by Sian Ceinwen
“You have been wearing too many clothes for too many hours,” he declared.
“So have you, although I’m sure nobody would’ve complained if you’d been up on that stage naked. I know I wouldn’t!” She told him cheekily.
“Oh my god, we won a Grammy!” Gabriel said in shock, as though it was only just sinking in.
“You won many Grammys,” Ariana laughed.
“It’s been a lifelong dream of mine,” he told her, “I can’t believe it’s finally come true.”
“I’m so proud of you,” she said, leaning up to kiss him again.
There was no talking after that. They made their way to the bed, where they stayed for the rest of the night, cocooned together, making love off and on—sleeping between sex sessions. It truly had been an amazing night.
The Fourteenth Song
They’d woken up in Gabriel’s bed late in the morning after the Grammy Awards, still riding the high from the night before. Gabriel called room service to bring them some breakfast and turned the Do Not Disturb off their room as he hung up the phone.
No sooner was the earpiece back on the hook than the phone started ringing. Gabriel picked it up in surprise.
He answered the phone, “hello?”
There was a pause as he listened to whatever the other person was saying, and his expression clouded over.
“No comment,” he said, hanging up.
“What the hell was that?” Ariana asked.
“I’m not a hundred percent sure,” he said with a frown as the phone started ringing again, “I’m pretty certain it was a journalist. They congratulated me on our win last night and asked me what I thought about the article the Daily Mail posted online this morning.”
Ariana picked up the phone that was still ringing and answered it.
“Hello?” She answered it.
“Who’s this?” A male voice on the other end of the line asked.
“Who’s this? You called me, not the other way around.”
“I’m calling to speak to Gabriel Knight,” the man said.
“He’s not available right now, can I give him a message?”
“Yeah, but who are you, though?” He sounded way too curious for Ariana’s liking.
“No comment,” she said and put the phone down, taking the time to put the Do Not Disturb back on.
“Fuck,” said Gabriel, “you probably shouldn’t have answered that.”
“Why?” Ariana asked.
Gabriel spun his laptop to face her. Sprawled across the top was the headline:
MY NIGHT WITH CRUISE CONTROL
All the sordid details of their out-of-control Grammy partying
Ariana’s mouth fell open into a shocked ‘O,.’ She covered her mouth with her hand as she read the rest of the article. It was an in-depth account of their night from an exclusive interview they’d done with Sebastian’s former date, who was apparently called Stacey.
The first two paragraphs were detailing the time she’d spent with Sebastian, including the sex they’d had between the soundcheck and the awards. She’d gone into detail about Ariana and Gabriel’s formerly secret relationship, including Ariana’s breakdown, which she made sound as though it had happened right in the middle of the red carpet. The only minor upside was that apparently Heather’s comment had stuck, and she referred to her as Ariel.
Heather was painted as a stuck-up bitch who had no time for any fans because she’d been with Harrison for so long. There was nothing about Stacey being put in her place, and instead, she heavily implied that she’d declined an invite to the after-party because she couldn’t stand being around them any longer.
“Shit,” Ariana said, unable to find any other words.
“Yeah, Cooper’s going to lose his mind,” Gabriel cringed as he grabbed a pair of jeans and pulled them on, then picked up his phone and dialed.
Gabriel went into the living room to talk to Cooper, and the conversation seemed tense. Ariana started scrolling down through the comments. A lot more were supportive of the band than were negative, but the ones that were negative were incredibly harsh.
“Wait, so your telling me this bitch has the best boyfriend in the world, and she doesn’t want to be seen with him? Ducking moron.”
“Gabriel is the sexiest man alive!!! Ariel doesn’t deserve him!!1”
“I swear I met that chick at a meet and greet. She was an udder cow.”
“Fuck Ariel! Wot a birch!”
Ariana felt hot tears come to her eyes—this was her worst nightmare come true. She wanted to reply to the comments and defend herself. Rip shreds off them for their terrible grammar. Make them feel as small as she did right now.
She wiped away the tears and turned around from the computer only to bump into Gabriel, who was right behind her. He looked at the screen and saw the comments on there.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he said, reaching past her and closing the laptop, “don’t read that crap. You know it doesn’t mean anything.”
He hugged her close, and she nodded into his chest.
“Yeah, I know, Gabe. It’s just hard to read,” she sighed.
“Of course it is; that’s exactly why you shouldn’t read it,” he kissed the top of her head, “I hate to leave you like this, but we’re having an emergency meeting with Cooper and the record label to talk about damage control and how best to handle this.”
“That’s fine. It’s important; I’ll be okay here,” she smiled weakly at him.
“Do you want me to get Heather to come over?” He asked.
“No, don’t do that. I’ll just shower and read a book or write or something,” she told him.
“Okay, leave the Do Not Disturb on; if I need you, I’ll call your cell,” he squeezed her affectionately, “the room service arrived while I was on the phone, so have something to eat. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
He pulled a T-shirt on and kissed her quickly, then left for the meeting. Ariana grabbed her phone and looked at the screen. Her phone had completely blown up overnight. She had multiple messages from Heather, a couple from Sebastian, more messages, and some voicemails from her parents and aunt. They were all asking how she was feeling and extending their support.
