I pulled on a robe and collapsed onto my bed, feeling woozy and astonished. I had absolutely no idea where the tryst on the beach had come from, since Thorne and I had both made it very clear we neither liked nor respected each other, but whatever the cause, I was now utterly drunk on desire, addicted to touch. It was a frightening sensation, because when I felt like this it inevitably led to destruction of some kind. Passion took its place in my heart and burnt so hot and so fierce that it ravaged my entirety, burnt out and left nothing in its wake. I grew so fixated on things that I crushed them within my excited, giddy hands, and then there was nothing left of them.
I had to be very, very careful. Which was a problem because, regrettably, I was the least careful person in the whole entire world.
When Isadora crept into the room it was late and I was finding it impossible to sleep. I was too hot, no matter how little clothing I slept in or how wide I kept all the windows.
‘What mischief have you been getting up to?’ I asked jealously.
She undressed and climbed into bed. I heard her breathing slow amazingly quickly. I had always been envious of people who could fall asleep with ease. I had to fight it, every damn night of my life.
‘Why are you really on this mission?’ I asked her.
‘I told you.’
‘And I obviously didn’t believe you.’
‘You would do well to keep your questions to yourself, Finn.’
‘I could say that I’ll try, but I’m afraid it would be a lie.’ I watched her still form. ‘Is it because of Thorne? You said you wanted to fight alongside the prince. And you were awfully protective of him for no apparent reason.’
‘He represents peace.’
‘So it’s not because you have any loyalty to him.’
‘I have loyalty to no one,’ she admitted. Then finally muttered, ‘I grew up in the streets. I have no idea who my parents were, nor if they were bonded. I’m doing this for the money.’
And it was bluntly honest enough that I didn’t ask any more questions.
We left early, eating a quick meal of fruit and bread before setting off towards the rock region. It took us two days to reach Ora, sleeping under the stars and playing guessing games to pass the time, and then another day to walk to the capital city Koll where we planned to stay the night at an inn. As we settled in our two rooms, I removed my shoes and drew on a light dress, then set out, pausing only to poke my head into the boys’ room.
‘I’m going to find Hess,’ I told them. ‘I don’t know when I’ll be back.’
‘Make sure it’s before midnight, Inney. I don’t want to have to traipse through the city to find you,’ Jonah sighed.
‘Then don’t.’
‘I’ll go with her,’ Thorne offered.
‘I don’t need a minder,’ I snapped.
‘No,’ Thorne agreed. ‘But would you grant me the pleasure of your company?’
I rolled my eyes. ‘Fine. Take your shoes off.’
‘Why?’
‘Nobody wears shoes in Koll. The rocks are warm and do wonders for the skin on your feet.’
I could see he found this puzzling and was uncomfortable in the extreme, but took his shoes off nevertheless. If I told him to walk naked because it would help him fit in, he would.
We walked in silence for a few blocks. I wasn’t entirely sure where I was going, but I figured she would be somewhere in the guts of the city. Everything was flat and wide, the buildings all the same sand colour.
‘We haven’t spoken about … the other day,’ he began awkwardly.
I considered letting him fumble his way through it, because his discomfort was amusing and quite adorable, but instead I shook my head. ‘Don’t ruin it.’
He looked a bit crestfallen, but thankfully changed the subject. ‘Who is Hess?’
‘A warder.’
‘Why do you wish to speak to a warder?’
‘She’s famous for her foresight.’
‘She reads the future?’
I nodded. ‘With more accuracy than any warder has been able to before her.’
‘And you wish to know your future?’
‘Well surmised, Thorne.’ I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. He was frowning. ‘You don’t agree?’
‘I think it a cruel thing to do to yourself.’
‘Will my life be so awful?’
‘It is cruel for anyone to know their future.’
‘If I know, one way or another I can stop worrying.’
‘What is it that you worry about, Finn?’
I didn’t mean to answer, but it escaped me before I could stop it. ‘Sam of Limontae.’
He was silent for a time, and then I felt his hand brush mine, seeking to take it. I pulled away, stopping to face him. ‘I need neither pity nor comfort,’ I warned fiercely. I deserved neither.
Thorne searched my face with that probing gaze of his, nodded once, and then we went back to walking.
After asking a few locals we found Hess’ home, adorned with a small sign that read her opening hours. We had arrived over an hour after she’d closed shop for the day. ‘Gods damn it,’ I muttered.
But the door swung open and a young woman motioned us inside, saying simply, ‘You’re late.’
Her fawn coloured hair was braided with pieces of leather and tawny feathers. Her eyes were white. And she looked no older than me. It was unsettling to see, knowing she was over a hundred years old.
‘I’m Finn, and this is Thorne,’ I told her.
‘I’m aware.’
‘You’re obviously Hess then?’
‘I’m obviously Hess.’
The ceiling was low, and Thorne had to duck his head to fit inside the house. Hess guided us to a living room, where we sank onto cushions in front of a raging fireplace despite the heat of the season. The room was sweltering, and the combination of this and the heady incense she had burning made me feel immediately nauseous. Perhaps it was this that caused my nerves to ratchet up, or perhaps it was simply the fact that I was here, finally, in a house I had wanted to visit for the last five years, and I might be facing an answer to the question I feared more than anything.
