by J Bree
I just wanna fucking leave this place forever but there’s nowhere else I can make this type of money safely. Tomi didn’t force me to do a goddamn thing, I chose it and when I flinched away he left. He spat fucking fire at me first, but he left.
So I’ve just got to suck it up and take whatever these women throw at me.
I leave the stage after my last dance for the week exhausted and just plain wrung out. I’m due for a night at a hotel and, fuck it, I might even make it two just to fully recharge even if it does make me wanna cry over the costs. I have three days off from work and I can email all of my lecturers to get out of classes for the same amount of time so I can just… sleep. Sleep and lie around thinking about what I’m going to do the second my cash fund hits my goal. Fuck, that’s the headiest feeling in the world. Hitting that number and having a roof over my head, college paid for, never having to dance again… fuck, I just have to keep my head on straight and ignore the bullshit.
When I make it out to the locker room I find Posey leaning on my locker with her phone out, giggling as she texts someone. Her eyes snap up to mine and the grin on her face gets even bigger.
“There you are! I’ve been looking for you!”
I raise an eyebrow at her but it’s impossible to keep the smile off of my own face. “It’s a strip club and I’m a dancer, it’s not that hard to find me.”
She laughs and moves for me as I grab my stuff out. When I head over to the showers she follows me and sits on the bench outside my stall. “If I had’ve gone looking Rue woulda skinned me alive. He’s already pissed we’re here but I don’t mind it. Means I get to hang out with you.”
I’m glad she can’t see the stupid smile on my face. Fuck, being friends with her is a weird but lifesaving thing. “What are you doing here with him anyway? Finally convinced him to date you?”
She huffs at me. “Not fucking likely. Nah, there’s obviously shit going on in the club because he’s keeping tabs on me again. He picked me up from Pops’ and is taking me back to Trink’s place but he had to sort something out here first.”
Hm. That makes sense. Tomi’s been here all the time and I know for a fact that this place is one of the club’s best earners. Probably a whole lot of dirty cash being cleaned here too.
I finish up my shower and I throw on my yoga pants and an old band tee. When I make it out of the stall Poe grins at it and says, “The lead singer is the best kind of asshole.”
I know exactly what she means by that.
Because doesn’t that exactly describe Tomi? The best type of asshole who I wish cared just a little bit more for me. Or maybe less? He cares enough about what I do for this business that he’s nosey but there’s that secret part of me that wished he cared enough to… want me for more than just my body.
Why the hell am I thinking like this?
I drop my bag down onto the bench next to Poe and grab out my makeup wipes to get rid of the dark circles that didn’t quite disappear fully in the shower. She looks at the lace that’s overflowing from the open zipper and sighs hard.
“Fuck I wish I could pull that shit off. Maybe if I was a little less tomboy and a little more stripper-chic Rue would notice me. Fuck I hate guys! I hate feeling like this. Ugh.”
I glance down at her. “You could wear that stuff. You’re eighteen soon right? You could come to the sex shop with me and buy a whole closet full of this type of thing.”
She huffs out a breath and her cheeks turn pink. “I’d just look fucking dumb. Plus if word got back to Rue and Tomi? A fucking bloodbath.”
Her words are exactly the distraction I need from all of the bullshit I’ve been dealing with. “Why would it end up in a bloodbath? They’re only lingerie.”
She huffs out a laugh and stands up, kicking at nothing on the tiled floor. “Thorn got custody of me when I was six. Tomi was fourteen and Rue was twelve, they both got put on Posey watch. Like, kept an eye on me around town and kept me safe. I think Rue’s always gonna see me as that fucking dumbass six year old with a shitty haircut, so there’s not going to be any sexy lingerie in my future. There’s only gonna be rebuilding engines and the fucking friend zone.”
I snort at her and a plan pops into my head. A dumb one but I’ve had a really fucking hard week and I need something… normal. Stupid and fun and something a girl my age would really do.
