by Claire Kent
“I was hoping she might somehow recognize that I’m her father and...” Seth paused, as if rethinking his remark.
Erin looked up at him again, her hand falling to rest unconsciously on his belly. “She’s going to love you, Seth. She will. But, believe me, that won’t necessarily stop her from throwing a fit if she feels like it.”
Settling against him again, Erin relaxed and watched her sleeping daughter fondly. “Although, I do believe she’s finally worn herself out at last. So have I.”
She wasn’t looking at his face, but she was sure that Seth was smiling. “So have I.”
Erin smiled too. Felt warm and safe and content. Was able to really relax for the first time all day. Watched Mackenzie’s steady breathing, her little shoulders go up and down. Up and down. Up and down.
Erin must have relaxed too much. Because the next thing she was aware of was opening her eyes.
She had fallen asleep. Practically on top of Seth. Her cheek was pressed up against the side of his chest, and—to her mortification—she realized she was drooling just a little. On his very expensive shirt.
Mackenzie was still sleeping against Seth’s chest, his arm holding the infant securely.
“Oh, God,” Erin moaned, feeling stiff and embarrassed and still kind of groggy. Wiping her mouth discreetly, she forced her head up so she could see Seth’s face. “Oh, God, I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you wake me up?”
He shrugged slightly. His motion was hampered by the baby he was holding with one arm and by Erin’s body, which pressed into his side, trapping his other arm. “You were tired.”
“But...” she began, looking over at the clock on the cable box. She’d been asleep for more than a half-hour. “God, you probably wanted to go home. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened.”
“Erin, it’s fine. If I’d wanted to leave, I would have woken you up.”
With a soft groan, Erin relaxed against him. She couldn’t find the energy to pull away quite yet. “Poor Seth,” she mumbled, not having collected her wits. “Getting slept on by two people at once. How does it feel to be a mattress?”
She released the tension in her muscles again, deciding there was no reason to be embarrassed, deciding she might as well enjoy this peaceful respite from the stress of the day.
“Believe me—I’ve suffered through far worse scenarios.” Seth’s voice was light, and dry, and ironic. But the fingers of the arm that held Mackenzie were shifting slightly, as if he were caressing the baby.
Then she started feeling a little uncomfortable again, mostly because she thought Seth was looking at her.
The truth was—he wasn’t just a warm, cozy mattress. He was a man. A man who five months ago had made it clear he was in love with her. A man with whom she’d had sex on more than one occasion. A man they called the Bulldozer because he was so relentless in getting what he wanted.
She would be indulging in the depths of stupidity if she failed to acknowledge him as a whole man. This soft, tender side of him was only part of the whole.
Self-consciously, she straightened up, although she didn’t pull away—not wanting to insult or hurt him.
Seth must have recognized the shift of mood. He didn’t pull away either, but the weight of his arm around her became lighter. “How was your date?”
Erin slanted another look up at him, trying to assess his expression. He wasn’t looking bristly or possessive, so she replied casually, “It was fine.”
“Why did you come back early?”
“I was tired. And the date wasn’t that great.”
A smile played on the corners of Seth’s mouth. “I told you it would be a flop.”
“He was a nice guy. He was cute and sweet and smart.”
At this, Seth frowned. “Was he?” His tone had grown ice cold, and Mackenzie squirmed in her sleep, as if she recognized the chill in his voice. Seth’s tone softened as he continued, “Then I’m surprised you’re not still out with him.”
Erin made a noncommittal mumble. It was just too hard to explain it to Seth. Whatever she said, there was the risk of his taking it the wrong way.
“Erin?” Seth persisted, shifting beside her. “If your date was acceptable, then why wasn’t the evening a success?”
Erin’s defenses were low—too low, more than likely. But she decided she might as well tell him the truth.
She focused her eyes on Mackenzie although she could feel Seth’s steady gaze on her face. “Well, honestly, I guess I’d just rather be here.”
