Sacrifice

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Sacrifice Page 29

by Cayla Kluver


  “I can see that,” the woman said, humoring her young comrade. “I’ll leave you to get on with it. But, Saadi, let me remind you that you’re to report to Rava first thing in the morning.”

  He nodded, giving a small salute. “Yes, I plan to do that very thing.”

  The soldier sighed wistfully. “Oh, how I wish I could be there.” She nudged her horse forward, adding, “Enjoy the rest of your night.”

  She headed up the street, continuing her patrol, and Saadi turned to me.

  “See how I handled that?” he proudly said. “She didn’t have a clue.”

  The fuzziness pushing at the corners of my mind prevented me from pointing out how wrong he was, so I nodded and snickered instead. We continued down the street, somehow avoiding other unwelcome encounters, meandering toward the western residential section where I lived. I tugged at his arm when my house came into view, shushing him loudly.

  “My mother’s in there,” I hissed.

  “Isn’t she asleep?”

  I hit him on the arm with a breathy giggle. “She is!”

  “Then let’s go!”

  “Go where?”

  “To your home. I want to see it.”

  I took his hand and dug my heels into the ground to keep him from moving forward. “No. Saadi, no!”

  “Just show me quick and then I’ll leave. I promise.”

  His blue eyes glistened with curiosity, robbing me of both the desire and strength to resist, and I relented. He followed me onto the property and we crept along the side of the house until we came to the sturdy oak that had twice enabled me to escape.

  “That’s my bedroom window,” I whispered, pointing straight up, and he redirected my finger. “I sleep there.”

  Saadi wasn’t surprised by this revelation. I went over to the tree, needing a boost from him to get into it. Given his height, he had no difficulty pulling up behind me, which proved to be a good idea. I would surely have lost my balance swinging my leg through the window had he not steadied me.

  “We made it.” He chortled, pulling himself inside. “I believe that’s cause for celebration.”

  He handed me his flask, and I poured wine into my mouth, feeling some of it dribble down my chin. I fell upon the bed, holding the drink out to him, and he drained it, landing beside me when he tipped his head too far back.

  “Do you want to know something, Shaselle?”

  “If you want me to know something.” I giggled. He was very funny.

  He took a breath, then proclaimed, “Lady Shaselle of Hytanica, I am in love with you.”

  I burst into laughter, pulling my legs up to ease my aching stomach muscles. He rolled onto his side to look at me, propping his head up with his hand.

  “I’m serious,” he insisted, grinning foolishly at me.

  “You’re drunk.”

  “True, but even drunks can be in love.”

  “But that’s just stupid!”

  “Being in love with you is stupid?”

  “Well, yes!”

  “Why?” he demanded.

  I mirrored his position, then met his shining eyes. “Because you’re Cokyrian! And no matter what, Cokyrians have to pay.”

  “How’s that?”

  “You’re going to die,” I declared, poking him in the chest. “You know that dagger I had? It wasn’t my papa’s! There are weapons to kill all you Cokyrians right here in my house—in everybody’s houses.” I made a sweeping motion with my arm, falling once more onto my back. “That’s what you get for putting us in charge of the recon…recontract…rebuilding.”

  Saadi pushed himself upright, no longer smiling, and I reviewed my words. What had I said? Panic shot through me, for I had confessed our great secret. He stumbled to his feet, and I tried to follow him, becoming entangled in the bedcovers.

  “No, wait,” I called, for he was headed for the window. “Saadi, come back!”

  Freeing myself, I reached for him, wrapping my arms around his waist before he could climb out. He twisted and tried to push me away, but I clung to his arm, refusing to let him shake me off.

  “Shaselle, let go!” he ordered.

  “Saadi, you can’t tell anyone! You have to promise!”

  “I promise I won’t get you in trouble,” he mumbled. Satisfied, I released him, and he ducked through the window and out onto the tree branch.

  It took me a moment to realize he hadn’t made the promise I’d asked for. In my altered state, I couldn’t wrap my mind around what he might do with the information, but the fact that he knew something he shouldn’t cut through the fog in my head like a beacon.

  “Saadi!” I cried. “If you really love me, swear you won’t tell!”

  He twisted around to say something, but lost his balance in the process. The crack of tree branches accompanied his fall, then his body hit the ground with a sickening thud. I sucked in air and held my breath, listening for him to rise, then leaned out the window.

  “Saadi?” I whispered, my chest squeezing my heart. I jumped when his disembodied voice responded, for I could not see him in the dark.

  “I promise, Shaselle. I won’t tell anyone.”

  Relief flowed through me, then I realized how strained he sounded.

  “Are you hurt?”

  “No, I’m fine.”

  He didn’t sound fine. “I’m coming down.”

  “No, don’t. Just stay there. If I fell, it’s definitely too dangerous for you to be climbing.”

  “Are you sure you’re not hurt?” I looked out once more, unnerved that I could not see for myself.

