by Lolita Lane
“No you haven’t. Your cup is still full,” she said with a laugh. “Let’s go.”
I followed Christie as she led the way to the next room. We snaked our way through the crowd to an empty spot close to the edge of the dance floor. I wasn’t the most graceful dancer, but I had enough rhythm to not make a fool of myself. People were starting to pay attention to us and I realized that was exactly what she wanted.
Christie waved at a tall guy with wavy brown hair I recognized from one of my classes. I grabbed her arm, afraid she was going to join him.
“Don’t you dare leave me,” I said.
“You’ll be fine. Maybe you’ll meet someone new like that guy in the doorway. He’s watching you.” She jerked her head towards his direction as she switched sides with me so I could see who she was talking about.
A really cute guy with short spiked hair standing in the doorway looking in our direction. I smiled shyly and when he smiled back I spun around to avoid looking at him. I didn’t know what to do.
Was he going to come over and dance? Should I go over and ask him? I had never been in that situation before, but as my thoughts swam around my head, I realized someone else was looking at me. Professor Matthews.
Chapter Four
I couldn’t read Professor Matthews’ expression, but he was definitely watching me dance. I tried to not stare at him too much, but my eyes kept going back to him. The last thing I wanted was for him to realize how much I liked him or the attention I was getting from him. I didn’t want it to stop.
As the song ended, I caught him take a deep breath and turn away from me. I felt ridiculous thinking he had been watching me. He was probably making sure I wasn’t having some kind of seizure on the dance floor.
Christie ran off to talk with the tall guy so I decided to retire my ridiculous moves and stepped off the dance floor.
Knowing Professor Matthews, he was probably pissed at me for not working on my thesis. Just that coupled with my lousy dancing was probably enough for him to not give me the grade I needed.
I gritted my teeth in frustration. Part of me felt like just asking him what his problem was. Why was he always so hard on me? I had to remember that he was just my professor and it shouldn’t matter what he thought about me. We didn’t have to be friends. I didn’t need to know why he didn’t like me.
“Hey there, beautiful,” a male voice spoke from behind me.
I turned around and found myself face-to-face with the cute guy who smiled at me earlier. He had playful green eyes and a squared jaw. The lights from the dance floor made his blond buzz cut look green, then red. He was better looking than I realized when I first saw him.
“Hi,” I said.
I smiled up at him, but my shyness overtook me and I quickly looked away.
“I thought you might need a drink,” he said as he handed me a short, wide glass with a clear liquid and ice inside of it.
I took the glass from him and held it between my hands.
“Thanks,” I said.
I cautiously raised the glass and took a sniff, then quickly moved it away as I tried to clear my nose from the strange scent.
What is in there? I thought.
“I’m Tom. What’s your name?”
“Sarah,” I said.
“You moved really gracefully out there. Are you a dance student?”
“Um, thanks. A dance student? Really? No, I’m not,” I said laughing nervously. “You’re kidding, right?”
“Not at all,” he said. He tilted his head to the side and pushed my hair behind my ear. “I guess you were just eager to get out there. Are you always like that?”
“Maybe,” I said with a nervous laugh as I took a cautious step away from him. “Trying everything is supposed to be the college experience, right?”
“Yeah, that’s what they say. It’s a time for experiencing new things.” He rubbed his chin as he eyed the untouched drink in my hand. “You should try that. I think you’ll like it.”
I raised the glass and took a deeper sniff. The smell made my nose scrunch. What is this? I thought. It smells like rubbing alcohol.
“I don’t think so. It smells a bit strong,” I said.
“Nah, it barely smells like anything. Come on, just a little sip. What’s one sip going to do?”
I looked at the clear liquid in the glass and moved my hand to swirl the ice cubes around. I was curious what something that smelled so strong would taste like. I looked up at Tom as he smiled eagerly.
“You’re right,” I said. “What’s one sip?”
As I brought the glass up to my lips, the strong stench of alcohol overwhelmed me. No. There was no way I was tasting this.
Before I could move the cup away from my face, it was smacked out of my hand. The drink splashed against my clothes as the glass fell and shattered as it struck the floor.
“What the hell?” I said as I turned to see what creep would have done that to me.
Professor Matthews stood beside me with a stern expression on his face. I had never seen him look so mad before. Small veins pulsed at his temples as his jaw clenched and unclenched. I looked from him, then over to Tom who turned and vanished into the crowd.
Asshole, I thought. I wasn’t sure which man I was referring to, but at that moment they both fit the description.
“What is wrong with you?” Professor Matthews said. “I know you’re not stupid, but why else would you accept a drink from some strange guy?”
“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you?” I said, my anger getting the better of me. “For all you know Tom and I are old friends. And what do you care anyway? What are you, a chaperone?” I snapped, unable to think of something harsher to say. “This is a college party. No one needs a babysitter here.”
“He could have spiked that drink,” he said, his voice harsh. “Do you even know what that was? Everclear could destroy a delicate thing like you.”
“A delicate thing? I’ll have you know I am not some delicate fucking flower, Professor. Also, it’s none of your business what I do on my own time.”
