by Aimee Carter
“You’re sure you’re all right with me sticking around for Christmas?” said Zia from her spot next to Malcolm. “Don’t get me wrong—I’d kill for a few days on the beach, but I don’t want to intrude.”
“The more the merrier, as far as I’m concerned,” said Malcolm, who looked oddly pleased at the prospect. “Simon? Nolan? Winter? Do any of you mind?”
Simon shook his head while Winter examined her nails. “I suppose that wouldn’t be terrible,” she said loftily.
Nolan made a dismissive gesture. “Don’t care,” he called from the porthole, where he was watching Atlantis grow smaller and smaller.
“Well, after that rousing display of enthusiasm, how could I possibly say no?” teased Zia. Their eyes met, and Simon hastily averted his gaze. He wasn’t sure yet whether he could trust her entirely, but she had proven they were in this together. So, reluctantly, he met her curious stare again and smiled.
Zia winked. For a moment, Simon wanted to laugh, until he shoved his hands in his pockets and felt the hot crystal where Felix usually slept. A hollow feeling settled over him, and he glanced around at the people surrounding him. He had the underwater piece of the Predator, but had lost one of his best friends in the process. Felix hadn’t been his friend to begin with, he supposed, not really—but what else would this journey and the secrets he uncovered cost him? What other devastations would success bring?
And by the time it was over, how many of his friends and family would survive?
19
MICE AND MEN
An SUV was waiting for them when they reached Avalon. While Malcolm and Zia packed the luggage in the back, Simon lingered on the edge of the dock, where Ariana waited with her adviser. It was a cloudless day, and the blue sky seemed to stretch out for miles around them as the ocean lapped at the beach, but Ariana looked like she was going to a funeral.
“Can I stay until the boat picks her up?” he said to Malcolm.
“I can’t leave you here alone,” said his uncle, lugging Winter’s heavy suitcase to the trunk.
“I’ll stay with him,” offered Zia. “You go on ahead and get the house ready.”
“You’re sure?” said Malcolm, and she nodded. “All right. I’ll send the car back to get you.”
“Take your time,” said Zia. “We’ll be fine.”
As the SUV pulled away with Malcolm, Nolan, and Winter inside, she made a show of sticking beside Simon and Ariana, but as soon as it was out of sight, she stepped away. “The boat won’t be here for another half hour, and it seems I have some Christmas shopping to do. Lord Anthony, do you mind coming with me?”
Ariana’s adviser sniffed. “I would much rather—”
“I know that sounded like a question, but it actually wasn’t,” said Zia, hooking her arm around his.
“Go,” said Ariana quietly. “I’ll be fine.”
Lord Anthony started to protest, but Zia cheerfully drowned him out with inane comments on the weather while half dragging him toward the nearest shop. There was an odd glimmer in her eye that made Simon think she once again knew more than she was letting on, but this time he was grateful.
Ariana sat on her suitcase at the edge of the dock, staring into the blue water with a faraway look. Simon waited nearly a full minute for her to say or do something, and when it became clear she wouldn’t, he sat down on the wooden planks beside her. “We need to talk.”
“No, we don’t.” Though her words were biting, there was no fight left in her voice.
“Yes, we do. Something’s going on with you, and I’m not letting you out of my sight until you tell me what it is.”
Ariana turned away. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Did I do something?” he said. “You know I’m not mad at you for what happened with Orion, right?”
“It isn’t that,” she mumbled. “Not everything has to do with you, Simon.”
“I—” He squinted at her. “Then what’s going on?”
She said nothing. After several seconds, however, her eyes watered, and her chin started to tremble. Without saying a word, Simon stood and wrapped his arm around her.
Ariana burst into tears. For several minutes, she sobbed into his shoulder, and all Simon could do was not let go. He’d never seen her cry before, not like this. Ariana was the toughest person he knew, and seeing her break down—a lump formed in his throat. She was supposed to be the strong one, the one who never let anything get to her.
