Enough.
I looked as good as I was going to, and if it didn’t work, I could count on one of the guys to tell me to change.
I stepped out into the hall. It was quiet. This wasn’t a movie where they were all standing around waiting for me. I heard the shower running somewhere, music in Banyan’s room, and a television elsewhere. I was first ready. I grinned.
The guys were prepping, too. Maybe we all needed the fun.
I walked downstairs and sat at my computer. I’d finished the book today. The question was what to do with it now.
What did a person do when they finished their first novel?
I opened up my email and took a relieved breath. Nothing from Molly to bother me, but an email from Kay. I read through their antics, smiling. They were back in Oregon and arguing about house decorating. I shook my head. Those sisters had married the same man, lived happily that way until they lost him.
“Hey,” Chance said, leaning in the doorway. “Did we keep our girl waiting?”
I rose. “You’d always be worth waiting for.”
He roamed my body with his gaze, heat traveling everywhere on me as he did. “I imagined you in that dress. The reality is better.” He cupped the side of my face. “It does something to me to dress you. Is it… weird?”
“What’s weird?” I stepped closer to him. “I mean, what makes something weird? You want to dress me, and I like you doing it. So why do we care what is or isn’t weird?”
Chance looked incredible. He was in light blue jeans with a black belt, a white shirt, and a blue and gray pinstripe blazer. The gray was shiny, almost silver. I’d never seen him in this before but that didn’t mean it was new. We’d not really lived like this together, yet. Winter Break had been one thing, but I didn’t expect I’d seen his whole wardrobe in that time.
“Chance, you’re… beautiful.”
He waved his hand. “That’s my line.”
“Okay, but I said it first.”
Maven strode through the door. He stopped to stare at me and his mouth fell open. “God, you are gorgeous. Like perfection.” My cheeks heated up. Maven never said anything he didn’t mean.
He held out his hand, and I walked toward him, squeezing him tightly.
Maven had put on a pair of dark jeans and a silver buttoned up shirt with a color that was slightly covered up by a black blazer that matched the jeans. He hadn’t shaved in twenty-four hours, and I loved the look on him. Just a little bit unkempt in the completely put together look. He had on black shoes and didn’t seem to have put on any socks.
I blinked. I hadn’t made note of Chance’s shoes, but he had on silver ones with pink socks. I grinned. The small touches of what made them, them.
“Maven, you are gorgeous. Stunningly, so.”
Banyan whistled from the doorway. “Baby, you are pretty in pink.”
I grinned at him. He was in dark jeans with holes in the knees and a white button-up shirt that he half tucked in. His shoes were black and shiny. They tucked under the jeans so I couldn’t see if he had any socks on at all. Banyan seemed to have dressed the whole thing up with one silver bracelet he wore on his left hand.
He spun in a circle. “I remembered how to put on clothes.”
“Just not how to tuck them in.” Chance grinned at him.
“I’m making a statement. I can only be contained so much.”
Banyan walked over to me, bending over to kiss my fingertips. “That dress isn’t going to stay on you all night. Just so you know. At least one of us is going to rip it off you.”
“I…” How was it with everything we’d done together they still had the power to render me speechless and shy?
Chance touched my back where the dress was open, sending shivers up my spine. “Security has the addresses where we’re going. Let’s get out of this house.”
I nodded and let Maven take my hand, leading me outside. Life waited. And anywhere I was going with them was perfection.
Chapter 8
Dinner turned out to be at a trendy restaurant downtown where you didn’t get to see a menu. You just had to eat whatever the chef handed you. As Banyan didn’t particularly care for beets, there were a few moments of groaning, but otherwise it was a ton of fun. Maven had my fake ID so I could have had a drink, but I didn’t. I was out of the house. That had to be enough. I’d consider taking back up my attempts at alcohol when Molly was caught.
I had to start thinking of it that way. Molly would be caught.
Then there would be answers.
As it was, there was laughter and really good food. Chance leaned back in his seat, putting his hand on the back of my hair to squeeze my head gently. “This was what I wanted. Needed. Thanks for this, guys.”
“Thanks for making the reservation.” Maven set down his IPA. He did have a sort of happy glaze to his eyes that made me smile. I’d say he was feeling his drinks, just a little bit. Banyan, too. Chance had abstained, but he’d been doing that since the party when he’d way overdone, said some upsetting things, and then puked most of the night.
Chance shrugged. “I think you’ll like what we’re doing next, as well.”
“What is it?” Not that I was going to have any clue unless it was one of a dozen places I’d been before. I highly doubted it. There were too many things to do in Manhattan to repeat them. Or maybe not. I liked the movies and the theater. We could do that as much as they wanted, as many times as they liked. I’d probably suggest it soon.
“There is a very cool hotel that has a members only restaurant and bar on the top floor. It surrounds a pool and has a great view of the village. It’s a fun summer thing. I’m a member. So is Banyan. We can each bring a guest so I thought that would be a great place to top off the night.”
Maven raised his hand. “I’m actually a member also.”
“I didn’t know that.” Chance grinned. “Even easier. Our girl likes views. I’ve noticed that. Anywhere she can see for long miles.”
