by Chloe Gunter
"Does it matter whether I am or not?" I questioned back solemnly.
We sat in silence, as I stared through the iron bars into the hallway, wondering how we were going to manage them. The sound of squeaking wheels broke me out of my reverie, and I sat straighter, anticipating what was next.
"I thought you both could use a little incentive before we talk next. Why don't you take a good long look and I'll be back for you shortly," Doyle's voice sounded from the hall as a cart rolled into my view, and my heart shattered.
The screen showed an image painted in the blacks and greens of night vision. A woman sleeping in a twin bed, her hair haphazardly tossed across her pillow, an arm under her head. A woman who I knew as well as I knew myself.
My sister. Alicia.
Rage coursed through me, triggering the desperately needed adrenaline I needed to burn through the drugs in my system. I was going to make them pay if that was the last thing I did.
She was mine to love and mine to protect and I would burn down the city to make them pay for threatening even a single hair on her head.
Anorak let out a low growl and I knew he was seeing his own version of hell from his cell. "I hope as hell you're fucking ready Bird because we're getting the fuck out of here."
A loud scrap of metal, the exchange of grunts and blows, the shattering of a screen. The sounds filtered through to me one after another as I heard the scuffle before finally a bruised and bloody Anorak filled my doorway, shoving a set of keys quickly into the lock and swinging the door wide. We rushed down the hall, running as fast as we could before we reached the stairwell.
"Up," I said, starting to climb the first flight of stairs without hesitation. This place was definitely underground and there was no doubt that Doyle had to have heard the commotion that Anorak had caused.
Flight after flight of stairs we continued to ascend, not pausing to check behind us. I pushed my body to its threshold and then some, grateful for the extra training I had been doing recently. Nothing else mattered except getting back to the facility and making sure that my sister was safe.
Finally reaching the top, I slammed open the door and raced along the hallway, coming into a stone chamber with the familiar glow of candles.
I came to an abrupt stop in the room, making Anorak crash into me from behind. Standing in front of me tauntingly, was none other than a group of familiar hood figures.
"Congratulations novitiates, you passed your second Rite."
“What the fuck was that?” I questioned, filled with rage and betrayal.
“That was your second Rite, Bird. One, might I mention, that you actually passed,” my sponsor said as they stood across from me, a dark void statue while I burned with a thirst for justice.
“But at what cost, Whistler? How the hell am I supposed to trust you all now? And that’s what the third Rite is all about. Hell, right now I don’t even know if I want to be associated with a fucking organization who fucks with their novitiates mind’s like you have a penchant for.”
They said nothing as I ranted and it drove me even further to the edge. I felt so fucking done with the whole thing. My eyes burned from the angry tears I was holding back as my teeth dug into my bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. I couldn’t stay there one second longer or I was going to shatter.
“She’s safe, Bird. Despite what you may think right now, we do take care of our own.” They handed me an envelope that I accepted with shaky hands I couldn’t control.
Inside were photos of Alicia. Her at school with her new roommate, out shopping, getting a haircut, the shoots were endless and entirely recent.
“These might seem like some form of twisted protection to you. But after tonight, I’m classifying these as a threat. Stop watching her. Because I can promise that I will do everything in my power to not only bring down this organization, but to make your personal life a living hell. I’m not, nor will I ever be, someone you should underestimate or fuck with.”
I left the alcove without another word, determined to get out of the chambers as fast as I could and back to my apartment that was the only place that held some semblance of safety.
I heard my door open and was filled with relief when I saw Gavin in my doorway. He looked as unsettled as I felt. After the fucked up events of the last trial I was glad not to be alone tonight.
After I walked out on Whistler, I went straight home thinking that what I needed was space. But as I had come home to the quiet apartment, Reed already asleep, the feeling inside my chest started to swell as the walls closed in as I sat on my bed in my nightshirt. I focused on Gavin, letting him be the tether that held me together.
He came closer, burning me with his gaze. In that moment I knew what we both needed. We needed to feel alive and safe. We needed reassurance that in this fucked up world, that there were still some shreds of good. I opened my arms to him and he came undone.
In less than a second he had me pinned beneath him and our lips and teeth met in a clash of unrestrained passion. I yanked the bottom of his shirt hard and he quickly threw it to the floor. He pushed my nightshirt up with one hand, holding it against my neck, while the other slipped into my panties and started rubbing fast circles on my clit. I was more than ready for him and I didn’t want to wait any longer.
Reaching between us, I undid his buckle. I slipped my hand in only to be surprised that he was commando when my hand met hard silky flesh. He grabbed my wrist to stop my ministrations before flipping me over and pressing me firmly into the bed. His teeth found the juncture between my neck and shoulder where he laid a harsh bite before soothing it with his tongue. His hand wandered down to grab my ass before I felt his lips once again at my ear.
“Tell me you want this too. Tell me you need me as much as I need you.” His voice was gruff and more gravelly than normal. Like it almost pained him to show how much he needed me in this moment. Like he didn’t know how twisted and desperate I felt on the inside.
