Insatiable

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Insatiable Page 1

by Daniele Lanzarotta




  Praise for the Mermaid’s Curse

  Think of it as a modern day THE LITTLE MERMAID with a NEW ADULT kick to it. Perfectly paced story, intriguing characters, and intense scenes had me flying through this book and eager for book 2.

  —I Read Indie

  ***

  Fairytale romance meets the real world creating a forbidden love that I just can't get enough of!

  —Kim Duncan (2011 Books With Bite)

  ***

  I fell in love with the whole book from beginning to end, it was romantic and full of suspense, and I never knew what was going to happen next.

  —Starry Night Book Reviews

  ***

  I loved the three main characters so much for different reasons. We see so much growth from each of them. Arianna is a heroine you just fall in love with from page one and you want her to have her dreams come true.

  —Sabrina’s Paranormal Palace

  Credits

  Written by

  Daniele Lanzarotta

  Edited by Michelle Johnson

  Art Direction Meredith Hancock

  Front cover photography © Michelle Monique Photography

  © Copyright 2013 Daniele Lanzarotta

  All rights reserved

  ISBN-13: 978-1-937121-99-0

  eISBN: 978-1-939954-05-3

  Library of Congress Control Number: 2013934592

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblances to actual events, locales, persons living or deceased, is entirely coincidental.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  To my hubs and daughter for putting up with the crazy lifestyle of an author.

  To the readers who motivated me to write a more adult book.

  To my beta readers, Jen Holcomb and Amanda Sorrells. You are both awesome! Jen, thanks for staying up during all kinds of crazy hours to talk about the characters and the story.

  To my hubs (again) and to YA author and friend Natalie Star, for the proofreading.

  To Michelle Johnson, my editor for life. Keep those comments coming. They make my day.

  … and to everyone who is searching for their own fairy tale.

  Chapter One

  He’s smiling down at me and all I can do is look away. Happiness seems to be such a rare emotion for him, it always has, and I know it’s only a matter of time until I become the one responsible for that smile turning into something dark.

  He places his finger under my chin, lifting my head up. “Well, do you regret it?” he asks.

  I want to tell him the truth, that I don’t regret it, that I’d rather have had one day with him than none at all, but the words don’t come out at first. I take a deep breath and I know that I have to lie. I have to push him as far away from me as I can, because I have no other option. So I focus on the part that I do regret. I focus on the fact that when offered my dreams to be made true, consequences didn’t even cross my mind. Not just consequences to myself, but I also never once stopped to think about how my choices would impact those around me, how they would impact him.

  All I can think is that my next words are going to shatter everything that both of us have lived for in the past few weeks.

  ***

  There was only one thing that I ever wished for: to be human. I always felt like I didn’t belong. My dad used to tell me stories about the human world and how lucky I was to live in a place even humans considered magical. I used to believe that to be true. Everything seemed so fun: swimming all day, seeing the different colors around, and exploring the ships that ended up on the bottom of the ocean. One day, I stopped feeling like that.

  My dad and I lived near an island, which seemed to be owned by one family only; after all, they were always the only ones there. Every summer when they came, I would swim as close to the island as I could and hide behind the rocks to watch them. I wasn’t trying to be creepy, I was just curious about their world.

  Years ago, when I was eleven years old, I was hiding behind the rocks when I saw the boy who looked a little older than me. He seemed so mad. I saw a woman coming out of the house yelling, ‘Blake! He didn’t mean it!’

  The boy just ignored her and ran toward the other side of the island. That was the day my life changed. I hated what I was because I wanted to go after him and see if he was okay, but I couldn’t.

  All I could do was swim back as fast as I could and hide in one of the wrecked ships that wasn’t too far away from my home. I was so mad about what I was and how limited I was because of it, that I didn’t want to see anyone.

  I finally decided to go home when it started to get dark. It was only a matter of time before dad decided to send the whole kingdom to look for me.

  On the way back, I ran into my friend Desiree. Like me, she liked to watch the humans every once in a while. She came to tell me the humans were leaving and to ask if I wanted to watch them go. I told her I had to get back and that was it.

  That was the last time I saw him that summer, but they always came back. Year-after-year, I watched the boy come back to the island. I knew that whenever he was alone, he was the saddest being I had ever seen. I also knew that there were a few things that always made him smile. He loved reading and writing, spending time with his younger brother, and years later, his little sister. I caught myself laughing with them several times, as he played with her at the beach. And then there was this year, the most horrible year of my life… the year I turned eighteen. That was when I saw him with a girl, both lying down on a blanket at the beach, and I felt things that I had never felt before. When he leaned on top of her and I saw his lips touching hers, I wanted to be that girl. I wanted to have legs instead of a stupid tail. I wanted to be the one he kissed.

