by Melody Rose
“The new riddle,” Hannan admitted with a sigh.
“A new what?” I shouted, releasing my frustration into the air.
The culmination of the previous events in the Library plus the lack of food or appropriate rest finally caused me to explode. I stomped off past the group, not really sure where I was headed, so I paged Monte.
“Where the hell are you?” I barked down the line.
“Eva!” Monte responded, not answering me right away, which only fueled my frustration. “You are alright! I missed your voice. I was worried when none of you arrived, but when Hannan and Julei--”
“Where are you right now?” I asked, my message even more urgent and forceful.
There was a pause from the dragon. I knew he could hear me, but he just wasn’t responding.
“Monte!” I pressed. “Where are you?”
“Due north, by a grove of trees,” the dragon answered, displeased with my tone.
I didn’t care. I was so frustrated with the situation that I blazed forward blindly. I let my anger lead the way as I stumbled into the clearing the dragons described.
The snow was mostly cleared here, swept away by the dragons and their tails. The ground beneath was muddy and made an obnoxious squelching noise as I trudged along. It undermined the effect I was going for, which only annoyed me more.
“Where is the book?” I order the dragons.
The three of them stood together, each the tip of a triangle. In the center of their formation lay the book. It was splayed open, but something about it looked off. The dragons gave me a clear path as I approached. I bent down and picked up the edges of the book, then brought it up to my face as if seeing it closer would allow me to better understand it.
The only thing I saw was a square cut out in the middle of the pages. We had kept the book closed the entire time in the Library, so we never saw the deliberate damage to the center of the pages. It was just deep enough to put something in, to hide something. Like a key.
“Well, where is it?” I asked though the strength that once was in my voice weakened to a whine. “Where is the key?”
“We do not know, Eva,” Monte said, sympathy in his voice
“No,” I cried as my resolve crumbled. “This can’t be.”
“We did not want to believe it either.” My djer reached out towards me with his wing, but I backed away from it, rejecting his gesture. Monte’s wing recoiled back into his body, and he grimaced.
“I don’t understand,” I muttered to the book as if it were the one at fault. “It was supposed to be in here. Everything in the riddle pointed to it being down in the Library.”
“It was there,” Hannan said, entering the clearing. Julei and Freja followed behind him, like a funeral dirge. “We were right.”
“Then, where is it now?” I asked the group, feeling like a raving madwoman.
“That is what we are trying to find out,” Zulu said. She reached her head under her wing and came back with a piece of parchment in her mouth. She walked forward and leaned down to put the paper atop the open book I held in my hand.
I read the words scrawled in a messy script like someone was in a hurry to write it. It said:
Watched by unsafe eyes
The key could not stay
Apologies to be sure
For you’ve been lead astray
A gift was given
To friends in the middle of the sea
Another kingdom, another time
Where dragons once swam free
I released my frustration into the wild in the form of a growl. “I will never understand this riddle bullshit. Why can’t anyone just give us clear directions for once?”
“They certainly do not wish to make it easy,” Julei muttered.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and pushed the tears back down. I was worn, pushed past my limits. The Library shook me to my core and whittled me down to almost empty. I hadn’t been empty since curing Heloise’s hometown, and I never wanted to be incapacitated like that again. I promised all of my friends that I wouldn’t ever do that again, but underground, I had been close.
All I wanted was a nap and a hot meal and that damn key. But according to the universe, that was too much to ask for.
“Eva,” Monte prodded gently.
At first, I couldn’t tell if the dragon was speaking to me in my mind or aloud, so I looked up. When I did, I found that six pairs of eyes were on me. Understandably so, since I was standing in the middle of a clearing on the verge of having a tantrum.
“Yes?” I said after taking a breath.
“You do not look well,” the dragon said cautiously. “You should rest.”
I knew he was right, but pride pushed me onward. “There’s no time to rest. We have to figure out this stupid riddle.”
“We will work on the riddle,” Monte assured me. “You need to recover. From what we know about the Library, it was a harrowing experience that you need to heal from.”
“I’m fine,” I said heatedly. I even turned in a circle with my arms splayed out to prove it. “See? All healed up.”
“She healed both of us,” Freja interjected, “and used the light the whole time we were down there.”
I glared at Freja. “Traitor,” I said half-heartedly.
Freja didn’t appear to be bothered by my insult. Instead, she approached me with steady steps. In one fluid motion, Freja put her hands on mine and forced me to close the book. Then she took hold of it firmly and pulled it from my grasp.
And I let her.
“We have guarded your packs,” Zulu informed me. “Take one and find some dry ground on which to rest.”
“There will be no more snow for a while yet,” Gideonia reported, the first thing she said the whole time we’d been back.
I slumped over to the dragons and grabbed my bag. Without looking back at the group, I ventured away from them and out of the clearing.
Not far away, there was a small hill I trudged up. There were no trees at the top, so I laid out my blankets and stuffed my pack underneath my head. Despite how worn out my body was, sleep did not come. I watched the sun set fully, and the moon made its appearance to watch over the evening. Whispers of clouds floated across the deep violet sky, but mostly it was clear. I stared up, unmoving from my spot for hours. I willed myself to close my eyes and rest, but whenever I shut my eyes, visions of moles, snakes, gap-toothed men, and golden-haired women interrupted my attempts at sleep.
