by John Goode
She nodded. “But by the time I got here, it seems you took care of it yourself. Ingenious solution, by the way.”
“Who told you to come?” I asked, confused as hell.
Ignoring my question, she asked, “Did Robert tell you what was in the letter Riley left him?”
“I read it.” She paused when she heard that, but the only sign of surprise I could see was the slightest lifting of one eyebrow.
“Then you know the money was to be used on their children if they had any.”
I nodded.
“Yet Robert gave it to you.”
“To me and my boyfriend,” I said before I could stop myself. There was no boyfriend anymore.
“But mostly you, am I right?”
Another nod.
“I see. Then, in some way, Robert sees you as a son?”
That made me grin. “I wouldn’t say that in front of him; I think he thinks of himself as my not-so-older brother.”
She gave me a smile back, and I could tell it was her first real one of the day. “I promise not to tell if you don’t.”
“I suppose so,” I said, thinking about it. “I mean, I never thought about it that way because I never had a dad, but Robbie has been there to give me advice, get me out of jams, and slap me silly when I screw up.”
“That indeed sounds like a father,” she commented. “The club at school—that was your idea, correct?”
“The alliance? Yeah, I kinda screwed that up.”
“Last I heard they were going strong and more than a dozen students from both schools attend. They all say they owe it to you.”
“How would you know that?” I asked. This lady was spooky.
“I was the person who shut the first one down when Ms. Axeworthy started it. I was the person who also told Mr. Raymond to allow this one to start. So I have a vested interest in the matter.”
“You did that?” I asked, shocked.
“I did. Shutting down the first attempt was not my proudest moment, but I am trying to fix it.”
“How?” I asked, realizing it was really none of my business.
“In many ways that aren’t nearly enough.” she answered sadly.
I had no idea what to say to that.
“So you need to be back in California on Friday.” Again she made a statement instead of asking a question.
“You were listening?”
“When you get my age, you’ll find there is little else to do but listen at doors. I didn’t want to interrupt you, and I have to admit, I was intrigued by what kind of young man you are. My friend has very exacting taste; I wanted to see what she saw in you.”
“What did you see?”
“I see a young man who did not have a pleasant childhood, who spent most of it formulating a way out of his predicament, yet was ready to throw all of his plans for a bright future away to stand by the side of the person who made much of his early life unpleasant. It is not easy to exchange dreams for duty. Not many people today understand that.”
“She’s my mom,” I said, my eyes stinging with tears. “I can’t just leave her.”
“Yes, you could,” she corrected me. “And many young men in your situation would do just that. You don’t plan on putting your dreams ahead of your family, which tells me my friend was right.”
“Who is your friend?”
Again she ignored the question. “I’ll make you a deal. You go back to school, and I will not only take care of your mother’s hospital bill but make sure she has the care she needs to recover completely.”
I know my jaw hit the floor.
“Why would you do that?”
She gave me a wry grin. “It’s just money; why not?”
“Seriously, why would you do that for a stranger?”
She looked down, and I could tell she was composing herself as well. “Well, I suppose because if Robert gave you that money, it means he sees you as a son. If that is true, that makes me in a sense your grandmother and this is what grandmothers do. They spend exorbitant amounts of money on their grandsons to make them happy. And I have to agree, if Robert and Riley had a son, I would have very much liked him to be like you.”
It was like a huge weight was lifted off my chest and I could breathe again. The emotion swelled up inside of me so fast it was like being drunk for a second, and I lost all sense of self-control.
At least I think so, because it is the only reason to explain what I did next.
I got up and threw my arms around her. “Thank you,” I sobbed. “Thank you so much.”
She froze. I could tell she had no earthly idea how to react to me, but her arms slowly embraced me and I felt her pat my back. “Just do not give up on your life, Kyle,” she said, her voice cracking with emotion. “Do not let money or circumstance change who you are. Don’t ever let that happen.”
So I stood there crying into an old woman’s chest as I tried to realize things might not be that bad after all.
Brad
SO AFTER taking out the trash, I headed down to Tyler’s shop.
He and Matt were unpacking boxes and looked like they were seconds away from having a popcorn fight with the Styrofoam packing peanuts. As soon as I walked in, they sobered up and tried to look like adults. Not that they succeeded, but they tried.
“Hey, Brad,” Tyler said. His attempt at casual sort of flopped because he had two peanuts tangled in his hair. Matt snickered, although he kept his mouth covered until he could control himself.
“You guys need a minute?” I asked, pointing back at the door. “I can walk around the block or something.”
“Shut up and get in here,” Tyler ordered, laughing himself.
“In my defense,” Matt said, “he started it.”
“You want a Coke?” Tyler asked, brushing the peanuts out of his hair. Both of us nodded. “Two Cokes coming up.”
“How you doing?” Matt asked.
I shrugged. “Kyle came by.”
“How did that go?”
“Bad,” I admitted, grabbing a stool and sitting down.
Tyler reemerged from the back room with three Cokes in hand and asked, “What did he say?”