My fists were clenched as he moved closer to me, making me feel small. He had never stood so close to me before and while I always knew he was tall, but I didn’t realize how he towered over me until that moment.
“Go home, Sarah. This isn’t where you belong,” he said through gritted teeth. “Do it before you get yourself in trouble.”
I was livid. My temper was beyond boiling. I was so mad I wanted to punch my professor, but I knew better than that. He was still what stood in front of me and the honors title that I had been working so hard on for these last few years. No matter how much he meddled or treated me like a child, I needed to watch what I said to him.
“I’ve done the coursework, I’ll write the thesis, but outside of that, Professor Matthews, my life is my own. I’ll do whatever I want.”
Angrily, I looked away from him. I couldn’t make eye contact with him right now. I didn’t want to say anything that could jeopardize everything I had worked so hard for.
In the next room I spotted Christie. She was seated at the kitchen counter with several other people. A man was pouring a clear golden liquid into several small glasses that were lined up in front of them.
Professor Matthews hadn’t moved. He was so close to me I could feel the heat from his body radiating towards mine. Having him so close confused me. I looked up at him out of the corner of my eye and noticed his chin dimple and then his kissable lips. Thinking of him like that made me even angrier.
I wasn’t myself. Suddenly I needed to prove to my professor that I was an adult and could do whatever I wanted. Whether he approved of it or not. I bee-lined over to Christie and picked up one of the filled glasses.
“Hey! What’s the big idea?” she asked, surprised.
“I need a drink,” I said.
“Wait—”
Before she could finish her sentence, the dark liquid was down my throat. It tasted like liquid fire and left a trail from my mout
h, down my throat, and into my stomach. I was pretty sure if I wanted to impersonate a dragon, now would be a good time.
“That’s whiskey,” Christie said. “It’s really strong stuff.”
She looked at me, her eyes wide with concern. A quick glance to the next room told me my professor was watching me with a stunned expression on his face.
I wanted to cough and choke up what I had just drank. I wanted to run to the sink and shove my mouth under the running faucet. But I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of being able to say he was right, I was a ridiculously delicate fucking flower.
I forced a smile and picked up another shot of whiskey. I had seen enough movies to know it would go down easier if I drank it fast. I jerked my head back as I drank the next shot. Then I slammed the shot glass down onto the counter and glared at the guy with the bottle in his hand.
“Pour,” I said as I moved the shot glass towards him.
He filled the glass. I kept my face straight to hide the revulsion I felt towards the whiskey before pouring it down my throat.
“You got anything stronger?” I asked.
“What the hell, Sarah?” Christie said. “What’s going on with you?”
The would-be bartender took out another bottle, and quickly filled another glass. I glanced back over to where Professor Matthews was standing, but he wasn’t there any more.
I pushed the glass away and stumbled onto a nearby stool. What was wrong with me? In my anger I went from trying to show him I was an adult and I ended up acting like a foolish child.
The room spun a little and I realized I never had anything to eat. I had been so head’s down working on my thesis, that I had forgotten to have anything all day. This was not how I wanted the night to turn out.
As I licked my lips, trying to get some moisture into my mouth, Christie shoved another red plastic cup in front of me.
“Drink,” she said. “It’s water. You’re not looking very well. You’d better not hurl.”
I shook my head with embarrassment, unable to look at her, before taking a sip of the cold liquid.
“I’m fine,” I said. “I forgot to eat today, that’s all.”
“So that’s why you turned into some cliché party girl?”
“Ugh, no. I don’t want to talk about that now. Can we just go already? I think I’ve had enough fun for one night,” I said. “Plus I need to finish my thesis. I just need to eat something first.”
The thought of Professor Matthews seeing me act like an idiot after I spent so long trying to gain his respect, killed me. He was right—what was wrong with me?
“You’ll have to tell me about it one day,” Christie said with a sigh. “Let’s go. This party is lame anyway. You should probably get some rest before finishing your thesis anyway. I think maybe you just need some sleep. You’ve been under a lot of stress.”
As I slid off the stool, the room jerked before tilting to the side. The last thing I remembered was everything going black.
Chapter Five
I woke the next morning with a horrible headache. I kept my eyes closed, knowing that the brightness of the outside world was too much for me to face. As I laid there I wondered if this was from the shots or if the stress from school finally caught up to me. It was probably a combination of both.
Slowly, I opened one eye. A sharp pain rang through my head. I groaned and turned away from the sun.
“Oh good, you’re awake,” Christie said.
“Shhh. Why are you yelling?”
“I’m not. I’m speaking like I always do. You’re a fucking idiot, Sarah.”
“I know,” I said as I covered my head with my pillow. “I know I’m an idiot. Now I feel like hell and I still have my thesis to finish.”
I peeked out from under the pillow. Christie was sitting in the corner of my room, still dressed in the same clothes from the night before. Looking under the sheets, I found I was still in the same clothes too.
I sat up and rubbed my eyes before slapping my cheeks a bit to knock the fog out of my head.
“God, I barely remember anything after you said we were going home,” I said.
“I didn’t think you would. You scared the shit out of me,” she said.