‘Should I wait outside?’ Thorne asked me.
I was about to say yes when Hess interrupted. ‘You do not wait outside.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I’ve seen it. You are present.’
‘But what if I get up and walk out right now?’
‘But you don’t.’
He didn’t like that one bit, I could see. He tried to settle himself, but was deeply uncomfortable with the idea of being powerless in the face of time or fate or destiny – or whatever it was. I didn’t particularly enjoy the sensation either, but I didn’t fight it like Thorne was trying to, for I had intimate experience with understanding the inevitable nature of a person’s place in the world. I felt something a little like a version of the future every time I touched someone’s skin. Not as definable as the future, more like an imprint of a soul and its fear, an imprint of a heart’s impact on those around it. I could not hope to ever explain this to anyone – I could barely define it in my own head.
‘You are here about the boy,’ Hess said, not at all like a question. ‘The boy you were infatuated with. You grew obsessed with him, dreamt of a life with him, imagined bonding with him.’
‘By all means, feel free to embarrass me,’ I muttered.
‘He would have fallen anyway,’ she said, and I froze.
‘What?’ My voice came out as barely a whisper.
‘Child, he would have fallen anyway.’ She leant forward, looking at me with those chillingly vacant eyes. ‘You saw that he was in danger, and you thought to help him. You entered his mind to give his hands strength, little knowing the impact that such a power would have on a young mind. He fell, and died. It weighs heavily on you. But it need not. He would have fallen anyway.’
A savage pain was clawing at my insides. I thought in that moment that I migh
t die of it. Because she was right, but she hadn’t mentioned the whole story. That was only a piece of it, and it made the rest worse.
‘I know the rest,’ she agreed, having read my mind. ‘And that is not your burden to bear either. She made her choice, as we must all be allowed to do.’
‘I’m not here about that,’ I rasped, unable to look at her, wishing Thorne was anywhere but in this boiling hot room. Sweat was trickling down my spine and I felt like either vomiting or screaming.
‘Ask your question then.’
I took a breath, felt it catch. ‘Will I kill again?’
‘Yes.’
And that was it. It hit me as a wave of heat and I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing I could faint and lose consciousness, disappear from this world and this body that was too small for me and had made of me a monster.
When I looked at Hess again she was focusing on something I couldn’t see. Her expression sharpened and she shook her head, murmuring, ‘No – not that one.’ She started to look frightened. ‘Not that one.’
Thorne looked as bewildered as I felt.
‘Hess?’
The woman’s eyes jerked back to me, blinked several times and then seemed to clear. ‘Forgive me. I see many times at once. Is there anything you wish to ask me, Prince Thorne?’
He stared at her, then shrugged. ‘Don’t you already know if I’m going to?’
‘Yes.’
‘So I don’t have a choice?’
‘Of course you do. Every move you make is of your own choosing. It is simply that I have already seen you choose what you choose.’
He considered this. ‘Are you ever wrong?’
‘I don’t know. I don’t assume so.’
Thorne shrugged. ‘I have nothing to ask.’
‘Would you like to know about the ice?’
‘No.’
‘Very well.’
‘Are we going to find the end to the bond?’ I blurted out.
‘Don’t ask that,’ Thorne warned quickly.
‘Why?’
‘What if she says no? Will you give up now, before even trying?’
I shook my head, not knowing the answer. ‘Don’t tell us,’ I agreed finally. ‘Better not to know.’
‘I will tell you two things, because I saw myself doing so,’ Hess said.
Thorne shook his head. ‘That doesn’t make sense. What if your vision is what brings the future to pass?’
‘So what if it is?’
He opened his mouth then helplessly closed it again.
‘What are the two things?’ I asked.
‘The writings you seek will be found at the warder prison. And at the end of this journey through ice and ghosts, one of you will die.’
All the air was gone from the room and my heart disappeared from my chest. What I thought in that moment shocked me to my core: Don’t let it be Thorne.
‘I know not which, nor how. But I know it is certain, and that it will only be one of you.’
‘Black sorcery,’ Thorne snarled suddenly, and I was stunned by the fury in his voice. ‘What right have you to play so cruelly?’
I turned to him quickly, reaching for his hand, but he was gone from the room with alarming speed.
Slowly I looked at the warder. I didn’t apologise for him, because a part of me hated her for what she’d said to us. I knew not how I would bear that knowledge, or what it would do to me.
‘It seems cruel,’ she said softly, and there was an abrupt sorrow in her. The very edges of her white eyes leaked to a deep jungle green, almost as though they had not been that way in many years and had forgotten how to shift. ‘I know it seems cruel. But the fact that I have told you this will impact on both your paths.’ And then, in a voice surprisingly hopeless, she murmured, ‘I had to speak because I saw that I did.’
It occurred to me how very bound she was to this gift of hers, a gift I now saw for the curse it was.
She reached to the left and whispered, ‘The stone will skip its path a thousand times,’ and I realised she was no longer speaking to me. I rose and left her, wanting to bid her farewell but finding my voice stuck at the strangeness of her particular kind of madness. I didn’t think she was even aware of me anymore.