“He wanted to get back together and….” I paused, not ready to show how much this upset me. “… Well, I told him that wasn’t happening, and he just looked like I had kicked him in the balls.”
“You did?” Matt said, taking a sip from the bottle. When both Tyler and I looked at him, he said, “What? Getting dumped feels like shit.”
“What are you going to do?” Tyler asked, looking back to me.
“I dunno. That’s why I came by.”
Tyler nodded and took a stool himself. “Okay, shoot.”
“Any chance you’re hiring?”
“Yep,” he answered, sounding way too chipper.
“Any chance you’d hire me?”
“Nope,” he answered, just as chipper.
“What? Why?”
“Because if I give you a job, then you’d resign yourself to living here and you wouldn’t get back with Kyle.”
I needed a second to process that. “Wait, you’re not going to give me a job because you think Kyle and I should get back together?”
He nodded.
“I don’t want to get back together with him.”
“Yeah, you do,” Tyler corrected. He definitely sounded like an adult.
“No, I don’t,” I assured him.
“Yes, you do,” Matt chimed in.
“I think I know what I want,” I snapped… well, I whined.
“Did you know what you wanted at eighteen?” Tyler asked Matt.
“Besides sex? Nope.”
Tyler looked back at me. “So yeah, you don’t know what you want.”
I stood up. “I don’t want to be with Kyle.”
“Do you love him?” Tyler asked.
“That’s not the point.”
“Yeah, it is,” he argued and gulped another swig of Coke. “See? You don’t know what you want.�
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I slammed my Coke down on the counter. “I am not a little kid! I know what I want do to with my life.”
“And that’s working at a sporting-goods store?” Tyler asked.
“It’s a start,” I challenged him.
“Nope, it’s you making a mistake. Sorry, no job here.”
“You’re serious?” I asked, not believing what was happening.
“As a heart attack,” he answered.
“I don’t want to be with Kyle!” I raged.
“Yeah, you do,” they both said simultaneously. They sounded like grown-ups. In stereo.
I turned around and stomped out.
I hated it when people said they knew what I wanted more than I did myself. I mean, I’m the one inside my brain; I should know better, right? I walked across the street to Nancy’s. Maybe something to eat would settle me down. Gayle waved at me as I sat down and glanced at the menu.
“Kyle joining you?” she asked, walking up.
“We broke up,” I said, wondering how she didn’t know that already.
She grabbed the menu out of my hand. “Then go make up with him.”
“He broke up with me in California, and I don’t want to get back together with him.” Was this shit for real?
“Yes, you do,” she said, still holding the menu hostage.
“Please don’t do this,” I not quite whined. “Tyler and Matt just started in on me.”
“Do you love him?” she asked me.
“Why do people keep asking me that? Love is not the problem!” I almost screamed.
“Nope, it’s the solution. Go work it out,” she said, walking away.
“I can’t order?” I called after her.
“Not while you’re single.”
Growling, I got up and stomped out.
This was getting ridiculous.
Kyle
AFTER MRS. Mathison left, I drove over to the hotel where Robbie and Sebastian were staying.
I knocked twice before Sebastian, shirtless, opened the door. Jesus Christ, he was built.
“Oh! Hey, Kyle,” he said, clearly out of breath. I didn’t want to know from what. “He’s in the shower.”
“I came to talk to you, actually.”
“Okay.” He backed away from the door and added, “Come on in.”
The room looked a little trashed, and I wondered what had happened in here. When I saw that most of the covers on the bed were torn off, I got it. “If this is a bad time, I can come back,” I said, suddenly feeling way out of place.
“If you’d shown up ten minutes ago it would have been a bad time. Now is okay,” he said, grabbing a shirt and pulling it on. “So speak.”
I sat down on one of the chairs. “What did you mean ‘what would Brad do?’”
“Ah, so we’re having this conversation,” he said to himself, nodding. Then he looked straight at me. “What do you think I meant?”
“What conversation? You were expecting me?”
“Kinda, but answer the question. What do you think I meant?”
How had this guy who’d never met me known I was coming back?
“I dunno, I mean… what would he do if I wouldn’t take him back?” He nodded. “Um, keep trying?”
He gave me a small smile. “Is that your final answer? Have you ever broken up with him before?” I nodded. “And what did he do?”
“Kept calling me and begging me to take him back.”
“Right, so is that what you’re doing?”
I paused.
“Robbie filled me in on what went down when he lived here, and every story seemed to be this incredible thing that Brad did for you. I really never heard something you did for him. Did Robbie forget to tell me a story? Did he leave out an event?”
I felt myself shrinking into the chair.
“See, guys like Brad, they’re fiercely loyal and will go to the ends of the Earth for the people they love. But that loyalty only lasts so long if it isn’t reciprocated. He gave it his all trying to be with you, and you still dumped him. He’s hurt and he doesn’t want to be made a fool of again.”
“I didn’t call him a fool!” I protested.
“No, but you rejected him. You didn’t trust him, right?” I nodded. “Well, that’s the same thing. You want to get him back? Ask yourself, what would Brad do?”
“Anything.”
“There you go.”