I nodded as I weaved my fingers through my tangled hair.
“I know. I should know better,” I said.
“You’re a fucking diabetic,” she said as she got up and whacked me with a pillow. “You didn’t eat and then you did those ridiculous shots. What were you thinking? You’re lucky I was there.”
I took a deep breath. She was right. Even in the haze of my pain, I knew better. Usually I was really good about making sure my sugar didn’t drop too low, but I had been so busy making school and graduating with honors such a priority that I stopped taking care of myself.
What good was any of it if the first moment I try to relax and have fun, I ended up passing out? I was going to graduate with highest honors. I should be smart. And until that moment I thought I had more than just book smarts. Now I wasn’t so sure.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I was just so angry that I snapped. I should have realized it was the hunger taking over, but I couldn’t think straight. I must have ruined the night for you.”
“No, stop blaming yourself. I’m just glad I was there when it happened and I got some help. I don’t know if I would have been able to do that alone.”
I took a deep breath as I realized how lucky I was that she was there when it happened. What if it had been just a few minutes before? Would Tom have helped me? I doubted it.
“Thank you, Christie. I was an idiot. Thank you for saving me from myself.”
“Hey, that’s what friends are for. You take the good with the bad. I know you’d do the same for me.”
As I swung my legs over the side of the bed, ready to stand, I realized something.
“Wait,” I paused as my mind slowly replayed what she said. “You had help? You didn’t take care of me alone?”
“Nope, I got lucky,” she said. “I didn’t know what was going on. One second you were ready to go home and the next, it was like your legs turned into Jello. As I tried to catch you so you wouldn’t hurt yourself, Professor Matthews showed up. He picked you up and carried you home.”
“Really? Professor Matthews did that?”
“Yeah. I told him the last thing you said was that you needed to eat and he told me you’re diabetic. Why didn’t you tell me? We were going to take you to the hospital, but you woke up once we got outside. You mumbled something about candy and Professor Matthews made me dig some out of your pocket.”
I reached into my pocket where I always kept my emergency stash of Life Savers. How could I let myself get so bad? Usually I was much more careful.
“I’m sorry,” I said. I couldn’t stop apologizing to Christie. “I thought you knew, but it’s not something I talk about much. Professor Matthews only knows because I got the shakes in class one day and he asked if I was alright.” I kept thinking how bad things could have been if I was alone or if she simply wasn’t around to help me. But it wasn’t just her who was there for me, Professor Matthews was too. “Thanks for taking care of me. I can’t believe Professor Matthews came back. I’ll have to tell you about what happened that set me off. I can’t believe he carried me home.”
“He didn’t just carry you home, he stayed with you the whole night. We were both here,” she said before she started laughing. “You called him some wild things last night. You did some wild things too. You might as well have been drunk!”
“What are you talking about?” Suddenly I remembered grabbing Professor Matthews’ pants. I hoped that was a dream, but I had a sinking feeling in my stomach that it actually happened. “What did I do?”
“Well, to start off you called him an asshole about a dozen times. Then you called him a sexy beast. Then an asshole again.”
Christie was laughing so much her whole body was shaking.
“Keep going,” I said, knowing the worse w
as coming.
“Okay, if you insist,” she said between gasping for air as she giggled uncontrollably. “You grabbed his pants and tried to pull them down! I had to yank you off him, but then you called me an asshole. Then you turned back to him and called him an asshole again for not letting you suck his cock.”
I covered my face with my hands. “I’m sorry. It’s happened before, but not in a long time. It’s like that little bit of sugar after nothing makes me drunk. Please tell me that’s the worst of it.”
“It’s not,” she said as she held her side while she laughed. “It gets better. Let’s see…you told him you wanted to have his babies. You were thrusting your crotch at him like this.”
She stood up and swung her hips wildly forward over and over. It was the least sexy thing I had ever seen and if I wasn’t so embarrassed I would have been laughing at Christie’s movements. I hung my head in shame thinking I had done it to Professor Matthews. How was he going to respect me now? I hoped it wouldn’t make him grade my thesis even harder.
“I think you even flashed him once.”
“No! Please tell me you’re making this up. Did I really do all that?”
“Yes. It’s almost hard to believe you’re really a virgin. You were such a slut,” she said, laughing even harder. “It was quite a show. The highlight of my night really. Now I have a lot of ammunition against you. I’m talking like years and years worth.”
“You would use this, wouldn’t you?” I was glad Christie saw the humor in my embarrassment. “Is there anything else I should know about?”
“More than you trying to rape the professor you claim to hate? Nah, that was about it. You know, other than sleeping until 3PM.”
“Wait, what?” I quickly stood up and blinked at the clock on my wall until the numbers came into focus. A cold shiver went down my spine as I remembered my schedule. “Shit! I slept through my class with Professor Matthews. It ends in thirty minutes and my thesis isn’t even done.”
I grabbed a skirt, blouse, and a fresh set of bra and panties before dashing into the bathroom. I didn’t want to face the class reeking of sweat and booze. I definitely didn’t want Professor Matthews to get a reminder of what an idiot I was last night. It was bad enough I didn’t have my paper done.
