by Katie Knight
“You thought love was enough? As in past tense? So you don’t think it’s enough anymore?”
She shrugged. “When that relationship blew up in my face, it just reinforced the idea that my mom had been right all those years. That I should look for someone who checks all the boxes because merely having a connection with someone—no matter how strong—is not enough.”
“It’s not enough for what?” he asked.
“It’s not enough to build a stable foundation. My mom was crazy about my dad, but he left when she was pregnant with me. Then she found someone else, and they were supposed to get married when I was around six, but he ditched us too. Right before the wedding.”
“Oh wow, Tyler never mentioned any of that,” he said. “I knew your dad wasn’t in the picture, but I didn’t realize you guys had been abandoned. Twice.”
Suddenly, it all made sense. Jake had found Hanna’s checklist arbitrary and even somewhat silly, but now he understood why she’d devised it in the first place. She’d created those rules to protect herself because she didn’t want to get abandoned again. She wanted to give her children something she’d never had growing up: a loving and devoted father. And to her, that meant prioritizing attributes like reliability and loyalty over chemistry. Jake could understand why she felt the way she did, but he didn’t think she had to sacrifice a connection with someone just so she could find a stable father for her children. Surely a woman as smart, sexy, and beautiful as she was could have it all.
“Tell me about your family,” Hanna said. “What’s your mom like?”
“My mom’s an amazing woman,” Jake said. “I don’t know if she was a very good wife, though. Things were sometimes a little tense between her and my father, but she made it a point to always put us first. From the outside, I’m sure it looked like we had the perfect family. And Mom certainly made me and Julie feel like we did.”
“And your dad?”
“My dad struggled with alcoholism for years.” Jake sighed. Hanna had revealed a lot of personal stuff, and he wanted to reciprocate, but he honestly wasn’t in the mood to delve into the nature of the relationship he’d had with his father. “I think he was hard on me because he wanted me to be better than him, but he went about it in the wrong way. It’s as if I was never good enough for him. I could never measure up. I never got his approval. I don’t think I ever heard him say he was proud of me.”
“That’s really hard,” Hanna said. “I’m sorry you had to deal with all that. Honestly, when my clients tell me about their strained relationships with their fathers, I can’t help but wonder if I was better off never knowing my own.”
“If he was the kind of person to walk out on his responsibilities, then you probably were better off without him,” Jake said. “I think having no father will mess you up less than having a bad one.” He pulled her closer and held her tighter. “Fortunately, our baby will have two loving parents from day one.”
Hanna sighed in contentment and squeezed his arm. Jake kissed her neck and then her shoulder. She rolled over so he could kiss her on the lips. It was getting harder and harder to resist her.
When he was with her, it was as if he didn’t care what tomorrow would bring. All he cared about was making the most of the moments they had. Maybe that was the beauty of military relationships. Of any relationship that forced you apart for significant periods of time. Maybe that’s what Hunter had been trying to convince him of. When you have a limited amount of time together, every moment is precious.
Jake didn’t know what might happen over the next twenty-four hours, to say nothing of the next eight months. But he did know he wanted Hanna right here and now, and that was enough for him.
Chapter Seventeen
Hanna woke up the next morning in a blissful state. The cottage had provided just the escape they’d needed to connect on a deeper level, away from all the chaos of the prior days’ events. Although she knew her life was still in danger—and undoubtedly would be until everything had been resolved—she felt safe with Jake. It was as if she knew with one hundred percent certainty that he wouldn’t let anything bad happen to her or their baby.
He had taken the news of the pregnancy surprisingly well and adapted to the situation almost immediately. Hanna’s heart warmed at the thought. Regardless of what happened between them, they were going to have a baby together, and he seemed committed to being in that baby’s life. Considering the childhood she’d had, that was all she could hope for.
Hanna sprawled out in the empty bed, stretching and yawning. She wasn’t sure where Jake was, but judging from the faint music coming from the other side of the door, she could guess. He really was regimented about his workout sessions. She wondered how that was going to change once the baby came. She knew staying on any kind of schedule with a newborn was virtually impossible. At least for the first few months.
Hanna grabbed her phone off the nightstand to check her emails but then remembered she shouldn’t be contacting anyone—not when her phone might give away her location. Any work messages would have to wait.
She noticed that she had a notification alerting her of several new messages on the dating app she’d been using for a few months. She realized she didn’t care what any of them said. It didn’t matter who they were from. There was no else she’d rather be building a relationship with than Jake.
She opened the app and navigated to the settings without even reading the messages. Pausing for a moment, she wondered if she should actually disable her account. She certainly didn’t want to jinx things with her and Jake. Then she rationalized that she ought to be all in. If they were ever going to build anything sustainable, she had to give it her all. Plus, she could always enable the account again if things went south. She tapped the selection box to disable the account. After the night they’d had, she was hopeful about the direction they were taking. As hot as the sex had been, it was the way they had connected emotionally that left her totally optimistic—and committed to giving them a serious try. She only hoped he was, too.
