‘So there was no pin and no map?’ Dodie said with a faint smile.
‘No.’ Ed cleared his throat. ‘Sorry about that.’
‘That one was a white lie – I suppose I can forgive you that one.’
‘Either way, I didn’t wait around to get my marching orders; I took off and Bournemouth looked as good a place as any.’
‘And then I landed on your doorstep and shattered your peace.’
He gave a slight nod. ‘But I’m glad you did. So, Miss Oracle, what should I do now?’
‘Right now? Go and see your mum.’
‘She might be on her way home.’
‘Excuses, excuses. She might not be. And even if she was, what’s to stop you going to Blackpool to see her? You still have her phone number?’
‘Yes. Unless she’s changed it.’
‘Even if she has changed her number Sally Chandra will have the new one so we can always get it. Try the one you have first – call her.’
He blinked. ‘Now?’
‘Why not?’
He hesitated, looked set to argue, but Dodie cut him off.
‘Remember all you’ve just said to me. She’s having a tough time right now and hearing your voice will make it a lot easier to bear. She needs you, and this is your chance to make amends.’
He smiled, and this time it was something close to genuine. ‘I can hardly argue with such a compelling case.’ Pulling his mobile from his jacket pocket, he dialled the number.
Dodie waited, watching his expression waver between anxiety and outright fear. But then she heard a faint voice at the other end of the line.
‘Mum,’ he said. ‘It’s Ed. I just wanted to say… I just wanted to say, I’m sorry.’
Dodie hadn’t heard most of the phone call; having decided that whatever Ed and Julia needed to talk about was private, she’d left him on the phone in the flat and taken herself down to the shop to open up again. Not that she could concentrate on what was going on in the shop, her head spinning with so many new revelations. In hindsight, the connection should have been obvious and Dodie had missed a huge trail of clues, but that was hardly the point. Ed had followed her down twenty minutes later and asked if she knew where the Sea Spray Hotel was.
‘West Cliff, I think,’ Dodie said. ‘Is that where your mum’s staying?’
‘She’s planning to travel home this evening,’ he said. ‘I need to go there now.’
Clapping her hands together, Dodie beamed at him. ‘She wants to see you? That’s brilliant!’
‘Can you tell me how to get there?’
‘Yes! If it’s the one I think it is. Better still I’ll drive you – the sat nav will take us.’
‘But the shop…’
‘Oh bugger the shop,’ she said. ‘This is far more important and I’m hardly likely to miss a stampede if I’m closed for an hour or two.’
It was a clear indication of his emotional state that he didn’t argue. He stood silently as Dodie locked the till and switched off the shop lights before grabbing her coat and securing the front door.
‘My car is parked a few streets away,’ she said, nodding up the street. ‘No spaces here. You’re OK to walk to it?’
‘You’re not going to ask me that every time I need to walk a few yards, are you?’ he asked. ‘My leg is still there you know, even if it looks like shit.’
‘Oh, no… I didn’t even mean your leg…’ She blushed. ‘I’m so sorry, I—’
‘No,’ he cut in. ‘No, please. I’m sorry. Of course you didn’t mean my leg. I know I have to stop doing that.’
Dodie was about to reply when her foot connected with a box on the floor by the doorway, almost sending her flying across the pavement. She frowned, bending down to open the loosely fastened flaps. ‘Oh.’
‘What’s that?’ Ed peered over her shoulder. ‘Has someone left it for the shop? I didn’t think it worked like that.’
‘My things,’ Dodie said, a hard edge to her voice as she rifled through a jumble of hairbrushes, lipsticks, clothes, straightening irons and CDs. ‘Ryan must have left them here while the shop was closed. Either that or he didn’t want to come in and face me.’
‘Ryan? Your boyfriend?’
‘Ex,’ Dodie said briskly. ‘This is all the stuff I had at his house. I suppose I should be thankful he didn’t just throw it in the bin.’
‘You’ve split up?’ Ed asked, following as Dodie started to walk. ‘Where are you taking that?’
