It had hurt him, of course. But he still thought Karen going was the right thing: if she hadn’t been able to stay faithful and committed for just six months apart, what were the chances that she’d have been able to stay in the marriage long-term?
No, standing in other people’s ways had never been Rob’s style, and he played by the rules in every other way, too. He drove the speed limit and he ate his vegetables and he watched his weight. He took pride in his work and treated his co-workers with respect. He listened more than he talked, and he could be trusted with a secret.
Tammy, though. Tammy was a whole different story, he discovered that day in his office. He wanted to stand in her way, he wanted to make it hard for her to leave. Right this second, all he wanted to do was peel that tight purple t-shirt off her body and flick his tongue over her pert little breasts. He wanted to go down on her until she came under his mouth, hot and sweaty and shaking. He wanted what he wanted – what was good for him.
So, that’s what held him back, held him in check: the knowledge that if he did what he wanted, he’d hurt her, scare her. And that was about the last thing he really wanted, after it all.
Rob wanted to be gloriously, fully, unapologetically selfish, but in the end, he just couldn’t do it to her. Frustrated, burning up with lust for her, he avoided Tammy and never touched her anymore, not even a quick hug. Their daily lunches had dropped off completely, and she had taken to spending time down at the stables with Phil, Jake and Mattie.
It was totally irrational, he knew, but whenever he saw Tammy sitting and talking to Phil, or giving Jake a hug and smiling warmly at him, Rob boiled with jealousy. He had never been this jealous before, and he could taste the corrosive, bubbling emotion in his mouth when he watched Tammy with other men. It tasted terrible.
He came to see Tammy today to try to make some peace with his pettiness and jealousy. He wanted to be able to talk to her, and after everything they had been through together over the past few weeks, it was the least he could do. He was sure that she was confused by his pulling back so completely after seeing her so broken and vulnerable. He simply wasn’t being fair.
“Well, yeah,” Rob said. “We have been busy with the new cabins, but it’s slowing down a bit now. I thought I’d catch up with you… see how you’re doing.”
“Oh, really good, actually. I’ve been down at the stables a lot, and it turns out? I don’t hate horses.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. Jake and Phil and Mattie have really shown me some of their hidden charms.”
“That’s great.”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah.”
A silence fell between them and they both sipped their wine. Tammy cast around in her mind, desperately trying to think of something to say. What to say, though? Rob, I want you to kiss me all over until I come? Oh, sure. That would send him screaming out the door in to the winter night. Maybe she could say, I bet your cock would feel amazing inside me. Yeah, that would be a conversation-stopper, to be sure.
They looked at each other, wordless, and tried to smile. The tension between them was huge: Tammy could barely stand to be next to him without kissing him, Rob was fighting to keep his hands off her.
Tammy leaned back suddenly, eager to put more physical space between them and her elbow caught on the sofa cushion behind her. The movement jostled the glass and white wine spilled on her shirt, leaving a dark stain.
“Oh, damn,” she said. She set the glass down on the table in front of them and pulled the t-shirt away to examine the damage.
Rob’s eyes were drawn to the splotch of wine; it was just over her left nipple. He almost groaned out loud.
“I’ll have to take this off,” Tammy said.
“Yes,” Rob said. “You’ll have to take it off.”
She heard it in his voice, and she looked up at him. He was staring at her, his gaze fixed on her breast. His eyes were bright with lust.
Oh, my God. Does he want this too?
“Why don’t you help me with it?” she said. “Help me take it off?” She held her breath, hoping that he wouldn’t refuse.
He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Slowly, deliberately, he set his glass of wine on the table and reached for her. She leaned closer and his hands found the bottom of her t-shirt; they lingered on her waist. Then he started to pull the shirt up, exposing her creamy stomach, her breasts in a black bra. She raised her arms and he pulled the t-shirt over her head. She tossed her long hair over her shoulders and looked at him.
My God, she was beautiful. Unable to stop himself, Rob moved closer to her, then closer. She moved towards him and lifted her chin.
The kiss was soft, careful, tentative, checking to see if what was happening was OK with the other person. Tammy moaned deep in her throat and closed her eyes. Rob flicked his tongue over her lips and her mouth opened to him. He deepened the kiss, holding her head in both large hands. He pulled back, breathing hard.
Tammy opened her eyes and looked at his gorgeous face. He was staring at her with such heat and desire, she felt her pussy flutter in response.
“Rob,” she said. “Rob…”
That was it: that was the end of his self-control. He pushed her down on the sofa, pushed her on to her back, and kneeled next to her. She stretched the full length of her body against the soft cushions and touched his chest.
He lowered his head to her left breast, to the wine spot. He licked it off her warm skin and she gripped the back of his head, pressing him down. He lapped up the wine, then slowly moved his lips towards her nipple. He tongued her through the material of her bra, the lace rubbing against her taut peak, adding to the pleasure. She bit her lip, wanting more.
His huge hands were moving under her now, lifting her, and she arched her back off the sofa to help him. He found the snap, undid her bra, pulled it down her arms. It fell away and he dropped it on the floor next to him.