Maybe that was why she’d let it build up to this point. Maybe everyone expected her to be strong, and she’d spent so long believing it that having any weakness at all made her feel like a failure. He could understand that. After all the pressure his mom and people like Leo put on him, he knew the feeling all too well. The only difference was, he knew he was allowed to be weak sometimes. Or, more accurately, most of the time. Maybe no one had ever told Ariana she could be, too.
“You can always talk to me, you know,” he said once her tears had mostly stopped. He pulled out a napkin from his pocket. A few old crumbs from Felix’s meals clung to it, but he brushed them off and handed it to her. She blew her nose.
“My mom’s sick,” she whispered. Her eyes were red and puffy, and they still leaked tears. “Really sick—not like the flu or anything. The kind she probably won’t recover from.”
Simon’s heart plummeted. “I’m sorry.” He knew all too well how empty those words must have sounded, and Ariana shook her head.
“That’s why I had to go to the summit instead of her. She isn’t strong enough. She’s been trying to hide it, but some of the other leaders in my kingdom found out, and now they’re planning to overthrow her. They can’t even let her die in peace.” Her voice crackled with anger and frustration. “This Christmas might be the last time I ever get to see her. I don’t want to go back to school, not when she’s so sick, but she insists it’s safer there. At home, there are a dozen different people plotting to kill us, and my mom isn’t strong enough to hold them off anymore. We can’t trust anyone, not even her closest advisers. And now—” She choked up. “Now I won’t even get to be there for her.”
Ariana buried her face in his shoulder, the tears starting anew, and he didn’t bother telling her it would be all right. It wouldn’t be. If her mom didn’t make it, if her kingdom erupted into war, there was nothing either of them could do to change any of it. Pretending otherwise would make them both liars.
“Can’t your mom go someplace safe?” he said. “Maybe another kingdom? Malcolm would protect her.”
“She—she refuses.” Ariana hiccupped. “I tried to convince her. Malcolm already knows. That’s why—that’s why he’s been so nice lately. But no matter what I say or do, she won’t listen. She cares about the kingdom more than protecting herself, and I don’t know what to do anymore.”
Silence settled between them until the only sound was the splash of waves against the beach. Simon kept his arm wrapped around her, and she set her head on his shoulder, now wet from her tears. He didn’t mind. Time seemed to stand still, and though a dozen different thoughts popped into Simon’s head, he stayed quiet. They wouldn’t help. Right now, Ariana needed someone to simply be there and listen.
At last, a loud growl sounded from Ariana’s stomach. Simon pulled back enough to look at her. “When’s the last time you ate?”
“Dunno. Lunch yesterday, maybe.” She managed a watery smile. “Haven’t really been hungry.”
“Yeah, me neither,” he mumbled. “Grab something at the airport, all right?”
“I will.” Ariana peered at him. Her eyes were still rimmed with red, but she looked stronger now, somehow. “It’s my kingdom next.”
“I know.” Simon pursed his lips. “You don’t think your mom would just … give us the piece, would she?”
Ariana shook her head. “I tried asking. She thinks ours is hidden well enough that no one will ever find it.”
“Do you know where it is?” he said.
“She said—s
he said I’d find out when she …” Ariana looked down at her hands. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. We’ll find it somehow.” Simon tugged on a tuft of his short hair. “You know I’m always here for you if you need to talk, right? Or—not talk. We don’t have to say anything.”
“Thanks.” She flashed him a small smile, but it quickly disappeared. “I don’t know how you keep going while your mom’s life is in danger. This feels like the world’s ending.”
“Yeah, it kind of does,” mumbled Simon. He couldn’t lie to her and tell her it would be okay. If he owed her anything at all right now, it was the truth. “You aren’t alone, though, no matter what happens.”
Ariana found his hand and squeezed it. “Thanks,” she said, her voice breaking. “You, too, okay?”
Simon took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I think right now that’s the only thing I know for sure. Everything else …” He made a vague gesture with his free hand.