She replied to the texts from her family but didn’t feel up to calling and talking to them at the moment. There would be so many awkward questions, especially from her parents, and she wasn’t sure that she could answer them right now. Instead, she dialed Heather’s number.
“Ariana?” Heather picked up almost immediately.
“Hey, Heather.”
“How are you feeling, darling? Do you want me to come over?”
“No, it’s fine. I’m going to shower and then do some writing,” she said, recycling her excuse to Gabriel earlier.
“Okay, well, I’m here if you need me. I assume Gabriel’s left for the meeting already?” She asked.
“Yeah, a few minutes ago,” Ariana replied, “it really must be serious.”
“From what I understand, it was the whole band and the execs from Sierra, Cooper, and everything. Apparently, the story has been picked up by most of the news outlets now.”
“Just what I wanted to hear,” Ariana said sarcastically, “how are you doing, though? You didn’t exactly come off well in the article.”
“Oh, you know me. I couldn’t give a shit what that fucking cow says about me. I know the truth.”
Ariana could practically see Heather tossing her hair as she said it.
“She was pretty awful. It’s kind of unsurprising that she’d do something like this,” Ariana said.
“Yeah, especially after the way Seb blew her off. Obviously, she can’t handle rejection,” Heather surmised.
“That’s the understatement of the year,” Ariana and Heather both laughed, “thanks for doing that, though, Heather. I would never have asked Seb to ditch her. I would’ve just felt like shit having her around all night.”
“Not a problem, darling. If that article was right a
nd they really had already had sex, I’m surprised that he hadn’t ditched her long before I asked him to,” Heather said in a cheeky tone.
This made Ariana laugh again, “good point.”
“Ah, well. If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. Are you sure you don’t want me to come to see you?” Heather asked again.
“No, I’m fine. I’ll come around and see you later.”
“Okay, darling, I’ll talk to you later.”
Ariana hung up the phone and ate some of the rapidly cooling breakfast food that room service had left for them. True to her word, she went and had a shower. She felt refreshed as she put on clean clothes and headed towards the living area. Gabriel’s laptop sitting on the desk caught her eye, though.
It wouldn’t hurt to read just a little bit more about what was in the news. She grabbed the laptop and sat down on the bed before opening it. The article was still open in front of her, and she refreshed to see any new comments.
Ariana was greeted with the same article as before, but an update had been added.
“Update: When approached for comment on this story, Gabriel Knight had no comment to give. We spoke to an unidentified woman in his hotel room who also had no comment but is suspected to be Ariel.”
Ariana felt sick reading the update; she really shouldn’t have answered the phone. The paparazzi had her in their sights now. This was the one thing she had wanted to avoid all along. She knew how bad this could get, and she did not want to be their meal ticket.
She scrolled back down to the comments, and there were hundreds more now. Once again, Ariana zeroed in on the negative ones.
“This can’t be serious, right? Gabriel has a girlfriend and she’s got him following her around like a puppy? Pathetic.”
“I hate that Ariel bitch. How dare she treat Gabriel like shit!”
“I’m shocked that Airel could dare treat my husband like this!!”
“If Gabriel ever wants to date a REAL woman, I’ll be here for him.”
And so it went, pages and pages of vitriol aimed at ‘Ariel.’ The more she read, the worse she felt. This was all her fault. If she’d just walked the damn red carpet with him, this wouldn’t have happened. I mean, really, it went back further than that. In all honesty, she knew from the beginning that this was a life that she could not handle living. She should have politely declined his invitation to ever go out together at all.
She’d been unable to resist him, though. This thing between them called to her soul. It was pure bliss when they were together, and to give up any of the time she’d spent with Gabriel was pretty much unthinkable. Deep down, though, she had known that she needed to leave ever since the day that she overheard Cooper and Gabriel talking. If she’d left that day, as she’d initially wanted to, then none of this would’ve happened.
Every day that she stayed on the tour since then had made her leaving harder. How many more dramas like this would she cause before she finally did the right thing by Gabriel and left this world that she’d shown time again that she wasn’t cut out for?
He would be upset, of course, he would, but he would move on. Maybe he could find another singer or an actress or something to date. Someone from his world who could handle all of this. Not an insecure mess of a college graduate who was too scared to even walk a red carpet.
Ariana wasn’t enough for him. She never would be; it was obvious to her now. She had been convincing herself for months that she was strong enough to be his girlfriend. He needed someone else, someone better. Someone who could stand in front of flashing cameras and sparkle like a diamond the way Gabriel did, himself. Not someone who hid from the bright lights, too frightened that they will burn and expose her as unworthy of him.
Ariana had told Sebastian that day in her hotel room that she was who Gabriel wanted, but that didn’t mean that she was who he needed. She would only keep screwing shit up for him if she remained in his life, she couldn’t stay here another minute.
