Flashback

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Flashback Page 7

by Jill Shalvis


  “Aidan—”

  His hand stroked over her hip, and her breath backed up into her throat. She opened her mouth to say maybe she’d been hasty about this whole breaking his heart thing, but before she could, he’d put a hand on her inner thigh and pushed, further opening her to him.

  The slants of shadows hampered his view, but he didn’t seem bothered, not with his front row seat.

  The only sound in the room came from him as he let out a groan. “God, Kenzie. You’re so pretty.” He lowered his head, then paused, his mouth a hairsbreadth away from her trembling belly. “I want to kiss. I want to taste. I want that more than I want my next breath. Please let me…”

  As far as begging went, it was pretty good. “O-okay,” she managed, and almost before the word was out, he’d nudged her legs open even wider, wedging them there with his broad shoulders. He slowly lowered his head. “Pretty please,” he whispered across her flesh.

  Her wet flesh.

  “Yes.” Her heels dug into the mattress as he “pretty pleased” his tongue over her, and then his teeth, and then his warm lips, over and over again leaving her a panting, gasping, quivery mass of sensitized nerve endings, and when she exploded for him, he surged up, produced a condom and slid into her with one sure, powerful thrust.

  “Oh,” she gasped, reaching up to hold onto him because her world had just spun on its axis. The feel of him deep inside her—and he was deep, as deep as he could get—had her spiraling. Gone were all thoughts of hurting him, or revenge. She could think of nothing but this, but him. Not that she would admit such a thing. “You…you didn’t beg for that.”

  Cupping her face, he tilted it up to his. “Pretty-please may I drive you out of your living mind?”

  Oh, God.

  “Kenzie? May I?” His voice was thick with the same hunger and need that was driving her.

  “Yes.”

  “Good. May I also pretty-please make you scream my name?”

  In answer, she arched up, her breasts pressing into his hard, warm chest, her legs wrapping around his waist.

  He groaned, a low, rough sound that scraped at all her good spots but he didn’t move. “Can I?”

  “I don’t usually do much screaming.”

  He just smiled, and then took her mouth as he took her body, indeed driving her out of her mind with all too disturbing ease, and when she exploded again, she cried out his name.

  Loudly.

  She might have even screamed it.

  As the blood finally slowed in her veins, as the roar of it lowered to a trickle in her head, she became aware of the fact that she was gripping him tight, holding him close with her arms and her legs, not letting him escape.

  He didn’t say a word, just nuzzled lazily at her neck as his breathing slowed.

  Hers wasn’t slowing. Embarrassed at how tightly she was holding him, she forced herself to let him go, certain he’d roll away.

  But in perhaps the loveliest thing he’d done all night, he didn’t. Instead, he remained right where he was, turning just his head to press his lips to her jaw, murmuring her name on a sigh.

  It was one of those defining moments, where she suddenly knew the truth—she’d not exacted a single ounce of revenge. In fact, she’d made things worse.

  She’d risked her own heart.

  But for that one moment at least, she didn’t care, because maybe he’d changed. Maybe things could be different this time, and—

  “You screamed my name.” He lifted his head, revealing a strong smile. “You begged.” He out-and-out grinned then, not broken, not even a little bit. “We still work hard.”

  “There’s no we.” She pushed him off her, suddenly and irrationally irritated. “No we at all.”

  Completely oblivious to the picture he made sprawled out on the bed, buck naked, he put his hands behind his head and continued to smile like an idiot. “Are you telling me you have no desire to do that again?”

  “None.”

  “Ah, Kenzie. You’re such a pretty liar.”

  Yeah. Yeah, she was. A pretty liar, and a good liar. But she had no idea how else to hide the fact that she still had feelings for him in spite of their past—or maybe because of it. God. She needed to get out for a while, needed to clear her head. Get some answers. Alone.

  “Stay,” he murmured.

  “Okay.” She looked at him. “I’ll stay if you tell me this. Why did you really dump me?”