So, to play it safe, I kept my eyes open and stayed awake.
Disappointment rolled around in my stomach, and the motion made me seasick. I couldn’t believe that, after that whole ordeal, we only ended up with another stupid riddle.
Something told me that I shouldn’t be surprised. There would be no reason that it would be so easy. What were the odds that we would actually get our piece of the key on the first try? During the very first trial? Any story should have prepared me for that not to be the case.
When my thoughts traveled to the pieces of the key, I thought about the other group. I missed having the other dragons around to help ease the tension and be a friendly face. I hoped that Heloise and Stella were surviving life out on the road. I wondered if Troylan had said more than six words during the entire journey.
Then my mind drifted to Kehn. A surprising ache buckled underneath the thought. It jarred me so violently, I sat up for the first time in hours. I placed a flat hand on my chest and felt my own heart pound.
I swallowed and breathed through the sharp sting right against my breast. It was such a foreign feeling that I couldn’t put a name to it right away. After some thought, I discovered the word: longing.
That definition scared me. I did what I could to suppress it, thinking that I was probably in need of some endorphins and fast. But unfortunately, no matter what I tried to change my thoughts to, now that I had noticed it, that weird pain wouldn’t go away.
“Mind if I intrude?” Hannan asked as he ventured over the hill.
<
br /> His voice interrupted my thoughts, and it took me a minute to decipher his request, almost as if I was translating it from another language.
“Oh, yeah, sure,” I said.
“You do not sound sure?” Hannan questioned with a raised eyebrow. He carried one of the two lanterns we brought along with us. In fact, now that I thought about it, this was the first time I’d seen anyone use them.
“No, I’m sure.” I made sure to brighten my voice. I scooted over slightly and patted the grass beside me. “I was just distracted.”
Hannan’s face broke into an endearing smile, and he pushed his glasses up his nose with his free hand. The caretaker approached me and placed the lantern between the two of us so that we could see each other more clearly. Then he removed his pack from his back and spread out his own blanket before plopping onto the ground next to me.
There was only an inch between our shoulders as we leaned back on our arms, legs outstretched in the same physical position. I noticed his nearness and willed myself to stay still. I wanted him to come closer, but something about the desire spooked me.
I had just been thinking about how much I missed Kehn. I didn’t want Hannan to be the satisfactory distraction. He didn’t deserve that. Though, when I gazed at his sharp features, made deeper by the firelight, that ache subsided. A new sense of longing, one that didn’t hurt so much but instead warmed my belly, stirred.
“What had you so distracted?” Hannan asked, pulling me out of my thoughts once again.
“Uh…” I hesitated. I didn’t know what to tell him exactly what, so I landed on the truth. “The other group.”
“Oh,” Hannan said knowingly.
We both stopped talking, and it was as though Kehn was right there on that hill with us, sitting between our bodies. It was an awkward feeling that I didn’t know how to erase.
“Before we left,” Hannan said, his voice trembling, “when I walked in on you and him…”
“Nothing happened,” I filled in the blanks. “We just slept together. I mean, just slept. We didn’t do anything… else.”
Suddenly I realized I had no idea if the same verbiage for relationships and sex was used in this world. Did Hannan understand what I meant? It seemed to matter to him, but maybe it only mattered that it was Kehn? That would make sense considering their previous history.
What I did know was that these types of conversations were just as awkward anywhere, no matter the dimension.
“I have strong feelings for you, Eva,” Hannan blurted out. The words came out in a rush, like a landslide. “Strong feelings of a sexual nature. And of a compassionate, loving nature. You are one of the most intriguing, intelligent, and beautiful women I have ever met.”
I was stunned. His words warmed my heart and made it swell. My breath caught a little bit which surprised me all over again.
“Thank you,” I said, the only words I could manage to get out at that moment.
“You are welcome,” Hannan responded. He turned to look at me directly, and his brown eyes caught mine. “I was not sure my feelings were obvious, so I felt the need to tell you. In case I never got the chance.”
“What do you mean by that?” I asked, suddenly worried.
“We are on quite a dangerous quest if you haven’t noticed,” Hannan said with a nervous chuckle. “Death is certainly a realistic possibility.”
“Not for me, it’s not,” I answered indignantly.
“Eva,” Hannan scoffed, “do not tell me that you expect to thwart death.”
“No,” I replied with a scoff of my own. “I know that’s impossible, but I don’t expect to die on this adventure. I expect to die when I am old and wrinkled and have lived a long life, long after this adventure is over.”
Hannan barked out a laugh, aimed at the sky. He sat up, pushing himself up off his hands, then lifted his knees and leaned forward so he could rest his arms on them, interlacing his fingers in the center.
I wiggled my feet back and forth under the blanket, nervously. “I plan to live longer than my parents did.”
Hannan nodded, slow and understanding. “What do you want to do with this long life of yours?”
