He stepped away from her closet and gestured at the open door. “Make it quick.”
Alyssa didn’t waste time by being selective with her wardrobe. She grabbed the first pair of jeans she encountered and a casual sage green T-shirt with a deep ‘V’ at the neck. In five seconds flat she’d discarded her running clothes and donned the clean outfit. Five more, and she had deodorant applied and her feet tucked into a pair of flip-flop sandals. “Ready.”
With a short nod, Jayce draped her dress over his arm and settled his hand in the small of her back. He guided her out the door, down the stairs, to the hall. As they passed the kitchen, Alyssa spied Brice sitting at the small breakfast table. Kane stood in the doorway, looking for all intents and purposes like an intimidating guard.
Jayce didn’t give her time to ask questions. Steady pressure at the base of her spine urged her past the kitchen, down the remainder of the hall, and out onto her front porch. His pace quickened outside, and she had to double her steps to match his stride.
“In,” he instructed as he jerked open the passenger’s door.
Alyssa ordered herself to not look around and ducked into the truck. The door slammed the instant she pulled her feet inside. As she buckled in, Jayce dashed around the hood and climbed behind the steering wheel. He didn’t bother with the seatbelt. Instead, he jammed his foot into the gas, and the truck sped backward out of her drive.
“What did Brice say?” she asked once they’d rounded the block and were heading toward the main thoroughfare. To her shame, a note of disbelief clung to her question. On hearing the brittle quality, heat touched her cheeks.
Jayce evidently heard the tone as well. He made a harassed noise. “He claims it’s some government initiative. Up until someone shot at me, I was willing to believe maybe he’d been duped. But any agent working something here would have already checked me out and no way in hell would they fire on me. I may not have my credentials—” Jayce stopped abruptly, then smacked the ball of his hand on the steering wheel. “Shit! I should have thought of that already.”
“Of what?”
“My credentials were stolen. Someone’s probably using them to convince McTavish they’re working for the government.”
Alyssa pressed her fingertips to her temples. “You’re making my head hurt. What do they want with me? Why would Brice do something that would put me in danger?”
“I don’t know,” Jayce answered, then repeated more quietly, “I don’t know.”
“Come on, Jayce, he was your best friend once. Do you really think he’d do something like that?”
“No. And I don’t want to think he would. But facts are hard to deny, particularly when he declared his guilt. He knows he put you in harm’s way. He knows exactly what’s going on.”
Brice involved with Parker. No matter how many ways Alyssa turned the possibility around in her mind, she couldn’t accept it. It was as surreal as learning Santa didn’t exist; the same desire to denounce the truth and cling to the illusion clouded her mind. “I can’t deal with this right now.” She leaned back on the headrest with a quiet groan.
It was too much; the whole damn day was too much. Just when she’d finally found the courage to confront her fears, fate seemed determined to throw her back into cowardice. Worse, she still needed to have the discussion she’d planned for after the rehearsal dinner. At the rate things were going, disaster seemed imminent.
T h i r t y – f o u r
Seeing Jayce in a tux, while standing in a showroom filled with expensive wedding gowns, erased all concerns for her safety and tortured Alyssa far more than she could have imagined was possible. She found herself thrust back in time, surrounded by memories of thumbing through bridal magazines and ferreting away her paychecks from her part-time job to make the initial deposit on the dress she’d wear when she became his wife. It was agonizing to ignore those draping white gowns with their delicate lace and dainty seed pearl accents. Heartbreaking to be asked her opinion on how he looked. He looked like a fairytale prince—and she wasn’t the princess waiting to be rescued by a kiss.
When she finally escaped into his pickup, she’d fallen into silence, too afraid that if she opened her mouth to say anything at all she’d blurt everything out and break down in the middle of the bridal shop. She watched the world pass by beyond the passenger’s window, knowing she should be more concerned about the danger surrounding her, but unable to focus on anything but the desperate desire to reclaim the dreams she’d let slip through her fingers.
