by T Gephart
My body sagged in relief, my eyes filling with tears as voices echoed around me. I couldn’t hear properly, another gunshot piercing the commotion as my vision faded in and out. It wasn’t until I saw Lewis fall to the ground that I knew it hadn’t been aimed at me.
I needed to sleep, the fatigue overwhelming as I heard my name shouted again and again, turning me over onto my back.
Hands.
Hands ran over my face as I tried to focus, wiping away tears I didn’t realize had fallen as the voice begged me to stay awake. I wasn’t sure I could to be honest, wanting to just close my eyes for a minute or two and catch my breath.
“Hayden.” The voice was more insistent, shaking me a little. “Don’t you dare close your eyes. You stay with me, okay? Stay with me.”
It was Mack.
His hands, his voice, his demands—somehow in the room with me. And I didn’t know if I was hallucinating, if he was really there, or I’d already died. I didn’t care, using the last of my strength to reach up and touch his hands and whisper that I loved him, that I didn’t mean what I said, and that I knew he’d never hurt me.
He said something I couldn’t make out, coldness flooding my body, and my eyes closing, even though I didn’t want them to.
I was glad I’d gotten one last chance.
Even if it was only to say goodbye.
Mack
“MACK, SHE IS in shock. You need to let us work.” Maree pushed me away, covering Hayden’s body with thermal foil blankets while sliding on an oxygen mask. Taylor, the other EMT had pressure on her chest, the blood from the wound pouring out of her way too fast.
It was dumb luck Lewis was such a terrible shot, the range at which he’d fired would’ve been deadly if he’d aimed more center and lower. Still, I wasn’t feeling gratitude as I watched Hayden’s eyes slide shut, her pupils flat and dilated, ready to kill Lewis with my bare hands if he hadn’t already been shot.
Tibbs had done some digging and found out Lewis was in deep to the tune of fifty Gs. It’s what he’d wanted to tell Presley before we’d gotten called out, the mystery of why he’d broken into her apartment, solved. We couldn’t be sure, but assumed he’d been looking for money, hoping some cash would appease the loan sharks. Pity that wasn’t how it worked, which is why he was getting increasingly desperate and showed up at the club. What he’d intended to do, we had no idea.
What Tibbs hadn’t found out—the police filling us in as they hauled him away—was Lewis Goodman, AKA DJ Lewis G, was actually Lewis Wright, brother to Cooper Wright, Hayden’s ex-husband. He’d changed his name after a falling out with the family and had been estranged from what they could tell, but the Lewis who had been dating Presley had been the same Lewis, Hayden had once called brother-in-law.
“Her pulse is stabilizing. We need to move her,” Maree shouted, Taylor helping roll her onto a stretcher while I stood by and watched. I didn’t even realize arms had been holding me back, Tibbs on one side and Leighton on the other.
“I’m going.” I moved forward the four-hundred pounds holding me back not strong enough to stop me. “Move your arms or I’ll rip them from their sockets.”
“You’re no good to her if you’re getting in the way.” North pushed me in the chest, nodding to the other two as the medic unit took Hayden out. “I’ll take you to the hospital, but you’re riding with me.”
Seeing that piece of shit grab Hayden and drag her away on the security footage, had spiked my anger to a level I’d never experienced. And there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that when I found him, I was going to kill him. Didn’t care what the consequences were or why he’d put hands on her in the first place. All I knew was we had to find them, like yesterday.
That film made it clear her message had been bogus. Why, she’d sent it hadn’t been apparent, but her telling me we were done via a text was bullshit, and I should have questioned it from the start. Hardest thing I’d ever had to do was send that response, hoping if I played along it might keep her safe. Not that I meant a word of it, Presley calling the police and getting a trace put on her phone, dispatch calling us as soon as Penny’s 9-1-1 had come in. I’d never driven so fast in my life, Tibbs and Leighton hearing it over the emergency scanner and meeting me in the parking lot while SWAT went in.
