Vittorio Lanza, the senior editor of Florence’s local newspaper, La Toscana, had recently joined FAF and agreed to enclose the Resistance newspapers within the pages of their paper. The newspapers were distributed in this fashion twice a week. Ever since Maria had come on board to help in writing the articles, FAF was able to produce an issue three times a week. Immediately, she had thrown herself into the work, often staying up late at night to complete writing the newspaper and other literature they distributed. Then, whenever she had free time and could get away from home, she would take her bike and distribute FAF’s newspapers. But it was becoming more difficult to evade her family’s suspicion. Enza had been the first one to question Maria as to where she was going. Then, it was Michele. Though he didn’t accuse her of lying whenever she used the excuse that she was meeting friends, he gave her a warning and had said, “The deeper you enmesh yourself, the more there is no turning back.”
His words resonated with Maria, and she often thought of them when she was out distributing the newspapers. Though she had become less afraid and more emboldened, at times her mind still strayed to the fact that what they were doing was very dangerous. But she knew there was no quitting now—for she believed too much in the Resistance, and she could not let the organization or Franco down. But more important, she couldn’t let her fellow Florentines and her country down.
“Halt!”
Maria had been so lost in her thoughts that she hadn’t seen the German soldier who was holding his hand up and blocking her path a few feet ahead. She came to an abrupt stop. Her heart dropped to her stomach.
“Guten Tag, Herr.” As she wished the soldier good morning, she did her best to smile and not show her fear. Franco had taught her a few key German phrases so that if she ran into any soldiers she could immediately ingratiate herself by showing she knew some of their language.
“May I see your newspaper, Fräulein?”
Maria swallowed hard before handing the newspaper over. Her mind raced as she thought of ways to extricate herself from this situation. Then, a thought came to her. Before letting go of the newspaper, she lightly brushed her fingers along the soldier’s hand. He looked up, slightly startled. She deepened her smile.
“It is a beautiful afternoon. Will you be taking a break soon?”
Maria’s voice sounded foreign to her as she flirted with the soldier. Thankfully, he was young, probably in his early twenties. Though she was twenty-eight, she was often told she looked much younger.
“Nein. I won’t be off until late tonight.” He frowned as his eyes scanned Maria from head to toe.
Maria silently thanked God. She didn’t know what she would do if he asked her to have espresso with him at one of the cafés. It had become commonplace for Italian women to entertain the German soldiers. A few of the women did it out of fear when approached by the Nazis. But others solicited the soldiers, hoping they could gain special favor with them and receive more ration cards.
He returned his attention to the newspaper as he flipped through a few pages. Sweat began forming along her hairline, and she was grateful she’d worn a scarf over her head. The seconds seemed to tick by painfully slow as she waited for him to finish inspecting the newspaper. Since FAF’s own newspaper was much smaller than La Toscana, Vittorio had stapled it toward the back so that it wouldn’t easily fall out in such a situation as the one Maria was now finding herself in. Maria hoped that the soldier’s inspection would be brief, and he wouldn’t peruse the paper to the end. Her heart beat rapidly, and her chest felt constricted, making it harder for her to breathe normally.
“That is too bad. I would have liked to share an espresso with you.” She hoped the slight tremor she heard in her voice wasn’t apparent to the soldier.
He glanced up and finally smiled. “You are too kind. Do you normally travel this route to deliver your newspapers?”
Maria nodded, tilting her head slightly as she met his gaze.
“Perhaps next time. I will keep my eyes open for you. Enjoy the rest of your day, Fräulein. Ciao!” He handed the newspaper back to Maria. This time he held her hand for a moment before completely relinquishing the paper.
“Ciao.” She waited until he walked away before pedaling away.
It wasn’t until she reached the corner of the very long street that she realized how fast she’d been pedaling. Glancing over her shoulder, she was relieved to see the soldier was nowhere in sight. She still had a few more newspapers to deliver, but her nerves were too jolted. She quickly made her way to FAF’s office. Her heart wouldn’t stop pounding.
Jumping off her bike, she let it fall to the ground as she ran down the alleyway of the abandoned church. Removing the bush that concealed the basement door, she lifted the door, but had to put all of her weight into it. Her arms were shaking badly. Before closing the door, she propped the bush as best she could over it. Running down the steps, she miscalculated the last step and fell to the ground. Her head banged against the door that led to the office’s interior. Standing up, she rubbed her forehead as she knocked on the door in the code that was used. She waited for a few seconds, but no one answered. She tried once more. Finally, she heard footsteps coming to the door. Franco opened it.
“Maria, what’s the matter?” Franco’s eyes widened in alarm when he saw her.
Her scarf had fallen off her head, and strands of her hair clung to her cheeks. When she reached up to straighten her hair, she felt something warm and sticky on her forehead. She pulled her hand away and saw there was some blood.
“I didn’t see the last step and fell.”
“It’s not just your disheveled appearance and the cut on your head. You are as pale as a sheet.” Franco then noticed she was carrying the tote with several newspapers in it.
“Were you stopped?”
Maria nodded.
“Come in, come in.” He put his arm around her shoulders as he guided her into the office.