What Parker might do, she couldn’t influence. And Jayce had only confirmed her suspicion that the only way Parker could have known she turned over the files was if Marston were tied in with him—which nullified her options even further. On the other hand, she could control reclaiming her happiness. And the outing to the bridal shop only made her more convinced to talk to him tonight.
“So, I’ve been thinking,” Jayce commented as he slid behind the truck.
“About?”
“Parker.”
Her stomach balled. “Oh.” She pulled herself out of the past and forced her attention on the dire matters at hand. Twisting in the seat to face him, she asked, “And?”
“Tomorrow night is Jasmine’s wedding. Tomorrow night is when Brice said this would all be over. I’m not satisfied with just waiting to see what happens, and let’s say he is telling the truth, that he’s involved in something governmental.”
“Okay,” she agreed thoughtfully.
“If he’s an asset or a source, and he’s been discovered, he’s smoking serious crack if he thinks Parker’s just going to give up at a set date and time. They’re going to hunt him.”
And me. Jayce didn’t need to say it, but she heard the unspoken implication in his tone. A chill slid down her shoulders. She really needed to be focused on this situation, not wrapped up in the frivolous matters of her heart. Her heart meant nothing if she wasn’t alive. She nodded absently.
“On the other hand, if he’s not a source, and he’s mixed in deeper than he thinks, he’s not just washing it off his hands like mud. It’s going to follow him.”
“So what are you getting at?”
“I want to make a few calls when we get to Jordan’s and see if I can get someone out here.” His gaze slid to hers. “But I want you to get out of town for a little while.”
“Okay,” she agreed quietly. She could take the most important client files with her; taxes could be figured from anywhere her cell phone worked. It would be hectic, but she wasn’t about to argue.
Jayce rushed on as if he hadn’t heard her. “I know it’s not ideal. I know you’ve got work to do. I know you have people depending on you. I still don’t like the idea of you being in the line of fire. Hell, I’ll go with you, if you want.”
“Jayce.” She reached across the console to set her hand on his thigh. “I said okay.”
He blinked, tipped his head, and gave her a grin. “That was easy.”
Alyssa shrugged. “Sometimes it’s not worth the fight. Neither you or I have any idea exactly what is going on. Parker is in jail. Who knows where his contacts are coming from? My house isn’t safe. Brice…” She trailed off on a sigh, then ran her hand down Jayce’s muscular leg to his knee. “I could go away with you for a while.”
His hand covered hers, and his fingers squeezed.
Taking advantage of the truce she’d just agreed to, Alyssa blurted out, “Jayce, I really don’t want to go to this rehearsal dinner tonight. Do you think I could stay at Jordan’s? If she has a computer I could use, I’ve got a hell of a pile of work to catch up on.”
His immediate frown told her he didn’t care for the idea, and she braced for an argument. He turned a corner and passed two blocks before he answered. “The point in your leaving your house is so I’m with you. What’s so terrible about going to a dinner with my family?”
Before Alyssa could stop her tongue, her bottled-up feelings came rushing out. “Do I have to spell it out for you, Jay
ce? Jesus. It’s not a dinner. It’s a wedding dinner! And all it does is remind me of what I don’t have. What I did to us. I don’t know what I’m doing right now, someone wants to kill me, and you want me to go sit while everyone celebrates and pretend everything is okay. It’s not okay! I’m not okay. I want— ” Stunned by her lack of control, she abruptly stopped. I want it all back.
Jayce rolled his fingers around the steering wheel, his upper body tense as he stared at the road in front of them. He eased through a traffic light and turned down a residential street. Quietly, without looking at her, he asked, “You want what?”
“Nothing,” she mumbled, crossing her arms over her breasts and once again shifting to face the passenger window.
“No. Finish it. You want me to leave? You want it to all go away? You want to forget our past?” His voice hardened as he turned into the driveway of a stucco grey and white townhouse. “You want what, Alyssa?”
“I want it back,” she answered so quietly even she had to strain to hear her words.
The truck stopped. Jayce sat motionless. Silence descended on them, uncomfortable and shaming Alyssa for letting her emotions get the better of her. What a way to confess. She might want it back, but she couldn’t have it back. Not the way it once had been. Innocence was lost to them. She’d hurt him too much, and the scars she suffered ran too deep.