Hanna put her phone back on the nightstand and climbed out of bed. She headed to the bathroom to wash up—and slip on her bathing suit under her clothes so she maybe could surprise Jake with an early morning swim—before walking out into the living room. Sure enough, he was in there working out. He had pushed the coffee table to one side of the room and had hooked up two strap things with handles to the doorway leading into the kitchen. They extended to the center of the living room, where he stood using them to perform some kind of resistance exercises.
He smiled when he saw her. After finishing the set, he let the straps go and turned down the music.
“How’d you sleep?” he asked.
“Great,” she said. “Though clearly I’m not as well rested as you. I don’t jump out of bed with the urge to work out every morning.”
Jake laughed. “Trust me,” he said. “If you worked out every day, it would get to the point where you felt off on the days you didn’t get any exercise. It’s truly addicting.”
Hanna made a big show of stretching and yawning as she sat on the couch. “If you say so. Me, I prefer coffee and donuts in the morning.”
“You could join me, you know.” Then he winked at her. “We could get sweaty together.”
She groaned. “I hate working out. Believe me, I’ve tried everything.”
“You’ve never worked out with me,” he pointed out. “Plus it would be good for our baby. At least some gentle stretching. It will keep you limber as your belly grows.”
“That’s true,” Hanna said. She honestly wouldn’t have even considered working out, but since the baby was, after all, half Jake’s, she decided she owed it to him. She was also intrigued at his mention of getting sweaty together. Surely, it was a double entendre. “All right, I’ll work out with you. But you have to go easy on me.”
Jake made an X across his chest with one hand. “Cross my heart,” he said. “Come here.”
Hanna joined him in the mid
dle of the room, and he started by showing her some stretches.
“Are we going to use those strap things?” she asked.
“Not yet,” he said. “Let’s get you warmed up first.”
They sat on the rug together and he taught her a few moves. They would hold one position for fifteen seconds or so before switching to another one. Hanna had to admit, the stretches felt good. She could feel her muscles warming up as they made their way through a complete rotation, then repeated the cycle twice more.
When they had finished the sitting stretches, Jake helped her up.
“Now the fun begins,” he said with a devilish grin.
“Hey now,” Hanna said. “You promised to go easy on me.”
“Relax. I am. Was the stretching so bad?”
She shook her head. “The stretching was good, but that’s about the extent of my physical activity on any given day. And usually, if I am going to work out, it’s through more leisurely activities. Like swimming. Or strolling along the beach. Or having sex.”
Jake laughed. “Don’t try to change the subject. You’re not going to distract me midworkout.”
“Oh no?” Hanna asked. “Not even if I do this?” She bent over and touched her toes, making sure to stick her butt out playfully. She did a little wiggle before standing back up again.
“As tempting as that is,” he said, “I never cut a workout short.”
She sighed. It was going to be harder to crack him than she thought. But she was not one to back down from a challenge.
“Let’s get on with these standing exercises, then,” she said. She didn’t necessarily want to keep exercising, but she decided she could put up with it if it meant Jake putting his hands all over her.
“All right, we’re going to start with our quads,” he said. He stood behind her and put his hands on her hips. Then he gently guided her body in such a way that she could feel the stretch in the back of her thighs. “Can you feel that?” he asked.
She nodded, and he pushed her a little deeper into the position.
“It shouldn’t hurt,” he said, “but you should definitely feel it in your legs. Hold it for twenty seconds.”
Jake left his strong hands on her hips as she counted, and longing welled up inside her. She wanted to feel his hands all over her body. When twenty seconds had passed, she stood and turned around so that she was facing him.
“What are you doing?” he asked. “We’re not finished.”
“No,” she said. Then she stood on her toes and kissed him. “We’re just getting started.”
Jake wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer. As they kissed passionately, she could feel his member growing hard between them, until it was pressing against her stomach. She loved knowing that he wanted her just as badly as she wanted him. He may have been a lot more disciplined than she was—and therefore better at controlling his urges—but when he did give in to them, he held nothing back.
“We—shouldn’t—” Jake said between kisses. “We—have—stuff—to—do.”
But Hanna didn’t care. Her fingers slid under the waistband of his shorts. Before she could pull them down, though, he reached down and grabbed her hands, stopping her.
“We really shouldn’t,” he said again as he tried to catch his breath. “We need to prioritize your safety.”
“But this is a safe house,” she said. “Literally.”
Jake took a step back, though he was still holding her hands in his. It was as if he didn’t trust her enough to let them go. Or maybe he didn’t trust himself enough to stop her if her fingers slid under his waistband again.
“You have no idea how badly I want to take you right here,” he said. “But we need to get you some breakfast first.”
Hanna knew he wasn’t wrong, but she didn’t see why they couldn’t finish what they had started first. So she leaned forward to continue their kiss. Before their lips connected, though, her empty stomach betrayed her. It let out a low growl, and Jake laughed.
“Come on,” he said, finally letting go of her hands. “I know they stocked the fridge with some staples before we got here. Let’s see what I can fix for us.”
“You’re going to cook for us?” she asked as she followed him into the kitchen.
