by Ella Edon
“I think we can manage for now, thank you, Lord Tiverton.” Lee stepped past Alexander. “You’re supposed to be back at the house, My Lord. You shouldn’t be out here.”
“I need something to do, My Lord.”
“You’re not going to try and shut us up after Victor Reyes’ accusations about you, are you?” Alexander asked.
Lord Tiverton sighed. “Look, I’ve already told you that I wasn’t the one who wrote to Miss Reyes. And I certainly didn’t seduce her.”
“How can we be sure about that?”
“Because…” Lord Tiverton glanced towards the house, a flash of pain in his eyes. “Because there was only one woman in my life, and I wouldn’t betray her by having an affair with someone else.”
Alexander glanced at Lee. As far as they were aware, Lord Tiverton had never married. Even though he was the heir, he was still unmarried with no children of his own. Lord and Lady Crawley didn’t seem to be the type of people who would let their eldest son go this long without marrying and having children.
Then it clicked. They had been reading about it for the last few hours. Alexander groaned.
“Oh, God. We’re thick-headed fools, Lee.”
“What?”
“The man Megan wrote about in her diaries. Tony.” Alexander fixed a glare on Lord Malcolm. “Short for Anthony.”
He expected him to deny it, but instead Lord Tiverton’s shoulders slumped as he stared at the floor. Then he moved over to a wooden bench against the wall of the house and slumped down heavily. He looked like the fight had gone out of him.
Lee stared. “You and Miss White were lovers?”
“We were. I met her when she first arrived here. I was nineteen, she was seventeen. We were both young and... we ended up exploring it. We fell in love pretty quickly.” Anthony rubbed a hand over his face. “But we knew we could never marry. Father would never allow it. And with Judith’s illicit pregnancy and death a few years later...it killed me that I couldn’t openly declare my love for Megan and I couldn’t make her my wife, but she understood. She said as long as she had me and I didn’t desert her, she would love me regardless.” Anthony looked up, and Alexander saw tears in his eyes. “I never betrayed her trust. She stayed with me, even after we realized I couldn’t father children. Megan was a remarkable woman.”
Alexander felt some pity for the Crawley heir. He had been with a woman for thirty years and wasn’t able to declare to the world that she was his. Their devotion to each other in spite of that was remarkable.
He reached the bench and sat beside Anthony, who was taking a handkerchief out of his pocket.
“Forgive me.” Anthony rubbed at his eyes with the handkerchief. “Knowing that Megan’s dead and not being able to properly grieve has been very difficult.”
“We understand.” Alexander glanced at Lee. “When was the last time you saw her?”
“The night before she disappeared. Nearly two weeks ago. We spent the night together.”
“And did you find anything odd at the time?”
“Not really. And when she left the next evening, I didn’t think anything of it. Women can’t control when they’re going to give birth, and Megan would often have to leave immediately. We would snatch moments together whenever we could.” Anthony paused. “I think she wanted to tell me something, though.”
“What makes you say that?” Lee asked.
“She was...I can’t quite describe it, but something wasn’t right. She did start telling me something, only to stop and say it didn’t matter. That it could wait. I was going to ask her about it when she got back.” Anthony’s voice broke a little. “I should have pushed her about it that night. Then maybe she would still be alive.”
“We don’t know that yet,” Alexander pointed out. “There’s a good chance you might have ended up becoming another victim as well.”
“Or maybe I could have kept Megan alive.”
Alexander glanced at Lee, who gave him a silent nod. He was letting Alexander take the lead. Alexander turned back to Anthony, who was staring at the ground with a miserable expression.
“Did you know she was dying?”
“What?” Anthony’s head snapped up. “Dying?”
“She had consumption. She didn’t have long.”
Anthony’s mouth opened and closed. His face had gone pale.
“She had been unwell recently. It explains the weight loss, but she never said anything about consumption. She...she never said.” Anthony slumped over, burying his face in his hands. “I loved her. If I had been able to marry her, I would have done so a long time ago. I would…”
His voice broke off, and Alexander could hear him quietly sobbing. Alexander couldn’t begin to imagine how it felt to mourn someone and you couldn’t say a word about it.
Alexander didn’t know what to do except pat the man’s shoulder. After a while, Anthony lowered his hands and took a deep breath.
“Forgive me. I didn’t mean to get so emotional.”
“You were forgiven before you became emotional.” Alexander stood. “Come with us. Let’s get you a drink.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jane sat in her room. She had forced Claire to leave before drawing the curtains and curling up in her bed. She didn’t want to be disturbed by anyone or have anyone with her.
She just wanted to be left alone.
