For a moment, we just stared at each other. My cheeks started to burn. Then to my utter surprise, Kesar learned into me. With my mind still foggy from many changes, I did not think and welcome her lips with my own. I tilted her head to deepen the kiss.
Kesar gasped softly as I shoved my ravenous tongue inside her mouth.
I felt emboldened and let my hand find their ways over Kesar's feminine form, roaming around her soft skin like I was trying to mold her into me. I stroked her smooth fine legs and went further inside her long dress, which was pushed upward when she straddled me.
Kesar whimpered when she felt my hands squeezed her backside. I realized the maiden wore no underclothes. This only fueled my lust. I flipped us over. My mouth refused to disconnect from hers.
The maiden almost choked from the sensation coursing through her. I only broke off to let her breathe. I kissed down her throat with all the fury of my wanton needs.
"My lady..." Kesar moaned when I sucked hard on the crook of her neck and down to her breasts. Her cloth seemed to get in the way. Roughly yanking the wrapping off, I exposed her lovely mounds. My mouth welcomed them with my teeth and tongue. Kesar spread her legs and wrapped them around my waist.
The cold wetness of her femininity against my stomach made me shiver in excitement. But a thought struck me.
Deep down I knew that my mindless action was wrong. Yet my body was taking control as all the stress mounted up. The tension was begging me to be released. I fear it could only be done by this bodily pleasure. Kesar was just what I needed. I wanted her to quench the thirst of my desperation and even the wild longing for the princess.
Somewhere in the front of my mind, the voice screamed at me not to disrespect Kesar. The voice in my head wouldn't leave me alone. Soon I began to listen to the whisper of my conscience.
This was wrong to have my way with someone else just because I couldn't have it with the one I wanted.
With all my might, I pulled myself away from Kesar and got off her as fast as I could. The poor Kennari stared up at me in confusion.
"I'm sorry, Kesar....Please forgive me, I can't do this to you," I said and reclothed myself. Kesar sat up again and quickly covered her nakedness. She tried to hide her gaze from me. I already saw the shame and embarrassment on her face, but lying underneath it all was the hurt.
"Oh, no, no, please! Kesar, I'm so sorry!" I frantically apologized again. "It doesn't mean I did not want you. I...I just don't want to hurt you...please...please forgive me!"
"That is fine, my lady, I understand," Kesar murmured softly back. "I saw the way you looked at the princess, and I just knew it would never be me."
With that said, she rose from the bed and hurried out of the room.
CHAPTER 15
After Kesar left, I found myself unable to fall asleep. The house felt gravely empty all of a sudden. With the thing I did to her, I wasn't surprised if the poor Kennari had taken off into the night sky and wished to never see me again. My mind was now haunted by the shame that was eating away at my heart.
I never knew Kesar felt that way about me. I couldn't believe I almost took her innocence for my own selfish pleasure!
Nikita, what have you done to the poor maiden? Now you broke her heart with your own stupidity and ignorance!
"Kesar, I'm so sorry," I sighed. Unable to stand the weight of my guilt, I got changed into my regular clothes and snatched my satchel before leaving the chamber.
I didn't know where I was heading, but I didn't care. All I wanted was to get rid of my jumbled emotions—at least for a little while.
It was still early in the evening, but the world here seemed to be already fast asleep. I walked under the pale blue light casting over the treetops as the moon kindly accompanied me. Maybe I would find somewhere to sit down and draw. Drawing always kept my mind off things.
After a long walk, I found myself in one of the palace gardens. It was the farthest and largest of all. Numerous flower beds lined the pathway with well-trimmed bushes clustering about.
From a distance, a massive pale gray rock sat on the edge of a clear lotus pond. I could see a running stream flowed down a hillside. The trees surrounding the area swayed in the flower-scented breeze. I walked farther into the garden where soft green grass carpeted the sprawling meadows.
