by Lori L. Otto
“I was wondering...” she says as two of her friends sidle up behind her. “Can I have your autograph?” The three girls start laughing immediately as Xandra produces a copy of the tabloid magazine that prominently features grainy photos of me in my bikini, sunbathing and playing in the surf with my brother.
I roll my eyes and turn on my heels to walk away.
“I’ve got mine!” Finn says, waving his copy in the air above my head. I snatch it from his grip quickly and run away from him toward the cafeteria. He catches up to me and tries to tug it away.
“I’ll rip it up,” I threaten, pulling hard against the paper. I hated the voyeurism of the paparazzi, but in this instance, it seemed to quell any rumors of a pregnancy.
“No!” he yells. “We had a deal.”
“Yes, we did. The deal was I’d sign it if you never showed it to me again.” I look down at the most prominent picture, where I’d scrawled “Screw you, Finn! Love, Livvy” in permanent marker.
“No, you only asked me to keep it out of your father’s sight. And last I checked, he didn’t go to our school.”
“Well, I never want to see it again, either. And, ewww that you even carry that around.”
“I just did it for novelty... and to prove that you prefer me to all the other jerks we go to school with.”
“In order, it goes Camille, you, Mr. Coleman in there, and then the rest of them. You didn’t need any proof to know that Xandra wasn’t high up on the list.”
“She’s just jealous.”
“She’s just rude,” I correct him as we enter the cafeteria. Camille stands from a table across the room, waving at us. “It was hard enough making friends in my own grade,” I admit to Finn. “To go and skip my sophomore year, that just made more of a target out of me.”
“Cheer up, Livvy,” he says. “Next year at this time, you’ll be at Yale, and this will all be a bad memory.”
We head toward my best friend–his girlfriend–weaving between tables. “Number one, I’m not going to Yale. Obviously, Dad’s talking about it too much with Steven and Kayd, and Kayd’s now made an issue of it with your dad. Number two, it won’t be a bad memory. It won’t be anything I carry with me. Period. If making fun of me makes them feel better about themselves, so be it. Karma’s a bitch. I sleep well knowing that.”
I set my stuff down across from Camille as Finn stands behind her, tousling her hair.
“Stop, Finn!” she squeals. “You’ll mess it up!”
“You look fine,” he mumbles. “So, Liv, why aren’t you going?”
“Going where?” Camille asks me. I shrug my shoulders, trying to replay our conversation.
“Oh. Yale. It’s too far. Columbia’s right here. And plus, I haven’t even been accepted to Yale. It’s a little presumptuous to think–”
“Whatever!” Finn argues. “You’re a shoo-in. You got the second highest SAT score that I know of.”
“I didn’t even tell you my score.”
“Your mom is very proud of you,” he says, signaling for me to join him in the lunch line. “You know there are no secrets in your family.”
“Camille, you want anything?” I ask as I get my wallet out of my purse.
“I’m set, thanks,” she says. “Oh, Finny?” she asks sweetly, grabbing his wrist before he can walk away. “Can you get me a diet soda?”
“Yep.”
We end up in line next to Xandra and her two friends, so I stand behind Finn, putting some distance between myself and this girl who apparently doesn’t like me.
Finn and I compare our schedules for the rest of the afternoon, and I’m relieved to find I have one other class with him after lunch. It’s nice to have someone I trust with me, and Finn and I have always been very comfortable around one another.
When we get back to the table, I check my phone for any messages from Jon. Being back in school is more difficult than I thought it would be. While I take time to send him messages between classes, he hasn’t responded to any of them. I’d hoped he would, having a schedule at Columbia that allowed for more breaks in the day. I feel like I’m going through withdrawal.
“So, Greece,” Camille begins.
“What now?!” I ask her, exasperated. I’d gone over my version of events with her many times.