Needing to escape the oppressive confines of the truck, she fumbled for the door handle.
Jayce’s fingers wrapped around her upper arm, halting her escape. Slowly, Alyssa turned to face him. He lifted his hand and brushed his knuckles over her cheek. “I can’t give you that, when you’re hiding from me.”
“I know,” she whispered. She cleared her throat to rid herself of rising emotion. “Can we talk after the dinner?”
A faint, tender smile lifted the corners of his mouth. “I’d like that a lot.” He chuckled softly. “Hell, I’d skip the dinner, but there might not be much left of me to talk to if I did.”
His attempt at humor lightened her spirits enough she could return his quiet laugh. “You always said Jasmine was bossy.”
“And she doesn’t fight fair.”
Alyssa’s grin broadened.
His fingers slid into her hair, and he drew her forward to brush his lips across hers. “You’ll like Jordan. I’m sure she won’t mind if you stay and use her computer while we go to the dinner. You’ve got your cell phone on you, don’t you? You won’t get ticked if I check in?”
Shaking her head, Alyssa pulled away. She’d won the battle, but knowing his disappointment, didn’t feel so victorious. “I’ll go, if you want me to. Maybe it won’t be so bad.”
He stroked the side of her face with the pad of his thumb. “Are you sure, baby doll? I don’t want to make you miserable.”
She nodded with more conviction. “It’s probably smarter to go. Parker might be watching me now.”
“Well, let’s get cleaned up then. We’ve got about an hour before we have to leave.”
Alyssa couldn’t resist teasing. “Can I share the shower with you?”
Desire flashed in Jayce’s eyes, a bright gleam that set off tingles of exhilaration beneath Alyssa’s skin. When he answered, his voice held a husky scrape. “I think that’s mandatory. Time constraints and all.”
“Mm-hm.” Chuckling, Alyssa let herself out of the truck and waited on the front walk for Jayce.
When he joined her, the flutters of anticipation in her belly gave way to apprehensive tightness. After ten years she’d finally meet the sister Jayce would move mountains for. What would Jordan think? Would she look like Jayce?
She followed Jayce up the walk to the door, where he let out a quiet oath. Alyssa gave him a puzzled look.
“Left so fast this morning I forgot the key.” He rapped on the door. “She’s home. We parked beside her car.”
They had? Alyssa turned over her shoulder to look at the truck. Sure enough, a bright red Cavalier sat beside Jayce’s bright red truck. Down to the same paint color—she laughed inwardly. She must have been too distracted by their conversation to notice when they pulled in.
From the within the townhouse, a chain rattled. Then the knob turned and the door swung inward. “Forgot the key, huh?”
Jayce stepped back and ushered Alyssa forward. “Jordan, this is Alyssa.”
Alyssa’s anticipatory smile vanished as her heart and stomach violently exchanged places. Wide turquoise eyes stared back at her in silent, horrified recognition. A memory flashed through Alyssa’s mind, those same wide eyes laughing over the brim of a plastic cup of beer. The same mahogany hair dancing in the nighttime, mountain breeze.
And then the sound of the girl’s screams, Jordan Honeycutt’s screams, ricocheted through Alyssa’s mind.
* * *
Jayce caught Alyssa as she wobbled unsteadily into the doorframe. Her hand locked on the door jamb, keeping her from falling, but the shudder that rolled through her body vibrated into Jayce. His protective instincts surged to the surface, and he wrapped an arm around her waist to steady her further. “Alyssa? What’s wrong?”
“Oh, my God. It’s you,” Jordan whispered.
He realized then that Alyssa wasn’t the only woman standing in stunned stupor. His sister stood riveted in place, the same mix of recognition and horrified shock etched into her features. In a flash instant of time, ten years of his life rewound through his mind. The message on his answering machine two days after his sister snuck off to go to the senior graduation party. Twenty-four hours after, Jayce’s mother told him Jordan had been raped. She’d been with another girl, who she didn’t know, who never came forward. Alyssa disappeared. Jayce, there is no more baby. My parents blamed me.