“I fucking want you,” I said trying to lift my ass to him. He eased up and I could tell from the sounds behind me that he was pushing his pants down. I quickly threw my nightshirt over my head before once again he was pressed into me. I could feel him hard and ready against my ass and I was tired of waiting. I couldn’t take these feelings anymore, I couldn’t take the rising void that threatened to swallow me whole.
“I swear to god if you don’t get inside me-” I was met with a harsh slap that reigned down on my ass, followed by his hand quickly massaging away the burn.
“You’re going to take what I give you.” His hand snaked under me and found its way to my breasts, roughly squeezing then pulling at one of my nipples. His other hand found the edge of my underwear, that for some ungodly reason were still on. He quickly pulled them to the side and ran the head of his cock up and down my slit before sliding into me in one hard thrust.
He set an unrelenting pace that had me gripping the sheets in front of me for leverage. In all the times we had been together, it had never been like this. This was raw primal fucking, and I loved every second of it. The air was filled with gasps and groans and the sharp sounds of his hips pounding into my ass. I was shaking so hard, at the cusp of something that was sure to ruin me.
“More. Please, I can’t-” I begged him, at a loss for words. He sat slightly back on his knees, moving the hand that was playing with my breasts across my chest to hook on my shoulder.
“You can take it, because I am giving it to you. I feel you dripping down my cock, squeezing me for all you're worth. You are not weak, baby girl, and you’re going to take every last ounce I’m going to give you.”
As soon as he snaked his other hand around me to rub my clit, I was done for. I threw my head back in a silent scream as he continued to roughly thrust into me, riding out my orgasm. His lips found my jaw before he let out a harsh groan. He held himself deep inside me, letting me milk him for all he was worth.
Suddenly, everything became too much. The fucked up second trial, how raw an
d exposed I felt, how utterly ruined I was from this intense fuck fest Gavin and I just had. So unlike anything we had before that I found myself second-guessing us. I couldn’t hold in the sob that was ripping out of me. The next thing I knew I was settled against his firm chest, his arms wrapped around me in a steel lock.
“I’ve got you. You’re safe. I’m not going anywhere, we can handle whatever they throw at us next together.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead and I snuggled deeper into him, letting myself be comforted for once.
I heard a door open. Just my luck that I had probably woken up Reed with the way we had been going at it. But then I heard a quick knock on my door.
“Charlie, are you awake? I know it’s late but I wanted to come by and see you as soon as I got back.” My door opened up and standing in the doorway was none other than Gavin. At least I thought it was him.
What the fuck was going on?
I quickly grabbed the sheet to cover me and scrambled into the corner of the bed before looking back and forth between the man in my bed and the one standing in the doorway.
His hand immediately went to his head, pushing the strands back as his mouth parted in surprise and confusion. He kept looking back and forth between us, seeming to be trying to put the pieces of this complicated puzzle together, just as I was.
“So, I see that I don’t need to introduce you to my brother after all,” the one in the doorway said, leaning against the frame and crossing his feet at his ankles.
“Gavin?” I asked, looking at him for answers. He nodded and gave me a small, reserved smile. I slowly looked back to the man in my bed. The one who had ripped me open and put me back together. There was a gut-wrenchingly hurt expression on his face that he quickly locked down.
I reached for him, laying my hand on his, not caring how fucked up this situation was. He had been there for me and I sure as hell was going to be there for him, regardless of what was happening. He cleared his throat before gently squeezing my hand back.
“I’m Gage, his twin.”
If the situation wasn’t already fucked enough, we must have woken up Reed because he came crashing through my doorway, shouldering Gavin out of the way. He came to an abrupt stop and I saw him quickly scanning over me to make sure I was okay. I saw his eyes slightly dilate and get bigger only to realize that my sheet had slipped and my girls were on full display. Being the good guy he was, Reed’s eyes didn’t linger on my chest but rather pinned a look at Gage, who was still sitting next to me in bed.
“Look, I don’t know exactly what’s going on here, and I appreciate the eye candy from both of you, but I think this is a conversation better saved once everyone’s had some sleep. I’m going to ask you guys to say your goodbyes and head out tonight for everyone’s sake.” Reed looked to me, making sure I was okay with his plan and I nodded thankfully.
He left from my doorway but I knew he was probably going to hang out in the living room until they both had left. I appreciated him stepping in, because I was completely taken aback by the situation I was in, by the fact that Gavin’s brother was actually a fucking twin.
A twin with whom I just had earth-shattering sex.
Gavin walked toward me slowly. I couldn’t get a good read on his emotions right now. Probably because my own were spiraling out of control. He took a seat at the end of the bed and motioned me closer to him. I scooted towards him slowly, stopping half way between him and Gage.
I may not be able to sift through everything I’m feeling, but I did know that if I didn’t handle the situation delicately, I could lose one, or possibly two, of the best things that have ever happened to me. Gavin leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead, before leaning down to meet my eyes.
“It’s going to be okay Charlie. This doesn’t change the way I feel about you. I know you probably have a lot of questions, and I have a few myself, but we can talk about those tomorrow during lunch. I think right now, you and Gage probably need to clarify some things before you can rest.”