  “Just a little bruised. Now go to bed and sleep off the wine.”

  “Saadi? It’s been a really good night. Thank you.”

  “I know. Just don’t worry and go to bed.”

  “But Saadi? Is it okay if I love you, too?”

  “It’s definitely okay. But see how you feel when you’re sober.”

  I closed the window and moved back to my bed, lying down without changing into my nightgown, for the room was spinning. I shut my eyes, which did little to stop the sensation, and let myself spiral down into a black sleep.

  * * *

  The first thing I did in the morning was retch on the floor beside my bed. My head throbbed, my entire body ached and my mouth was cottony. The smell of my vomit caused another wave of nausea, and I fought it back with all my strength, easing myself down on the bed and throwing an arm over my eyes.

  The events of the previous night were unclear, like bits of a strange dream; with the pounding in my temples, I wasn’t inclined to push too hard to remember. But despite my haze, I had an uneasy feeling that something important had happened, something I needed to recall. I groaned, pressing my palms against my forehead, trying to keep it from cracking open. As memories surfaced, I lumbered to my feet, gasping from the pain the movement wrought. I couldn’t have. I shouldn’t have. Yet I had told the enemy about the weapons. Stepping around the mess I’d made on the floor, I stumbled through my bedroom door, my sickness suddenly irrelevant.

  I rushed down the stairs, the adrenaline that was pumping through my system helping to calm my headache. No one was about. That was good. I rushed out the front door and into the barn.

  It was still early—perhaps early enough to catch Cannan at his manor house. I grabbed a bridle from the tack room and hastily fastened it on Alcander, our steadiest mount, then scrambled onto his back, not bothering with a saddle. I had to tel
l someone what I’d done; perhaps there was time to fix things, some way to make sure Saadi didn’t break his promise. I didn’t want to think about what that might be, but Hytanica was more important than any Cokyrian, no matter how cute and freckled he was.

  Traffic on the streets was thick and maddening as people rose to do chores and shopkeepers prepared for the day’s business. Even though my uncle’s residence was not far from ours, the ride felt interminable. When I at last arrived, I urged my horse past the hitching post and right up the walk. Before I even slid from the gelding’s back, Cannan stepped over the threshold, and I wondered if my mounted appearance at the door had set the servants buzzing.

  The captain ushered me inside and down the corridor to his office, not a place miscreants wanted to find themselves. Steldor and Galen had received a good many lectures here; I had received a few as well, on those occasions when I had tagged along with them and gotten into trouble for my devotion.

  Cannan closed the door and turned to me, my unconventional arrival having put him on full alert.

  “What is it?”

  “I’m so sorry,” I fumbled, trying not to cry. “I’m so sorry, Uncle.”

  He didn’t have patience for my apologies. “What is it?”

  “I… I…” Staring into his dark and forceful eyes, the coward in me took control.

  “I was followed home last night. By a Cokyrian. I’m sorry, but I revisited the weapons stash, and…he saw me. He knows.”

  Cannan’s jaw tightened. “Do you know who it was?”

  “His name is… I—I’m not sure of his name, but it’s the officer you talked to after I was arrested.”

  “Stay here,” Cannan ordered, then he stormed out the door.

  I huddled in my uncle’s office for a few more minutes, then thought I would find a place to lie down. Regrettably, my aunt, Baroness Faramay, was sitting in the sunroom off the foyer. She was surprised to see me, and immediately asked that I join her, which was the last thing I wanted to do. Following the death of Steldor’s younger brother in his infancy, she had suffered a breakdown from which she had never recovered. In the aftermath, she had become simpering, needy and dull; she also clung to my cousin beyond reason. If there was one woman in this world my own mother could not stand, it was Faramay. If there was one person who could make my illness worse, it was Faramay.

  Thankfully, the baroness noticed my pallor after a short conversation, and left to request some soup from the cook. I took the opportunity to steal out the back door into the garden and vomit in some lovely flowers, for the churning in my stomach was even worse than when I’d awoken. When Faramay came to find me, she put me to bed in the guest room, suspecting I had the same illness her son sometimes caught. I couldn’t hide a smirk at her assessment, but she didn’t seem to notice. She decided she would sit with me and read, and though I was unremittingly fretful, her taste in literature was enough to put me to sleep.

  I roused to the sound of my uncle’s voice. “Faramay, would you leave us?”

  Blearily I opened my eyes to find that the sun had shifted position and now shone through the western window, lighting up Cannan’s shape in the doorway. Faramay stepped by him into the hall, and he softly closed the door, moving to take up the chair his wife had vacated.

  “We were lucky,” he said simply, and I waited in confusion for him to elaborate. “The soldier you mentioned—Saadi—died last night. Apparently before he told anyone what he saw.”

  I stopped breathing altogether, staring at Cannan, feeling my heart shatter. If I could have willed it, my body would have shattered as well, into a thousand painful shards.