“Of course. No child of mine will be raised on cocoa puffs and ice cream.”
“I didn’t realize you were much of a chef.”
“I’m a man of many talents,” he said as he opened the tiny fridge that looked as though it was from the 1950s. Hanna sat at the table and watched. “Let’s see. What are you in the mood for?”
“Depends,” she said. “What are you offering?”
“Looks like we’ve got the ingredients for omelets.” He closed the fridge. “If there’s flour in the cabinets, pancakes are an option, too.”
“How about omelets?”
“Let me guess: complete with greasy hash browns, sausage, and bacon? And ice cream for dessert?”
She nodded. “Naturally. I always have dessert after breakfast.”
Jake laughed. Hanna didn’t mind that he teased her about her sweet tooth. Indeed, she had been wondering what kind of cravings she was going to have over the course of the pregnancy. Would she like the same things, or would her tastes change? She’d never been a fan of pickles, for example, or any salty snacks like potato chips for that matter. It had always been candy and chocolate and cupcakes.
“So are you planning on gaining any sympathy weight?” she asked as he started taking out the ingredients for the omelets.
“Sympathy weight?”
“You know. When a couple is having a baby, the man will eat whatever the woman is craving. So he ends up gaining weight, too.”
Jake shook his head. “I will most definitely not be gaining any sympathy weight.”
Hanna laughed. “We’ll see about that.” In the past few days alone, she had learned a few tricks for getting Jake to loosen up and break his routine. She had no doubt that over the rest of the pregnancy, she would learn a few more.
Chapter Eighteen
“So how did you learn to cook?” Hanna asked as she watched him open the cabinets, looking for various utensils.
“My mom always encouraged us to help in the kitchen,” Jake said. “She wanted us to be self-sufficient at a young age. I think it’s because my dad’s mom coddled him. He was the baby of the family, and he didn’t know how to cook or do laundry or anything when they first got married.”
Jake found a small glass bowl and took out six eggs. He cracked the first one and held it over his hand, careful to catch the yolk as the white part dripped into the bowl.
“What are you doing?” Hanna asked, getting up and walking over as if to supervise. “The yolk is the best part!”
Jake looked at her, eyebrows raised. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a whole-egg omelet. “I promise you won’t even notice the missing yolks,” he said, dropping the golden orb into the sink and starting on the next egg.
“I promise I will.” She held her hand over the bowl to stop him from cracking—and apparently, in her mind, mutilating—another egg. “When was the last time you had a real omelet anyway?”
“If by real omelet, you mean with the yolks, it’s been a few years.”
“Wow. Okay.” She took the egg out of his hand and cracked it over the bowl, letting the yolk and all fall in. “We’ll compromise. Six eggs, five yolks.”
Jake laughed. “That’s hardly a compromise. Maybe three yolks would be a compromise.”
Hanna looked at him, her face stern. “The baby wants yolks,” she said. “Are you going to deprive the baby?”
Jake sighed as he handed her the third egg. “That’s only going to work a few times, you know,” he said. “You’re going to have to come up with something else if you want me to keep breaking my routine.”
Hanna cracked the third egg into the bowl with a flourish and reached for the fourth.
“We’re going to need cheese, too,”
she said as she dropped the fourth egg—but third yolk—into the bowl.
Jake rolled his eyes. “Of course we are.”
“And sausage!”
Hanna finished adding all the eggs to the bowl as Jake dug around in the refrigerator.
“Looks like my buddies know me well,” he said, pulling out two packages. “We’ve got turkey sausage and part skim mozzarella.”
Hanna sighed in mock frustration as she stirred the whites and yolks vigorously with a fork. “I guess those will have to do for now. But I’m going out for full-fat provisions this afternoon.”
“Oh God,” Jake said. “That’s how we’re going to die, isn’t it? Not from the men coming after us, but because we’re each going to have a heart attack before we get the chance to leave.”
Hanna reached for the mozzarella. “I don’t know why you’re complaining so much,” she said. “Your body needs fat to stay healthy.”
“While that is true,” Jake said, pulling out a tightly wrapped package of ground sausage and putting it on the counter, “I think you’ll find the average American eats way more fat than necessary.”
“But am I average?” Hanna asked as she dropped a heaping handful of cheese into the bowl with the eggs.
Jake stepped behind her and kissed her neck, ever so softly. “No,” he murmured. “You are definitely not average.”
It took all the willpower he had not to wrap his arms around her waist and bury his lips into the ridge of her collarbone. How she could look so stunning, so tempting standing in the kitchen making breakfast, he had no idea. But he wanted to finish what they had started. After breakfast, he told himself. He knew she—and the baby—had to eat.
“Can you get a skillet going?” Hanna asked as she added some cheese to the bowl of eggs.
Jake found a large frying pan in one of the cabinets and set it atop the burner. After turning on the stove, he reached for the package of turkey sausage and opened it.
“We should brown some sausage before putting it in the eggs,” he said. He dumped some in the pan, and it sizzled, filling the tiny kitchen with a mouthwatering aroma. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had sausage or bacon.