Outside I found him staring up at the full moon, and under its gaze he seemed wolf-like to me, as though he might let out a mournful howl at any moment.
‘Why didn’t you tell me what had happened with Sam?’
‘Why would I have?’
‘You let me believe you murdered him for sport,’ he accused flatly.
‘And you believed it so easily.’
‘You wanted to make me hate you.’
I swallowed. ‘Did it work?’
He moved close to me, unbearably close. I could feel his breath against my lips, and I could feel my eyes shift. ‘No,’ he murmured.
It cut me, and I felt panic bloom from the wounds. Summoning all my cruelty and coating my heart in it, I simply replied, ‘Better it had.’ And walked away.
Thorne
She had secrets behind her eyes, and I was starting to guess what they must be. The reason she had to run and run and never stop.
But I knew something she did not. I was the heir to the throne of Pirenti, son of the slaughterman from the north, and one day I would be King. Even if I had to make myself the most powerful man in the world, I would do it, because I would not allow Finn of Kaya to die for me.
When I returned later to the inn, I found Jonah waiting for me in the dark. He motioned for me to be quiet so as not to wake Penn, and we went out onto the balcony.
‘Is Finn all right?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘Where is she?’
‘She left me in the city.’
‘Why didn’t you follow her?’
‘As she pointed out, she does not need a minder.’
Jonah shook his head, frustrated. ‘She’s not well, Thorne. She needs to be protected.’
‘No she doesn’t. She is more than capable of looking after herself, and old enough to know how.’
‘You don’t understand –’
‘I do, Jonah,’ I murmured. I reached out and placed a hand on his slender shoulder. ‘She will be well. She just wanted wine and laughter and people who don’t know her.’
‘What happened?’
I explained about the next clue being at the warder prison in the south.
‘That is dark news indeed,’ he sighed. ‘We can’t take Penn there.’
‘Why not?’
‘His parents are there.’
I frowned. ‘Guards?’
Jonah’s eyes shifted white, and it startled me in the dark. ‘Prisoners,’ he replied.
Chapter 10
Falco
I very nearly went with them. That was what I knew on the morning I woke to their departure. The silver-tongued girl had ensnared me, and the prince had seen me. He was the only one who ever had. Knowing that, knowing what I could be if I gave all of this up, my throne, my title, my power over Kaya … I very nearly went with them.
Instead, I decided to let Emperor Feckless take over. What was the difference, anymore? Perhaps he was not a deceit, but the truth of me after all.
Quillane
Falco was different over the next week. He drank more. Drank himself into comas. He took no women to his bed. He spoke very little, but was heard yelling at servants and smashing things in his tantrums. I found him one evening in a pool of vomit and nearly wept from the sight.
‘What is this?’ I whispered to his sleeping face. ‘What is it that plagues you, my love? And why will you not fight it?’
It was a week after that when I retired to Radha’s room to find her gone.
Falco
I woke with a splitting headache from a dream of the Sparrow. He always found me in my dreams. I could feel him circling, readying himself to come for me. In my dreams I dared him. Taunted him. For I wanted nothing more than for him to come after me and end this farce onc
e and for all.
And when he came, I wanted him to take me first. It was why I did all of this – to protect Quill from becoming a target.
Needing fresh air, I could think of only one spot in which I wouldn’t be interrupted by servants or courtiers. Making sure not to be seen, I climbed the stairs to the roof. On one side I could see my city sprawling below, full of the bustle of daily life. On the other I saw the world drop away into sea cliffs and an ocean that stretched out to a distant horizon.
The sun was hot, and I relished the feel of it on my skin. Without thinking, I drew my sword and began twirling it. My hands moved of their own accord, so used to the movements. Enjoying my body’s stretches, I pushed into a more complicated sparring pattern. Slash left, right, shift the foot positioning, spin and hack, block. I revelled in the power through my limbs, the push and strain of muscles, the instinctive way my body knew exactly what to do. My father had taught me every day since I’d been old enough to hold a blade. Nobody remembered that though. Parry, hard left jab, high riposte, sweep low and spin –
I wrenched myself to a stop.
There was a person watching me.
A young woman – without a blindfold. She had a pretty face, pointy nose, clever eyes. Belatedly she sank into a bow.
‘Who are you?’ I demanded, horrified.
‘Forgive me, Majesty. My name is Radha.’
‘Why are you up here?’
‘I came for the view.’
This was not good. ‘You are a servant?’
‘Yes, Majesty.’ She actually moved closer to me and brazenly looked at my face! ‘I can’t count the number of times I have been told of the Emperor and his disastrous abilities with a sword. He cuts himself, they say. Can’t even manage the weight of the weapon.’
The air left my chest. Was she threatening me?
‘Why do you hide it?’ she asked.
I was so dumbfounded I couldn’t reply.
‘You have so much talent, Majesty. It would comfort the people no end to know their Emperor was not quite as useless as he seems.’
We stared at each other. I had to remember to close my mouth. ‘Are you addled in the head?’ I managed. ‘What possesses you to speak so freely – and so insultingly – to your Emperor?’
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