  “How?” I croaked, hoping Cannan would attribute the tightness of my voice to my sleep.

  “Internal bleeding—I would guess a run-in with someone who did not enjoy his company.”

  “Oh,” I whispered, casting my gaze downward. I wanted to close my eyes, to black out this horrible world, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t stop staring…at my hands, at the bedspread, at the floor, all so normal. And yet, here was my uncle, telling me Saadi was dead. And not knowing, not having any idea what had happened, what had truly happened. This could not be real.

  “Shaselle,” Cannan murmured, and I thought for one terrifying moment that he had read my thoughts. I raised my head, wide-eyed and unblinking. “Forget what you know. Never look at the weapons again. While nothing disastrous came of this incident, it should prove to you that it is not your place to be involved.”

  The chair groaned as he came to his feet. “Faramay tells me you’re unwell. I’ve sent word to your mother. Get some rest.”

  Then he was gone and I was alone. I rolled onto my side, my hands cold and shaking. The sun was dropping lower and lower, and I was terrified of the darkness that would soon descend. The darkness that would claim me, because it matched the void inside of me. I felt corpselike, then slowly became aware of a warm trickle on my face, the only warmth I could feel. Tears.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE:

  AN INQUEST

  ALERA

  I didn’t know what had ignited our passion, but with my hands in Narian’s hair and our mouths moving together, I was rapidly losing my ability to think. It was afternoon, and we were in my study, the door closed but not locked, and anyone, Cokyrian or Hytanican, could walk in at any moment.

  Narian lifted me and set me on my desk, knocking a few papers to the floor, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. I laughed through our kiss until he was forced to come up for air.

  “What?” he asked, cheeks flushed, his visage happy and dazed.

  “What are we doing?”

  “I don’t know, but I’m enjoying it,” he said, caressing my neck with his lips.

  Despite how difficult he was making it for me to form words, I stuttered out a halfhearted objection. “Narian, you realize…we’re going to be caught.”

  He was breathing heavily and took a moment to answer, too busy concentrating on the hollow of my throat. “Somehow…I can’t bring myself…to care.”

  Still grasping his hair, I pulled his head back, kissing him once more fully on the lips. “That’s a new attitude you’ve adopted.”

  He laughed. “The High Priestess and Rava appear to know we’re in love, so even if we’re discovered, it won’t be much of a shock to the powers that be.”

  Despite his words, he practically leaped away from me when the door opened. I crossed my legs, giving him a sideways glare for leaving me sitting rather inappropriately on the edge of my desk, and he rubbed the back of his neck in sheepish apology.

  Of course it was Rava crossing the threshold, and she took in our postures before slamming the door, her expression particularly unpleasant.

  “So this is how the two of you handle the affairs of the province,” she growled.

  “What is it, Rava?” Narian asked, crossing his arms.

  The Cokyrian second-in-command was pacing across the front of my study, unusually agitated. “I assume you heard about the murder last night.”

  Despite her rude entrance and the awkward circumstances in which we found ourselves, she had our attention. I slipped off my desk to stand beside Narian.

  “What murder?” he inquired, and I held my breath in anticipation of her answer. For Rava to be this upset, the victim had to be someone of significance within the Cokyrian forces.

  “The murder of my brother.”

  My hand went to my mouth in shock, while Na
rian’s eyes grayed with both sadness and concern. Saadi’s reputation among the Hytanicans was better than most. What could have happened in the night to bring about such a disastrous consequence?

  “Rava, I’m so sorry,” I murmured, sympathy washing over me. Even Rava could feel loss.

  “And you should be!” she rumbled, bestial in her ferocity. “Hytanicans are responsible for this. Saadi was ambushed and killed by your people. He never even had a chance to draw his sword.”

  “Tell me what you know,” Narian calmly requested, not appreciating her attack against me, but understanding her anger.

  “He was found this morning. Broken, bloody, bruised. He was assaulted during the night.”

  “And the responsible parties—they’re in custody?”

  “Of course not!”

  Rava was tense, enraged, and I thought back to when Miranna had been abducted. The ache, the fear, the grief… Just a couple of days ago Rava had threatened my life, but now I fervently wished her peace.

  “We must hunt them down,” she went on. “We must find whoever did this and make them pay. And if we cannot find them, then every Hytanican in this godforsaken city must pay.”

  “Rava, I’m sorry for your loss,” Narian said, trying to pacify her. “And I will see that everything that can be done is done. But have we any proof that Saadi didn’t die from some sort of accident?”

  “No,” she admitted, straightening her spine and glaring at her commander, as though she’d predicted that he would not act. “Not by your standards. But I know. I know in my gut how my brother died.”

  Narian glanced at me, his eyes troubled. His second-in-command was not in her right mind.

  “I will handle this,” he told her.

  Rava snatched a vase from atop my mantelpiece and hurled it to the floor. It exploded, spraying glass everywhere, and I muffled a shriek.

 

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