.
Of course, there was some attention paid to her as the center of this celebration. Rags was offered the choicest cut of meat and the best cooked food—although as Chieftain she generally got that anyways. She had her own seat which wasn’t crowded and other Goblins made way for her—again, standard for any Chieftain. But it was enough and appropriate. The only other thing Goblins did was stare at Rags and pat her approvingly as she passed—that got annoying fast for her.
Tremborag’s former Goblins were a bit more formal, however. Rags entertained several groups of Goblins who all congratulated her briefly and gave her small trinkets or choice bits of food. It was ceremony and she scowled at that, but made no comment.