At the center of this beautiful heaven-like place, the moonlight reflected off the night dew on the ground like sparkling stars. I remembered Tepi once warned me about the Asoak Garden, which was forbidden to anyone. I wasn’t sure if this was the one. Even if it was off limits, this beautiful place looked too inviting and serene to ignore. No one was around, and I decided to just take a quick stroll inside.
Surely, it was like a small patch of paradise down there.
I walked towards the big rock and climbed atop it. After I sat down, my eyes admired the flowery meadows below me. Wild orchids hung from the fruit trees, blossoming in purple, yellow and blue. Other night blooms emitted their fragrance in the air.
The moon was getting brighter as the night grew deep. I could make out all those jasmine bushes. They were as numerous as the stars in the sky. In this garden of delight, I pulled out my drawing pad and started to sketch a picture of a winged maiden. Once I finished, I made light strokes with the coal tip of my pencil over those velvety feathers and long flowing tails.
I actually drew people better from memories, but drawing Kesar now must be my subconscious way of saying 'I'm sorry' to her. I remembered her beautiful golden wings extended in the air, and how she shied away when I asked her about them. I liked Kesar, just not that way. She deserved someone who would treat her better.
After a while, I was done with the work, but when I looked up from my pad, my breath hitched in my throat. My heart started to pound in my chest. It was as if we were destined to have our paths crossed. Amarisa emerged from behind a chrysanthemum bush.
I watched her angelic form strolling by the stream. Then she crossed a small stone bridge and passed through a grove of trees towards the clear pond. She walked towards where I was sitting, completely unaware of my presence. I sat astounded on top of the boulder.
Her delightful sight seemed to make the flowers dance and the water sing. The moonlight only intensified her glorious beauty. Frozen in surprise and joy, I forgot everything as I watched her brushing her delicate fingers over the blooming buds. She leaned over and sniffed a cluster of jasmine.
A besotted smile stitched across my face. She was utterly adorable. But when Amarisa lifted her head up again, her eyes caught sight of me sitting under the moonlight, eyeing her like a wild owl. The princess gasped, her gaze widened in shock. She looked like a frightened rabbit in the face of a fox. Then Amarisa turned around and started to run.
"Princess!" I cried after her and quickly shoved my drawing pad back into my satchel. Without hesitation, I jumped off the rock. My knees hit the soft ground, and I let out a sharp yelp. Amarisa did look back at me yet she did not stop. I stood up again and ran after her. The royal maiden looked terrified as if I was her personal demon. It hurt me, but I didn't stop my pursuit of the runaway princess.
"Your Highness, please wait!" I called out to her again as my feet sprinted through the garden. She had trouble running since her elegant nightgown was too long. In a matter of few seconds, I was able to grip her by the wrist and pulled her body around. She was hurled against me. Amarisa's dazzling eyes were alarmed.
"Please Princess Amarisa!" I said. "I just wanted to apologize about that day. I didn't mean to..."
She tried to push me away, but I kept her locked in a possessive embrace.
"Get your hands off me!" Amarisa yelled back. "I don't want you near me, you barbaric stranger!"
In all honesty, it wasn't my plan to appear as a pervert to her, but it so happened that we always found ourselves in some misleading situations. All she saw in me was a potential lunatic. I couldn't blame her for being scared, but calling me 'barbaric' totally set off my temper.
"Am
I that disgusting to you?" I growled.
My eyes pierced through hers. At that moment, she knew she had insulted me, but the princess wouldn’t acknowledge my hurt.
"If you don't stop harassing me, I shall report your hateful deeds to King Father," she threatened. "And before sunrise, I can guarantee you'll be in chains!"
"Oh is that so?" I said, cocking my head to the side. "You're truly going to do that to me? Well then, I guess we still have time before sunrise."
I was just scaring her, but once the words flew out of my mouth, she grew wild with panic and shoved me hard. I stumbled but my hand refused to let go of her.
"No!" Amarisa cried and pushed me again, but we both stumbled and fell onto the flowerbed.
"Oh dear!" I blurted as I was already right on top of her with my body wedged between her long shapely legs.
"Get off me!" she cried.