Maria hoped he didn’t notice how badly she was shaking. She didn’t want him to think she was a coward. Tears began filling her eyes, but she forced them back. Once she and Franco entered the office, she was relieved to find no one else was around. It was bad enough Franco was seeing her like this. If the others saw her in this state they might think she was too fragile to do the work. The admiration she’d received from the partisans had given her a sense of fulfillment and the feeling that she was making a valuable contribution.
Franco pulled the chair out from his desk. “Sit down. I’ll get you a drink.”
“Grazie,” Maria managed to say in little more than a whisper. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, willing her nerves to calm down.
Untying her scarf with one hand, she used her free hand to reach into her purse and take out her compact. After inspecting the cut on her head in the mirror, she saw it was nothing more than a scratch, and it had already stopped bleeding. She was about to use her scarf to wipe the blood that had smeared onto her face when Franco returned.
“Wait. Don’t ruin your scarf.” He knelt down by her side and dabbed at her cut with a wet kitchen towel. He then gently cleaned the blood and dirt off her face.
Maria could feel his breath on her, and the warmth of it immediately comforted her.
When he was done, his eyes met hers. “Better?”
She smiled. “Grazie. I’m sorry to have frightened you. I am fine.”
“Here. Drink this.” He handed her a shot glass filled to the brim with liquor.
Maria took a sip. It was grappa. She had never cared for it though Papà and Michele drank it. But now she greedily swallowed it, letting it burn her throat. Franco reached over to his desk where he had placed the bottle of grappa and filled her glass once more. She hesitated for a moment as she pondered returning home in an inebriated state, but right now all she cared about was regaining control of her nerves. Before she could change her mind, she downed the second glass of grappa as well.
Franco laughed. “I see you like your liquor.”
/>
She blushed. “Actually, I hate grappa. I’ve never had more than a sip here and there.”
Franco looked at her thoughtfully as he patted her hand. “You never had a need for it like you did today. That is when most of us learn to enjoy our liquor for the first time. Are you now feeling better?”
“Si, si. I’m sorry, Franco, but I didn’t finish distributing the rest of the newspapers. I’ll do so before I return home.”
“Don’t worry about it. I can deliver them. You should go home and get some rest. But please, tell me what happened first.”
“I was stopped by a German soldier. Naturally, he wanted to see one of the newspapers. But thank God, he didn’t find our newspaper.”
“Did he . . .” Franco paused before continuing. “Did . . . Is that all he did? Look through the newspaper?” Franco’s eyes filled with worry as his gaze shifted to Maria’s clothes.
She glanced down at her shirtwaist dress and noticed the top button of her dress was undone. It must’ve opened when she fell. She reached up and quickly fastened the button.
“Of course all he did was examine the newspaper.” Her cheeks burned as she remembered how she’d flirted with him. She saw Franco still looking questioningly at her. He didn’t believe her. “My dress must’ve opened up when I fell down the basement stairs.”
“I’m sorry, Maria. I didn’t mean to offend you with my questioning, but I had to ask. They’re capable of anything.”
She nodded.
“Maybe you shouldn’t deliver the newspapers anymore. We have other people who can do that. Just focus on writing the articles.”
Maria quickly shook her head. “No. I want to continue. Please don’t let what happened today worry you. I will be fine. I handled it, didn’t I?”
She regretted her words as soon she’d uttered them. Franco looked at her once more questioningly, but thankfully dropped the subject.
“We’ll talk about this more tomorrow. You need to go home and get some rest. I will accompany you.”
“You don’t have a bicycle.”
“I’ll ride your bike, and you can ride behind me. Your hands are still shaking. I wouldn’t want you getting into an accident. Don’t try to say no. I insist.”
He stood up and grabbed his wallet and keys from the top drawer of the desk. Maria followed him out of the office. Once they stepped outside, he placed his arm around her shoulders again. She felt safe with him. If only he could be by her side when she was delivering the newspapers, she would never worry.
Franco held Maria’s bike as he waited for her to get on. When he got on, she placed her hands on either side of his waist.
“Wrap your arms fully around my waist. I wouldn’t want you to fall again.” He said it in a teasing manner.
After a few minutes of riding, she felt herself finally relaxing enough to rest the side of her face against his back. She closed her eyes and felt the warmth from Franco’s body and the breeze blowing through her hair.
“It’s a nice evening.” Franco finally broke the silence that had ensued from the moment they left FAF’s office.
“Si, it is.”
“These days it can be hard to try to take pleasure in small delights such as these. There is so much to worry about. But we should be taking every possible moment to appreciate nature and the few good things we still have in our lives like each other.” Franco’s voice sounded sad.
Maria hesitated for a moment before asking him her next question, but it was one she’d wanted to ask him ever since the Italian armistice had been signed and FAF had redirected its focus to ousting the Germans from Florence.
“Are you now involved in the more dangerous aspects of the Resistance?”
Though they’d been dating for almost two months now, she felt much closer to him than she ever had. Perhaps it was because of his seeing her afraid earlier and in a vulnerable state. And his caring attitude toward her afterward had made Maria feel like she could ask him anything.