“Finn says you changed your story? He says you told him everything, and I’m supposed to be your best friend, so I should know if you and Jon did it–”
“Will you shut up!?” I whisper loudly, frantically. “Camille, people would pay good money to hear rumors like that, so please shut up. And that’s all it is. A rumor. As I’ve told you and I told Finn, nothing happened. We went to dinner. We walked on the beach. We sat by a pool. We went to our rooms. We were awoken by my uncle. The end.”
“We were awoken? A-ha! Gotcha!” Finn says, standing up in a triumphant stance.
“Separately, Finn! God, do I have to spell everything out, word for word, for you to understand?”
“So you’re saying you did or didn’t sleep with Jon?” I glare at him across the table, glancing only briefly at Camille, whose eyes are wide and steady on me, waiting for an answer.
“Didn’t.”
“Bullshit.”
“This is pointless. I should have gone home for lunch,” I tell them both, picking at my food.
“Oh, Livvy, I’m just messing with you,” Camille says. “But if I was in Greece with you, Finn, you know what I’d do?”
“No, what?” he asks her, stealing a bite of the apple she’d brought with her. He leans into her closely, and as she lists the things she’d do on her fantasy date in the Mediterranean, my thoughts drift to the one night I’d spent there.
When Jon graduated, my parents gave him a gift to use however he pleased: a round-trip ticket to Europe, with open-ended dates. Of course, my cousin Lexi and her long-time boyfriend, Kyle, got married in England in June, so I was already scheduled to be over there for two weeks. My parents assumed he’d use it to come with us, and were okay with it, provided he stayed with my cousins while I stayed with my immediate family.
My graduation gift to him hinged on whether or not he’d choose to come to Europe while we were there.
Jon decided to fly out a week before the wedding. He backpacked alone, visiting some landmarks in different countries while I helped my cousin prepare for her wedding. He met up with us the day before the ceremony, and I finally was able to give him the gift I’d begged my parents to let me give him.
Before he told me goodnight after the rehearsal dinner, I asked him to come outside of the hotel in which we were staying. We walked around, holding hands and reveling in one another’s company, even though it was misting outside. I handed him the thick envelope and waited for his reaction.
“Whoa, Livvy, what in the world?”
“I promised I’d treat you if you made it into Columbia and got scholarships. I’m not going back on that, and this is the closest we’ll get, geographically... anytime in the near future, anyway.”
“You and I are going to Mykonos?”
“We leave the morning after the wedding and come back the following afternoon.”
“Just the two of us?” he asked in disbelief.
“Ummm... no.”
He smiled wistfully, but continued. “It’s Mykonos, and you’ll be there. It’s all right if your family comes, too. I will not complain one bit–wait, do I have to stay with your dad? Because that might be a little too close for com–”
“Hush,” I interrupted him. “My parents aren’t going. You get your own room. I’m staying with my uncle, Matty. He’s our chaperone.”
“Matty, huh?” he asked. “He’s pretty open-minded.”
“He’s still my dad’s brother, so I have a feeling specific instructions will be given.”
“I know, I’m just kidding,” he laughed. “Or rather, I’m just hopeful. Thank you, Olivia! I can’t believe it! This is... you’re the best, baby.”
“Well, you’re the smartest, and most ambitious,
and most–”
He stopped me with a kiss, holding my head gently in his hands. “Shut up,” he said with a grin. “Kiss me some more before we have to go upstairs.” We stayed outside, embracing, barely breathing, until the mist turned into actual rain. “I don’t want you to risk getting sick.”
“You, either,” I’d told him. “I need to go check on Lex anyway. Although I think she’s been the calmest of all of us.”
He’d walked me up to my room and kissed me one last time, this one much more tender and sensuous. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
The wedding had been perfect, and Jon and I both went to bed at sunset that night so we could get up early for our flight. Matty didn’t plan so well, and seemed a little tired and a lot hung over by the time we boarded the small airplane.
I took the window seat, and Jon peered over my shoulder most of the way, watching the sunrise and the beautiful earth below us. While Matty dozed off, his face covered with a blanket, Jon and I couldn’t contain our excitement.