Banyan cocked his head to the side. “I can’t believe we still haven’t gotten her to the ocean. I bet she likes that view, too.”
“I do like water and views. That’s for sure. You guys are amazing. Thank you for tonight. For all nights. I finished writing my book today.”
The thing about finishing the book was that it actually hadn’t been as exciting as getting through the scene that had ridden me hard. The end had kind of flowed easily after that.
“Hey.” Maven grinned from ear to ear and then banged the table slightly when he did it. I giggled. “That is great news. To our published author.” He lifted his glass.
I rolled my eyes. “Not nearly. I’m not even sure I’m going to let anyone read it ever. I have no idea if it’s terrible. I kind of have to find out if it’s terrible.”
“I’m sure it’s not terrible.” Chance shook his head. “Want us to read it?”
“No.” I answered quickly. I absolutely did not want them to read it. “I think I need strangers to read it first. Some kind of critique group and then a professional editor. Then maybe you can read it. And I’m still not sure how things get published after that point, but I’ll figure it out. This is a long process that ends in maybe.”
Banyan smirked at me. The adorable look that always made me want to kiss him. He was feeling his beer, too. “You’re going to be famous, Giovanna.”
“Doubtful.” I nudged him under the table. “You’re going to be famous. Or your fake name will be.”
The waiter picked that moment to come with the bill. They all reached for it but ultimately Maven paid. Someday, maybe I’d reach for it. But for now, it was enough they wanted to bring me here.
Later, as we stood on the roof of a trendy hotel, I listened to the buzz of conversation around us. Banyan had gone quiet, and I suspected he was immersed in the view of the city. He could get lost in color. I didn’t pretend to understand it, but I knew it was a real thing for him. Maven and Chance were laughing at something, and although I stood on the outs
ide, I didn’t feel alone.
It was okay to be alone in a crowd when you knew you were wanted there, it was quite another thing to be in the middle of a circle that couldn’t care less if you existed.
There were two things I knew right then. I was going to get my book published once it was ready. One way or another. It had to be the best it could be. I wouldn’t ask readers to spend money on something that wasn’t the best I could make it. And I was going to seek happiness. Life might get complicated, but at the end of the day, that’s what I had to seek. I was holding onto this for as long as I could as tightly as was humanly possible.
* * *
The house was quiet; only the hissing of the air conditioning made any noise. Four in the morning was a funny time to come home. Sometime after three it always seemed too late to go to bed at all, like we should just drink a lot of coffee and get on with the day.
I was alone in this thought because Banyan face planted on the couch and was asleep within seconds of returning home. His snore filled the living room. I grinned. Maybe his painting binge had caught up with him.
Chance’s phone pinged, and he groaned. “It’s my brother. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”
“He knows what time it is?” I had to ask him.
He shrugged. “Jack is probably stoned out of his mind.”
“Thanks for tonight, Chance.”
He winked at me. “See you in the morning, Vonni.”
Maven took my hand. “I get you alone?”
“You do.”
He had a way of looking at me that made me feel like all he saw was the most beautiful thing in the world. I squeezed his hand in mine. He was warm and solid. Maven could make the world work just by bending it to his will. I wondered why he didn’t see himself that way.
He’d no sooner opened the door to his room than I threw my arms around him. He laughed, wrapping his arms around me as he caught me. Maven pressed his nose to my hair and breathed in deep. I shuddered as he did. Sometimes, small moments were really what added up to mean the world.
“You okay?” he asked me, practically a whisper against my ear.
I nodded. “Yes. I was just… overwhelmed with wanting to hold you. I was thinking… you could make the world do what you wanted and you have no idea.”
He sucked in a long breath. “I think you see me better than I am, Library.”
“Or maybe you don’t see yourself right.” I lifted both my eyebrows and then pulled back to regard him.
He put his hands on my chest. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“Yes.” I kissed his chin. “Always.”
He walked further into his bedroom and sat down on the bed. “I’m terrified.”
Now that, I hadn’t expected. I moved slowly, eventually dropping to my knees in front of him. “Of what?”
“Of seeing my father.” He hung his head. Maven didn’t cry. I wouldn’t expect a breakdown like Chance had. But his head hung low and that was enough to see how he felt inside.
I squeezed his knees. “When was the last time you saw him?”
“The day he left. I shook his hand. Mostly because I didn’t know what else to do. He wanted me to come visit, but I never did.”
I tilted my head to the side. “Because you were embarrassed? Or you didn’t like the thought of prison visitation? Or…”
He rubbed his eyes. “Because I fucking hate him.”
“You do?” It was hard for Maven to talk about his father. I tried not to ever make him do this. But he clearly needed it.
He took my hand and dragged me across him as he lay on the bed. Maven stared up at the ceiling, and I stared into his intense eyes. Finally, he spoke again. “I do. I fucking hate him.”
“What do you hate about him?”
Maven groaned. “Is everything allowed or do I have to be more specific?”
“Nothing has to be talked about at all. We don’t have to do this. We can change the subject.” I really hoped he didn’t do that, but I’d never push him. He’d said what he wanted to and if what he needed was to now move on, we’d do that.