The puzzle pieces started to come together even if the whole picture hadn’t been revealed, but her intent had been clear. She’d been trying to protect us, putting herself on the line to make sure Presley and everyone else stayed safe. And I couldn’t have loved her anymore if I’d tried. Penny made her statement how Hayden wouldn’t leave, my brave—and fucking crazy—warrior staying there until the end.
“What are you doing here?” I met Riley’s gaze; his focus unmoving. “Why aren’t you home with Quinn and Ava?”
“Because I was needed here. Now stand down, Mack. You might be able to take on one of us, but not even you can take on all three.” It was without the usual old-man ridicule, illustrating that he wasn’t joking. And while I wasn’t sure he was right, we didn’t need anyone else ending up in a stretcher.
“Fine, you drive. But you drive like you have a purpose, North.” I fingered him in the chest, unable to even think straight. “And someone find out where the hell they’re taking her. We also need to call her family.”
“I can do that. Her brother is her emergency contact. I’ll call.” I hadn’t even noticed Penny had still been standing there, her eyes connecting with mine. “Go, just get one of your guys to let me know which hospital.”
I nodded, Leighton already on the phone as North pulled out his keys. “We’re out of here. Text me the info.”
North and I jogged out to the truck, his Explorer parked beside my Chevy. “Tibbs call you?”
“Leighton, and I’m glad he did.” He started the truck as I buckled up, slamming it into drive and accelerating.
“She’s at New York-Presbyterian Allen on Broadway, not even five minutes away.” I said a silent prayer of thanks. “You can drop me off and go back home.”
“I think it’s hilarious that you think you have any say right now, Chief. I’m on leave, so you’re currently not my boss. And I’m too old for you to pull your dad card. Because we both know if that were Quinn, you wouldn’t be leaving me.” He signaled, making a left onto Broadway and looking for a parking spot.
“It’s not the same—” I didn’t finish, unable to say the words. Because even I knew it was bullshit. The connection Hayden and I had was no less than what he had with Quinn, and fuck if he wasn’t right in that I wouldn’t have left his side.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought. So how about you let me be there for you for a change, and trust I’m man enough to handle it. Now, stop arguing and let’s find out where she is.”
Shutting my mouth and doing exactly what he said, I waited until the car had come to a complete stop before getting out. I wasn’t crazy about the dynamic, liking to be the one in charge, but I had to admit my judgment was more than a little cloudy. And if I was honest, I was really glad I wasn’t alone. We fell into step as we went through the ER doors, not stopping until we hit the nurses’ station.
“Hey, Mack,” Lou, a transfer from my neighborhood cracked a smile. “We got one of yours in here tonight?”
“Hayden Green. Gunshot. Arrived in the last ten minutes or so. I need to know her status.” I’d attempted to pay her the same courtesy she’d shown me, but fell short. I needed to know where Hayden was, my brain flipping to automatic with my manners being left behind.
If Lou’s feelings were hurt, she didn’t show it, tapping on her keyboard without so much as a raised brow. “She’s being moved to surgery. We’re waiting on her next of kin and you didn’t hear any of that from me.”
Whether she knew me or not, she didn’t have to tell me shit. It wasn’t one of my charges in that bed, and I wasn’t even in uniform. But first responders had a special relationship with the ER staff, having seen more of each other than probably either of us liked. So so
metimes lines were blurred, and HIPAA could kiss my ass.
“Thanks.”
I saved the explanation I knew she didn’t have time to hear and shoved my ass into a chair in the waiting room. Riley sat beside me saying nothing, my mind trying to make intelligent assessments despite my heart not giving a fuck about logic.
It was a non-fatal wound.
Chances of recovery were better than average.
She’d been conscious, vitals steady.
Unless the bullet ricocheted and nicked an artery.
Or she went into V fib on the way.
“Fuck,” I tried to get out of my own head, not possessing my usual calm as I scrubbed my face. “She’s going to be okay. She is going to be okay.”