Alexander couldn’t seriously believe that her sister was actually her mother? Jane had seen a rare portrait of Judith and they did look pretty similar, but they were sisters. They were supposed to look similar. And her parents were of the age where they could be her grandparents, but Jane was Lady Crawley’s daughter.
He had to be wrong. But what did he gain from telling her? Was he trying to split the family down the middle? It didn’t make any sense. Jane was confused, angry and alone. Very alone. She didn’t know what to think anymore after that.
She had to find her father. Once Jane had composed herself again, she needed to approach Lord Crawley and demand the truth. Her father wouldn’t lie to her? Would he? If he really was her grandfather, he had been lying to her for twenty years.
Alexander had just made this all a complete mess.
There was a knock at the door. Jane ignored it, burrowing down into her bedding. Then there was another knock. Jane groaned.
“Go away!”
But the door opened. It closed a moment later, and Jane heard a familiar voice.
“Jane, it’s me.”
Jane sat up. “Anthony? What are you doing in here?”
“I came to see how you were.” Anthony crossed the room. “Claire said you had practically thrown her out and refused to let anyone in.”
He neared the bed, and Jane could just about see her brother’s face. Her uncle’s face. Jane didn’t know what to call him anymore. She was shocked to see dirty marks on his face. His eyes looked sore. She frowned.
“Have you been crying, Anthony?”
“Hmm? No, of course not.” Anthony rubbed at his eye. “I just got something in my eye and it was a little painful.”
“You look like you’ve been crying.”
“I didn’t come in here to discuss me.” Anthony sat on the edge of the bed. “What’s wrong? Mother’s worried about you. You screamed at her to get out when she tried to come in earlier.”
“I didn’t want to see her.” Jane drew her legs up and wrapped her arms around her knees. “I didn’t know what I was going to say to her.”
“Say what?”
Here it came. At least Anthony would be able to tell her if she was being a fool.
“Alexander Harrison. He...he told me something...it just doesn’t sound believable. I don’t know what to think anymore.”
Anthony looked bewildered. Then his expression cleared. “Ah. I see. He told you about your real mother.”
“What?” Jane stared at him. “How did…?”
“I told him. Well, he already suspected something, but I confirmed it for him.”
“Wh...bu...why didn’t you tell me?”
“Father swore us all to secrecy. He didn’t want anyone to know that Judith had an affair and had gotten pregnant.” Anthony swallowed. “You weren’t supposed to know about it.”
“Ever?”
“More than likely.”
Jane glared at him. “I wish you had told me, Anthony. I had a right to know!”
“Would you have reacted any differently if I had told you?” Anthony countered. “Harrison told you because he thought you deserved to know. He didn’t want you to feel betrayed by him that he knew about it and never said a word.”
Jane faltered. Alexander had said as much earlier. He felt guilty for keeping it from her but telling her had only just made things worse.
“Jane.” Anthony laid a hand on her shoulder. “The gentleman loves you. I didn’t think a rake like him could be capable of that, but he does love you.”
“But we barely know each other.”
“He knows enough about you to make up his own mind. And your welfare is important to him.” Anthony gave her a slight smile. Was there a tinge of sadness in his eyes? “He’s done so much for you when he didn’t need to. That’s very telling to me.”
“I…” Jane hadn’t heard Anthony speak like that before. This was probably the most substantial conversation the two of them had ever had. She swallowed. “I don’t know what to say to that.”
“Don’t say anything for now.” Anthony said gently. “Just answer me this: are you in love with him?”
“Yes.”
Jane didn’t even need to think about it. She was certain. Anthony was silent for a moment. Then he shifted closer, putting his arms around her as he hugged her tightly. He kissed her head and then released her.
“Mr. Harrison is in the library. He wanted to see you but didn’t think you wanted to speak to him. I said I would see what you wanted.”
Again, Jane didn’t need to think. She scrambled off the bed and dusted herself down, checking her hair.
“How do I look?”
“You look presentable.” Anthony chuckled.
Jane stuck her tongue out at him. Then she approached her brother - uncle, she remembered - and hugged him, kissing his cheek.
“I love you, Anthony. You’re a bastard, but I still love you.”
Anthony smiled and chucked her chin. “And I love you, brat. Off you go. Your gentleman is waiting for you.”
* * *
Alexander had wanted to go up to Jane’s room, but Anthony told him that would be a bad idea. Instead, he had to accept Anthony’s suggestion that he went up to talk to Jane and see if he could get her to meet Alexander in the library.
It had only been five minutes since they returned to the house, but it could well have been five hours. Alexander paced around the library, wishing he could go and find Jane himself. But Malcolm was right; it was best that he tested the waters first, and then they would be able to find out what Jane wanted to do.