‘I might as well put it in the car for now, save unlocking the shop again. Besides, we need to get you to your mum’s hotel and this can wait.’
‘Let me carry it,’ he said, taking the box from her. Dodie didn’t argue. ‘Do you want to talk about it?’ he added.
‘There’s honestly nothing to say,’ Dodie replied, eyes fixed straight on the pavement ahead. It was easier than giving him any sort of clue of the tumult of her emotions right now. There were far more important things they needed to worry about than Ryan’s actions; Dodie could mull those over later but now they needed to get Ed reunited with his mother. If only one good thing came out of this whole business, Dodie was determined that it should be this. She shook her head. ‘We’d been on the way to this moment for a long time. If anything, it’s a relief.’
There was a significant pause. Then: ‘So you don’t still have feelings for him…?’
Dodie turned to see that Ed was looking straight ahead too, her box hugged to his chest as he walked.
‘I feel bad about the way it ended, and at first I thought I would miss him but… no, I don’t have that sort of feeling for him any more. I’m not sure I ever really did. He’s clearly OK with it too, as he’s brought my stuff back.’
‘He could have brought it back to make a point – not to signal that it was over but in the hope that seeing it will make you change your mind…’
‘Undoubtedly, knowing Ryan.’
‘Because he’s hurting?’
‘I don’t doubt he thinks that too. But I know him – in a few weeks he’ll see that this was never going to work and I think he’ll realise it was a good thing after all.’
Ed offered no reply and Dodie quickened her steps to keep pace with his long strides. But then he spoke again. ‘You don’t feel it was a mistake then?’
‘No.’
Dodie waited for more to come, but would he ask it? There was unfinished business between them, and now they’d broached the subject of her split with Ryan she wondered if it was on Ed’s mind, as it was on hers, that she was free, and that she knew he had been interested. Perhaps not now, however, and so she could have asked but it didn’t seem like the right thing to do; it might create new awkwardness just when they’d finally managed to get over the old one. And perhaps not when she considered that he had far bigger thoughts to occupy him today, like having a whole new branch of his family to discover and that he was about to see his estranged mother for the first time in six months. Inwardly, Dodie chided herself. She needed to stay on point, at least for now, and she could mope and overanalyse later when all this was over.
‘Here we are,’ she said, pointing to a cherry-red car, tucked untidily in the corner of an alleyway.
‘The 1975 Beetle?’ he asked. And to her surprise, he broke into a chuckle. ‘I might have known you’d have an old VW!’
‘I don’t need anything fancy,’ she said, a defensive note creeping into her tone. ‘And I happen to like it.’
‘I’m not insulting it; I like it too,’ he replied, smiling down at her. ‘It’s so very you. So absolutely, perfectly, wonderfully you.’
She threw him a sideways look as she dug in her handbag for her keys. ‘What, small and scruffy?’
‘Cute and feisty. With more power than would first appear. Strong and dependable. One of a kind. Want me to go on?’
She bit back a grin as she unlocked the car and opened the map function on her phone. ‘Pop the box on the back seat for me, would you? Sea Spray Hotel you said?’
He nodded as he reached in and deposited her belongings.
‘Got it,’ she said, studying her phone. ‘Just where I thought it was. Shouldn’t take us longer than ten minutes to get there.’
She climbed in the driver’s seat and started the engine as he got in the other side. It was hard not to laugh as she noted how close his head was to the ceiling.
‘Sorry it’s a bit cramped,’ she said. ‘Size was never an issue with Ryan.’
‘Lucky Ryan,’ he mumbled, folding his legs beneath the seat, and Dodie’s smile burst free.
‘You’re OK?’ she asked. ‘I’m sorry but I think the seat might be as far back as it can go so we’re all out of leg room.’
‘Apart from feeling like a contortionist, yes I’m OK, thanks.’
Dodie pulled away from the kerb, emerging from the alleyway before swinging the car in the road to do a U-turn in the direction of the cliffs.