Sixteen
“Damn,” Erin muttered—under her breath, so Mackenzie wouldn’t hear from across the room. “It’s too tight.” She couldn’t get the zipper on the skirt all the way up. “Why the heck do I only own pencil skirts? I was really hoping this one would fit.”
Liz scrutinized her from where she was sprawled on the bed with Mackenzie in her lap. “It looks all right to me.”
Erin turned around, so Liz could see her from the back. An inch of the zipper was hanging open and the fabric of the skirt was skintight over the curves of her ass.
“Well, maybe it’s a little too tight for mixed company.”
Erin groaned, undid the zipper, and shimmied out of the skirt. “Why are all of my nice clothes too tight?” When she saw Liz open her mouth to respond, she hurried on, “Don’t answer that.”
She turned back to frown into her closet, wearing her prettiest black bra and panty set and hoping the right outfit would miraculously appear. “I should have just bought something new, but that would feel like a defeat. I don’t know why I can’t shed these last pounds.”
“You look great. No one cares about a few extra pounds. You had a baby less than six months ago. It happens. Seth is going to be so ecstatic that you’re actually going on a date with him that he won’t even notice.”
Erin yanked a black skirt off a hanger in the back of her closet. “I’ve told you a dozen times this isn’t a date.”
“Oh. I see. My mistake.”
“He’s taking me out to dinner to celebrate my birthday. That’s all.”
“Of course. Makes perfect sense. Even if your birthday was two weeks ago.”
Erin pulled on the next skirt—one in the series of seven or eight she’d tried on so far. “He was out of town on my birthday, which you know perfectly well. Today happened to be the evening that worked out best for us. We’re friends. Why shouldn’t we go out to dinner?”
“That’s right. And why shouldn’t you spend more than a half-hour picking out something to wear for dinner with a friend?”
Erin had to admit that Liz had a point. She was stressing over her outfit more than usual. She wasn’t used to going out with Seth, though—even as just a friend. Until recently, he’d gone out with the most beautiful women in the city. Plus, a movie actress.
How was she supposed to compete with that?
“How is this skirt?” Erin asked in resignation, looking down at herself. The skirt was made of a soft fabric that draped over her shape without clinging unattractively, and it flattered her hips before it flared out in a subtly ruffled hem just above her knees.
“That’s the one. It’s gorgeous. Very sexy.” When Erin moaned into her hands, Liz’s brows drew together. “What’s the matter? You look fabulous in it.”
Erin answered in an anguished wail. “It’s a maternity skirt.” She pulled at the elastic waistband to show how much it would stretch. “Is it obvious?”
Liz was laughing so hard she was having trouble holding Mackenzie steady. The baby found the whole situation hysterical herself and giggled in response.
Erin just watched them with a long-suffering frown until Liz finally restrained her hilarity.
“It looks like a normal skirt,” Liz assured her. “Just don’t pull at it like that. And make sure your top is long enough to cover the waistband.”
Feeling a little better, Erin peered at herself in the mirror. She was pretty sure Liz was right. The skirt was well made, and she didn’t think anyone would be abl
e to tell it was maternity unless she actually stretched out the fabric to show them.
Erin already knew what top she was going to wear. She’d bought it a couple of weeks ago—a splurge she’d only allowed herself because it was her birthday. So Erin found the blue cashmere sweater with a scooped neck and fitted shape. It had been ridiculously expensive, but she hadn’t been able to resist after she’d tried it on.
When she pulled the sweater over her head, she stared at herself in the mirror. Thought she looked damned good, even wearing a maternity skirt.
“Gorgeous,” Liz told her. “Seth is going to—”
“Liz.”
“Well, he is.”
“We’re going to dinner as friends.” Erin checked her hair and makeup. “Why won’t anyone believe that?”
“Because it’s ridiculous. I understand that you’re not in love with him, but—I’m sorry—y’all are way more than just friends.”
“We’ve gotten closer, yes. But that’s mostly because of the pumpkin. It’s not like we’re soul mates or spill our guts or anything. We get along well. We have a child together. And maybe we have a little chemistry.”