  At that, his amusement faded. “I told you I was an idiot back then.”

  “Granted. Why else?”

  He looked at her and she nearly backed down; she certainly held her breath, but he touched her face. “Because I didn’t know what I had.”

  AIDAN SLEPT like the dead. Or like a man who’d been far too close to serious exhaustion. When he opened his eyes, he felt the various aches and pains from the fire, and from the mattress gymnastics he and Kenzie had executed, and was grateful to know he had two days off, because more sleep was on his To Do list. Much more.

  So was more mattress gymnastics.

  Considering that Kenzie was wrapped around him like a pretzel, that shouldn’t be too difficult to manage. As he looked into her face, taking in each of the cuts and the bruises there in the light of day, he felt a tug in his belly.

  He wished like hell he could say he was just hungry, but he knew the truth.

  He was a goner.

  She was as cut up and bruised as he was, more so, and if he hurt like hell, he could only imagine how she felt. He was used to such injuries. She wasn’t.

  “I realize I’ve spent my days on a television set, where my worst injury was a paper cut from that day’s script,” she whispered, eyes still closed. “But I’m not feeling as bad as I probably look.”

  Her face was relaxed now; and he realized it hadn’t been before—not on Blake’s boat, not when she’d crawled in bed with him, not even when he’d stripped her out of his shirt and proceeded to make her scream.

  That he’d undone her so easily didn’t stroke his ego. She’d undone him just the same. It’d always been like that for them, a virtual explosion of need and lust and hunger.

  But he’d attributed much of that to being young and horny. He hadn’t anticipated a resurgence of those feelings, And he doubted she had either. But that’s exactly what they’d gotten.

  With a sigh, she slid out of his arms and off the bed. He enjoyed the view as she walked to the bathroom, but when she shut the door, his smile faded. She needed sustenance, and a bandage change. Getting up, he pulled on his jeans and went into the kitchen, where he grabbed a pan and eggs and went to work getting them both some protein so that they could go back to bed and burn it all off again.

  His doorbell rang and Aidan stopped dicing peppers long enough to sign the clipboard of a pudgy guy in brown shorts, who handed him a slim package.

  When he heard the shower go off, he finished the eggs and then grabbed his first-aid bag and knocked on the door. “Bandages, aspirin and breakfast. And your package from L.A. is here.”

  “Perfect timing—I’ve got to run.”

  “You mean back to Los Angeles?”

  The door opened and steam came out. As did Kenzie wrapped in another of his towels. “Not back. Not yet.”

  The towel was tucked between her breasts, which pushed them up and nearly out, a fact he’d have taken the time to thoroughly enjoy except for the nasty bruise arcing along her left collar bone. “You need rest.”

  “I need clothes.” She moved past him and into his bedroom. “Can I borrow a pair of sweats?”

  “Sure.” He opened his dresser and handed the clothes over.

  “Thanks. I’ve really got to go.”

  She was going to go snoop. Get in Tommy’s way. Get herself arrested. “Kenzie, listen to me. You need to stay out of the investigation. The chief doesn’t want you digging—”

  “I don’t work for him. He can’t tell me what to do.”

  “If you stay—”

  “No. Thank you
, but, no.”

  Usually in the light of day, with a woman in his bedroom, he was the one who had to go. Usually.

  Okay, always.

  It felt odd to have the shoe on the other foot. Especially given the magnitude of what they’d shared last night, and he wasn’t alone in feeling it, dammit. He knew he wasn’t.

  But Kenzie moved carefully away from him, slowly, as if still in pain, but with conviction. She was set on going, leaving him with a disconcerted feeling in his gut.

  Was this how he’d made women feel? Like they’d already been forgotten? “Let’s change your bandages—”

  “I can do it on my own.”

  Seemed she was used to doing stuff on her own. That was new.

  So was his unsettledness over the way this was going down.

  “Yeah,” she said at his quiet surprise. “I’m not the same helpless little thing I used to be.”

  “I never thought you were helpless.”