“Lemme do your makeup. You’re going to hang out with Trink tonight, right? Lemme fix you up for the night, might help keep that smile on your face.”
She grins at me and it’s like looking into the sun, bright and warming enough to sort through my skin and into my bones. Ten minutes later and it’s all done, I’m a freaking expert at doing the perfect face in zero time now and when I take a step back to look at my work it hits me in the gut.
She’s fucking stunning.
The makeup only enhances all of the beauty she already has but with it on there’s no mistaking the fucking beauty in her. The sweet soul and fierce loyalty, she’s going to break hearts no matter where she goes, even if Rue doesn’t want her.
I give her a pair of my shorts and a cami, the only clean one I’ve got but, hell, I think I’d hand this kid just about anything she asked for. She’s too fucking pure, too kind, too fucking smart for this dirty locker room.
She giggles as she shimmies out of her jeans and bends over to hook the shorts onto her legs, the cheeks of her ass on show thanks to the thong she’s wearing.
Speck’s eyebrows hit his hairline when he walks into the locker room, turning on his heel and yelling, “Fucking hell Poe, you tryna get me fucking killed or something?”
She snorts at him. “You practically fucking live here, like my ass is going to even fucking hit your radar.”
I hide a smile when he mumbles, “That ain’t the fucking danger.”
Ahh.
So Rue maybe notices her a little more than she thinks, that would explain Diamond’s hatred of her.
Sure enough, the moment she gets her ratty band tee over her head Rue stalks in and the look on his face tells me everything I need to know.
Everything.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing, flower? Get your ass back in the office, you’re not supposed to be out here and you for-fucking-sure aren’t supposed to be getting your tits out.”
She huffs and shoves the cami over her head, straightening it before she turns around to face him. He rocks on his heels like he’s been shot.
Oh yeah.
He’s fucking smitten.
“Is it safe to look or are my balls still in danger of being ripped from my body?” Speck says as he turns around and Poe scowls at him.
“Why the hell are you teasing me? Am I not allowed to go out with my fucking friend and look like a fucking girl?”
The two of them keep their mouths shut so I fumble to fill the silence. I don’t know why he won’t tell her but I guess the very secret, very selective romantic in me wants to salvage this situation. “I’ve seen how fierce you are, Graves, no doubt you have them all worried about your claws. You look great, I’ll grab the clothes back next time you’re here.”
Her eyes narrow a little more at Speck before she turns to me with a grin. “Thanks! You could come over and pick them up if you wanted? Or I could come drop them off to you if you want? I don’t have a fucking beauty like the Chevy but I could bribe Reece to bring me over.”
Tomi walks in and it’s like all of the air gets sucked out of the room, one minute I’m laughing and joking with my friend and then next I can’t fucking breathe.
“It’s fine, I don’t need them anytime soon. Just have a good night,” I choke out, forcing the smile back on my face but Poe’s eyes flick between Tomi and I until a frown takes over her features.
“You should come out with us tonight! It’s just a dumb club thing but Trink and I are going out after. It would be fucking awesome with you there.”
I swallow and refuse to glance at the dark cloud in the room. “I’m beat. I’m
getting bad gas station tacos and passing the fuck out, but I hope you have a great time.”
Her glare settles on Tomi. “Why are you being an asshole to her? I just wanna hang out with my fucking friends and you’re walking around being a fucking killjoy.”
I don’t want to hear a word out of his mouth, none of the vitriol he’ll spit at me, mostly because I think it’ll hurt so much worse coming from him. I think all of that shit about myself anyway but he’s just… fuck, he just knows how to pour acid into these open wounds of mine.
I shove the last of my shit into my bag and I don’t even think about it, I just push forward until I’ve got Poe in a quick hug. She grips me back hard, even in her shock she’s down for the affection, and then I stalk out of the room before I can get my ass torn open by the utter hatred.
I’ve never hated myself more than right now, than this moment of having something I didn’t even know I wanted ripped away from me.