Alexander could only hope she wanted to speak to him.
The door opened, and Alexander stilled when Jane stepped into the room. Her hair was down about her shoulders, and her face was pale, but her eyes were clear, and she held her head high. She shut the door behind her, leaning against it as she stared at him. Alexander swallowed.
“Jane?”
Jane didn’t move or respond. Then she ran to him. Alexander opened his arms as Jane flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. Alexander gripped her tightly, burying his face in her neck. It had only been a few hours since he had last seen her, and even longer since he had touched her. It was like satisfying a craving, and something calmed inside him.
Dear God, he really was in trouble.
“I shouldn’t have treated you like that.” Jane’s voice was trembling. “I just...I didn’t know how to react.” She drew back but didn’t move out of his arms. “Can you forgive me?”
“Oh, Jane.” Alexander cupped her head in his hands and kissed her forehead. “I forgave you a long time ago. You don’t need to apologize.”
“Really?”
“Really. It’s a lot to be thrown on you. Anyone in your position would have reacted in the same way. I just…” Alexander stroked her hair, running his fingers through her tresses. She had such soft hair. “I just didn’t want you to find out later on that I knew about your parentage. I didn’t want you to hate me for it.”
“I could never hate you, Alexander.” Jane pressed her hands against his chest with a sigh. “It’s going to take some time for me to fully believe it, though.”
“I understand. And I’m going to help you as much as I can. I promise.” Alexander kissed her temple. “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you again.”
“With your reputation, can you keep a promise like that?”
Alexander paused. Jane looked up at him with an unblinking gaze. His chest tightened at the faith in her eyes.
“I intend to.” He held her close, resting his forehead against hers. “There are a lot of things that have happened to me recently, and all of it involves you. You mean so much to me, Jane. I can’t see myself walking away from you anytime soon.”
“Alexander?” Jane pulled back. “What are you saying?”
“That I love you.” Alexander couldn’t believe how easy it was to say that. He cupped her jaw and kissed her. “I haven’t said that to anyone since Lady Nicole. I can assure you, that I’m not going anywhere. I can’t.” He took her hand and pressed it against his chest over his heart. “You’ve taken a part of me and I’m not going to get it back.”
Jane was staring at him, her eyes widening. Alexander waited. He loved her. Alexander trembled as she cupped his jaw in her small, delicate hand, and leaned into him. Her lips were just brushing against his when the door opened abruptly. Jane started to jump back, but Alexander kept his arms around her. After what he had just declared, he wasn’t about to let her go now.
Robert stood in the doorway, staring in bewilderment at them. Then his eyes narrowed and he scowled. “I don’t think you two should be in here alone, Jane.”
“I haven’t taken advantage of her, Robert.” Alexander shot back.
Robert snorted. “I would believe that if you weren’t holding her.”
Alexander was a little confused by Robert Malcolm’s response. He had been the laidback, nicer one of the brothers. Now he was acting like someone else. It was like the gentleman Alexander had initially met wasn’t there anymore. What was with the sudden change in his attitude towards Alexander?
“Anthony told me to meet Alexander here, Robert,” Jane protested. “We’re not doing anything wrong.”
“I beg to differ,” Robert grunted. “I’m going to be having words with Anthony about leaving you two alone, not that you should be in the same room.” He beckoned Jane towards him. “I suggest you go to Mother, Jane, and sit with her. She needs some company right now.”
“Mother?” Jane shot back. “You mean Grandmother, don’t you?”
Robert’s eyes widened. He snapped his gaze to Alexander, who shrugged.
“She had to be told. I’m not going to lie to her.”
Robert’s jaw tightened. His hands clenched at his sides. “Keep calling her Mother, Jane. She doesn’t need to know that you’ve found out.”
“I won’t. Yet.” Jane turned to Alexander, giving him a small smile. “Will you let me know what you find?”
“Of course.”
Alexander allowed Jane to kiss him, very aware of Robert watching them closely. That was what stopped him from pulling her back into his embrace. Jane stepped back, giving him a smile that made Alexander feel like someone had lit a fire in his belly, and headed towards the door. She stepped around her brother, who was still scowling, and left the room. As the door closed behind her, Robert swung around on Alexander.
&nb
sp; “Why did you tell her the truth?” he hissed. “That was not your secret to tell!”
“You don’t think Jane deserved to know the truth about herself?” Alexander folded his arms, matching Robert’s glare with one of his own. “I’m not going to lie to her about that.”
Robert’s lip curled into a snarl. “You might find that you’ve opened up something you wished you had kept closed.”