"Listen, princess! I did not want us like this!" I said before I could stop myself. "I just want us to be friends. I've been working so hard, hoping to impress you. But if you really wish to have me chained, then so be it!"
"You're mad!" the princess yelled at my face. "What have I done to wrong you so? Why do you always keep disturbing me?"
"Not true!" I protested back. "You are the one who tortures me. I have never known a moment of peace since the day I met you. Why do you make me so desperate and so miserable? Everything about you haunts me day and night!"
Amarisa's eyes filled with shock. She stopped moving and went silent. Her heart raced along with mine as we stared at each other. Now she was sure I was undoubtedly mad. I wouldn't blame her for thinking that since this place seemed to make me more emotional than usual.
"Amarisa, please, have mercy," I turned to plead in a softer voice. "Don't be like this with me. Please, just give me time to speak so we could be friends."
I could see a small hint of pity in her eyes. We stared at each other in silence. Then I gazed at her parted lips. The urge to kiss them was beyond control. I couldn’t help but lean forward for a kiss.
Amarisa turned her head away and let out a high-pitch scream.
"Malis!"
The sound of her melodious voice echoed through the garden. I gasped in terror. Then I heard a faraway roar and racing paws over the dry leaves. Before I knew it, the giant tiger leaped out of the shadow. A pair of glowing orange eyes stared intently at me as Malis jumped over the bush. Within a blink, she had me under her mighty jaw.
"ROAARRRRR!!!"
My hair was almost blown off my skull. I was ready to pass out from shock. The huge animal bared her dagger-sharp teeth.
"Oh dear!" I cried. My face must be as pale as the moon in the sky, and I didn't dare to move for fear that Malis would chew my head in one bite.
Amarisa rose again.
"Malis, come here!" she said and the weretiger got off me then bounced back to her mistress. I took a much-needed breath afterward. My face turned to the princess and her pet with an anxious look. Malis was now sitting on her hind legs. Her long sloppy tongue rolled out with drool. I grimaced at the beast. Why did Tepi have to give the princess such a horrid gift?
With an effort, I staggered to my feet again. Amarisa was still glaring hard at me. Her face was a deep shade of crimson but her eyes also flashed with a slight amusement. The fair princess could have ordered Malis to finish me for supper right then and there, but having witnessed how terrified I was of her pet had softened her anger a little.
"I demand that you change your attitude from this moment forth, or Malis shall have to enforce my decree."
Then she tossed her silky hair over her shoulder and hurried away. Malis trotted after her mistress.
CHAPTER 16
What happened in the Asoak Garden was the last thing I thought of before I fell asleep and the first thing that came to my mind when I awoke.
I bolted out of bed with a start when I realized the sun has risen past the horizon. The world spun in my vision as the blood pumped to my brain too fast. This morning, I had a class with Amarisa, and I couldn't be late!
Normally, Kesar would wake me up, but now I still hadn't seen her anywhere. Was she still upset? I sighed and tried to brush the sour feeling aside. The other maids prepared my morning bath, which I took in a hurry.
My breakfast was flat rice cakes that tasted sweet like they were dipped in honey. I attacked them as quickly as I could. When I went back to get dressed, I found Kesar there, holding a pile of clothes in her arms.
"Kesar?" I said. "You came back."
The maiden put the clothes down on the dressing table and looked at me with a sweet smile.
"You're getting ready for class, my lady?"
"Y-yes," I said with a stiff nod.
"Then we must hurry." She came forward and pulled me by the hand. "The day won't wait for us. The princess and her Queen Mother might even come early."
I wanted to apologize to Kesar about what happened last night, but she seemed to be preoccupied as she sat me down on a wooden chair in front of a large bronze mirror.
"First and foremost, you have to look presentable," she said. I stared at her through the hazy reflection. Kesar picked up a comb made of buffalo horn and carded it through my messy blonde lock. Then she proceeded to braid it neatly over my right shoulder.
I didn't know what to say. After she finished, she applied a small amount of natural oil on my hair. Its light fragrant scent cloaked me with pleasantness.