“We’ll figure it out,” said Ariana. “We always do.”
“Until we don’t,” he said. She said nothing, but he didn’t expect her to. Just like he’d told her the truth, her silence returned the favor. Nothing in their world was for certain anymore, and while they would have each other, they would both still need to find a way to survive it.
Avalon was exactly the kind of town Simon had thought the base for the underwater kingdom would be. The beaches were beautiful and, in December, not crowded at all. Most of the Animalgams living on the island were families with children who hadn’t shifted yet, and it was a much more colorful place than Atlantis, with all kinds of things to do.
Simon spent most of the next two weeks on the beach. Though he was forbidden from going in the water while his injuries healed—injuries Malcolm now thought he’d received while running from Rhode—he read book after book while Nolan and Winter snorkeled and splashed around in the ocean on the warmer days. When the temperatures dipped, they went into town and spent hours exploring the island of Santa Catalina. The General had woken up shortly after the battle, and there was no sign of the flock anywhere near the coast, so Jam was even able to visit a few times now that he didn’t have an entire kingdom to worry about.
Christmas was a bright and festive occasion full of more presents than Simon had ever expected. He and Darryl had always had a quiet holiday, with Darryl cooking lasagna while they both pretended Simon wasn’t anxiously watching the front door, waiting for his mother to arrive—if she arrived at all. He regretted it now, not paying more attention to Darryl and appreciating all his uncle had done for him. And that was why, without a hint of complaint, he spent the entire day with his uncle, brother, Zia, and Winter. His mother wouldn’t be showing up, and there was no front door to watch anymore.
Jam and several of his sisters joined them for dinner, including Nixie and Coralia, who was escorted by a slightly bewildered young man who could only be her boyfriend. To Simon’s surprise, Nixie brought Winter a gift.
“I’m not apologizing,” she said as Winter handled the small box like it was a bomb about to go off. “Just thought you might like it.”
The gift, as it turned out, was a glittering opal shell turned into a hair ornament. Winter immediately slipped it into the elaborate crown of braids around her head, and from that moment on, she and Nixie were inseparable. Simon didn’t understand, but as long as Winter was happy, he supposed he didn’t have to.
In the evening, after they had consumed the last of Malcolm’s barbecue, they all gathered around a bonfire on the beach. “Daddy isn’t entirely convinced,” said Coralia, her fingers intertwined with her boyfriend’s, “but he’s agreed to meet him, so that’s a step in the right direction.”
“Coralia says her family has a thing for the ocean,” said her boyfriend, pushing back his long hair. “I was practically born on a surfboard, so I’m not too worried.”
As the others tried to muffle their snorts of laughter, Zia touched Simon’s elbow. “Do you mind helping me with something?” she said quietly.
There was nothing Simon could think of that she could possibly need his help with, but he nodded anyway, curious. Things between them were still a little awkward, though she’d been nothing but kind to him, even cracking a few jokes that had made Malcolm turn red and insist she remember they were kids. Simon hadn’t minded—he couldn’t remember laughing that hard in a long time, and Zia seemed to appreciate the ice breaking between them. So, for that matter, did Simon.
He followed her down the beach, toward a cove he and Nolan had explored a few days earlier. As soon as the coast curved out of view of the others, Zia stopped, and Leo walked out of the trees with a small wrapped package tucked under his arm.
Simon froze, rooted to the sand. He hadn’t seen or heard from Leo since the revelation that he had sent Felix to spy on him, but part of him had been expecting something like this. His newfound grandfather didn’t seem like the type of person to let an argument go unfinished.
“I’ll give you two a moment,” said Zia, and she headed toward the water, putting several yards between them.
“You look stronger,” said Leo after a heavy few seconds of silence. “Well rested.”
“Thanks, I think,” said Simon. “What are you doing here?”
“I wanted—needed to clear up a few things,” said his grandfather. “Well, we both did.”
