“It’s on fire!” he squeaks as if he’s going through puberty again. “We can’t go in there.”
“We already did. Me and Felecia, right after I decided it was too dangerous. She ran in, I went after her. I seem to remember you saying you would have protected her, you should have been by her side, not me. Well, here’s your chance to prove it.”
“Dude, are you not seeing what I am?” he shouts, picking his way over disfigured corpses and random body parts. “There is no way in hell anyone is alive in there.”
“I know Neil, I know that. We’re here to retrieve her body. That’s all. The floor gave out. She’s gonna be in the basement.”
“How the fuck are we supposed to get down there?” he asks like a whining little bitch as we draw closer to what remains of the building. He does have a valid point. How are we going to get down there?
“We’re gonna need rope. We’ll tie off on that lamppost and one of us will lower the other one down. We’ll have to wait for some more of the flames to die. If the rain holds up like this, I don’t know, maybe it’ll go out.”
“Yeah, that’s not how it works dumbass. The rain won’t put out the fire, it might stop it from growing but it’s not going to extinguish it. It won’t stop burning until there’s nothing left to burn.”
“Trust me, the rain’s helping. I just came from here, the flames were bigger before. We just gotta give it time.”
“I’m not waiting around to bring back a burnt body Noah. This is stupid. I only came because I thought there was a chance she’d be alive. I didn’t know the fire would be like this. Come on, let’s get out of here.”
I ignore him and peer down into the fiery abyss. I don’t care what he says, the flames are dying out. The rain is falling through the shattered windows, blown sideways by the wind, the problem is it’s creating even more smoke. I can barely see anything. How am I supposed to tell if she’s down there?
“Noah, let’s go,” he yells over the pouring rain.
“Not until we find her.”
“Okay, what in the actual fuck dude, what was going on between you two? Aren’t you with Caylee?”
“There was nothing going on between us.”
“Bullshit!” he shouts, loud enough to blow any raindrops near his mouth in the other direction. “From the moment you two left the school, something was up. And don’t tell me I’m seeing things because I’m not. You were fucking her, weren’t you?”
“Fucking her? Neil, do you not realize what’s going on out here? We’re in the middle of a zombie fucking apocalypse! When exactly would I have time to– you know what, no, I wasn’t sleeping with her. Just like I’m not sleeping with Caylee. Maybe you’re too simple to get it but sex doesn’t make a relationship.”
“You were in love with her?” he whispers but I can still hear it.
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“It matters. It matters because, fuck, I don’t know why I’m telling you this. It matters because when I made her sit in the back with me, she told me she could never love me. She couldn’t love me because I wasn’t you. I wasn’t you Noah. She was in love with you. I told her how much of a pussy you were, how you couldn’t protect her because when we’d go hunting you couldn’t even hit an animal. She smiled and said that only made her love you more. No matter what I said or did, it didn’t matter because I wasn’t you. Like what the fuck man, what makes you so much better than me? No, don’t even, don’t answer that. Fuck me,” he roars, leaning against the nearby lamppost.
“She said that?”
“I get it. I know why she loved you and not me but Jesus fucking Christ, dude, how are you so calm through all of this? Some of the shit I’ve seen you do, if I were a chick I’d probably have a wide-on over you too. How do you do it Noah? You shoulda been dead twenty times by now but no, you manage to survive, save everyone else and then give some bullshit speech about it. I see why she was in love with you, I get it, but how the fuck do you do it? I’m over here freaking out and you’re Mr. Cool, here to save the day, yet again. Like bro, maybe you could share some of the spotlight. Do you really need all the girls to be in love with you? What did you say to her to make her fall so hard? Because I said all the right things and she’d just look at me and say you’re not him. What did you tell her Noah?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It does. I need to know what makes you so much better than me.”
“Neil, it doesn’t matter.”