And there she was, lying exposed to his gaze, her breasts begging to be kissed and laved and tongued. He lifted her again, kissing her breasts, lifting them to his mouth, and she let him. Rob slowly moved from one nipple to the other, licking and luxuriating in her taste. The wine mixed with her sweet skin, and he couldn’t get enough of her.
Tammy felt fire everywhere his mouth touched. She wanted to stay right here, forever. When he moved back up her body and kissed her lips, she clung to him, dizzy. His kiss wasn’t gentle or soft or sweet; it was possessive and demanding and Tammy melted under him. She wanted him to take her, take her completely. He was shedding his gentlemanly demeanor as quickly as she wanted him to shed his clothes; she was thrilled to find a passionate, wild lover under his suit.
Rob kissed her hard, harder than he meant to. His desire was raging in him, and he wanted to flip her over and just thrust in to her body until she was shaking under him, coming against his hand and around his cock. He wanted to plunge in to her until she screamed, to hell with taking it slow or gentle.
At that thought, Rob realized that everything was moving too fast, and he broke away, pulled back. He hadn’t come here intending to do this, and he was suddenly deeply disgusted with himself, for his lack of control. She wasn’t anywhere near ready for something like this, and he was an idiot to have forgotten that. What am I thinking?
Tammy felt him pull away from her and she opened her eyes, confused. “Rob?”
He was staring down at her, a look of cold anger on his face.
She shivered. “Rob? What’s – what’s wrong?”
He stood up. “I – we can’t do this, Tammy. I’m so sorry.”
The heat of his body was gone and she was fully exposed to the chill in the air. She looked down and was forcefully reminded that her bare breasts were on full display, her nipples still tight and hard from his tongue. Embarrassed, she crossed her arms over her chest.
Rob handed her the blanket
from the chair and turned away as she wrapped it around her shoulders. She sat up, unsteady and dizzy. Humiliation was starting to seep over her, and her skin prickled. What happened? Why did he stop?
Rob sighed. “God, Tammy. I’m so sorry.”
“Yeah, you said that.” Shame was being replaced by anger and Tammy welcomed it.
“It’s just… look, you’re leaving in two weeks, right? What’s the point of starting anything up?”
“So that’s the problem?” she asked.
“Well, partly.”
She stood up to face him now. “What’s the rest of the problem?”
He ran his hands through his hair. “You’re not – ready.”
“Don’t you think that I should be the one to decide that?”
He was silent. “I don’t know. I mean, normally I’d say yes. But I’d feel awful if we did anything and you regretted it after. Or if you weren’t ready, and you got hurt.”
“Are you going to hurt me, Rob?”
He forced himself to meet her eyes. “Not on purpose.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that I don’t think I can – can keep my control with you.”
“So?”
“So, that’s important to me, OK?”
“What, you don’t want to be a feral beast in bed?”
“No!” He was shocked. “No. I want to be – tender and careful.”
Tammy breathed out through her nose. “Oooh, yeah. That’s sexy.”
He looked at her. Her hair was tousled wildly around her head, her cheeks were flushed, those plump lips were swollen from his kisses. She was so completely fuckable and at the thought, he felt his self-disgust grow. She deserved better than this, better than to be some asshole’s sex toy for three weeks. She deserved better than him.
“OK, I’d better go.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I think that’s a good idea.”
He shrugged on his coat, left his boot laces untied. He stood in the doorway for a minute, staring at her. “Tammy. I am really sorry.”
“Yeah.”
He shut the door, hurried away from the cabin as quickly as he could. He had never been so ashamed of himself and his actions in his entire life. For the first time since meeting her, he was glad that she was leaving soon.
Chapter Six
Tammy looked at the clock and started when she saw that it was past midnight. Time had flown since Rob had left four hours earlier.
Her body was still longing for his, and no matter how pissed off Tammy told her body that she was at him, it just would not listen. Her breasts were full and heavy, wanting to be lifted in his large hands; her nipples were stiff peaks, begging for his lips to suck on them. And most stubborn of all was her pussy: it was open and aching for his fingers, his tongue, his cock. Her body was not receptive to reason; it was operating from a place of pure, animal wanting.
And apparently, that was the whole damn problem, at least from Rob’s side. He wanted to fuck her like a gentleman, but she didn’t have any idea what that meant. She wasn’t totally sure it was even possible, and if it was, she didn’t know if she wanted it.
Sure, Tammy wanted moonlight and romance, she wanted to feel loved and secure. But she also wanted wild passion and richter-scale orgasms and hardcore lust. She wanted to fuck and be fucked – and after, she wanted to be held and kissed and told she was beautiful and safe.
What was so wrong with that?
She sighed and shook her head. Maybe she’d go and have a shower, get in to bed. She wasn’t sure how much sleep she was actually going to get, but she had to give it a shot, at least. She got to her feet and started towards the bathroom, looking forward to a long, hot shower.
A noise from outside the front of the cabin stopped her. It wasn’t a loud noise, just a rustle of sound, a soft whisper, but she froze. She felt the hairs on the nape of her neck rise, and her fingertips felt cold.
