by Lea Coll
“Sounds good.”
She ordered two martinis when the bartender stopped in front of us. When he moved to make our drinks, Hadley gestured at the bar. “This is so much better. I don’t think I could have listened to Preston brag about Harvard for one more second.”
“Tell me about it.” I glanced back to see him waving his arms as he told yet another story. “Do you think which school he went to matters?”
“I didn’t go to an Ivy League school. Once you have a job, it shouldn’t matter which school you went to.”
“I hope not.” The bar was quickly filling up with more people as it got later. I couldn’t even see Preston at our table any more through everyone milling about.
“Dean only cares about how hard you work, and he’s really into the community outreach programs.”
“I’ve been really involved with that.” I thought of Gabe’s neighborhood and how I’d decided to take a step back from him, but I’d still see him if I was planning the block party.
“Then you’re fine. Make sure you schedule a few talks throughout the year—you can speak at one of the universities, a community center, or a youth group of some sort. Dean doesn’t really care as long as whatever you do, you’re passionate about it.”
Right now, talking in front of a group of people about the justice system seemed easier than approaching Gabe about planning the block party. “That’s pretty cool he’s so into it.”
“This is our way of preventing crime before it happens—trying to make a difference.” She took a large sip of her martini. “I think most of us want to do more. As long as you’re on board with that your job is secure.” We were quiet for a minute, enjoying the view and the relative quiet after being with Preston most of the night.
“Are you dating anyone back home?” Hadley asked, taking a bite of her olive and placing the toothpick onto her napkin.
“No.” If I added more, I’d have to tell her it was because of Caleb but I wasn’t ready to talk about him yet.
“There’s someone, though.” She said it like it was a fact.
Surprised, I looked at her. “How did you know?”
“You’ve been preoccupied all night, constantly checking your phone.” She nodded to my phone which sat face up in front of me on the bar.
I hadn’t even realized I’d done that. I wasn’t even expecting Gabe to contact me after he’d said he was fine. “It was one kiss, but I think it’s over now.”
“Why do you think that?” She edged closer to me because I was speaking softly.
I thought back to the conversation on the street outside the bar with Isaac. “He’s going through something but won’t talk to me about it.” I swirled the toothpick in my drink.
“But what did he say—the one who kissed you?”
Had I said too much to someone I hadn’t known long? Maybe, but I wanted to talk to someone about it and she’d been a good friend since we’d met. “His name is Gabe. His friend, Isaac, said he was going through something and that he’d tell me when he was ready. When I asked if everything was okay Gabe said he was fine. I know it sounds like I’m overthinking things but I swear, he’s hiding a kid or something.” I wasn’t going to push myself on him. He either wanted my help or he didn’t.
“Hmm … tell me what happened between you guys.”
Sometimes when co-workers asked questions like this it felt like they just wanted to hear gossip, but Hadley’s face was filled with genuine interest and concern. “Not much. We kissed one time.” And almost kissed another time which seemed just as significant as the actual kiss. “His business is in the same neighborhood where I’m doing my community outreach.” I told her briefly about the thefts, the issue with the police department, and the block party I wanted to plan.
“That’s perfect.” Hadley smiled. “You’ll still have to see him to plan the block party.”
“Did you hear anything I said? He could have a kid or a girlfriend he’s hiding.”
“He could have a kid, but I don’t think he’s involved with anyone. If he repeatedly said you were too good for him then that’s the real issue. I don’t think he’d lie about that based on what you’ve told me so far.” Then she shrugged. “But I haven’t met him so I can’t say for sure.”
“I’m not sure I know him well enough to determine that.”
“Don’t you?” she raised a brow.
“He’s hiding something from me. I know it, and Isaac confirmed it the other day.”
“I’ll help you plan the block party and maybe he’ll come around. If he doesn’t, we’ll still have done something good for our job and the community. No harm done.”
Maybe it would be easier to avoid Gabe if Hadley was with me. “Okay.”
“Yeah?” she smiled. “I’m more persuasive than I thought.”
Hadley was a force, but I was glad I’d met her. “You are.” I didn’t usually unload on others, but she was turning into a good friend. I was happy I wouldn’t be alone if I ran into Gabe again. I didn’t think I could handle it if he ignored me or treated me like a stranger. I wasn’t used to being this invested in a man. Usually, my sole focus was Caleb. And maybe that was the real issue. For the first time, I only had myself to worry about and I was overanalyzing this thing with Gabe. It was one kiss.
Chapter Thirteen
GABE
I’d never been so frustrated. Worrying about Zach had occupied every thought since I found out he was involved with gang members. I walked to Omar’s store, intent on asking him to hire Zach a few nights a week. Even if he agreed, I’d need to keep him occupied the other two nights. I could take off those two nights at the bar and do something with Zach, but Isaac wanted to work less hours not more.
My end goal was to either take over Isaac’s bar so he could retire or start a business of my own. I didn’t have enough money yet to feel comfortable throwing it into a business that might not succeed. The only thing I knew was tending bar. I’d never officially managed the bar, ordering supplies, and hiring and firing employees. I liked to think I could handle it based on my observations of what Isaac did but I wasn’t sure. Running a business was huge and I’d never been responsible for anything more than paying rent and showing up to work.