He begins to protest again but stops when he sees my finger pointing into the smoke filled basement, illuminated by large pockets of fire the rain isn’t strong enough to put out. He sees her. He sees her body beside a display case smashed to bits. Her charred remains are staring at us through lifeless eyes, still fighting over her even when she’s gone.
CHAPTER 20
There isn’t much left of her. I don’t know if it’s even worth going down there to claim her remains. Strands of blonde hair are visible. The ugly muumuu she somehow made desirable isn’t even recognizable, it’s been reduced to nothing but ash. The charred body barely resembles a body but it’s her. There were only two people in the store and I know it isn’t me down there.
“I’m gonna be sick,” he groans, turning around and puking all over his shoes. I know the feeling, I want to do it too. I thought, I don’t know, I thought maybe, somehow she might have survived.
“I can’t do this,” I say to myself but I think it might have been out loud. Yep, I can tell by the way Neil tilts his head toward me, spitting out the last of it. “I can’t get back on that bus, not without her. You gotta tell them I didn’t make it.”
“What? Are you crazy? Noah, I can’t leave you out here.”
“You didn’t seem to have a problem doing it before.” There’s no forgiveness or sympathy in my tone, only a cold hostility that blows through the windy rain.
“You can’t make it out here alone,” he says with a vehement shake of his head.
“Not really sure I plan to.”
“Noah man, come on, let’s just go back.”
“I’m not getting on that bus with your dad.”
The confused look he gives me almost seems genuine.
“Don’t look at me like that, you know damn well your father’s lost it. Even more than you. He’s a despicable human being on his best day and these are certainly not his best days. He’s a fucking psycho and you know it. I saw the way he treated you.”
“I know,” he says, staring at his vomit covered shoes with his one good eye. “I feel like maybe we shouldn’t have rescued him. Did I make a mistake?”
“One that’s probably going to cost you your life.”
He remains in puking position, bent over, hands on his knees, his whole body heaving as he tries to stop himself from having a panic attack. “What the hell did I do? I thought he was going to get us to safety somehow. He’s my dad, you know? I figured he’d have some magic answer that would kick these things asses. But he doesn’t. He’s just as confused and helpless as any of us. I mean, we had to get him out of that building. They couldn’t have done that on their own? They had to have a bunch of kids save them? What kind of pathetic bullshit is that? I didn’t know he’d be there,” he says, finally cocking his head to the side to look at me. “He never mentioned your dad was there, or the other two. For what it’s worth, your dad’s a spineless tool. I know you guys don’t get along, or even talk anymore, but–”
“How do you know about that?”
“Hunting. Guy talk. I’m not gonna lie, I would laugh when he’d rag on you about being a pussy and everything. But Noah, they don’t know a god damn thing. You are literally the furthest thing from a pussy I could ever imagine.”
“Are you, Neil, are you calling me a dick?” I ask with a grin.
He smiles and shakes his head because laughing would make him throw up again. “You’re more of a man than anyone on that bus. And she knew it,” he says, pointing to Felecia’s remains. “She saw it
before any of us, and if she died loving you, standing by your side, knowing you loved her too, that’s how she wanted to go. I know because she told me. You deserved to have her heart, not me. I’m sorry,” he whispers because sorry isn’t something he says out loud, he’s a Buckley. “Sorry for everything.”
He stands up and extends his hand for me to shake. I stare at it for a long time before finally giving in. He’s done some seriously messed up shit over the course of our lives. Over the course of the past day and a half. But in this world we’re in, it’s better to have friends than enemies. So I put aside what he’s done to me as he puts aside the things I’ve done to him, and in the rain with fire raging around us, dead bodies lining the streets to the point you can barely tell there’s a street there, we shake hands. Mortal enemies putting aside their differences. Maybe it’s because Felecia’s gone, our competition to win her heart is over, but I’m glad we’ve found a way to put the past aside. Despite the circumstances.
“Let’s get her out of there,” he sighs, “and then figure out a way to get my dad off that bus.”
“So you can be in charge again?”