“That is a pleasant smell,” I said.
"It's the scent of Chankressna, the most prized fragrant plant of our land, my lady," she told me. "A woman is like a flower. She must smell as pleasant as she is pretty."
I felt my cheeks blush. Then I stepped into the finest silk clothes that Kesar brought to me. She helped button my white shirt and roll up my long sleeves to the elbows the way I liked it. I was comfortable in my fitting pair of pants and my freshly polished leather boots. Kesar straightened the collar of my shirt. I stared at her face in silence as she did so.
"Kesar..." I started, "about what happened last night..."
"It's alright, my lady," she said and brought her index finger to my lips. "It was not out of ill-intent. You're not at fault."
"But I’m still sorry," I said, putting my hands on her shoulders to make her look at me. "Kesar, I did hurt you, and I am so sorry."
She shook her head back with a sad smile. Her hands kept brushing gently on the front of my silk shirt. "I beg to differ, my lady. The blame is all mine. I shouldn't have high hope for a place in your heart."
I wanted to tell her there was no such thing as her fault, and I would always have a place for her in my heart, but Kesar quickly turned away again.
"Come now, my lady, we are running late for your morning class," she said.
"Are you coming along?" I asked.
"Of course, I am." Kesar smiled. "I'm one of the music teachers for the princess too."
We walked through a causeway that was built across a moat fed by a large water Baray. A cluster of wooden houses looked more like a small floating village. It rose above the clear water. Maids came to and fro, holding golden paraphernalia.
Once they spotted us, they brought out their glittering sunshades to escort me into the largest wooden building. It was erected high in the middle of the others.
Right after I crossed the threshold of the floating house, my eyes glanced around the place. There were many tall windows along the walls of a hall. A platform was raised like a stage at one end. Two rows of musical instruments hung on the walls with pictures of mythical scenes.
At one corner, I found the palace singers, the Mohoris and Mohoras. Next to them must be the Kennars, the musicians, and the Apsaras, the dancers. They sat among themselves staring back at me. I gave them an awkward smile and a small wave.
I turned to Kesar. "Please, don't tell me this is a drama class."
Then a voice which I recognized by heart spoke from behind a curtained doorway.
"If you wish n
ot to participate, you can leave immediately as you please."
I turned and saw that elegant figure emerging through the door. She brightened the whole world a dawn break. I still marveled at how she was like the spring and morning dew and rushing stream. A wide smile plastered on my face the moment our eyes met again.
"That would be against your mothers' wish, wouldn't it, Your Highness?" I said with a smile.
Amarisa glared back with those mesmerizing eyes.
"We only welcome those who set their hearts upon our art and dance, but for a strange foreigner like yourself, it's wise not to trust your commitment."
"Then I must humbly inform you that my heart’s already found where it belongs," I said, putting my hand over my chest before bowing at her.
Amarisa's face reddened. She turned herself away from me and walked over to a golden mat prepared for her. The two of us must have caused quite a scene as everyone in the room seemed so quiet. Even Kesar didn't linger by my side. She bowed away to sit among her fellows.
Amarisa was trying her best to ignore me. It only made me want her attention even more. I walked up and took a seat right next to hers. Our shoulders brushed against each other. I could hear a chorus of gasps in the hall, but Amarisa's was the loudest.
She stared at me in disbelief. I grinned back sweetly. The princess looked like she wanted to push me off my seat but at the same time, she didn't dare to show such aggression toward me in front of everyone.
Amarisa bit her bottom lip and scooted away as far as possible, but I followed her with a smile still lingered on my face. The lovely maiden turned to glare at me with new intensity, but before she could say anything, we heard a distant sound of a horn.
From the view of the window, Queen Jayara was being carried on a red and gold hammock, followed by a handful of palace guards and maids in tow.
Amarisa got up and went over to greet her mother by the door. The Queen got out of her hammock and was led over to the big house. Once she entered, her daughter and everyone else kneeled down to the floor. I bowed at her from where I sat.
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