Fuck!
Understanding crashed over his shoulders, weakening his own knees. He’d been so wrapped up in his own grief, so plagued by guilt over not being able to prevent Jordan’s attack, he never stopped to consider his fiancé might have been the girl Jordan couldn’t remember. Then he’d run, immersed himself in the Opals.
Jordan recovered first. She threw her arms around Alyssa and hugged her tight. Hesitantly, gradually, Alyssa pried her hand off the doorframe and embraced her. Still struggling for air, Jayce let himself inside the house. He needed to sit down. Before the moving earth beneath his feet knocked him on his ass. Alyssa raped. Now the name Michael made sense. Michael Barker, the star quarterback who had always wanted Alyssa. The same Michael who Jordan pressed charges against, along with Vince McCaffrey and Justin Flanders. The same Michael who had gotten off scott-free, along with the rest of them.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Jayce ran his hands through his hair, aware he needed to suck it up and be strong for Alyssa. What she was going through right now had to be ten times greater than what he was. But he…couldn’t. Ten years of not knowing, of trying on every possibility, of analyzing how he’d screwed up and lost her. He’d never imagined this. Never dreamt the woman he loved more than life itself could have suffered so much and hadn’t confided in him.
“Why?” he barked, unable to stop the thunderous question in his head.
Alyssa extracted herself from Jordan’s embrace, and Jordan led her to a chair. She shook off the offering and chose to remain standing, her hands twining knots at her midsection.
“Jayce,” Jordan warned. “Maybe now’s not—”
“Now’s just fine.” All the anguish he’d suffered for a decade rose up to choke him, his heart focusing on one unavoidable fact. She hadn’t told him. She hadn’t come to him. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he choked out, pushing down the pain and letting anger control it. Another question jammed into his head. It spilled free without his permission. “Did you know Jordan was there?”
“No.” Alyssa shook her head, her hands working more severely around each other. She began to pace along the far wall. “I didn’t know. We didn’t introduce ourselves. I was at the beer keg with Megan, who ran off with Mark. She came up and asked if I’d go with her to
pee.” Alyssa’s words came out in a furious rush as her agitation pushed her into a faster pace. “I didn’t…know.” Her voice broke on the last word, and her entire face scrunched with an agonized grimace.
“Jayce,” Jordan warned again.
He brushed her off with a lift of his hand. He wanted to be sympathetic, wanted to be the gentleman who shut the hell up and let the woman he loved grieve. But damn it, he was hurting too. He’d been forced out. Relegated to unimportant somewhere in the course of everything and left to twist in the wind. He needed answers as much as Alyssa needed understanding.
“Alyssa, why didn’t you tell me? Why did you shut me out?”
She shook her head, and her expression cleared. To his surprise, no tears shone in her eyes. When she spoke, her voice held an unnatural calmness. “I didn’t know how.” She hurried for the door. “I can’t do this right now.” She turned an apologetic look on Jordan. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t help you.”
Heartbreaking sympathy filled Jordan’s expression. She reached for Alyssa’s hand, but Alyssa pulled away and reached for the doorknob.
Jayce bolted from his seat and braced a heavy hand on the door. Like hell she was running. He might not be winning any awards for most sympathetic partner right now, but he’d be damned if he was letting her walk out of here tottering on the edge of breaking down. He glanced at his sister over the top of Alyssa’s head. “Jordan, give us a few minutes.”
She gave him a jerky nod and disappeared down the hall. Her bedroom door closed firmly.
“Jayce, let me leave.” Alyssa’s gaze locked on his chest.
“Can’t.” He pulled her into his arms. Ignoring her rigid posture, he held her tight. “Despite what you think, you don’t need to be alone right now.”
She pushed insistently at his waist. “Let me go.”
He tucked his nose into her hair, breathing in the comforting scent of her flowery shampoo to quiet his own roiling emotions. “Is this what you were going to tell me tonight?”
Explosive (The Black Opals) Page 28
