He didn’t look convinced. “You don’t sound worried.”
“I’m not.”
“You’re a lot tougher than you look, but then, I already knew that.” He reached out and stroked her daughter’s arm. “You’ve got one determined mother there. Looks like you come from hardy stock.”
The baby opened her eyes and stared solemnly at Jim. “Do you want to hold her?” Heather asked impulsively.
Instantly, he pulled his hands back and shook his head. “That’s okay. I’m sure she’s more comfortable with you than with a stranger.”
“She was born less than twelve hours ago. I think we’re all still strangers to each other. Come on, it’s easy.”
He looked trapped as he rose to his feet and stood beside the bed. “I’m not going to be good at this,” he grumbled.
“Yes, you are. Now look at how I have her in my arms. You have to be careful to hold her head, but otherwise, don’t worry. Just cradle her gently and relax.”
She leaned forward a little. Jim bent toward her and took the baby, his arm brushing hers. He shifted the tiny bundle until she was secure in the crook of his left elbow. He looked big and awkward standing there, but the expression of sheer wonder on his face melted her heart.
“She’s amazing,” he said, his voice laced with awe. “So perfect.” One big finger stroked the back of her tiny hand. “Hi there,” he murmured. “Aren’t you the pretty one?” He glanced at Heather. “She’s staring at me with that worried expression all babies seem to have. Do you think they know they’re a big responsibility and are thinking that their parents might not be up to the task?”
Heather laughed. “I have no idea what’s on her mind.”
He returned his attention to the infant. “You’ll be just fine, sweet cheeks. You have a great mom. You’re going to grow up to be smart and beautiful, but you better watch out for boys. They can be lots of trouble.”
Heather’s heart filled with pride and love for this child she’d brought into the world. For a second, she felt a flash of regret that she was in this alone. It would be wonderful to have a man sharing in her joy and love. Heather would do her best to be all things to her daughter, but there would be times when the little girl would miss having a father. Heather had from time to time, despite her mother’s support and kindness.
But that wasn’t in the cards for her. Luke didn’t want anything to do with this child and Heather no longer wanted him in her life. And if she was even half as good as her own mother was to her, her baby would grow up in a house filled with love.
As she watched Jim with her daughter, she tried to ignore the erratic thoughts racing through her head. She couldn’t help noticing how appealing he was—the big, strong man holding the tiny baby. This was the stuff of greeting cards and television commercials. Oddly touching and romantic, which was crazy. More of those hormones, she told herself.
“I’ve named her,” Heather said.
Jim looked up and grinned. “Really? What?”
“Diane Michelle. My mom’s name is Diane and the Michelle part is for Michael.”
He stared at her, his expression stunned. She could read his thoughts as easily as if he spoke them aloud. “You didn’t have to do that,” Jim said quickly. “I was teasing you about naming her after me.”
“I know, but I wanted to do something meaningful to thank you. I wouldn’t have been able to get through giving birth to her if you hadn’t helped me. You did more than I could ever have hoped for. You made something that could have been scary and awful into the most wonderful experience of my life.” She paused. “I picked Michelle because I couldn’t come up with a female version of James that I liked as well.”
He stared at her a long time. She looked into his impossibly handsome face and told herself that while he might look very silly with wings, this man was definitely an angel.
“Thank you,” he said. “I’m speechless, which, my friends will tell you, is a rarity.” He glanced down at the baby. “Hello, Diane Michelle. Welcome to this world. Don’t you ever forget how special you are.” He handed the baby back to Heather and sat back down. “She’s so small. I can’t believe they’re letting you take her home tomorrow.”
“She’s nearly seven pounds,” Heather informed him. “That’s plenty big.”
Jim didn’t look convinced. “How are you getting home?”
Heather knew exactly what he was asking, but she decided to pretend ignorance. “By car.”
“You have a friend to take you?”
She didn’t have to see his face to know he was worrying about her. If she told him the truth—that she planned to call a cab—he would be offended. While it would be nice to be fussed over for a while, it was better for her to begin as she meant to continue, and that meant being responsible for herself.
“I have made arrangements, but it’s very sweet of you to worry.” She flashed him her best smile, hoping it would be enough to distract him.
It wasn’t.
His gaze narrowed. “What are you hiding?”
“Nothing. I have a ride. I’m fine.” She nodded at Diane. “We’re fine.”
“Right. I’ll be here at eleven in the morning.”
“Jim, no. That’s silly.”
“Then give me the name of your friend.” When she hesitated, he muttered something under his breath, something she was reasonably confident was unfit for a child’s ears. “You were going to take a cab, weren’t you?”
She’d never been very good at lying. Even now, she could feel color creeping into her face. “I didn’t want to impose. I’m not your responsibility. In fact, we don’t know each other at all.”
He stiffened in the chair, then straightened. “You’re right. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. I can see why you would be concerned. Under the circumstances—”
“Stop,” she interrupted. “Please.” She could read the truth in his withdrawn expression. “I did not mean to imply that I’m worried you’re an ax murderer or that you have some evil designs. When I said we were strangers, I meant I didn’t have the right to inconvenience you. If you were an old friend or family, then I would impose at will. I swear, that’s all I was trying to say. Just that I don’t want you to feel obligated.”