‘Julia does know you’re coming, doesn’t she?’
‘Yes,’ he said, and she noted with a glance that any humour he’d just displayed had evaporated again. His anxious gaze was trained on the thin ribbon of grey sea on the horizon, hands restless in his lap.
‘Good. I suppose you’ve got a lot to discuss. It’s a shame she’s got to go home tonight. It’s Christmas Eve… maybe you’ll go with her? Spend Christmas Day with her?’
‘I don’t know yet. She might not want that. And I said I’d feed Albert’s cat for him while he went to visit family in Hong Kong.’
Dodie could tell an excuse when she heard one, but she let it slide. ‘I could feed Albert’s cat if you wanted to go,’ she offered.
‘I know you’d do it in a heartbeat – that’s you all over – but I said I would. I can always go to see Mum over New Year and it might be better; give us both time to think about stuff before we spend any proper time together.’
‘Is that how you feel about it? As if it might be awkward today, something you might need time away from? I don’t think she’s going to reject you if that’s what’s scaring you—’
‘No,’ he cut in quickly, ‘I know she wouldn’t do that. It’s just… there’s a lot to take in. A lot to discuss. I don’t even know where to start. I imagine Mum will be feeling the same. And I didn’t exactly behave like a good son before…’
‘You’ll be fine.’ She reached out to give his arm a brief pat before returning her hand to the wheel and setting her gaze on the road again. ‘From what I can tell, she’ll be thrilled to see you again.’
They were silent for a moment as Dodie navigated some of the narrower side roads that wound down towards the coast. She could only imagine how he must be feeling right now, the uncertainty, the overwhelming guilt. What he’d been through over the past year or more was probably more than anyone should be expected to bear, and all she could offer were meaningless words of comfort to let him know that he had a friend. She wished she could do more.
‘I would have walked you home that night,’ he said suddenly.
Dodie frowned. ‘What night?’
‘The night we went for chips.’
She gave a slight smile. ‘You mean the night I had chips. You bailed on me, remember?’
‘Yeah. I’m sorry I didn’t walk you home.’
‘It doesn’t matter; I didn’t need walking home. I had my deadly hairspray to keep me safe from muggers.’
‘But it does. It was just me being an arse. I’ve been an arse quite a lot lately. But that night it was just… well, I…’
Dodie could almost see the words hanging on the air, and she wanted to pluck them out and give them to him to speak. But he just exhaled in defeat.
‘Never mind,’ he said. ‘Ignore anything I say today because I’ll sound like an idiot.’
She didn’t push him for an explanation because she’d guessed part of what had driven him away that night. Maybe she didn’t need those words that had dissipated on his breath because the things he’d said to her on the beach a week later had told her what she needed to know. The bigger question for her was: did he still feel the same way or had she blown it? She’d behaved pretty idiotically herself, now that she thought about it and she’d certainly made a hash on the relationship front with him and Ryan.
‘It’s OK,’ she said. ‘I understand.’
He was silent again for a moment. But then lurched into a different subject. ‘I was supposed to have counselling, you know.’
‘You told me that once, I think. You still haven’t sorted it?’
‘Not since I came to Bournemouth. I kept thinking I should but I couldn’t bring myself to admit I needed it; it felt like a weakness, you know? And then I met you and it made me think about it again.’
‘I’m glad to hear I make people feel they need counselling,’ she retorted.
‘You don’t,’ he said, offering a weak smile. ‘I just meant I felt it would make me a better person, more whole. More like you.’
‘Being like me is easy – simply dye your hair red and divorce yourself from reality.’
‘That’s just it. You don’t realise just how you embrace and deal with reality in a way that’s far better and kinder than anyone else I know. You cling onto your values in the face of reality and that’s rare.’
Dodie fought another blush. ‘That’s not how it is at all. Anyway, will you get your counselling now? It might help rebuild things with your mum.’
‘I should, but it’s weird; I don’t feel like I need it now.’