North’s heavy hand rested on my shoulder. “She is. And while we wait until the doc comes and confirms what we already know, why don’t you tell me about this breakup, Melinda, the club, and how any of them are connected. I know I’ve had a lot going on with Quinn and Ava, but that’s not a conversation I’d have forgotten.”
Of all the conversations I wanted to have, that probably came in dead last. But it was probably going to come out anyway, so it was better he’d heard it from me.
I blew out a long breath, my muscles so tense they were starting to burn. “Melinda had designs on me being her baby daddy. Not sure where she got the idea, or why she was so fucking insistent, but it’s the reason she keeps calling me. When I heard Presley had taken Hayden to Diablo, I assumed Melinda had tried to stack the deck. It wouldn’t be the first time she’s tried to sabotage something that made me happy to further her own agenda.”
“Ha, I’d say that was pretty much your whole marriage wasn’t it?” Riley laughed, not needing another reason to dislike her. “I swear, you need a ring of salt and a fucking priest anytime you deal with her. I assume you hadn’t told Hayden about any of it?”
“You would assume right. And considering Hayden had said she wanted a baby, it didn’t seem like a good time to bring it up.” I still should have said something, if for no other reason to explain my initial hesitation.
Riley’s face pulled into a grimace. “Oh shit.”
“Yep.” My fingers squeezed the bridge of my nose. Oh shit was putting it mildly.
He shrugged, shooting me a sympathetic smile. “Yeah, probably not the best time to bring it up. But you want them, right? Kids. I mean, I know they’re not going to be as perfect as your first, but I’m sure you’ll love us all the same.”
“Here I thought fatherhood would make you more mature.” I rolled my eyes while shaking my head.
“Honesty trumps maturity, Mack. I’m just keeping it real. And stop avoiding.”
“Yes. I’d assumed that ship had sailed, but given the chance with Hayden, yes, I want that. Fuck, right now I’d give her a truck load of kids, keep her pregnant for the next five years just to hear she’s okay.” My chest expanded, the knot between my rib cage making it hard to breathe. “I want all of it. The trip to City Hall, the rings, the anniversary dinners, fighting over television stations, and growing old together. And, yeah, I want kids, Riley. I want her babies because she’d be one hell of a mother. But more than any of that, I need her back. I need her in my fucking arms where I know she’s safe.”
If I got that chance, I’d never let her go, willing to take whatever hardship life had in store. Ironic that of all the good I’d accomplished, the commendations, the medals, and all that other stuff, I hadn’t been able to do the one thing that mattered.
“It’s not your fault,” Riley pulled me from the shit in my head, making me wonder if I hadn’t said it out loud. “I know you try harder than any person I know, Mack, but you can’t stop bad things from happening.”
“I should have been able to stop this one.” I wasn’t sure how, but it felt like it was on me. If I’d just dug deeper on the Lewis thing, told her about Melinda, just fuck—I don’t know. “I just should’ve.”
North punched me lightly in the shoulder, getting my attention. “Did you ever think maybe she doesn’t need saving, Mack? Maybe that’s why you feel the way you do about her, because she doesn’t need you to ride in on your white horse. Sounds to me like she more than handled herself. And while I’d be just as out of my head if it were Quinn, I’d have been fucking proud. She looked that bastard in the eye, Mack. She didn’t run. And when she wakes up, she’s not going to run from you either.”
“Christ, Riley,” I shook my head, swallowing hard a few times so I didn’t lose it. “When the fuck did you get to be so fucking smart?”
The kid had come a long way, seeing things in me that I probably didn’t much notice. And he wasn’t wrong. I had a tendency of wanting to make shit right, to fix things, to make everyone else okay. But Hayden hadn’t needed that, not really. She was stronger than any woman I’d ever met, and the only thing she’d needed from me was to love her.
That’s it.
And I did.
Completely.
Gayle and her brother ran in, looking frantically at the front desk. I knew that look, saw it too many times to count, and needed to man up and let them know as much as I could.
“Hey,” I stepped toward them, both of them turning at the sound of my voice. “She’s in surgery.”