  “Well, I was. But I’ve grown up. I’ve changed. In many ways. And I don’t need anyone’s help. For anything.”

  He arched an eyebrow. “You needed me when we—”

  “No. Well, yes, yes, I needed you to save me from the fire, but—”

  “That’s not what I was talking about.” He pointed to his bed.

  “Oh, no. That was just me, breaking your heart. I warned you, remember.”

  Bullshit. That hadn’t been just revenge. “Kenzie.”

  “Sorry. Got to go. Have to go.” Once again she dropped her towel, which had the same magical effect on him as it had last night. While he stood there taking in the glorious sight of her naked body, she pulled on the sweats, kissed him on the cheek, then walked out of the room.

  And, given the sound of the front door opening and then closing, out of his house.

  And, most likely, out of his life.

  Fitting justice really, as he’d once done the same to her. Moving to the living room, he looked out the window in time to catch her taillights as they vanished down his driveway.

  I’ve changed, she’d said, and she had.

  But as the blood once again began a northward flow from behind the zipper of his pants back up to his brain, another thought managed to get his attention.

  He’d changed as well. And he was going to prove it.

  8

  SOMEONE WAS KNOCKING on Aidan’s door when he turned off the shower. She’d come back. With his pulse kicking, he grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist, heading for the door at a speed far faster than his usual get-there-when-I-get-there saunter.

  Only it wasn’t Kenzie at all. “Dammit.”

  His best friend and partner Zach just looked at him. “Nice to see you, too.” Without waiting for an invitation, he pushed past Aidan and walked in.

  Fair enough. Aidan had let himself into Zach’s house plenty of times. Aidan shut the door behind Zach and shoved his fingers through his wet hair. “Sorry. Thought you were someone else.”

  Zach took in Aidan standing there dripping wet, wearing only a towel. “Clearly. Who is she?”

  “How do you know it’s a she?”

  “Because if you’re meeting a guy dressed like that, we have a whole different issue to talk about.”

  Aidan rolled his eyes and left Zach to go get some clothes. In his bedroom, he looked at his bed as he pulled on a clean shirt. The covers were tossed half on the floor, and on his nightstand were two empty condom wrappers.

  And though it was crazy given that Kenzie had used his shampoo, his clothes and his soap, he’d have sworn he could smell her scent, some complicated mix of soft, determined, sexy woman. He stared at the bed, remembering how he’d felt when she’d crawled in with him, remembering how natural it’d been to kiss and touch her, to sink into her body and go to a place he hadn’t been in a long time.

  Then they’d slept together, and that had felt good, too, being all tangled up in each other again. Familiar, but new. Even better, if that was possible. Things hadn’t been complicated in the dark.

  Things had been amazing.

  But she’d left.

  When he walked back into the kitchen, he found Zach staring at the breakfast he’d made for Kenzie.

  “You made breakfast,” Zach said. “As in got out a pan and cooked something.”

  “Yeah. So?”

  “You put out napkins.”

  “Let me repeat myself. So?”

  “So you never put out napkins. Not when it’s me or the other guys.”

  “Do you want to split the food with me or not?”

  “You didn’t cook this for me.”

  “You’re right.”

  Zach raised an eyebrow.

  “You’re going to question a plate of food?” Aidan said. “Really?”

  Zach didn’t have to be asked twice. He grabbed a plate and pulled up a chair.

  “I thought you and Brooke were going away for a few days since you haven’t been cleared to go back to work yet.”

  “We are. We’re leaving tomorrow morning. Wanted to see you first.”

  “Ah, that’s so sweet. You’re going to miss me.”

  “Actually, I’m not.” Zach shoveled in some food, and looked at him. “I heard about the explosion. I should have been there.”

  Aidan looked at the cast on Zach’s left wrist, remembered how close he’d come to losing him along with Blake, and felt the food get caught in his throat. “You’re not healed yet.”