She nodded. ‘You do seem better to me, actually. Since I’ve known you I can see a change.’
He turned to her. ‘Dodie… how do you be the way you are?’
‘I have no idea!’ she laughed. ‘How does anyone be the way they are? They just are!’
‘It amazes me,’ he said. ‘How you can see the good in everyone, and how you’re always so optimistic and so kind, even to people who are arses with you. You always want to do the right thing even when it puts you out. Like now, helping me when you should have told me to go and die in a hole.’
‘Why on earth would I do that? What’s the point in treating people so horribly? Life is complicated and everyone has their reasons for the way they behave. Usually, if you give someone a chance, you’ll see it for yourself and then you can understand it better. Obviously, there are people who are just horrible and they’re beyond saving, but I find it’s not as many as you might think.’
‘I wish I could say that’s been my experience, but it hasn’t.’
Ahead a pristine white villa rose up, surrounded by verdant lawns and rows of winter-wrapped palm trees, the cliffs beyond dropping sheer to the beach below.
‘I think this is it,’ Dodie said, swinging into the car park. ‘Your mum’s hotel.’
‘It’s nice,’ he said, gazing out of the window as Dodie pulled on the handbrake and killed the engine.
‘I’ll bet it’s not cheap,’ Dodie said, peering up through the windscreen. A row of flags fluttered on poles at the entrance, elaborate black ironwork on every balcony in stark and beautiful contrast to the gleaming white stone of the building. It looked impressive now, in the depths of winter, but in the summer you could be forgiven for thinking you were in a chic suburb of Southern France. ‘Take me a month of Sundays and a lot of Crimplene dress sales to afford a week here.’
‘She deserves a treat every now and again; I’m glad Trevor’s putting his hand in his pocket for her. I know he’s got a bit put aside but I never saw much evidence of them spending it.’
‘Perhaps they couldn’t think of a good enough reason until now.’
‘Maybe.’ His expectant gaze met hers and it seemed she was meant to say something else. But what?
‘Good luck, then,’ she offered, not knowing what else to give him. She forced a bright smile. What did she do now? Hug him? Shake hands? Their connection had deepened fundamentally during the last few hours, and yet she was more uncertain of him than ever.
His gaze went back to the hotel – thoughtful,
introspective. Was he thinking of turning around and leaving again? Running away as he had done before? He turned back to face her, and she saw that same uncertainty in his eyes. ‘I don’t know what to say to her.’
‘You’ve already spoken on the phone,’ she said with an encouraging smile that had to look more certain than it felt. If she had been in his position now, she would have been running for the hills. But she couldn’t let him know how she felt because this mattered more than anything that had gone before – more than George’s letter or Margaret’s actions, more than their confused friendship, more than the promise of his new family. Getting his mother back in his life was the first step to healing, Dodie was sure of that much, and she had to help him do that.
‘I know,’ he said, ‘but that feels different. I can’t explain it.’ He let out a deep sigh. ‘This is ridiculous – nervous about seeing my own mum.’
‘A lot’s happened. You’ll be fine; I know it. Julia will be happy to see you.’
‘You should come with me,’ he said suddenly.
Dodie stared at him. ‘Me?’
‘You found the letter. If not for you we wouldn’t be talking at all, let alone finding new family. You should come and see her with me.’
‘Do they even know about me? I mean, do they even know that I know you?’
‘Of course – I told her all about it on the phone. She’ll want to see you because you were the one who made all this possible.’
‘I hardly think that’s true—’
‘It is! Come up with me.’
‘Ed…’ she began slowly, ‘this is about you and Julia. It’s not a situation for strangers…’
‘But you’re not a stranger, you’re…’ He stopped, stared up at the gleaming façade of the hotel. ‘You’re my friend,’ he said. ‘At least I hope so.’
She smiled. ‘I’ve always been that, even when you ditched me at the chip shop.’
A Very Vintage Christmas: A Heartwarming Christmas Romance (An Unforgettable Christmas Book 1) Page 22