Gayle threw herself at me, hugging me before I’d even noticed what was happening. “I can’t believe she was shot. She has to be okay.”
North and I filled them in as best we could, Lou adding what she was able. And then the four of us sat down and waited, because apparently that was all we could do.
“She’s going to be fine.” I turned to Gayle, and for the first time actually believing it. “Better than fine because she has all of us.”
Hayden
IT DIDN’T HURT when I was shot.
At least not that I remembered.
There was an impact, my body being unable to stand but I didn’t feel pain.
But waking up was a different story.
“Hurts.” I tried to pull off the oxygen mask, realizing I was at a hospital. Hopefully that would make getting drugs easier, the need for some pain relief of the utmost importance.
“Hi, Hayden, we’re going to give you some morphine now you’ve woken up. It should help make you feel more comfortable.”
There was a kind face above me, coming into focus as I blinked. I assumed she was a nurse. Or a doctor. Hell, she could have been the janitor and I wouldn’t have cared as long as she gave me morphine. Her hands worked quickly, injecting something into the IV in my hand.
I had no idea how long I’d been out, waking from what felt like a weeklong sleep with memories of before really hazy.
Mack.
Mack had been there before I’d gone to sleep.
“Mack,” I croaked, my throat feeling raw and scratchy. “Where’s Mack?”
What I probably should have asked was where was I shot and am I going to be okay? I assumed since I didn’t die at least half of the question was redundant. And the searing pain radiating from my upper chest to under my arm answered the first part. So since I’d solved most of the riddle, I needed to know where Mack was, so I could tell him that I loved him.
I’d tried to tell him before, thinking it was going to be my only chance. But I wasn’t sure if he’d heard the words, my mouth having a difficult time trying to work when my body wanted to shut down. He needed to know. Know I hadn’t meant what I’d said before and that I didn’t care if it still meant we weren’t together, I wanted him to have the truth.
“You’re still in recovery. We’ll be wheeling you down in a minute, and then you can see him. He’s waiting with the rest of your family. You’ve got quite a crowd.” Her smile widened even if her words didn’t make sense. I assumed Gayle and Matt would be there, maybe they’d brought the kids? Other than that, I had no idea who would be waiting. Unless Riley was with Mack for moral support as well.
“Thank you,” I sighed, feeling my body relax as the morphine started to kick in. Everyth
ing still hurt, but it wasn’t as unbearable as before, my eyes closing as I felt myself wheeled from the room. The gentle rock of the bed combined with the drugs made me want to sleep, but the nurse had mentioned me being able to see Mack and I didn’t want to miss it.
The movement stopped, hands lifting me from one bed to another and then the oxygen mask being removed. A tube was inserted up my nose, the hiss of cool air not feeling as invasive as I’d imagined as they positioned me more comfortably. I hadn’t even noticed my arm was in a sling, bandages wrapped around my chest and shoulder making my hospital gown hang off awkwardly.
“There, that should be better,” she appraised her handiwork, the two other nurses/orderlies/janitors who’d joined us on our journey leaving the room. “You can have visitors, but only one or two at a time. Is there someone you want to see first?”
“Mack, I want to see Mack.” My throat still felt raw, my body exhausted but it didn’t matter. I forced my eyes open, watching as she left and not blinking as I looked at the door.
And then he was there. One minute the gap between the frame empty, and then filled with his huge, hot body.
His eyes locked on me.
“Hayden.”
I wasn’t sure if he’d said more than my name, my attempt to lift my arm and reach for him hindered by the bandages. He didn’t care, not needing the invitation as he came closer, dropping his mouth to mine. “I love you. I love you so goddamn much and I was terrified I’d never be able to say it again.”
I tried to kiss him back, my lips not cooperating as they smashed against his with no coordination. “I love you too. I’m sorry for the message.”
“Listen to me,” his hands tilted my chin. “You have nothing to be sorry for. Ever. I know why you sent it. The same reason why I sent one back. Neither of them meant anything, because I know what’s in your heart. And, Hayden, you have to know what’s in mine.”
