The final instruction came in a package that was waiting on Andy’s doorstep when he got home from work. He picked it up suspiciously but there was nothing to indicate where it had come from – just his name on the front. He slipped inside his front door and leaned against it listening, just as he had every time he came home, in case he wasn’t alone. He checked the kitchen and living room before taking off his jacket and tie, then poured himself a beer, leaving the package on the countertop where it sat like threat.
‘Just open it,’ he said to himself. ‘How bad can it be?’
He was on his second beer before he decided to find out.
The A5 envelope was padded and sealed firmly with parcel tape. It weighed next to nothing and Andy half-wondered if it was some sort of elaborate joke. He picked at the dark brown tape, reluctant to use scissors or a knife as he wasn’t sure what was inside. Finally, he managed to gain enough purchase to be able to grab the tape between the nails of two fingers and rip it off.
Gently, he squeezed the envelope until the opening at the top gaped like a mouth. There was something dark inside and a folded piece of paper. Andy tipped the contents out onto the granite surface of the kitchen counter. He poked the dark object and then unfolded the note.
Tuesday. 5.30am. Be ready. You’ll be collected.
‘What the hell…?’
He untangled the black fabric and stepped back in shock.
It was a ski mask.
13
‘I think we need to keep this group separate from the rest of the school,’ Pearson said as he opened the door to the computer room and beckoned Cam out into the corridor. ‘If they tell anybody about the gunmen it could cause a panic.’
Cam could see the wisdom in this approach but the logistics were going to be tricky. ‘We can’t keep them here,’ he said. ‘We need to get everybody off site. I think most of the students and staff should be away by now.’ He checked his watch and saw that it was half an hour since Pearson had called for backup. Time seemed to be doing strange things – it felt like hours since he’d spoken to the year twelve assembly but only a few seconds since he’d been running through the corridors to see what was happening in the humanities block. ‘Have you any idea when the specialist team will arrive?’
Pearson exhaled heavily through his nose, indicating that Cam was really testing his patience. ‘If I knew, I’d tell you. It’s over an hour from Kendal to here and there have been problems on the motorway. Even with blues and twos it’d be difficult for them to get through a blocked road.’
Cam nodded. It made sense but the panic kept telling him that they should be here by now.
‘Mr Cleaver, where can we send this group of students and teachers? We need a space that will hold them all.’
Cam thought. The theatre had been a great idea, but it had also been the obvious choice for a haven for the pupils and teachers. There were a few cafés and restaurants in town but none big enough for such a large group.
‘The leisure centre,’ he said. ‘Their main hall isn’t huge, but it should easily be big enough. It’s a ten-minute walk and it’s nowhere near the theatre. I’ll get Ruth to give them a ring.’
Pearson nodded. ‘I think that will work. I’ll ask Brooks to go with them so he can ask a few more questions.’
‘They’re good kids,’ Cam said. ‘It’s a shame they’ve got caught up in this.’
‘They’ll be fine,’ Pearson reassured him. ‘Kids that age are usually quite resilient. We’ll make sure there’s counselling for anybody who needs it.’
There would be some who’d definitely need it, Cam thought. Not just kids. There were four members of staff in the computer room and they’d all need a lot of support in the aftermath of this. And then there were the parents – how many would push for help for their children whatever their level of involvement or trauma? If he knew Fellbeck parents he’d expect at least half of the school population to be in counselling for months.
Thinking about the parents made him feel breathless with guilt and confusion. He was supposed to be keeping their loved ones safe – they trusted him – but none of them had been informed about the current danger. Not even the ones in Donna Frith’s form. Pearson had advised him to hold off contacting families until the specialist team had arrived, but he couldn’t stop thinking about his own son. How would it look if he knew what was happening to Tom but hadn’t told the other parents? And then there was Annie Bainbridge. Penny must be beside herself with terror. He’d wanted to comfort her but he knew exactly how she’d respond if he dared to touch her in school – even in a gesture of friendly affection – she was completely paranoid about the other staff knowing that they were seeing each other.
‘Right,’ Pearson said, breaking through Cam’s rambling thoughts. ‘I’ll stay here and explain to Brooks what I want him to do. I’ll see if I can get any more information from the students and staff as well. You go back to reception and see if you can get in touch with somebody at the leisure centre. I noticed there’s a phone in this classroom – when you’ve made arrangements get your secretary to ring through and we’ll get everybody out of here.’
Cam sprinted back to reception where he found Ruth and Penny deep in conversation. He wasn’t sure whether it was his imagination, but his PA seemed strangely frosty with him when he asked her to ring the leisure centre.
‘Connected,’ she said, passing him the handset. Cam fumbled it, the smooth plastic offering little purchase, but he managed to catch the cable and use it to bring the phone under control. He’d been expecting Ruth to explain and to make the arrangements – this wasn’t his job. His job was…?
‘BFL Leisure, can I help you?’
‘Yes. I– er… I’m ringing from Fellbeck Academy. I need to send some of our students across to you. Would that be possible?’