  Chapter Two

  The girl was gone the next day, but Blake stayed. The next night, I was hiding behind the rocks as usual, when I heard screams. I saw a surfboard turn and the little girl getting lost in the waves. I swam to the little girl as fast as I could and dragged her to the rocks. I then swam around the rocks so no one could see me from the island. I sat her up there, and she caught her breath, coughing up water. Luckily, she hadn’t been underwater long.

  “How old are you?” I asked.

  She held five fingers up.

  From a distance, I could hear a guy’s voice yell, “Molly, stay where you are!”

  I peeked around the corner and saw Blake take his shirt off as he ran toward the ocean, throwing his shirt on the sand before he jumped in the water.

  “Molly, I need you to stay right here, okay?” I said.

  She looked down in the water and the smile on her face told me that she could see my bright blue tail.

  Still smiling, she nodded. I smiled back at her. “This is our secret,” I said as I winked at her.

  I swam away before he could see me and only stopped when I was sure the darkness would keep him from seeing me. Even then, this was the closest I had ever been to him. I turned around and watched to make sure she was safe.

  Blake climbed up on the rocks with her to make sure that she was okay, and I felt as if my entire body was melting. I wanted to get closer. I wished I could get closer to him more than I ever wished for anything else.

  He asked the little girl to hold tight to him and swam back to the island as I swam away back to my own reality.

  I took my time as I swam back. Dolphins swam around me and for the first time, they didn’t make me laugh; nothing did. I stopped right before I got near my home and just watched the other merfolk from the distance. My life would never be any different than this. We lived in a community with little over thirty merfolk and that would never change. I would never meet anyone new, at least not my age or older, only the offspring of the
merfolk who I already knew. Even our homes didn’t feel like our own. They all came from someone else’s tragedies. Our entire world was built and furnished with what we got out of wrecked ships over the centuries. Most had only one or two rooms for privacy. There were windows that we used to swim in and out of. My home was the biggest and the saddest. Dad made our community build around a large ship that he claimed as our home decades before. Every room was filled with human belongings that only made me wonder more and more about that world.

  When I returned, my father was waiting for me and he wasn’t happy.

  “Were you watching the humans again?” he asked in a cold tone.

  I nodded.

  He shook his head and sat down. “I worry about you, Arianna. You have no friends. And then there’s Bram. He’s a good man and he has been asking you to be his for so long.”

  “Dad, I’m not a thing that should ‘belong’ to someone.”

  “That’s not what I meant, Arianna.”

  “Isn’t it though? That’s how we live, Dad. We belong to our parents until we get married and belong to someone else. That’s not what I want.”

  “That’s called tradition, Arianna. Watching the humans for as long as you have has put ideas into your head that should never be there. You are not human and never will be. You are my daughter, and as the ruler of our kingdom, I’ll not allow you to be a bad example for the others.”

  I stood there, speechless. Tears sprung to my eyes. My dad had never spoken to me as a ruler.

  His tone didn’t soften one bit as he continued. “I can’t take any chances, Arianna. Our kingdom has questioned my ability to rule ever since your mother left.”

  “But you are a good leader. If they don’t see that—“

  “Arianna, enforcing traditions is a part of being a good King. You should’ve been married two years ago.”

  “What are you saying, dad?”

  “I’m saying that you’ll marry Bram tomorrow evening.”

  “What? But—There is no time to—”

  My failed attempt to find excuses to avoid this wedding never stood a chance. Father said everything would be ready and there was no changing his mind.

  I turned around to leave.

  “Sit down, Arianna,” he said in a firm tone.

  Avoiding his gaze, I sat down. I hoped that if I didn’t argue back, he would come to his senses.

  “Lyra, Anthea, Amias!” he yelled.

  The three came as fast as they could. There was a sense of urgency to my father’s voice at that moment. He was using his ‘ruler voice’, which he rarely did at home.

  As soon as they were all in the room, father started to spill orders. “Lyra, I need you to go find Bram and bring him to me. Amias, escort my daughter to her room and make sure she doesn’t go anywhere. Lyra, Arianna is getting married tomorrow evening. Make sure everything is ready for the ceremony.”

  They were all as shocked as I was.

  “GO!” Father yelled.

  Amias faced me, and I swam to my room with him following me.

  “What did you do to make him so mad?”

  I shrugged.

  “You were watching the humans again, weren’t you?”

  I gave him a cold look hoping that would be enough for him to leave me alone.

  Amias put his hands up. “Sorry. None of my business, I know.”

  I swam into my room, leaving Amias behind along with the ripples of water that I created as I swam past him.

  ***

  I thought about running away, but there was literally no way out. I was confined in my own home and knowing my father, or at least the ruler version of my father, I knew this was it.

  I knew Bram would be happy. At least that made one of us. Bram was like me, born in the same world. He wasn’t bad looking either. Bram was tanned, with abs that made other girls dream of being with him. His dark brown hair came to right above his shoulders and he had dark brown eyes, unlike most mermen, who have either green or blue eyes, and his tail was golden, which was a perfect match for his tanned skin. Bram should’ve been what I wanted, but I felt nothing. Still, I didn’t think this was fair not just to me, but to him as well. My heart belonged to someone else and even if that was like a far away dream, I knew there was no one else for me.