She closed Gabriel’s laptop as her phone started ringing again. It was her mom calling her, and she answered it robotically.
“Ariana?” Her mom sounded concerned.
“Mom…” she hesitated, but then her next words came tumbling out of her mouth before she could stop them, “I want to come home.”
“Of course you do, honey, and that’s okay. We’re here for you,” her mom’s voice soothed her through the phone.
“I love you,” Ariana wiped at the tears that had started rolling down her cheeks.
“I love you too, Ariana,” her mom reassured her, “do you want me to book a flight for you?”
“Yes, please,” Ariana said, “I—I need to get packed, but as soon as possible, please. We’re staying at the Waldorf Astoria.”
“Okay, I’ll book it and send you the details. Your father and I will pick you up at the airport.”
“Thank you, Mom. I really appreciate it,” Ariana felt a wave of relief in knowing it would be sorted out for her.
“Any time, honey. I’ll talk to you later.”
Ariana hung up the phone and slipped it into her pocket. She took a deep breath. There was no time to fall apart now. She had to get organized. There would be plenty of time to lose it once she’d done what she needed to do.
She began by getting her suitcase from the spare room and bringing it into the main bedroom. She carefully went through the room, packing up everything that had been so diligently hung up or put away in drawers by the staff.
Ariana considered leaving the clothes that Gabriel had bought for her, but she decided to keep them. If she left them behind, it might be insulting, and the worst that could happen by taking them was that Gabriel might think she had been using him all along.
Once everything was packed up, she took her suitcase down to her room. She would leave it there and grab it when she was leaving, but she owed it to Gabriel to say goodbye first, the way she had promised him that she would.
As she went back to his room to wait, Ariana felt sick. She hated that she would be ambushing him with this. He had no idea what he was coming back to, and she felt horribly guilty about that.
Her mom texted her that she’d been booked on the five o’clock flight that night from Los Angeles to O’Hare. She was grateful that it was a direct flight to Chicago, and she wouldn’t have to do a stopover anywhere. Armed with the flight details, she used her phone to check-in online so there would be less stress once she was at the airport.
She sat on the end of Gabriel’s bed with her hands folded in her lap. Tears started rolling down her face again, and her heart felt as though someone had reached inside her chest cavity and was squeezing it.
She had no idea how long she’d been sitting there before she jumped at her phone, pinging her with the sound of a text message from Gabriel.
On my way back. See you soon. Love you.
Ariana wondered how the hell she was going to find the strength to have the conversation she was about to have. He really was too good for her, and he didn’t deserve any of this.
She felt sick with nerves as she waited for him to arrive and jumped when the door to the room opened twenty minutes later as Gabriel walked in.
“Ari?” he called out to her, “the meeting went well, where are you?”
“I’m—I’m in here,” she replied, trying to swallow back the lump in her throat.
He walked in and saw her sitting at the end of the bed.
“What are you doing?” He asked her quizzically.
“I’m sorry, Gabriel,” that was all she managed to get out before the tears started falling again.
He instinctively moved towards her to comfort her, but she put her head in her hands and shook her head for him not to.
“What’s going on?”
“I can’t do this,” she told him.
“Can’t do what, Ari?” She heard a tone of fear creep into his voice.
“Any of this. I’m going home, Gabe. I’m sorry,” she raised her face to look at his.
&n
bsp; “Is this—” he paused mid-sentence and looked around while collecting his thoughts, “—are you serious?”
“Yeah, I am,” she replied.
“And you’ve already packed,” he sighed.
“Yeah, I have. I promised that I would never leave without saying goodbye.”
“Why are you doing this, Ariana?”
She wanted to go over and comfort him, but it was too dangerous. She knew how close she was to giving in to staying here, even though she knew that she shouldn’t. She’d proven time and time again that she was bad for him.
“I’m sorry, Gabe, I just have to,” her voice cracked as she ended her sentence.
“That’s not an answer. I love you; you know that. This bullshit will pass.”
He didn’t understand; he couldn’t understand yet that he would be far better without her in his life. Better off with a woman by his side who could walk red carpets, deal with paparazzi, and be okay with that part of his life.
“I’m just causing trouble for you, though. You’d be better off without me here.”
“What trouble? Nobody’s mad; we just needed to work out how we’re going to officially react to this.”
He started to come over to her, and she held her hand up again to stop him. Even with her mind made up, her body was longing to stay here with him. She couldn’t risk his touch.
She got up off the bed and walked to where he was standing in the doorway. When she reached the front door, she opened it and paused before leaving.
“I never meant to hurt you.”
“Don’t do this, Ari,” he pleaded.
As her heart was surely shattering into thousands of pieces, she walked out on the only man she’d ever truly loved. The walk down the hallway to the lifts and the trip down to her hotel room felt like it took forever. She knew that every step she took was taking her away from Gabriel, and this life with him.
When she got into her room, she sat on the bed and cried. Her suitcase was sitting by the door, packed and ready to go to the airport. She looked at the clock, it was only eleven in the morning, and she had hours to kill before she had to leave.