Maven sighed. “I hate that he’s a criminal and not a good one at that. I hate that he’s smug, and I don’t think jail will have lessened that for him. I hate that he thinks he knows everything. I hate that he’s never sorry. I hate that my entire life I’ve heard how I look just like him, how I am just like him. Oh, Maven, you are so your father. I mean, am I that person? He doesn’t love anyone. He doesn’t care about anything. Is that inside of me?”
I gasped. I’d not seen that coming. “Maven.” I stopped him right there. The tears in my eyes weren’t for me, they were for him. “You have the biggest heart in the world. I… I can’t believe you don’t know this about yourself.” He sat up a little to look at me. “I don’t care if you look like him. That’s just… chance. He must obviously be a very good looking man. But there is no part of you that is anything of what you’ve just described.”
“I… I think the fact that you love me… I mean, I don’t say this to be needy or codependent or something… but when you say that you love me, it tells me that if someone like you could see something worthy in me to love… then I must not have too much of him in me.” He groaned. “I realize how unhealthy that must sound.”
I kissed his mouth, as softly as I could. “I know we’re all supposed to be so strong, so independent, to not need each other as much as want each other. But I get what you’re saying. I would be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes just… feel stronger because I know you’re in my life. Like hey, if Maven believes that I’m worth it, then maybe I am. It doesn’t mean I fall apart if you suddenly don’t. I don’t think. I don’t believe you’d fall apart without me either. If you know how much I love you and that means you can believe that you aren’t any part of your father, then I love that. I don’t care if it’s not… how other people think we should feel.”
He wrapped his arms around me, rolling me until I was next to him. “I came up here to make love to you. I’m suddenly really, really tired. Can I just hold you all night, Library?”
I smoothed my finger over his lower lip. “I’d love that. It’s four in the morning. Let’s both just go to sleep.”
Maven pulled the blankets over us, and I slipped out of my clothing. Next to me, he did the same. I took off my bra and panties. I wanted to be close to Maven, skin-to-skin if we could be. He seemed to get the idea, and he was naked under the covers with me, too. He leaned over me to turn off the lamp. It was quiet in the room. Occasionally, sounds from outside would filter in. I liked order to my outside noises when I slept. It was as though my brain couldn’t shut down if I wasn’t one hundred percent certain that I knew when the next sound would come.
Manhattan didn’t provide that kind of consistency. Most of the time it didn’t bother me, but tonight I was wired and awake. I didn’t want to move because I was pretty sure that Maven had conked out fast. I must have been wrong, because a few minutes later his arms came around me, and he dragged me to him so my head was on his chest.
“Need you right here.” His voice was low.
I nodded. I wanted to be whatever he needed, and I didn’t think there was anything wrong with that. Or if others thought there might be, they could go ahead and keep their opinions to themselves. I sighed against him. His heart beat strong and steady. It was exactly the white noise I needed. Sleep drifted over me.
I woke aware of two things. It was morning, and Maven was hard as a rock pressed against me. I smiled. There were worse ways to wake up than to feel this man’s obvious attraction against my rear. His breathing was steady, even. Maven was asleep.
I pushed back against him, letting my bottom hit his erection a little bit further. He made the smallest sound of pleasure in the back of his throat before his breathing returned to normal. Okay, maybe I was feeling a little bit frisky. I wanted him. I pushed back against him again, this time a little bit harder. His arms moved, traveling from my stomach up to my breasts. He mutt
ered something unintelligible as he pinched my nipple. I turned slightly in his embrace. He still hadn’t opened his eyes.
I chewed on my lip. Should I maybe just leave him alone? I leaned up to lightly kiss him. I would. If he was so asleep that he’d not roused to any of that, at least not mentally, then I was going to let him sleep longer. He must really need it.
His eyes opened when I pressed our lips together, and a second later he firmed up our embrace. He let go of my nipple to squeeze my breast harder. I kissed and kissed him.
Maven was on me fast, turning me around until he could press down over me. “I was dreaming of you and then here you were. Can you feel how much I want you?”
I grinned. I sure could. “That’s what woke me, and I may have encouraged you.”
He grinned back down at me. “Feel free to do so anytime.”
Then we didn’t need to talk. Last night had been intense in the way that four a.m. conversations always were. This morning was like a breath of fresh air. He kissed me while he lazily stroked his hands all over my body. I wrapped my arms around his neck before I bit down on it lightly. I wanted to mark him, just a little bit.
He jolted when I did, stopping his caresses to stare at me with even more heat in his gaze. “Did you just bite me?”
“I did. I don’t have to do it again, ever, if you didn’t like it.”
Maven flared his nostrils. “If I didn’t like it? I fucking loved it. Bite me anytime.”
A surge of possessiveness moved through me. He was mine. “I kind of think I did it so that every woman you meet at school knows that you belong to me. That’s a little… off. I’ll try to keep my teeth to myself.”
“I meant it. Bite me whenever you feel the urge. Don’t ever worry about me meeting anyone else, Giovanna. I am yours completely. I know what we have isn’t for everyone, the way we’re all good with this. But I am. My heart is yours. I love you.”
Undeniable: Reverse Harem Story #3 Page 9