  Chapter Three

  I stayed in my room until Lyra swam inside to get me in the morning. That entire night I had done nothing but think about Blake. I knew how stupid I was being, after all, he was human and I wasn’t. No matter how I felt, this would never happen.

  Lyra’s cheerful mood was gone as soon she laid eyes on me.

  “You look terrible.”

  I didn’t even respond.

  Lyra was my favorite person to talk to. She knew more about the human world than anyone else, in fact, she taught me a lot about humans. Rumors were that she used black magic to learn those things. But as much as I loved talking to her, right at that moment, I didn’t want to have anything to do with her or anyone else.

  She got closer to me. “You are very lucky, you know?”

  “How so?”

  “Bram is a great guy and he’s so handsome. I could stare at his abs and those deep brown eyes of his all day long. It could be worse.”

  “But it’s not fair to me or to him.”

  “Arianna, let’s be honest. If it’s not him, it’ll be someone else who is chosen for you. You should have been married by your age and it’s not like you’ll get up one day and meet someone new. What you see here in this kingdom, well, your choices are limited to the people you grew up with.”

  My mind said she was right and that I needed to go along with it. My heart said that everything about this was wrong and that I’d regret it for the rest of my life, which wasn’t that long to begin with. Have you ever seen an old mermaid? Exactly. Mermen’s life expectancies are much longer than mermaids. I’ll be lucky if I make it to forty.

  I nodded and Lyra probably assumed that she had finally gotten the message across.

  After that she left me alone in my own misery.

  ***

  It’s funny how whenever you want time to stand still, it seems to go by even faster. That day was a blur.

  No one besides Amias and Lyra came into my room. Father was probably avoiding me. Amias came in to bring food and Lyra had everything else that I needed delivered right to my room.

  My brown hair, which was usually wavy and down to my waist, was braided with soft purple coral added in. Other than that, there was so little that we ever did about clothes, with a tail and all. My blue tail was decorated with a silver chain around my waist, and I wore a white bathing suit top with it. It wasn’t tradition so much as the fact that our clothes, just like everything else, came from what we found in wrecked ships. This top was one of the few that had been handed down to me.

  At some point throughout the day, anxiety turned into numbness. I didn’t want to hate my father for this. I loved him more than anything. I told myself over and over again that this was our way of life and although my mind understood what was expected, my heart didn’t.

  Then, darkness fell and I knew it was time.

  Father came in to escort me to the area where our kingdom performed the ceremonies.

  “You look beautiful, Arianna,” he said.

  I gave him a sad smile, and he pretended not to notice the sad part.

  “Well, we shouldn’t keep Bram waiting any longer. He has already waited his entire life for this. You can’t begin to imagine how happy he is, Arianna. And you may not feel this way right now, but you’ll grow to love him. It’s only a matter of time.”

  Yeah, that’s what I keep hearing, I thought to myself.

  As we approached the location for the ceremony, I started to see the merfolk in our kingdom whispering and smiling. They all seemed to be having a great time. Then, we approached the center of where the ceremony would be held, by my father, of course.

  The look on Bram’s face when he saw me made me feel eve
n worse about it all. He smiled from ear to ear. Some of the other women didn’t seem so happy to be there and I knew the reason. To them, Bram was a dream come true, but he just wasn’t a part of my dreams. I felt even more horrible thinking that one of those girls could make him truly happy.

  Bram took my hand once I approached him and his smile grew wider, if that was even possible. He let go of my hand, moving his to the small of my back as we swam toward my father.

  I wanted to turn around and swim away. I wanted to disappear and never return. All I could do as my father talked about traditions and what it meant to be married was to think about how much I wished he was not the king; how much I wished I could be human, and be able to go places where no one would find me.

  There were no questions during the ceremony. It was basically, my father telling us how things would be from that moment on and just like that, we were proclaimed married.

  When Bram leaned in to kiss me, I couldn’t help but to turn slightly away and he ended up kissing my cheek.

  I heard gasps coming from others. That was the first time ever since I first saw Bram that I noticed a flash of sadness, only for a second, but it was there and I knew this would be the start of my making us both miserable. Within a matter of seconds he was smiling again.

  Once the ceremony was over I was torn between wanting to get out of there as soon as possible and wanting to stay in order to avoid being alone with Bram. It wasn’t like we had a choice either way. The merfolk talked among one another. There were meals prepared for everyone, mostly arrangements made of seaweeds and oysters. We stayed until everyone congratulated us and wished us a lifetime of happiness. Most seemed to direct their wishes at Bram, as I basically just stood there, looking distant. I made the mistake to glance at my father once and he looked furious, but I didn’t care. I had done what he wanted me to and I didn’t have it in me to pretend to be happy about it. Finally, father dismissed us and said he would take care of the rest of the guests. He hugged me.

 

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