“And he’s in love with you.”
Making a face, Erin hunted through her closet for a pair of shoes. “Well, he was. He hasn’t said a word about that recently, so for all I know he’s changed his mind.”
When Erin turned back toward the bed, she saw Liz shooting her an exasperated look.
“I’m serious,” Erin continued. “He and I don’t have sweet, intimate chats. We talk about Mackenzie. We talk about things that happen. We talk about work. The only time he’s ever really opened up to me was at the hospital.”
“Well, do you blame him for not trying again?”
“Of course not. I’m not complaining. I’m just telling you how it is. If he still has feelings for me, he’s keeping them pretty well hidden. Which I, for one, really appreciate. We have enough to deal with trying to be parents, without worrying about romance on top of everything else.”
“You say romance like it’s a bad word.”
“That’s because most of the time it is.” Erin slipped on a pair of black heels and tried to decide whether the added height to her legs was worth the discomfort. “Think about who you’re talking to. I’m the poster-child for being stupid about romance with Marcus. Having a baby hasn’t changed everything. I’m a realist now, remember?”
Liz was giving her a very strange look, but all she said was, “Yeah. I remember.”
Erin kicked off the pumps and found another pair of black shoes with chunkier heels. “Now,” she explained seriously. “When Seth comes, you have to go open the door. And, if he’s wearing anything too dressy or too casual for this outfit, then you have to run in here and tell me, so I can change clothes real quick.”
Bursting into laughter again, Liz replied, “Got it. But you look great. Just right for this kind of date.”
“Thanks for babysitting tonight.”
“I’m happy to. Between Seth and Stella, I almost never get the chance. Mac and I are going to have a great time, and I brought my overnight stuff with me tonight, just in case.”
Erin almost choked at the abrupt turn of conversation, as she realized what Liz was implying. “We’re not about to...I mean, Seth isn't...I’m not going to...”
“Well, you never know. And you are wearing your best undies. Did you shave?”
Erin had shaved, but that was absolutely irrelevant.
“So just in case, I brought my overnight stuff. No need to even explain. If you don’t get home until tomorrow morning, I’ll be the soul of discretion.”
To that, Erin didn’t respond.
***
Erin had requested that she and Seth go somewhere quiet and out of the way for dinner, so he took her to the exclusive dining room at an expensive, historic inn just outside of the city. They had plenty of privacy, and the service and food were excellent.
Seth had chosen well.
Instead of the reserved, considerate man he usually was around Mackenzie, Seth had turned on his charming, cosmopolitan self. He offered Erin the best of everything all evening—and that included himself as a suave and charismatic date. They drank expensive wine, ate delectable food, dined amid lovely antiques and artwork.
And Erin had a really good time.
Seth looked incredibly attractive in all black, and there was nothing cool or distant about him as they chatted and laughed through the evening. He wasn’t openly flirtatious and didn’t act in any way that was blatantly romantic.
But, by the time dinner was over, Erin felt like her head was spinning just the same.
It had been so long since she’d been out like this. So long since she’d been on any date other than the failed double date with Liz. And—even though her relationship with Seth was somewhat precarious—it felt really good to once more act like an attractive, single woman, who did things like go out on Saturday nights.
Erin thought about Mackenzie on and off during the evening, but it never distracted her from having a good time.
She did, however, feel the need to call Liz to check in when she and Seth finally got up after dinner. They wandered into the lobby of the inn, where Seth saw someone he knew. So Erin murmured that she’d quickly call Liz, while he went to speak to his acquaintance.
The dining room had been a little stuffy, and the lobby was even more so, so Erin made her way through the French doors off the lobby and out onto an empty balcony. The balcony was large and high off the ground. It boasted an ornate railing, and huge potted plants—so tall they towered over Erin’s head—were grouped in the corners of the balcony near the building.
It was very late autumn, but the night was unseasonably mild, so Erin didn’t even need a jacket. She walked over to the railing and leaned against it. Looked down into the dark gardens and lawns surrounding the inn. Took a deep, cleansing breath.