‘For which activity, sir. The main hall is booked from 11am and the pool is lane swimming until noon. The gym is available on a pay-as-you-go basis.’
‘No. I need a space to hold a group of around eighty students and staff due to an emergency evacuation. They’ll be accompanied by a police officer who’ll be able to explain fully.’
The silence at the other end of the line wasn’t reassuring. ‘You’ll need to make a booking at least–’
‘I don’t have time to make a booking! This is an emergency. I need to get these people to safety. Can you help?’
Pearson should be doing this, Cam thought. The detective inspector had the authority, but all Cam had was a loud voice and a very shallow reserve of patience.
‘Sir, as I said, the main hall is booked and that’s the only space large enough.’
‘Well unbook it! Please. The police officer will explain and I’m sure your customers will understand. The safety of these students is at stake.’
Unbelievably he was put on hold. Annoying muzak filled the earpiece but was quickly replaced by a firm female voice. ‘Hello, sir. I’m Juliet Hurd, assistant manager. Can I help you?’
Cam explained again what he wanted and, this time, he received a favourable response. The main hall would be cleared of equipment and ready to receive the group from the school in fifteen minutes. In addition, hot drinks would be available on request and free of charge.
‘Finally,’ he breathed as he passed the handset back to Ruth. ‘Please ring down to C12 and let DI Pearson know that the students are to be escorted to the leisure centre. Have you heard anything else from the humanities block?’
Ruth shook her head as she dialled the number for the computer room and turned her back to speak to the DI.
‘Penny. A word?’ He walked into his office and gestured for Penny to close the door as soon as she’d followed him inside.
‘How’re you doing? You must be worried sick.’
Concern for her daughter was etched in every line and crease of her face. The light make-up around her eyes seemed to have smudged into grey bruises and her ponytail was even looser than it had been at the start of the day.
‘I’m okay,’ she said, her voice shaky as she sat down on the chair next to the door. ‘It’s hard not to think about Annie, though. You must be the same. I just wish we knew what was happening. Why don’t they want the medical supplies anymore?’
‘False alarm?’ Cam speculated. ‘It might have been something that looked a lot worse than it was.’ He sat behind his desk and rubbed his face with both hands. ‘This is such a fucking mess,’ he said. ‘I have no idea if I’m making the right decisions. I just wish the rest of the police team would get here. I don’t know how much longer I can shoulder this responsibility. Pearson seems to be doing a good job and at least all the students and staff are off site, but I think we’re going to be next.’
Penny frowned. ‘What do you mean?’
‘They’ll ask us to leave. As soon as the specialist team’s set up, they’ll want to get rid of us. Civilians will just be a liability. We’ll be shipped off somewhere and kept in the dark.’
‘It might be better that way,’ Penny mused. ‘I just feel like I’m in the way here. And, even if I’m not, it’s not like I’m helping.’
‘Well, I’m glad you’re here,’ Cam said. ‘At least we’ve got each other.’
Penny dropped her eyes from his as flashes of pink rose across her cheeks. ‘Don’t, Cam. I don’t want to talk about us. This is about the kids.’
‘I know, but it would have been even harder without you here.’
‘You know,’ Penny snapped. ‘I’d rather have been anywhere else. I wish I’d not come to school today, and I wish Annie had taken my advice and gone shopping. I’m sorry about Tom but I can’t care about you or him. I can only think about my daughter.’
Cam stood up but Penny held out a hand, palm facing him. ‘Please don’t try to hug me. I think I’d be sick if you touched me.’
‘What?’ Cam was stunned. The woman in front of him was almost unrecognisable as the person he’d come to trust, to share parts of his life with, the woman that he thought he might, one day, fall in love with.
‘I don’t think I like you very much, Cam. I’ve tried but, really, you’re not the sort of man I want to be with. I know my timing’s shitty, but I can’t pretend, and I can’t let you offer me false hope.’
‘But…’
‘Ruth knows about us. She just told me. I think she twigged a while ago, so I didn’t see much point in denying it. I got the impression that she thinks you took advantage–’
‘Why would she think that? What have you said? If anything, it’s the other way round. Christ, Penny. After everything I’ve done.’
Penny stood up and placed a hand on the door handle. ‘I know, Cam. How can I be such a bitch after everything you’ve done? Let’s hope nobody finds out, eh?’
Something about her tone, about her eyes and the hint of a smirk on her lips had Cam reaching for the computer mouse on his desk as soon as the door closed behind her.
What the hell did she mean? And who had she told?
Before
Grief was crippling. If anybody had asked Cam beforehand what it would be like to be bereaved, he’d have probably compared it to depression – he hadn’t been prepared for the physicality of loss.
The lack of sleep had only been part of it – it was difficult to function in a state of permanent exhaustion – but, at times, he’d felt Chrissie’s absence in a visceral way that made him double over in pain.
The first year had been the hardest. Every day was a reminder that ‘this time last year’ he and Chrissie had been doing something, however mundane. Birthdays were hard and the first Christmas had been brutal as he’d tried to ease Tom through their muted festivities.