He was right. Brad had always been the one doing all the romantic things, while I was the one he chased. And that was just wrong. He’d never complained, but that was Brad; he never would. God, I’d fucked this up pretty bad.
“What if he doesn’t love me anymore?” I asked, suddenly scared.
“He loves you, trust me. He just doesn’t like you that much right now.”
“I don’t like me that much either,” I mumbled.
“Don’t blame you,” he said, getting up. “Look, Kyle, you’re both young and things like this seem insurmountable, but trust me, they aren’t. If you guys are really meant to be together, you will be. It’s just your turn to convince him.”
“I will,” I said, standing up myself.
“Are you getting in here?” Robbie yelled from the bathroom.
“Now it’s a bad time,” Sebastian clarified wryly.
“Thanks for the advice.”
“My pleasure,” he said walking me to the door. “Just remember, you hurt his ego and his pride, so make sure whatever you do, you’re willing to sacrifice your own.”
I nodded. “Any suggestions?”
He glanced back to the bathroom and then to me. “I’m not going to lie, my mind is somewhere else. You’re a smart guy. You’ll get it.”
And he closed the door.
Ego and pride? I began to think on it as I walked back to the car.
Brad
I HADN’T walked First Street in years.
Before I got my car, my two feet were my only form of transportation. I have no idea how I got around then. Now I had no idea where I was going; I was pissed, hungry, and just walking. So I was kind of shocked when a car honked at me and pulled over.
It was weird how my mind had changed. Before I would have just assumed it was someone I knew and jogged over to the car; now I wondered if I was being cruised. Did they cruise in Foster? I can’t imagine things had changed that much. My fears were dismissed when I saw Josh Walker get out of the car.
“What the fuck, man?” he called out with a huge smile on his face. “Since when does Prince Graymark walk anywhere?”
I hadn’t realized how much I had missed Josh, and I walked over and gave him a huge hug. “Dude, it’s a story, trust me.”
He pulled away. “Yeah, Jennifer told me everything. You should get back together with him.”
God fucking dammit!
“Can I have a conversation with someone today without them telling me how to live my life? Just one?” I almost screamed.
“Okay then,” he said, shaking his head. “This is a no-Kyle zone,” he decided, gesturing around us. “Promise.”
“Thank you!” I sighed, relived. Then I glanced over at his car, did a double take, and felt my heart flip-flop. “Is that yours?”
An electric blue Dodge Challenger with a spoiler and rims…. I mean, this car was fucking sex… and it lounged right at the curb. Briefly I wondered if being charged with carjacking would be worth it.
“Yeah, the alumni get us cars to use during the school year. They say it’s an incentive for us to play harder.” Josh leaned against the car and grinned. “You wanna drive it?”
“Me?” I squeaked, sounding like a twelve-year-old. Shocked. “You’d let me?”
“Dude, you got me into A&M; as far as I’m concerned this is half your car too.” He tossed me the keys. “Come on, let’s get the fuck out of town.”
I hadn’t heard a better suggestion in my life.
It purred like a saber-toothed tiger, and I felt instant jealousy because Josh got to drive it all the time. I mean,
I loved my car, but this, this was just… let’s say I wanted to have relations with this car in a big, bad way. Two seconds later I slid behind the wheel, waited for Josh to climb in, and started the engine. I pointed us toward the lake and let the road disappear beneath us. I had a strange sense of déjà vu as we came up on Old Man Wilson’s bait-and-tackle shop. It was the only store out there, and most of us had bought booze there before heading up. As far as Old Man Wilson was concerned, money was money.
“I haven’t been here in….” I began to say and then stopped. I hadn’t been here since I brought Kyle out here to cut school. “In a long time,” I finished, pulling into the parking lot.
“You wanna grab some brews and hit the lake?” he asked, purposely ignoring that I was suddenly as depressed as shit.
“College has made you wise, son,” I said, nodding.
He laughed and got out with me hot on his heels.
“So how is it?” I asked as we grabbed supplies.
“It’s okay,” he said nonchalantly.
“Dude, I am not going to get mad because I turned it down.”
He spun around. “Dude, it’s fucking epic!!” he roared with a huge smile.
“I figured,” I said, smiling back. I wasn’t upset about my choice. A&M had wanted me to hide who I was, and I wasn’t going to do that again, ever. “Parties?”
“Insane! It’s basketball season, so those guys throw a fucking party every week after the game.”
“I went to one of those,” I exclaimed, putting my stuff on the counter. “That was when one of the guys hit on me.”
Josh pulled out a wad of bills. “Danny?”
I did a double take. “You know him?”
He nodded as he got his change. “He’s best friends with my cousin. They’re both on the team.”
“Wait, who’s your cousin?” I asked, confused.
“Nathan Walker?” He saw I had no idea. “He’s a good guy, but yeah, Danny is a trip.”
“He ever get together with his guy?” I asked when we got into the car.
“No idea, man. I go to the parties, but he and Nate are the close ones. I mean, I know he’s at least bi, ’cause he was dating a girl, but Nate says he’s gay.”
“He told me he was bi too,” I said, driving out to the lake.