Slowly, quietly, she crept across the carpeted floor on her socked feet. She peeked out of the large living room window but saw nothing in the darkness. The area around her front porch was lit up pretty well with the lamps placed every eight feet or so, but the night was thick and deep, and she could see nothing outside of the golden circles of light pooling around the lamps.
She looked to the left, to the right, back again. Nothing.
Then there was a sound to the left, from the front porch. She jumped.
Scratching, scraping, shuffling. Silence.
Tammy tiptoed over to the door and put her ear against it, listening intently.
Breathing. Whatever or whoever it was, they were right on the other side of the door. She took a step back.
Staring at the smooth wood of the cabin door, Tammy tried to think straight. OK, she needed to call for help. That much was clear. Her mind jumped to Rob first, but after tonight, there was no way she was calling him ever again. Julie? No. She wasn’t about to call her tiny friend out in to the night to confront a weirdo breathing on her front porch at midnight. Besides, she was going to be up early tomorrow morning to catch a flight to Arizona for an important meeting. Tammy didn’t want to have Julie up all night, frantic and frazzled, all for nothing. Jake? Hmmm. Maybe. But chances were he was with Julie. So, maybe Phil was the best option? Yeah. But she wasn't calling anyone until she knew what was sitting on the porch.
OK, nothing for it, then. Tammy screwed up her courage and took a step towards the door. There were tiny windows on each side of the door, long and narrow and with a ‘rippled’ finish, so nobody could see in to the cabin. If anyone tried to look through the windows, they’d just see outlines of shapes, blurs of color, shadows. She decided to just peek through one of the windows to see what was on the porch. Then she’d call Jake. No sense getting everyone up and panicked if it was a slumbering raccoon. Right?
She sank to her knees and crawled forward a bit, trying to stay as low to the ground as possible. God, I feel fucking ridiculous. She slowly raised her head up, trying to peer through the window without being seen from the outside. She squinted, trying to make sense of what she saw.
A shape. Something large and gray, sitting on the porch, just a few feet away from the door. It was very still, staring at the door.
Holy crap. Oh, shit. Oh, my God. The wolf. The wolf is right outside my door.
**
Phil’s cell phone buzzed and vibrated and he turned over in bed. He pried his eyes open, stared at the numbers glowing at him in the pitch black: 12:33. What the hell?
He reached for the phone, knocked it on the floor. Mumbling curses under his breath, he scrambled around in the darkness. He picked up the cell and pressed ‘accept’.
“Hello?”
“Phil! Phil, it’s Tammy. Phil, please, I need your help…”
He sat straight up in bed, wide awake. “Tammy? What’s going on?”
“The wolf – the wolf is on my front porch!”
He paused. “What?”
“It’s just – just sitting there! I don’t know what to do… I’m scared to open the door to try to scare it away, though…”
“No, no. Don’t open the door.” Why the fuck is it sitting there? What is going on with this damn thing? “Go in to your bedroom and shut the door, OK? I’m on my way. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
“OK.”
They hung up and Phil put on his clothes at warp-speed. He dashed out to his truck and started it up, pumping the gas to warm the engine as quickly as possible. He put the pickup in to gear and shot off towards Open Skies.
The roads were deserted and totally still. Phil drove faster than was safe or prudent, but he knew these roads like the back of his hand and he took the twists and turns smoothly. In less than seven minutes, he was at the ranch. He killed the engine just outside the main building and looked around. Nobody had heard him pull up.
&nbs
p; He got out of the truck and reached in to the back for a flashlight. He wished hard for a rifle, but he wasn’t allowed any guns or firearms as one of the conditions of his parole. His hand twitched at the memory of holding a piece in it, warm and solid and comforting, safety and death combined in a single item, one small enough to fit in your pocket. He hadn’t missed holding a gun for a long, long time, but he missed it right now.
He walked to Tammy’s cabin at the far end of the open clearing. His eyes were trained on the front porch, but it was in shadow. If anything or anyone was there, he wouldn’t see until he was much closer. As he got within twenty feet of the cabin, he paused, listening. Nothing, not even the wind. He looked around again. Darkness.
He stepped closer, closer still. The porch was ten feet away, and he could see it now. He held his breath and squinted.
The porch was empty. Large paw prints were clearly visible, and it was obvious that the wolf had been sitting there – there was a large round patch where the snow had been shifted and broken.
With a sigh of relief, Phil stepped on to porch, then turned to look behind him. If the damn thing wasn’t here, then when the hell was it? A chill went down Phil’s spine at the thought.
He knocked on the cabin door without turning his back, and waited. He heard scrambling noises inside.
“Phil?”
“It’s me, hon.”
The door swung open and Tammy stood there, her face pale and her eyes very dark. Phil stepped in to the warmth of the cabin, put his arms around her. She held on to him, her slim body very small.
“You OK, Tammy?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I think so. It was just so – so weird. Like, scary-weird, you know?”
“Yeah. Well, the wolf was there, no doubt about it.”
She sighed.
Open Arms Page 9