He’d not been prepared to be a single parent. Chrissie had taken care of most of the emotional side of Tom’s life – she’d been his son’s confidante whereas he’d been the authority figure. After Chrissie’s death he found a huge gulf between himself and his son and he had no idea how to bridge it, especially when Tom was lashing out at everybody and everything.
Very slowly, father and son had moulded their relationship into a new shape, something that just about worked but that satisfied neither of them fully. Tom turned out to be a half-decent cook and Cam was more than happy to let him organise meals whenever he had time. Cam had tried to spend less time at work and had found himself delegating some tasks to Penny Bainbridge, despite his slight distrust of the woman. In retrospect he could see that the personal relationship had developed from their professional one and now it was partly based on mutual suspicion.
He’d been surprised when Penny had made the first move and even more surprised by his own response. She’d asked him out for a curry – nothing complicated, nothing heavy with suggestion – and he’d accepted, instantly. Three weeks later and they’d shared a kiss. Then everything had changed between them and now Cam had no idea where the relationship might go, or how to end it. Did he even want to end it? He’d thought Penny might sleep with him after she’d invited him over while the kids were away but things hadn’t got that far – there was too much between them that was left unspoken.
And then Tom had seen his car parked outside Penny’s house and all the work they’d done on their relationship since Chrissie had died counted for nothing.
‘Tom, you’ve got to talk to me some time.’
The silence from his son’s bedroom door said much more than words could have.
‘Come on, Tom. It’s not what you think.’ Cam cringed at the cliché. What was he thinking? ‘Tom. Let’s talk about this. Please.’
Nothing.
Cam considered walking downstairs and leaving his son to come round in his own time but he knew from past experience that this might allow their relationship to fester and then all that would be left were scabs and scars for them to worry at for years.
‘Tom!’ Cam snapped, throwing open his son’s bedroom door. ‘We need to sort this out.’
His son was lying on his bed with his headphones on. Now the wooden barrier of the door had been removed, Cam could clearly hear the hiss and thud of the loud music that Tom had chosen to lose himself in. That’s why he hadn’t responded.
Tom’s eyes were closed but there was no possibility that he could be sleeping through whatever racket he’d chosen as the soundtrack to his misery.
‘Hey!’ Cam inched closer and tapped his son’s leg causing Tom to flinch violently.
‘Fuck! Why didn’t you knock?’ He was scrambling to sit up and remove the headphones at the same time and he managed to get himself tangled in the cable.
‘Here,’ Cam said gently and leaned in to help his son extricate himself.
‘Don’t touch me. I’ll do it,’ Tom said, reminding Cam of his son’s independence as a child. From the age of three or four Tom had hardly ever allowed Cam or Chrissie to help him with any physical feat and it seemed to have become a matter of pride with him to do everything on his own. He’d been such a self-contained, serious child.
‘Tom. I know you’re angry, but can we talk about it?’
Tom shook his head, his mother’s dark hair flopping across one eye. ‘What is there to talk about? It’s not like I tell you anything about my personal life and I really don’t need a man-to-man chat.’
Cam leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms. He’d expected rejection but hadn’t really prepared himself for his son’s coldness towards him. He thought there might be some yelling and he’d have to do some explaining but he felt like Tom had cut him off.
‘At least let me explain,’ he tried.
‘Explain? You’re shagging Penny Bainbridge. What is there to explain? I know the facts of life – I’m studying biology.’
‘It’s not like that.’
‘What? So, you’re in love with her and you’re going to marry her? That was quick. It’s not even three years since Mum died.’
Cam saw tears welling in Tom’s eyes as he mentioned his mother, but he removed them with two quick swipes of his knuckles.
&n
bsp; ‘Tom, I’m not trying to replace your mum. This thing with Penny, it’s new. I don’t know if it’ll go anywhere.’
Tom sighed and flopped back on to his bed. ‘I’ve just started seeing Annie. You’ve really messed that up for me. She might end up being my stepsister. This is fucking sick.’
So that was the real reason for Tom’s extreme reaction. Young love. Cam knew he’d have to tread carefully even though he doubted Tom and Annie’s relationship would last more than a few months. His son didn’t seem to be able to make his girlfriends stick around for long – not that he’d had many since Chrissie had died.
‘Look, I don’t know where things are going with Penny. It’s early days. But if you want me to stop seeing her, well, I will.’
It was a gamble. But, if Tom called his bluff, Cam was prepared to end the relationship – his son was more important. ‘I can’t be responsible for that,’ Tom said, sitting up. ‘You can’t put that on me. Who you sleep with is up to you but don’t expect me to be happy about it.’
‘So, what do you want?’ Cam asked. ‘What can I do to make this better for you?’
Tom lowered his head and started to pick at a thread on the duvet cover. ‘I don’t know. This just feels all wrong. I might get used to it, but I don’t really want to have to. And I don’t know where this leaves me and Annie.’
Cam edged inside the door and perched on Tom’s gaming chair that was hooked up to his games console and TV.
‘I know this is strange. I think you should keep seeing Annie. She’s a nice girl and I think she might be good for you.’
Don't Breathe Page 12