The question caught me off guard. “I don’t know. I guess I haven’t really thought about it.”
“Not at all?” Hannan asked curiously.
“I don’t like to think about the future,” I replied, the honesty sliding off my tongue so easily like it always did when I conversed with Hannan. “Or at least, I don’t like making plans. They always get disrupted. I have no idea what’s in store. There have been too many unknowns and surprises in my life to make any sort of plan.”
“Like falling down a well into another world?” Hannan jested.
“Or making connections with a bunch of dragons and finding out you’re their queen?” I added, one-upping him.
“Or becoming the first commoner to be introduced to court?” Hannan continued, building on the game.
“Or shooting light from your hands?” I wiggled my fingers in front of our faces for emphasis.
Hannan took my fingers and put them together, between his own hands. Suddenly, the moment shifted. Once filled with jokes and teasing, it was now serious and sincere. I sensed the change in Hannan and recognized it within myself as well.
“All this is telling me, Eva Lawrence, is that you are extraordinary,” Hannan said softly.
He was so close to me that I could feel his breath on my lips. I wanted to reach out and kiss him. I wanted our bodies to meld against one another and warm each other. I wanted to disappear into the sensations of him and forget the past and future. I wanted only to live in the present with him.
However, that pain from before stopped me. I pulled away from Hannan and broke the connection. The hurt flashed across his face for the briefest of seconds. Then he turned away from me so I couldn’t see him fully.
“I’m sorry, Hannan,” I said, my voice coming out in a croak.
“It is alright,” Hannan replied, although his voice clearly told me that it wasn’t alright. “You do not feel the same, and I can accept that. I promise I--”
“I didn’t say that,” I interrupted. “I do feel very similarly. About you, I mean.”
Hannan turned back to face me and furrowed his brow. “You do?”
“Yeah,” I answered, and the truth in my words surprised me. “You are the easiest person for me to talk to. You were my first friend in Andsdyer and showed me a kindness that I will never forget.”
“This sounds like something you would say as easily to Heloise or Stella,” Hannan said with a frown. “Another friend.”
“But that’s just it,” I stumbled through the words. “You are my friend, and that’s the best part. Because we are friends, but we’re also attracted to each other.”
Hannan’s lips curled into a mischievous smile. “Then, you will not kiss me because you want to tease me?”
“No, I don’t… damnit.” I put my head in my hands. I slid them down my face, trying to stall and get a grip on the conversation. “Yes, I am attracted to you, but I don’t want to kiss you right now. I’m not in a good headspace. Everything is crazy, and dire, and messed up. I would only be doing it to feel better, and I don’t want to use you like that.”
“You are overthinking it, Eva. I promise, I would not mind being used by you,” Hannan explained as he gestured outward, an offering.
I laughed. I couldn’t help myself. He was so sincere and endearing that I almost jumped him right then and there.
“I hear you, but I wouldn’t feel good about it, you understand?” I put a hand on his chest and played with the loose fabric around his jacket. “If we are going to pursue this, whatever this is, then I want it to be when we’re not in the middle of an adventure that will probably kill us, okay?”
“I thought you were sure this quest was not going to kill you?” Hannan threw my own words back at me.
I rolled my eyes. “Do you understand what I’m saying or not?”
>
“I understand,” Hannan said as he scooted closer to me. “I understand that you want to do this right. So, we will wait until all of this is over, we have saved the day, and life goes back to normal. Where I will take over as Lead Caretaker, and you will be on the king’s council.”
“What?” I burst out laughing. “Is that what you think I want to do?”
“I do not know what you will do!” Hannan threw his hands into the air. “With powers like yours, Eva, the sky is the limit.”
“I don’t know if I could be with all those stuffy nobles all the time,” I said with a disgusted expression as I contemplated the idea. “Maybe I’ll just come work for you in the Menagerie.”
“A splendid idea if I ever heard one,” Hannan said as he moved fully behind me.
Hannan spread his legs, putting one on either side of me and pulled me closer to him, so that my back was against his front. He wrapped his arms around my middle and rested his chin in the crook of my neck.
“Is this alright?” Hannan checked. “I figured you could let someone hold you for a while.”
I sighed contentedly. “I would like that.”
We let the candle burn low. Eventually, we maneuvered to a different position so we could lie next to one another, under one blanket. We stayed intertwined the entire night, and I found that my mind stilled enough to sleep.
Unfortunately, the peaceful rest seemed to only last for a split second. I awoke to the sound on Monte’s voice in my head, paging me down our mental link.
“Eva. Eva! Wake up.”
“Someone better be dead or on fire,” I grumbled back as my entire body tensed.
“Fortunately, it is neither of those things,” the dragon replied. “No, it is something much more urgent.”
“There is nothing other than those two things that are worth waking me up,” I growled at him. I threw an arm over the side of my head, blocking my ear as if that would stop his voice from penetrating my precious sleep.
“I think this will be worth it,” Monte taunted. “I figured out the riddle.”
“What?” I bolted up and, in my shock, spoke the word aloud.
Hannan grunted and shifted next to me. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand and rolled over onto his back.