Felix popped his head out from Leo’s pocket. Simon immediately took a step back, any hint of forced politeness dissipating between them. “I don’t want to talk to you.”
“I don’t want you to talk,” said Felix. “I want you to listen. I’m your friend, Simon. Not a spy, not a rat—your friend.”
“If this is how you treat your—”
“I wasn’t finished,” snapped Felix, jumping onto Leo’s shoulder. “You weren’t supposed to be my friend—I was supposed to keep an eye on you and watch for any signs of danger, and that was it. No part of it included getting chummy. But I did it anyway, because you did things other humans didn’t. You helped injured pigeons, you nursed me back to health after I showed up half-starved—”
“You can’t pretend that was real anymore,” said Simon, frustrated.
“But it was. The rats took all the good food, and I wasn’t about to go Dumpster diving,” said Felix. “You didn’t treat any of us like an enemy, no matter what kingdom we belonged to.”
“I didn’t know about the kingdoms then,” he pointed out.
“Doesn’t matter. You still do it. You meet someone and you see who they are, not what they are. You got any idea how rare that is, kid?”
Simon shrugged, caught off guard. “I—”
“I’m still not finished.” Felix glared at him with his beady little eyes, and Simon quieted once more. “I get it. I hurt you. I’m sorry. Cross my heart, hope to die and all that—I never meant to, you know. Neither of us did. All we ever wanted was to keep you safe. Sometimes that meant making stupid decisions or not telling you everything, but it’s all out in the open now. It doesn’t have to be all secrets and lies anymore, and I don’t want it to be. I want to be your friend. That’s it, full stop. I won’t apologize for protecting you, but I will apologize for hurting you, because you’re right—that was a ratty thing to do. Friends don’t hurt friends, and I won’t do it to you again, not if I can help it.”
Simon stared at him, and Felix tugged his tail nervously.
“That’s it. You can speak now.”
Anger and loneliness warred within him as the seconds ticked by. On one hand, Felix had lied to him for a year, pretending to be something and someone he wasn’t. Simon had had enough of that in his life already. But on the other, he missed his best friend. He missed his biting commentary and not-so-witty jokes, and he even missed his seemingly endless stream of complaints.
He’d managed to forgive Pearl for trying to kill him. Why was it so hard to forgive Felix for lying?
Because that had hurt more, he realized. It had been personal. He’d truste
d Felix, and this felt like more of a betrayal than anything Pearl could’ve possibly done to him. But holding on to that bitterness was eating away at Simon, and he didn’t want to be mad anymore. It was too hard, too exhausting, and he had more important things to worry about. They all did.
Decision made, he stepped forward and scooped Felix off Leo’s shoulder. “I’ll give you one more chance, but only one. No more lies,” he said sternly. “You tell me the truth, and you don’t keep anything from me, or you’ll be out on your own and have no choice but to beg the subway rats for scraps. Deal?”
Felix squirmed. “I’d rather eat my own tail than ask those vermin for a crumb.”
“Do we have a deal or not, Felix?”
With a disgusted twitch of his whiskers, the little mouse nodded, and Simon let him crawl down his sleeve and back into his pocket, where he burrowed and rearranged himself as if moving in for the first time. “You got any idea how much lint you’ve collected while I’ve been gone?”
Simon almost smiled, but when he caught Leo’s stare, any trace of happiness faded. “I don’t know if I can trust you or not,” he admitted.
“Good. You shouldn’t, not until I’ve earned it.” Leo tapped his foot against the sand, as if he could barely stand to be still. “Ask me why I don’t want the pieces.”
Simon frowned. “What?”
“You’ve been yanked around by the adults in your life long enough. I owe you an explanation, and I’m trying to give you one,” said Leo. “Ask.”
He exhaled slowly. “All right. Why don’t you want the pieces?”
“Because I don’t trust myself with them.”
That piqued Simon’s curiosity. “Why not? You already have all the powers of the Beast King.”