“I don’t feel that way. I only want to help.”
He had an honest face. Based on what she’d learned about him during their short acquaintance, she knew he was a good man. She’d met enough of the other kind to be able to recognize the difference. Part of her was wary, though, not believing he could really be all that he seemed, but as she had no intention of getting involved with Jim Dyer, what could it possibly hurt to accept his offer?
She drew in a deep breath. “To be honest, I hated the idea of taking a cab home. So if it wouldn’t be too much of an imposition, I would appreciate a ride. Eleven is perfect. We’ll be ready.”
Jim smiled then, a dazzling smile that set up a chain reaction all the way down to the pit of her stomach. He rose to his feet.
“I should let you two get your rest. It’s been a challenging day. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”
“Okay. Thanks for coming by.”
“My pleasure.”
She had the oddest feeling that he was about to bend over and kiss her cheek, but all he did was wave and walk out of the room. As she settled back on the bed, Heather couldn’t figure out why she suddenly felt disappointed and very much alone.
*
Jim pulled up in front of the hospital at ten minutes before eleven the next morning. He was pleased that Heather had decided to let him take them home. He didn’t want to think about her having to carry anything heavier than the balloons. This way, he could take care of any lifting or moving of Diane and her car seat.
Over the next few days he planned to make sure Heather didn’t have anything to worry about. He’d made that decision the previous evening. When he got home, he hadn’t been able to sleep. All through the night he’d found himself thinking about Heather and wh
at they’d shared. He’d never imagined what it would be like to help a woman give birth. Even though he’d always had the vague idea that one day he would have children, it wasn’t something he’d allowed himself to dwell on. Too many unhappy memories, he thought. But if the situation ever came up, he now had some experience.
He headed to the maternity wing and found Heather up and dressed, sitting in the chair beside her bed, holding Diane. The tiny infant was asleep, and the sight of her cradled in her mother’s arms hit him like a sucker punch to the belly. All his air rushed out and he was left gasping for breath.
It should have been like this for him. The unwelcome thought came unbidden. He’d pushed the past so far back in his mind that he hadn’t thought it could possibly find its way to the light. But it had. It should have been like this for him, he thought again. But Carrie had never given him the chance.
At that moment, Heather glanced up and saw him. “Hi,” she said with a smile. “Right on time, but then I guess she’s the only one around here who’s chronically early,” she added, nodding toward her daughter.
Heather wore a loose-fitting dress and sandals. There was a lot less tummy than before, although her midsection was still a little out of proportion compared with her thin arms and legs. Her hair had been pulled back into a ponytail and her face was bare of makeup. She looked young and excited, as if she was beginning the most wonderful adventure.
“Morning,” he said. “I see you’re all packed.”
Several shopping bags stood by the door, as did an infant car seat. “My apartment manager stopped by my place on her way to work and got me a few things,” she told him. “Including the car seat. Although I have to warn you, I’m not exactly sure how to strap it in. The directions are in the box.”
“I’m sure I can figure it out.” He grabbed the infant seat in one hand and scooped up the shopping bags in the other. “I’ll head out to the car, then come back and get you.”
“The nurse said they had to wheel me out, so we’ll meet you out front.”
He nodded and left. After stowing the bags in the trunk, he removed the car seat from its box and glanced at the directions. They seemed simple enough to him, and fifteen minutes later, the seat was firmly secured in the back. He straightened and turned to see Heather and Diane being wheeled out of the main entrance to the hospital.
As they approached, she caught sight of the car seat in place. “You’ve got the thing installed already,” she said, her voice accusing.
“Of course.”
“It must be a guy thing. I really hate that. It would’ve taken me an hour to figure it out.”
He stepped back to let her put Diane into the carrier and strap her in. “The point is, you would have figured it out eventually. It doesn’t matter how long it takes.”
“Easy for you to say, Mr. I-Can-Fix-It-In-Seconds.”
He grinned. “Some of us have it, and some of us don’t.”
“Very funny.” Heather closed the rear door and turned to thank the nurse’s aid. Then she slowly lowered herself into the passenger seat.
“Still sore?” he asked.
“Yeah. In places I didn’t know could hurt this much. But the nurses all tell me it will get better quickly.”
He made sure she was settled before he circled around to the driver’s side. There was something intimate about picking up a woman and her newborn from the hospital and taking them home. Something that screamed “family.” The sensation didn’t bother him. If anything, he was enjoying his chance to pretend that this was all his. He would take care of Heather for a while, then return to his solitary life. It was what he’d always done.
“Nice car,” Heather said as he started the engine. “It’s a BMW, right?”
“Yes, a 540, their midsize sedan. I also have a truck, which I drive most of the time, but I figured you and Diane would be more comfortable in this car, not to mention its having a trunk.”
Her big green eyes widened slightly. “A truck and a BMW. The helicopter business must pay well. I didn’t realize my baby was being delivered by a tycoon.”