“Gavin, I didn’t-” He cut me off with a soft kiss, resting his palm against my cheek.
“I know Charlie, I know. I’m not upset with you, cara. We’ll talk tomorrow. All of us, okay?” He glanced over to Gage who was watching us intently. I saw Gage’s jaw clench slightly before nodding his head in acceptance. Gavin gave me one last peck before heading out, and to my surprise he closed the door behind him.
The silence was stifling. I kept staring at the door wishing it had the answers I needed. I was being a coward. I knew the only one who could help unravel this clusterfuck was the man still in my bed. The man whose name I had just learned only a minute ago. Summoning that deep place inside myself that I used for particularly hard assignments, the place where I drew strength from, I turned and faced him.
His eyes were already on me, measuring my reaction. I’d wager his eyes hadn’t left me more than a second since he stepped into my room. His ear length brown hair was haphazardly sticking in all directions, a leftover from our passionate encounter. I looked him over, cataloging the differences between him and Gavin, now that I knew that his brother was in fact a twin. It sure would have been nice to fucking know that before.
The differences between the two were nuanced. Things I had chalked up to being involved in a high stakes, high stress environment. Without a doubt, Gage was more intense than Gavin. He carried his tells in his eyes and hands, while Gavin favored pursing his lips. Like the rest of everyone here, they were both pretty good at hiding it. Just when I thought the silence would never end, Gage cleared his throat.
“You thought I was him?” He tried to regulate his voice, but there was no mistaking the hurt that was showing through.
I tried to think about everything that had happened over the past couple months; to separate what I knew, and to couple it with this new information I had learned. Regardless of whether or not I thought he was Gavin, because I hadn’t known he was a twin, Gage and I had still been through hell and back together. He had a piece of me.
“I thought you were the man that was by my side tonight, who wouldn’t let me give up on myself...who saw something more in me. Actually, not just tonight, but for the dark nights these past few months where no one could understand what I was going through unless they were going through it too.”
It was as much as I could say without causing a bigger risk to both of us. Just because I now know Gage is another initiate with me, doesn’t mean I’m going to break the first rule of fight club and endanger us both. He seemed to accept my words with a nod and I could see the tension in his shoulders start to melt.
“I don’t want to make any more assumptions after what happened here. Are you who I was supposed to officially meet tomorrow, Gavin’s girlfriend? He never did say who he was seeing.”
“Yes, I’m seeing Gavin. I have been since just before all of this started. I guess that explains why he thought it was a good idea for us to meet. I’ve been a little stressed lately with everything. He probably thought you’d be a good friend to have, given our interests.”
“I still can be, Charlie. That doesn’t have to change. I don’t want that to change. Even if this situation has become somewhat complicated.” His words started to soothe the coil that was sitting low in my stomach, that pit of despair that threatened to swallow me whole.
“You know my name and I didn’t know yours. How fucked up is that?” I shook my head before sinking down and lying back on my pillow. He mirrored my position and pulled me to his side. He was careful to keep his arm around my shoulder, providing the support and warmth I needed without crossing anymore hazy lines.
“I have a particular skill set that helps me find the information I want. Although, we both didn’t see this coming. What has Gavin told you about me?”
“That you were inseparable growing up together and that you got recruited this fall, same as me. You didn’t start with him because you had an obligation over the summer you had to fulfill because you’re some kind of tech genius,
” I paused, letting the gravity of the situation settle in. “He respects you more than you know, I can tell by the way he talks.”
“Hopefully he still does, he means a lot to me. Not just because he’s my twin, but also because he’s genuinely a good person who has always been there for me. I don’t want to hurt him Charlie, but I’ll be honest. I also don’t know if I can step aside. Not when it comes to you, you’ve become too important to me.”
“I understand, but Gage, this is a fucking mess. I love your brother, and yes, I know there’s something between us too, but this is all too much for me to process right now after the night we just had. Another bombshell I wasn’t prepared for. Can we please table this for tonight?”
“Reed is probably about to try and throw me out anyway. I’m okay with tabling this as long as we can actually talk in the daytime now.” He gave me a smirk before placing a kiss on my forehead and proceeding to grab his clothes that were strewn about the room. I couldn’t help but admire him from behind as he stooped to put on his shoes. I am so going to fucking hell for this.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow Charlie, try and get some rest if you can. I know we could both use it.” He opened the door and turned to look at me one last time.
“Goodnight Anorak,” I said softly.
“Goodnight Bird.”
Surprisingly, it was easy to fall asleep. Once the body hits its stress threshold it’s an easy self-defense mechanism for which I was thankful. I was tempted to stay in bed and to default to my go-to of overanalyzing everything, but the smell of bacon coming from the kitchen was way too tempting.
I shuffled out of my room to find Ramsey sitting at the dining room table drinking coffee while Reed was behind the stove. They were both in pajama pants and looked completely at ease. It was moments like this in my everyday life that had warmed my heart. I’d grown close to both of them these past few months. Even Ramsey, in his own sarcastic-ass way. I poured myself a cup of coffee and added two sugars before joining him at the table.