Another short night of broken sleep ahead of me, I start the old Chevy and let the engine turn over for a second before I pull away.
I see the motorcycles go past as I wait to turn onto the highway, Posey secure and safe behind Rue on his hog.
Speck raises a hand to wave and I lift one back at him.
Tomi pretends I don’t exist.
I fucking wish it were true.
Chapter Twelve
Tomi
I give up chasing after some fucking bitch who ‘struck me but doesn’t want me and I get my head back into what I’m supposed to be doing.
Sniffing out a fucking rat.
I’m not fucking around anymore. There’s not a single fucking thing I can do to fix my cuntstruck self but there’s options for finding the rats. I leave The Boulevard after the best motherfucking blowjob of my life, I swear to God she sucked my soul straight outta my body and swallowed it down that pretty little throat of hers, and I go back to my parents’ place for the night.
The shit I need to do isn’t the type of thing I want to get disturbed while I’m doing. Keely will be fucking thrilled to have me around anyway.
So I get home, drink a couple of beers with Hawk, and then I pass the fuck out. I wake to the smell of bacon wafting through my bedroom door because my mom is a fucking saint.
I shower before I head down, no need for her to catch me smelling like a fucking bar, and when I eventually make it to the kitchen she’s setting my plate down on the kitchen table.
Just one because I’m the only one getting up this late in the afternoon.
“Big night? You’ve been working too much. I have half a mind to call King and tell him I want my son back.”
I kiss her cheek before I sit down, she has every last one of us trained for this shit. “I’m keeping myself busy. You know I hate sitting around with my thumb up my ass when there’s shit to be done.”
She hums under her breath, checking her watch. “You take after me. Hawk always did prefer the quiet times, enjoying the fruits of all his hard work.”
I scoff at her. “I doubt it. Callaghans are made of chaos and ruin, not sitting around with a fucking beer.”
She laughs at me as she scrubs the pots and pans. She’s already dressed in her scrubs, ready to head into the afternoon shift at the hospital. She works too goddamn much, they don’t need the fucking money, but she’s always been too wrapped up in her own busy schedule to worry about something as stupid as money.
She always did say, Hawk keeps the lights on and food on the table.
She keeps sharp and ready to stitch him and the boys up just the second they need it.
And that’s how their marriage works.
“What are you doing today? As much as I’m sure you missed me cooking for you, you always come home with a plan.”
I shrug. “I’m heading on a drive to grab some tech shit. I’m upgrading everyone’s shit in batches and it’ll take me a fucking week just to get half the guys online.”
Keely laughs and wipes her hands, grabbing her purse and leaning down to kiss my cheek before she leaves. “Those old bikers won’t ever figure out an iPhone, Thomas. Stick to simple.”
I wave her off and listen to the familiar sounds of her getting into her car, the engine starting and then backing out. Something I’ve heard so many times in my childhood that it’ll never leave me, no matter how long I’ve been crashing at the clubhouse.
I don’t care whether or not the Unseen want new tech.
I care about what that tech is going to report back to me.
I clean up my plate because Keely Callaghan didn’t raise a disrespectful shit, just an outlaw with no time for the law. Then I get on the road.
The plan is simple.
I get new smart phones for as many of the guys as I can. I tell them all that I’m doing it to bring the club into the present, drag their old fucking outlaw asses outta the Wild West and into the real world, and I make a lotta fucking jokes about it.
Enough jokes that the assholes all just take what they’re given without question.
There’s plenty of shit that upgrading their phones will tell me. GPS trackers on them all is child’s play. I want their fucking keystrokes. I want who they’re calling, what they’re looking up, the photos they’re taking, the texts they’re sending. I want every fucking second of their lives for me to sift through until I’m fucking sure that they’re not the fucking rats.
I haven’t run this shit past King… not really, but I have plans to bring it up with him the second I can get him alone for sure. There’s no point in waiting around, this shit takes time and he’s not going to say no.