  “It’s coming along though.” He squeezed his fingers into a fist, then stretched them straight out. “I could be back at work, dammit. I have no idea why the chief’s being so hard-assed about this. I’m willing and able.”

  “Enjoy your few days off. You and Brooke deserve it.”

  “Yeah.” Zach sighed. “So is the boat a complete loss?”

  “Unfortunately.”

  “Kenzie all right?”

  “Heard about that, too, huh?”

  “Yeah.” Zach paused. “Was it awkward, considering your past with her?”

  “To be the one rescuing her?”

  “What else?”

  Yeah, genius, what else. Maybe sleeping with her…But that hadn’t been awkward. Not one little bit.

  Zach was looking at him. “What am I missing?”

  Aidan shook his head. “Nothing.”

  “Come on.”

  “Okay, nothing I want to talk about.”

  “That I buy,” Zach said, and like the good friend he was, changed the subject. “I heard that Blake must have kept his accelerants on the boat, which is why it blew like it did.”

  That was one theory, Aidan was sure.

  But he had another. “Well…”

  “What?” Zach asked.

  “You’re going to tell me I’m crazy.”

  Zach stood up and went to the refrigerator for the milk. “All those times I thought those fires were arson, you were the only one who believed me. I’ll be the last one to tell you that you’re crazy.”

  “Yeah, but now we know that Tommy was behind you the entire time, he was just in the middle of his investigation. Still is, with the chief riding his ass to put an end to this.”

  “Yeah.” Zach pushed away his plate. “So I wonder what they’d say now.”

  “About…?”

  “About your not buying that boat fire was any more accidental than the other fires. Or me not buying it, either.”

  Aidan looked into his best friend’s eyes and let out a breath. “That boat was blown up for a reason and I think that reason was to hide something. Something that someone didn’t want found.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t know. And I’m betting Tommy and the Chief don’t know either but they want to.”

  “It doesn’t make sense,” Zach said. “Blake’s dead.”

  Aidan pushed away his plate. “Yeah.” Goddamn, but he wasn’t going to get used to that any time soon, the fact that Blake, a friend, one of them for Christ’s sake, was not only gone, but accused of ars
on.

  “Which means that he wasn’t working alone and whoever the other person is, they’re running scared of something.”

  “Or someone,” Zach said. “Kenzie shows up out of the blue after what, six years? Seems kind of odd, doesn’t it?”

  Aidan’s gut tightened. “Her brother’s dead, Zach.”

  “Yes. Her arsonist brother. They were close, right?”

  “What are you saying, that she’s his co-felon?”

  “Look, I don’t want to think about Blake doing the things they’ve accused him of, either. And I really don’t want to think about the fact that if he was still alive, he’d be in jail. But those are the facts.”

  Aidan scrubbed his hands over his face. “She just got into town.”

  “You know that for sure?”

  Actually, no, he didn’t.

  “Why was she on his boat?”

  “Going through his things.” Listen to him defend her. “Missing him.”

  Zach closed his eyes and rubbed them hard. “If that were true, wouldn’t she have come sooner?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t know anything except that Blake was all she had.” Aidan got to his feet because he had to move, had to pace the length of the kitchen. “She’s…devastated. Horrified. And pissed off that we all believe that Blake’s guilty. I think she’s going to go digging on her own and find out what she can.”

  “Which should make Tommy oh-so-happy.”

  “He’s going to have her arrested if she hinders the investigation,” Aidan admitted. “And she’s going to hinder. It’s in her nature. She intends to prove Blake innocent.”

  Zach raised a brow. “You got all that from pulling her out of the water?”

  Well, shit. Aidan picked up his fork and shoveled some food in.

  “You saw her after the fire. At the hospital.”

  “Yeah.”

  Zach paused. “And after that as well, I’m thinking.”

  “Yeah.”

  Zach peered around Aidan and into the living room, pointedly looking down the hallway.

  “She’s not still here.”

  “But she was here? Jesus, Aidan. What would Tommy say?”

  “Since when does that matter?”

 

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