He looks down at the gun he hasn’t let go of in who knows how long, shakes his head, and hands it to me. I accept it with my injured hand, fully expecting this to be a setup but he doesn’t take advantage of my weakened state.
“I was born to lead,” he says with a shake of his head. “My dad wouldn’t let me be anything else. I’ve always been a leader. And I’ve always been one step behind you. He forced you off the track team, didn’t he?” I nod and he continues. “Hunting, you missed every animal you aimed at, but you um, you weren’t aiming at the animals, were you?” he asks, rubbing his hand over his head.
“I wasn’t.”
“Eighth grade dance. I went with Felecia. I always said it was because obviously she’d pick me over you but you know the real reason why she bailed on you?”
“Why?”
“Because her mom said if you’re not gonna go with someone worth going with, you’re not going at all. Her mom made her go with me. It’s not because she liked me more, and I hated you because of it. I swear to god, she spent the whole night staring at you and it seriously sucked balls. She finally left me to go dance with you, despite the fact that her mother was chaperoning the thing, but Michelle got to you first. Even back then she knew you were the man. If you say we wait until the evacuation center is set up, then we wait.”
I never knew. After all these years, I never knew why she asked me out only to laugh in my face the next day. I always thought it was because she was a bitch and that’s what bitches do. But it was her mom the whole time. I didn’t know she was going to dance with me. I saw her walking over, alone, the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I thought she was going to embarrass me again so I was beyond grateful when Michelle, the hottest thing since Felecia, not to mention her sworn enemy, came from out of nowhere and rescued me. She wasn’t rescuing me, she knew what Felecia was coming to do, she was stealing me. And I let her. What would have happened if she hadn’t intervened? Would we have left that night as a couple?
The what-ifs are killing me so I do the only thing I can do and start walking. Neil follows without question. I think he knows we’re trying to find a way to the other side of the buildings where we can lower ourselves down and retrieve what’s left of the girl we’ve both been in love with for the past three years. The narrow alleys have been destroyed, we’ll have to take the long way around.
You know what, he needs this more than I do. I hand him his gun without looking back. Call me crazy but I believe him. Or maybe I just don’t care if he shoots me. I thought learning the truth would help but it doesn’t. There isn’t much worse than knowing what could have been, and knowing it can never be.
What’s that? Footsteps? Someone’s coming around the corner. Multiple someones. The sickly groans solidify it. We have guests.
I wait until the first one makes his appearance, hoping by some miracle it’s actually people but no, of course not. It’s only more of these bastards. Is there no one left? How have we not run into any actual living, breathing, humans? They can’t all be dead. There has to be someone left. Someone other than Joseph Buckley and his suit wearing yes-men.
I drop to one knee and use both hands to swing the spiked ball at our first guest’s stomach. If I use both hands, it hurts my right wrist a little less. The morningstar tears through his flesh, sending a stream of blood and skin squirting into the air, completely opening his stomach to the outside world. The fatal injury doesn’t faze him. He doesn’t care that his insides are spilling all over the sidewalk.
His foot gets tangled in a pile of his own intestines, tripping him up but not enough to take him down. He stumbles forward, bypassing me and going straight for Neil like his pansy ass is more appealing. Personally, I’m a little offended. What does he have that I don’t?
There’s another one a few steps away that I’ll deal with later. At the moment, Neil needs me. I can’t believe I’m actually taking pity on his sorry ass but after the things he said, I can’t leave him frozen in fear with a disemboweled demon of hell heading straight for him.
I slam my foot down on the string of intestines trailing behind him. They squish beneath my heel like stomping on a giant slug while barefoot. I swear I can feel the slimy texture through my shoe.
He takes another couple steps before he reaches the end of the line. Something rips from his chest and smacks off the wet concrete, causing the creature to spin around like I yanked his leash too hard. He crashes to the sidewalk, exposing his open chest cavity. He doesn’t seem to notice or care that his body is empty. Even if he was to take a bite of my mortal enemy turned ally, there’d be nowhere for it to go. He’d swallow and a couple seconds later it would fall out of his ribs.