Isaac was the only employer who would hire me with a criminal record. Most employers didn’t want someone convicted of theft working for them. In high school, the teachers were quick to blame me if something happened at school—like blaming me for the fight whether I started it or not. After awhile it became easier to meet my teachers’ expectations—to not study, to skip school, to take what I wanted. My mom received food stamps, but I think she traded them for cigarettes or cash because we never had enough food. Gang members in the neighborhood saw me run out of the store with my pockets stuffed with food. I was an easy target. I had no one to watch out for me—to warn me. All I knew was that I needed money for food and clothes and these people wanted to be my friends—wanted to give me money.
It was only when I was arrested that I realized that those guys weren’t my friends—they weren’t looking out for me. No one was. Inside, I worked hard for my GED and when I was released, I worked and saved my money. But I still lived in the same cheap apartment I’d gotten when I started working for Isaac. I hadn’t really moved forward or done anything. I wanted more but wasn’t sure I was capable of anything else.
Even if I wanted more with Taylor there was no way she’d be attracted to a guy like me with no higher education. I hadn’t taken any steps to reach my goals. She could have anyone. Not for the first time in the last several days, my fingers hovered over our last few texts. I don’t think anyone had ever expressed care and concern for me, except for possibly Isaac. But I hadn’t reached out to her in a week. She hadn’t worked at the bar either.
I stepped inside Omar’s store to find him stocking shelves while a few shoppers looked around. “Hey man, can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Sure.” He wiped his hands on his pants and stood, ta
king the empty box and setting it behind the counter. “What’s up?”
“I’ve been helping out my neighbor. He’s fifteen. Dad’s not around and mom’s always working. He doesn’t have a lot of food and he’s caught up with some bad kids from the neighborhood.”
“You want to keep him out of trouble?” His lips were drawn into a straight line. “I don’t want some kid from a gang bringing more problems to my store.”
“I’m taking responsibility for him. I’m trying to get him away from these guys and keep him busy.”
His brows drew together. “I can respect that, but I want you to know I’m only considering this because it’s you asking. I want to meet him and we’ll take it from there.”
I sighed, thankful he was willing to meet him. “I understand. I appreciate the chance for him to prove himself.”
I turned when the door opened, revealing Taylor in a tight black suit. The skirt clung to her hips, stopping a few inches above her knees, her legs sexy in the red heels I’d seen her wear the first day we’d met.
“Gabe?” she asked, her face scrunched in surprise. “What are you doing here?” She looked from me to Omar.
“I was asking Omar for a favor.” I didn’t elaborate since I hadn’t told her about Zach yet. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m here to get Omar’s notes and the videotapes of any thefts this week. I’m going to the police station to talk to the officers about it.”
“Let me get those for you.” Omar went to the back of the store.
“Really?” I liked that she’d followed through with what she’d told Omar.
“Yeah, I’m going to the station after this.”
Every muscle in my body was wound tight. I wanted to pull her to me, crush my lips to hers, I’d never wanted anyone more, but my mouth hadn’t caught up to the rest of my body. “And you really think they’ll listen to you?”
She let out a breath. “I don’t know but I have to try.”
“Why?” My voice sounded strained and as tightly strung as my body.
“I offered to help Omar and that’s what I’m doing.” She gave me an understanding look. She knew how hard it was for me to understand someone’s motives. That kindness and care were so foreign to me.
“I’ll go with you.” I wanted to see for myself her following through on her promises. I wanted to protect her from those asshole cops. But would they listen to her if I was there? I’d never had a great relationship with law enforcement. I never trusted that they were there to protect me. As a kid, they’d been the enemy.
“Why?” She gave me an incredulous stare.
“I don’t know. I’ll text Isaac to let him to know I’m going to be late.” And that was the truth. I just knew I had to be there when she talked to them.
Taylor nodded. “Okay.”
“Here you go. My notes and the memory card.” Omar handed Taylor an envelope. She opened it and pulled out the notes. “This is great.”
“I marked the date and times when the incidents occurred.”
“Thank you. That will come in handy when I meet with the officers.” She glanced at her phone. “I made an appointment, so I’d better get going.”
“Thank you for doing this,” Omar said.
Taylor smiled. “Of course. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
“I’ll be out in a minute.” I didn’t want to discuss Zach in front of her, not when I hadn’t explained who he was to me.
Her forehead wrinkled, but she said, “I’ll wait for you outside.”
I waited until the door closed behind her.
“When should I bring Zach by?” I asked Omar.
“I’m pretty busy on the weekend, so how about Monday or Tuesday evening when it’s slower?”
“Sounds good.” I could bring him by at dinner time. “I really appreciate it, Omar.” I didn’t want him to second guess his decision. “I want to help him. If I don’t, he’ll get sucked in deeper.”
“I hear you. I don’t want that to happen either.”
I nodded before walking out to find Taylor waiting for me.