“Tycoon is a bit of a stretch, but the business does do well. Executives and rock stars like to travel by helicopter and that don’t come cheap.” He rested his hands on the steering wheel. “Where to?”
She named two cross streets in the southwest part of the valley and he headed that way. Traffic was relatively light. Heather leaned back in her seat and sighed. “This is nice. I could doze off right here.”
“Did you get any sleep?”
“Not much. Some of it was discomfort, but mostly I think I was too excited. What with being a new mom and all. I figure I’ll be back to work in about two weeks.”
“What? You can’t be serious. That’s too soon.”
She looked at him. “Not the factory. I have a three-month maternity leave from them, and if everything goes as planned, I’m not returning for several months after that, or even at all. I meant my bookkeeping business. There’s an accountant who sends work my way, and I’ve found a few clients on my own. The practice is small, but it’s growing. I work out of my home, so it’s just a matter of shuffling to the computer and working on the books. I’m hoping to pick up a couple more clients, then I’ll only need to get a part-time job to supplement my income. I would prefer to stay home as much as possible with Diane.”
“You have it all worked out.”
“I hope so. I’ve known I was going to be a single parent almost from the beginning of my pregnancy, so I’ve been able to make plans.”
Heather was tough and together and had many other qualities he admired. At the next red light, he took a minute to study her profile. She had a straight nose and full lips. Pale skin made her eyes look big and dark green. She was blond and pretty. It would be very easy for men to be attracted to her. But what he liked most wasn’t her looks despite the fact that he found her appealing. Instead, he admired her character and her strength of will.
He caught the scent of something familiar. It took him a second to figure out it was baby powder and the sweet fragrance of the infant sleeping behind them. The situation was strange, he admitted.
“Do you realize that only twenty-four hours ago, you had just stepped into the elevator?” he said.
She glanced at the clock on the dashboard. “I know. So much has happened.” She pointed to the corner. “Turn right here. Then it’s the second street on your left.”
The neighborhood was older, well kept, but it hadn’t been revitalized. Large trees raised some of the curbs and the long branches nearly touched over the center of the street.
“It’s 1434,” she said, directing him to a freshly painted duplex. The cream stucco was accented by gray trim. “I have the back unit. It has a yard, which is going to be great for Diane.”
He pulled into the driveway.
“Park in front of the garage door on the right,” she said. “That’s mine. The entrance is around to the side.”
It took two trips to get Heather, Diane and their belongings into the small rear apartment. The second time he crossed the threshold, he found Heather pulling open drapes to let in the bright May sunshine and warm southern California air.
“One of the reasons I rented this place was the garden,” she said.
Jim crossed the room to stand beside her. The backyard was surprisingly large, with several trees and a row of rosebushes along a painted white fence. There were squares of freshly sprouted vegetables to the right, and on the left, a patch of brightly colored flowers.
“You’ve put a lot of work into it,” he said.
“It’s how I relax. There’s nothing like digging in the dirt to make me forget my troubles.” She waved one hand to indicate the living room. “I know it’s not much, but it’s mine.”
The room was large with a tweed sectional sofa in warm earth tones while colorful rugs were scattered across a worn hardwood floor. There were plants in baskets, several small tables with books and magazines, and a televisi
on that looked at least a half-dozen years old. Behind him was the eating area, with a light oak round table and four chairs. The whole place was clean and neat, with a welcoming, homey feeling. Heather obviously didn’t have a lot of money to spend, but she’d made the most of what she had.
“I like it,” he said.
“Want to see Diane’s room?” she asked shyly.
“Sure.”
He followed her down a short hallway. On the left, through an open doorway, he caught sight of a bed covered with a white lacy spread. There were piles of pillows and lace curtains at the windows. Without wanting to, he could picture Heather stretched out on that bed, her arms open, waiting for him….
He shook off the thoughts, telling himself they were worse than inappropriate. The woman had given birth the day before. She didn’t know him from a rock and she trusted him to be a decent person. He wasn’t about to let her down. So what if he thought she was attractive and he liked her? His personal feelings had no bearing on the situation. He owed her respect and friendship, not lust and desire.
“She’s in here,” Heather said as she entered the bedroom on the right.
This room had clearly been intended as the master. It was big and had large windows that overlooked a side garden filled with flowering vines and roses. To the left, against the far wall, was a computer desk, two tall bookcases and three filing cabinets. The walls were cream and undecorated. But to the right, the room was a baby’s idea of paradise. Yellow walls had been edged with a bunny rabbit border. Bright prints hung on the walls and there were soft fabric balloons floating down from the ceiling.
Heather stood next to a maple bassinet and gazed down at her daughter. “When I found out I was pregnant, I switched bedrooms,” she said. “This way, I can spend the day with Diane and still be able to work. The computer is quiet enough to let her sleep, as is my laser printer.” She touched the side of the bassinet. “One of my friends from the factory loaned me this for the first couple of months.”
Jim glanced around and saw a white changing table. There was a partially assembled matching dresser and a narrow box containing a crib pushed up against a wall.
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