When the plane landed, there was a car waiting to take us to the hotel I’d picked out. The location I’d chosen had small duplex-style apartments, with two separate living quarters. After a glass of tomato juice, Matty was starting to wake up, and was finally beginning to really see his surroundings.
“So what are you two doing tonight?” he’d asked me and Jon.
“I thought we’d all go out to dinner, and maybe walk around Panarmos Beach. It’s supposed to be pretty and quiet.”
“Oh, I forgot to tell you, Little Liv, I’ve got other plans,” Matty said. “I’d take you to check out the bar scene, but you’re not old enough.”
“Technically, here, we are–wait, you’re going out?” I asked him, surprised.
“Of course! We’re in Greece, honey. There are Gods to be seen.”
Jon and I both chuckled a little. “Well, can we still go to Panarmos? It’s about a half-hour from the hotel. We’d have to take a car.”
“Livvy, I’m going to let you in on a little secret. I am entrusting you to Jon while we’re here. You have my phone number, should you need me, day or night, but I hadn’t planned to really be a chaperone on this trip.”
“But that’s the only reason Dad let you come... you promised you’d chaperone.”
“And don’t you think I’m a better option than Kell–”
“Wait,” Jon interrupted. “You said ‘should you need me, day or night,’ didn’t you?”
“I did.” His smile was mischievous, and made even more devious by the single rising brow.
“What does that mean?” I asked him.
“Little Liv, you sweet, naïve little thing. If you’d like, I’m letting you two stay together tonight, and I can stay in a room by myself. I’ll be out late, but I’ll be there by the time you two get up in the morning. Or afternoon.”
Jon’s grin was huge, but I continued to stare at my uncle, waiting for the punchline. This certainly must have been a joke. While I waited, my stomach began to tie itself in knots, realizing what this could mean for me and Jon.
I didn’t actually believe my uncle until we got to the resort and Matty handed me and Jon two keys to one room, and he took the key to another. “You’ll take good care of my Little Liv?” he’d asked Jon. “She’s my favorite niece.”
“Of course,” he assured him earnestly. “And thank you.”
“I’d appreciate your discretion,” my uncle added. “Let’s have a pact. What happens in Mykonos, stays in Mykonos.”
“Deal!” Jon and I agreed in unison.
Matty hugged me goodbye, whispering in my ear. “Is this what you want? You can stay with me, if you’d like, but–”
“No, thanks,” I assured him softly. “I like this plan.”
“I hope you packed something pretty to wear.” When he pulled back, I could see what he was implying. In the back of my mind, I’d hoped that my uncle would give us some time alone–just as Jon had wished for–but I didn’t expect it to be all night.
I blushed and smiled, simply nodding my head. “She can be taught!” he exclaimed, picking up his bag and going directly to the resort’s bar. “Oh, no drinking!”
“But it’s legal here!” I’d told him, remembering reading that when I was researching our trip.
“No getting drunk!” he amended his earlier directive.
Jon gave my uncle a thumbs up before he picked up our bags. “Shall we find our room?” My heart skipped a beat. Our room.
It took only a few minutes after we got into the small apartment for Jon to start kissing me. It was nice, but I was so nervous I couldn’t relax. We’d decided to explore the city and have dinner on the beach before settling in to our room that evening. We brought a bottle of champagne with us, but we never even opened it. He thought I might need it to calm my nerves, but I wanted to be clear-headed for everything that night, and I wanted to remember everything the next day.
In Mykonos, Jon and I never even talked about whether or not we would have sex. It was what we both wanted, even though I was scared. I knew he would take care of me. I knew he’d go slow.
He’d offered to let me shower first after dinner. I stood under the hot water, trying to give myself a pep talk. My stomach was still jittery, and I just wanted to settle down. I took a few deep breaths and closed my eyes, inhaling the scent of lavender from the shower gel the hotel provided. It began to soothe me.
I wasn’t sure I’d heard it the first time, but the second time Jon knocked on the door, I hesitated only a second before answering him. I’d intentionally left the door unlocked, just in case.