I turned and fell in step next to her.
“Are you okay?” Taylor asked.
I could feel her eyes boring into the side of my head, but I couldn’t look at her. I knew what she was referring to. The day I’d left her standing on the sidewalk. “Where did you go that day I ran into you at Omar’s?” I wanted to ask her why she didn’t stay but the words got caught in my throat.
She studied me carefully. “Isaac said I shouldn’t—that if you wanted me to know what was going on, you’d tell me.”
I saw the hurt in her eyes which she quickly covered by looking away from me.
“I didn’t feel right following you, but I wanted to make sure you were okay, so I texted.”
“Oh.” I couldn’t manage anything else because all I could think about was that she’d wanted to know if I was okay. She’d texted and she still seemed worried. It was a little unsettling. Even my own mother hadn’t paid attention to how I was or if I needed something.
“Yeah, oh.” A sweet smile spread over her lips. “I’m here if you need someone.” She waited for my response as we walked, and the longer I was silent, the tenser she became. I could feel the unease pouring off her.
I grabbed her elbow, so she’d look at me. “Why?”
“What do you mean, why?” Studying my face carefully, she finally said, “Because I care about you even though you’ve pushed me away at every chance.”
How did I feel about that? I knew I wanted her physically. I knew I wanted her to follow me into the bar that day. But did I know what to do with these feelings her words evoked in me? Other than caring for Zach, I’d never truly cared for another person. Isaac could care for himself and I’d never been very close to a woman. I’d never had to deal with emotions. I’d steeled myself to assume no one was going to be there for me early on. People expected the worst of me and I’d learned to deliver on that.
“Is that hard for you to hear?”
I wanted to slide my hand down her forearm and intertwine my fingers with hers. The urge was so strong, my muscles stiffened, and I rubbed the back of my neck with my free hand. What the fuck was I doing? I wanted to hold hands with her?
I stepped back instead. Disappointment shown bright in her eyes, but I was so out of my element I didn’t know what to do. “I’m sorry. I can’t be—”
“You’re not the guy for me?” She laughed bitterly. “I’ve heard you say it all before.”
And I’d never wanted to be a different guy more than in that moment. What would it be like to hold her hand, to stand next to her, to support her? Could I do it? Could I be there for her? Or would there come a time when I’d disappoint her? I knew there would. I wasn’t perfect. I wasn’t the guy for her, but for the first time, I wanted to be. “I’m sorry,” I said quietly.
Then my heart stuttered because she reached out to me and grabbed my hand. Our surroundings blurred, and the only thing I noticed was the sidewalk in front of us and the feel of her small hand in mine. It felt right.
She squeezed my hand before letting it go. “Thank you for coming with me. You’re right. The officers might not take me seriously. I could use the support.”
I hesitated at the station’s door. “I won’t interfere. I’ll just be here.” Then I opened the door for her.
“Got it.” She touched my bicep briefly before walking inside. That brief touch caused a roaring in my ears and I followed her blindly as she spoke to the person seated at the front desk about the appointment she’d made and we were led to a conference room to wait. I forgot to be uncomfortable that I was in a police station. All I could think about was her touch.
“Are you okay?” she asked as I stood inside the door.
“Yeah,” I said, moving farther inside the room as an officer walked in.
Taylor stood offering her hand. “Morning, I’m Taylor Leeds, an Assistant U.S. Attorney for the Eastern Division. I call
ed ahead to make an appointment for this morning to discuss concerns on Bragg Street.”
“I’m James.” The officer gestured for her to have a seat and shot a questioning look at me.
“I’m Gabe. I manage one of the bars on that street.” I held up my hands. I wasn’t the manager, but they didn’t need to know that. “I’m just here to observe.”
James nodded. “I’m not sure how I can help you.” He sat across from us.
James looked young so I hoped that meant he wasn’t jaded, and he would give Taylor a chance.
“Let me show you what the issues are first and then we can discuss it.” Taylor pulled out Omar’s neat log of the theft incidents that occurred this week, along with an itemization of things stolen, the date and time, and the location on the video. She pushed it over to James. She pulled out her laptop, opening it up, and played the video of one of the incidents.
“Did the store owner file a report?” The officer’s brow was furrowed as he looked from the paper to the video as it played.
“No, that’s the issue. Omar used to call the police, but the officer that came out said there was nothing he could do and Omar got the impression the officer felt like he was wasting his time.”
James cleared his throat and shifted in his chair. “It’s true. There isn’t much we can do in shoplifting cases like this.”
“I get that, but now that Omar isn’t filing reports, the incidents are increasing, and I’m worried the word has gotten out that no one cares. Thefts are increasing and they’re worried it’s going to escalate. I don’t want to wait until there’s an armed robbery and someone gets hurt. Plus, more shops plan to open in that area so doing nothing won’t improve the situation.”
I was impressed by the passion with which Taylor spoke about the issues. I knew that representing the interests of others was her job as an attorney, but seeing her in action was attractive.
“If he won’t make a report, there’s nothing I can do.” James smiled and rose from his chair as if that was the end of the conversation.