Then she called Liz to see how Mackenzie was.
Evidently, Mackenzie had been an angel all night and was now sound asleep. Since Liz didn’t sound like she was about to scream, Erin had to assume everything at home was fine.
“You’re not on your way back yet, are you?” Liz asked. “It’s only ten o’clock.”
“I don't know. We’re kind of in the middle of nowhere. I’m not sure what else there is to do.”
Liz made a strangled sound that Erin chose not to interpret.
“Anyway,” Erin continued resolutely. “I was just calling to check on things.”
“Things are great. I’m watching a marathon of decorating shows. I now have four possible themes to decorate my bedroom with.”
“Sounds delightful.”
“You’re having a good time, aren’t you?”
“Yeah,” Erin admitted. “I’m having a really good time.”
As she disconnected the call, she heard a warm voice from behind her. “Well, that’s good to know.”
Erin twitched in surprise and looked over her shoulder to see Seth approaching to stand behind her. “You’re very sneaky. I didn’t hear you come out.”
He smiled, and something in his expression looked almost predatory. “I prefer the word stealthy to sneaky.”
She wanted to grin, but she found herself shivering instead—an instinctive, involuntary reaction to his look and the seductive quality of his voice.
Something sparked alive inside her as she felt his strong, compelling presence behind her, as his body brushed lightly against her back.
Feeling nervous and unsettled, Erin looked forward again, stared at the dark sky, and prayed she wouldn’t do or say anything stupid.
“Erin,” Seth murmured. He must have bent his neck because his voice was right at her ear.
His breath wafted over her sensitive skin and made her shudder again, from her spine to her toes, and also to a place between her legs that was growing hotter by the second. She clutched the railing with both hands and refused to look back at him. “What?”
<
br /> He gently nuzzled her hair and slipped one arm around her waist. “Erin,” he breathed again. This time she could actually feel his lips moving against her ear.
She sucked in an urgent breath and stiffened with confusion and anxiety. It had been months since their relationship had included this kind of physicality. She’d started feeling secure and content with the part of Seth that was Mackenzie’s father.
She’d forced this side of Seth to the back of her mind, and she wasn’t sure she was ready for its sudden appearance.
“What?” she said again, her voice even shriller than before. Her cheeks burned and her knees shook and something almost forgotten pulsed between her legs.
“Are you actually going to pretend you’re not feeling anything?” His hand lightly rubbed her belly, although she wasn’t pregnant anymore.
Erin tried to pull herself together. She was a grown woman. She knew how to handle situations like this. “Of course I feel something. We’ve always been attracted to each other, and you’re really turning on the charm tonight.”
“Is it working?” He gently moved aside her hair so his lips could trace down the back of her neck.
She was shivering again, the tremors starting low in her spine. Her knuckles whitened as they gripped at the railing. “A little bit. Who can resist Seth Thomas when he turns on the sex-god act?”
He let out a breath. She could feel it blow against her warm skin. “Can you?”
“Am I attracted to you? Of course. But I don’t think we should—”
Before she could finish, Seth turned her around so she faced him. He kept his arms draped around her, though, so she was trapped in his embrace. “Erin,” he said, his voice now blunt and matter-of-fact—no longer sexy or alluring. “How long are you going to keep denying that your feelings for me are changing?”
Her mouth dropped open. She was still physically responding to him, but now her heart also lurched in her chest. “Seth, you have to understand. Yes, we’ve gotten closer. Yes, we’re building up the trust between us again. But that doesn’t mean—”
“I do understand.”
Her face twisted, and something heavy clenched in her gut. “I don’t know that you really do. If it was just sex, that would be different. But it can’t just be that anymore. I care about you a lot, Seth. And, of course, I’m attracted to you. If we were just dating, then I’d probably think things were going well.” She put a hand on his chest, to emphasize her urgency. “But we’re not just dating. We’re...far beyond that now. And, unless things have changed, you can’t be casual about this. You can charm the pants off me if you want, but it still won’t make me lo—”