Franco didn’t answer immediately. She waited, wondering if he would. His continued silence only convinced her he was already doing dangerous work. But then he said, “Not yet. But that will change at some point. You have to remember, Maria, whether one of our members is planting an explosive or writing and publishing our newspapers, the work is all dangerous. And as you know, I have already been arrested, and others have been tortured, exiled, or even killed. That was when we were fighting against the Fascists, but it is a whole other story with the Nazis, as I’m sure you’re aware.”
Maria swallowed hard. After the atrocities the Nazis had committed against the Jews across Europe, she didn’t want to think what could happen to Franco or any of them if they were caught. This was all so crazy! Was she really living in this world and risking not only her life, but also the lives of her family? Or had she been dreaming these past few months as she became involved with FAF and dug herself deeper into its trenches? While she knew there was no going back—it just wasn’t a choice for her anymore—she still at times, like now, questioned the sanity of it all. But she didn’t want to remain passive any longer, the way she’d been before she met Franco.
“Franco, I know you told me before that you are afraid at times, but has your fear increased ever since the Germans occupied Florence and now that the work at FAF has become more dangerous than ever?”
Franco was silent for a few seconds, and Maria knew he was thinking how best to answer her so that he didn’t frighten her. He’d told her one night when they had gone for a passeggiata along the Ponte Vecchio that he would never lie to her, and that he believed in honesty always—except of course when dealing with the enemy. So she knew that, while he was now trying to find a way to answer her in a manner that wouldn’t scare her, he would not lie to her.
“We can’t let fear stop us, Maria. Too much is at stake. If we ever hope to see a free Italy again, we cannot let fear consume us. Instead of seeing my Resistance work as a choice, I see it as a requirement. This is what I must do. I must go forward or else I would never be able to live with myself, knowing I hadn’t done all I could to stop the Germans. I wish I could tell you not to be afraid and not to worry about me—or even yourself—but I cannot. All I can assure you of is that we are doing the right thing. I feel that more so than ever. However, as I have told you before, if you decided to stop working with us, I would understand and would never think differently of you. I want you in my life—whether you are part of FAF or not. And, if anything, I have become more afraid because I’m worried about your getting hurt and losing you. In fact, I would be immensely relieved if you did decide to quit.”
“I’m touched, Franco. But I am proud of my country and of being Italian. I don’t want us to continue living under German rule. I sense things will get worse with them here in Florence now. How could I live with myself if I quit now and did nothing while the man I love is risking his life to keep me safe and protect the future of Italy?”
“You love me?” Franco stopped pedaling, placing his feet on the ground as he looked at her over his shoulder.
Maria had been so wrapped up in what she was saying that she hadn’t realized she’d told him she loved him. For a second, she felt embarrassed, but then she quickly pushed the feeling away. It was true, so why should she pretend that she hadn’t said it? If Franco didn’t feel the same way about her, that wouldn’t invalidate her love for him. So she looked him directly in the eyes and said, “Si. Ti voglio bene molto, Franco.”
He got off the bike and took Maria’s hand, helping her off the bicycle, and led her under a tree. She leaned back against the tree as Franco took her face in both of his hands and kissed her. It was the most rapturous kiss they’d ever shared, even though they had already made love a few weeks ago.
Franco stopped kissing her and stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. He looked at her, and she could see desire filling his eyes. But then his eyes glistened. She was stunned as she saw a tear slide down his face.
“I love you very muc
h, Maria Rossi. I know there will never be another woman for me. I want to keep telling you over and over again how much I love you. I knew I loved you from the moment I saw you walking through the sunflower garden.”
“And I will never love another man as I love you. I’ve never met anyone as brave as you, Franco, and I know I never will meet anyone braver.”
He shook his head. “I should have told you sooner that I loved you, but I was afraid of becoming even closer to you and afraid of being separated from you if I got arrested again or . . .” He averted his gaze, shutting his eyes tightly.
Maria wrapped her arms around his waist and held him fiercely. Neither said anything as they held each other. Finally, she pulled away and looked at her watch.
“I need to get home before everyone gets worried.”
Franco nodded his head and kissed her one more time softly. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they walked over to the bike. He helped her on, and as they rode the rest of the way back to her house, her brother’s words came back to her: The deeper you enmesh yourself, the more there is no turning back. Clearly, there was no turning back for Franco—or for herself. They had both just resolved that even more. And now that they had expressed their love to each other, there was no way Maria was going to leave Franco’s side in his fight against the Germans. For if they only had a short time together, she wanted to be with him as much as possible.
Soon, they were approaching her house, but Maria wasn’t ready to say good-bye just yet.
“Let’s walk the rest of the way.”
Franco glanced at her over his shoulder, surprise etched across his features, but he shrugged and said, “Va bene.”
He walked her bike up the steep incline of the long street Maria’s house was located on. Maria crossed her arms. How she wished things were different and that the world wasn’t at war. If only Franco weren’t escorting her home because he was worried for her safety. She wished instead that their only worries were about what they would eat for dinner at one of the trattorie and if her family would approve of Franco.
The Sunflower Girl Page 18