He tries to scramble to his feet but his torso collapses in on itself, his spinal cord must have cracked without his stomach there to hold him together. I can sense the one running up behind me and spin around, slashing her throat with the morningstar. Half of her neck explodes in a burst of crimson, knocking her from her feet and into the slimy, blood filled puddles. The sight of the throat-less middle aged woman makes me cringe. She looks a little like my mom. I bring the spikes down across the remnants of her neck in an attempt to put her out of her misery. But it’s not enough.
Her spinal column is still attached. She sits up straight like she’s awakening from a nightmare but the brittle bones of her neck aren’t enough to support her head. Her face disappears. It tips backwards as she stands up. All I see is a headless zombie stumbling to its feet. She turns around in an attempt to see me, not understanding that her head is tipped upside down, resting against her back in the wrong direction. She reaches out her hands and steps forward, which is actually backwards, and I bring the blood coated spikes across her mangled stump of a neck. The force of the blow crunches through the bone, the last shreds of flesh tear away and her head hits the sidewalk. Her body takes a couple more misguided steps before collapsing in a heap at Neil’s feet.
The horrified look on his face tells me he won’t be any help. It’s all gotten to be too much for him. He stands there frozen in fear as a hunched over elderly woman creeps up beside him. The arch in her back tells me she once used a walker before becoming a walker herself. Her movements are slow and choppy like every motion she makes is killing her bones. But it doesn’t stop her. She shows no sign of pain. Only hunger.
I can’t get to him in time. I yell out his name but I can tell by the blank stare it isn’t registering. He’s frozen in fear. I’m not even sure he realizes her arthritic hands have latched onto his arm. He’s just staring into space, mouth trembling. Gone. No matter how fast I run, I won’t reach him in time. They’re at least fifteen feet away. Her face is fifteen inches. She arches her neck back and spreads her jaws as wide as they’ll go, a wild animal going in for the kill.
I scream his name again but he doesn’t snap out of it.
I do the only thing I can to save him and throw the morningstar at the decrepit woman’s head. It connects. The spikes disappear into her skull, sending chunks of flesh and possibly an ear into the air. It knocks her off balance but it isn’t enough. She lowers her mouth to Neil’s arm and latches on.
CHAPTER 21
I’m too late.
He finally notices what’s going on and tries to pull away but she’s got a good grip on him. Her mouth is clamped down on his forearm, a pus colored saliva oozes from the wound. In a minute or so he’ll turn and I’ll be forced to put him out of his misery. At least he’s got a gun so it’ll be quick.
As he struggles to get the old woman off him, I realize I can’t go back. Not without Neil. His father will shoot me on sight. He won’t know I did everything I could to save him, just like I did Felecia, but sometimes our best isn’t enough. We beat ourselves up afterward, replaying the moment in our heads and we convince ourselves there was more we could have done. But there wasn’t. I know that. His father won’t. And he’ll shoot me. No, I can’t go back. Not anymore.
Caylee. What’s Caylee going to think? When I don’t return, she’ll come limping after me, trying to find me. Trying to help because that’s who she is. Why couldn’t I have just chosen her, not thought about Felecia and devoted myself to the amazing girl who’s still on the bus, praying for me to come back safely? I’ll leave her a note. I don’t know how, it’s raining, but I’ll find a way. Maybe I can scrawl something across a building to let her know what happened. To let her know I’m okay. But how long will I be okay?
A gunshot snaps me out of it. Neil. He’s shooting at her face. I look up in time to see the second shot. Skull fragments explode into the air in a sea of blood and brain matter but she just keeps biting. Does he know it’s not going to do any good? That even if he kills her, shooting until there’s nothing left to bite him, that it won’t matter? He’s already been bitten.
Blood Type Infected (Book 2): Fallen To The Flame Page 12