“Come in,” I said over the sound of the water. He opened the door, and although I couldn’t see him, I heard the uncertainty in his voice.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
The glass shower door was fogged up from the heat, so we couldn’t see one another until he finally opened the door. I put my arms across my chest and turned away from him, feeling suddenly modest and completely exposed. He’d never seen me fully naked before; I’d never seen him–or any man–before.
He stepped under the stream of water behind me. I kept waiting to feel his hands on my body, but he spoke before he ever touched me.
“Olivia,” he started softly, “please look at me.” Slowly, I turned around to face him, the water dripping into my eyes. He took a step back and pulled one of my arms gently away from my chest. I thought he was trying to see my body, but he was actually trying to move me out from under the direct stream of water.
“Thanks,” I said to him. He lifted his hands and pushed my hair off of my forehead so I could see him better. I kept my eyes on his, scared to look elsewhere. He moved his hands to the back of my neck and leaned in to kiss me.
Tentative, I put my hands on his hips, but as our kisses became more needy, I held his head to mine, too. I broke away, in need of some air. He started kneading my shoulders, watching me as I caught my breath. His eyes moved from mine and began to travel down my body. I watched his expression, hoping he liked what he saw. By the time he looked back up at me, I realized I’d been holding my breath, and still couldn’t breathe normally.
“You can look, too,” he’d suggested, and my whole body turned bright red. I could feel the rush of heat. As I surveyed him, my hands traced over his chest and the abdominal muscles I’d already been acquainted with. I was surprised to see what was just a few inches beneath them. “Don’t be scared.”
I looked back up at him quickly. “I’m not.” I smiled at him, and we both kept our eyes open this time as we kissed. Mine closed when he stepped toward me, and I could feel his whole body pressed up against mine.
His hands explored my backside slowly. I stood relatively still, my fingernails digging into his back as if I was holding on for dear life. He pulled away with purpose, and waited for me to open my eyes. “You are beautiful, Olivia.”
I released my tight grip and moved my hands to his face, my thumbs play
ing with his earlobes. “So are you.” His lips met mine once more and we kissed for a few minutes before deciding to actually get cleaned up. Hands explored bodies in ways they never had as we made sure every inch had been covered in the shower gel. We took turns washing the suds away.
He got out first, wrapping himself in a towel before handing me one. I asked for a few minutes of privacy while I got ready.
I’d thought about wearing the bustier that I bought for prom night, the night we had first planned on being together, but it felt far too sexy and daring for the way I was feeling. I was glad I had brought an alternative.
I brushed my long, wet hair after towel-drying it as best as I could. After putting on the satin slip with lace trim, I wished it was a few inches longer. The yellow fabric looked nice against my tanned skin, and I was happy with the color choice I’d made. When I thought about Jon, waiting in the next room, a smile formed across my lips with no effort. I suddenly had no anxiety or apprehension, and I walked out of the bathroom, excited and exuberant.
Jon had pulled back the blankets and was sitting with his back against the padded headboard. He had on dark grey boxers. His short hair was wet and messy. He looked sexier than I’d ever seen him before.
As I sat next to him on the bed, my legs stretched in front of me, my phone rang. It was late–too late for someone to be calling without a good reason. Jon picked up my phone.
“Donna,” he said.
“I wonder what she wants at this time–oh, it’s still early in New York,” I said, silencing the phone and motioning for Jon to put it back on the nightstand. “I’m sure she just wanted to find out how the wedding went last night.”
He nodded and smiled, dragging a few of his fingers up my thigh before stopping at the light green lace trim on the bottom hem.
“You look like happiness,” he’d said. “Like sunshine. You should wear that color more often.”
“You like it?” I asked coyly.
“I love it.” He put his fingers under my chin and turned my head to face him. “Thank you.” His gaze was intense and sincere, his smile subtle but still reaching his eyes. It was the first of many times he would thank me that night.