I’m in charge of tech and security for a reason.
When I get to New Orleans, I stick out like a sore thumb.
Doesn’t fucking matter. I get in and out of the store and walk out with thirty-five smartphones, paid in cash, and there’s one for every member plus Speck and… the twins, Lyndon and Lawson.
I feel like a piece of shit even questioning them but, fuck, if anyone is going to have beef about our club you’d think it’d be Harbin’s twin boys.
Their mother is a junkie living on the streets of Mounts Bay, she chose a high over feeding them back when they were kids. Harbin is a decent enough kinda guy but he’s never had time to raise them so instead he dropped them off with Keely and Hawk.
Keely never asked questions, just told Hawk he needed to build that extension fucking pronto.
I’d already moved out to college when they showed up but my mom has always kept all of our rooms like fucking shrines in case we wanna come home. It’s fucking handy for Rue.
His bedroom window faces Poe’s.
Yep, he’s been sleeping next door to his little flower from the second she rolled into town at six years old. Fuck, I remember it perfectly. Thorn just up and disappeared for three weeks. It was the same time King was being sent to prison for shit he didn’t fucking do and our entire club was in fucking chaos.
Pops moved out the same day they came home and Poe was this little thing, gangly arms and eyes too fucking big for her face.
Rue’s obsession started from the very first day.
Motherfucking cursed, at least he knows for sure that he’s lovestruck. Poe’s been fucking obsessed with him just as much as he’s fucking gaga over her.
I bet Poe would never flinch away.
Fuck, Angel has turned me into some whiny bitch. I need to man the fuck up and take care of club business. Then maybe I’ll go find some biker bitch to fuck the memory of Angel’s mouth away.
Great plan.
Except that the fucking thought of someone else doesn’t interest my dick at all. Fuck, I need to go ask Hellion how long it took him to fuck Georgie outta his system because there’s no fucking way I’m taking up celibacy.
I get the new phones back home and stash them away in the gun safe in my room.
Trink is home and listening to shitty rock music in her room, if she sees the phones there’s no way she’ll leave them alone. She’s been such a
bitch lately I have no doubt she’ll be in here snooping around the second I leave.
I bang on her door on the way out. “Are you coming to the clubhouse tonight or what?”
The music cuts off and she flings open the door. She looks like hell, makeup running down her face and her nose is all puffy.
“What the fuck happened to you?”
Her eyes narrow at me. “What the fuck do you think? I’m fucking cursed!”
Jesus Christ. “Girls don’t get fucking ‘struck, what’s happened?”
She rolls her eyes at me and collapses back on her bed. There’s shit everywhere, cups and plates on every surface and dirty clothes all over the floor.
Keely would have a fucking heart attack at the sight of it.
“I’m not talking about the stupid fucking curse! Not everything is about you Callaghan men, for fuck’s sake! I’m so sick of this stupid family.”
I tip my head back and pray for the patience to get through this without snapping at her childish ass. “Why are you cursed then, Trink? Tell me.”
She sniffs from the bed. Shit must be bad if she’s crying, she’s not exactly the type to let her brother see her crying.
Probably because the first boy to break her heart is still breathing through a fucking tube.
Zero regrets about that.
Fucking nothing.
“I can’t tell you. Let’s just say my last name is ruining everything. Fucking everything! It’s not fucking fair that being a Callaghan has set you up for life and I’m being cut off at the fucking knees by it. It’s bullshit. I should just give up and find some guy to knock me up. That worked out for Mom.”
Deep breaths.
Deep, deep motherfucking breaths.
“Trink, tell me what the fuck is wrong and I’ll fix it. Simple as that, when have I ever let you down?”
She scoffs at me. “Fix it? What, by sending Speck after me to spy on what I’m doing? Making Law and Lyn fucking stalk me at school? Fuck, even Poe tells you what I’m fucking doing. When do I get to own my own life, Tomi? When do I get to make my own decisions?”
