He hadn’t said a word, just grabbed my hand and dragged me inside, then he’d shoved down my underwear, pushed me up against the wall, and fucked me.
I loved this new side to him, the side that just acted, that didn’t weigh every action, every word. It was happening more lately.
I found him around the side of the barn, stacking wood. A tree had fallen in one of the fields, and he’d been chopping it up for firewood. He turned to me when I rounded the corner, and my breath seized in my throat. He was wearing jeans and boots and nothing else, the heavy belt buckle he wore tugging the soft denim down at the front, giving me an enticing view. The way the sexy rail of dark hair below his belly button thickened…
His cock hardened behind his zipper, and my eyes darted up to his. They were a little wild, and a lot hungry.
I plastered an innocent smile on my face. “I brought you a drink.”
He didn’t say anything, just walked over, took it from my hand, and chugged the lot. Then he took mine from my hands, set it on the woodpile, and crowded me against the wall. “You can’t look at me like that while I’m working.”
I blinked up at him. “Like what?”
His lips tugged up on one side, and my heart fluttered in my chest. He’d been doing that a lot lately as well. Grins, soft smiles, when he looked at me. I’d made it my mission to make him do it as often as possible.
He slid a hand up my thigh, under my dress. “You know what.”
I sucked in a breath as his hand drifted higher. “Enlighten me.”
He cupped me over my panties, sliding a finger along my slit. “Like you want to drop to your knees and suck me,” he said in that gritty voice.
I was flat-out panting now. “And how is that a problem?”
His eyes drifted shut for a few seconds. He licked his lips. “Darlin’,” he groaned. “I’ve got work to do, and you’re a goddamn distraction.” He nipped my lower lip, then sucked it gently.
“I am?” I gripped his belt buckle; my other hand slid down to his ass and squeezed. “I had no idea.”
“You’re wearing this pretty dress in front of me, knowing I wouldn’t be able to resist putting my hand up under it.” His finger continued to torment me, and I clung to his biceps so my weak knees didn’t give out. “Before…” His breath came out on a shudder. “When I’d only ever dreamed of touching you like this, when we’d take our trips to town…I used to make sure I was there waiting when you walked out the door, just so I could see which one you were wearing, watch the way it would cling to your thighs when you walked toward me, the way it cupped you right here…” He cupped between my thighs more firmly. “I lived for it, angel. Heaven and hell, every damn time I saw you. I think…” His gaze sharpened, and he licked his lips, watching me in an intense way, making sure he didn’t miss my reaction to his next words. “I think you need to be punished for tempting me like this, teasing me when you know I can’t do anything about it until tonight.”
He was still a little wary about this new dynamic between us, worried that he could hurt me or that he might be too rough. I did my best to prove otherwise every chance I got. God only knew why I was doing this right now, when I knew damn well we were expecting a possible new client at any moment. The guy owned a large ranch a couple of hours from here. He’d heard good things about our horses and the way Eli trained them and was looking to buy at least four. It was a big deal, and we both knew it.
But I was wet and achy, and at the mention of punishment, had to snap my thighs together. I couldn’t stop myself from pushing a little more. Dropping my forehead against his chest, I kissed and sucked his bare skin. “What kind of punishment?”
“Abigail.” He gritted his teeth. “I should turn you around, press you into that wall, and fuck the hell out of you for testing me like this.” A second later, I was spun around, facing the steel wall of the barn, and Eli had tugged up my dress. He slammed into me, tugging down my underwear, grinding against me. His lips brushed my ear. “Instead, I’m going to give you a little taste of what you’re getting tonight for teasing me like this.” His weight disappeared, and the sun only had a second to heat the bare skin of my ass before his hand came down on my right cheek.
I cried out in shock. It stung for a second, but then my skin heated deliciously. I drew in a breath to say something, anything, when he did it again, and this time I moaned. “Holy shit.”
He smoothed that hot, rough hand over my throbbing ass. Then his mouth was at my ear again. “I’m going to spank this ass, then I’m going to fuck it. You think about that all day, Abigail, what’s going to happen when our meeting is over and we’re all alone.” Then he pulled up my panties, dropped my dress, and turned me around.
He was still crowding me. I was struggling to breathe through the out-of-control beating of my heart, the pulsing, throbbing beat between my thighs, deep inside me, when he cupped my face and bent down, pressing his lips to mine, and kissed me hard and deep.
“What the fuck?” someone shouted.
Eli pulled away, and I spun toward the voice, wincing when I saw Kyle standing there.
Oh shit.
Our secret would be all over town before the end of the day.
Chapter Ten
“Why is he touching you?” Kyle shouted.
Eli stepped away from me, turning toward him, hard, scary eyes locking on the smaller man.
I stepped forward, in front of Elijah. “What are you doing here, Kyle?”
“I came to see you.” His lips curled. “But instead I find you with this fucking wack job.”
“Don’t say one more damn word…”
“Why?” Kyle snarled. “Because you know it’s true, Abi?”
“No…”
He flung an arm out, motioning to us. “That’s the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. Jesus Christ. Have you fucked that monster? Did you let him put his filthy dick in you?”
I jerked like he’d struck me, anger firing through my veins. “We’re not doing anything wrong,” I yelled back.
“No? Are you serious? Have you lost your mind? He’s a murderer, Abi. He killed someone!”
I shook my head, the denial coming out of my mouth before I knew what I was doing. “It’s not true. None of it.”
“Of course it is!” Eli’s boots scraped as he took a step forward.
I stepped back at the same time, trying to use my body to hold Elijah back. “You’re the only disgusting monster I can see, Kyle Harris. Now get the hell off my ranch.”
“I can’t believe you turned me down for that,” he yelled. “For that…thing.”
“Leave!”
“Someone needs to say something. That monster is liable to murder you in your bed, take a kitchen knife to you like he did his old man.”
I was shaking my head, trembling I was so angry. “You don’t know him. How dare you come to my place and insult him like that.”
“Wait till I tell everyone you’re this psycho’s whore…”
Eli lifted me bodily when that ugly word flew from Kyle’s lips. He placed me out of his path and headed toward Kyle. Kyle’s eyes went wide, and he started backing up.
“Don’t you ever talk about her like that,” Elijah said in a low, terrifying voice. “Ever.”
Before Eli could reach him, Kyle spun and ran to his truck. He tore off down the road a few seconds later.
I stood there, fists clenched at my sides, pulse racing, angrier than I could ever remember being. Dread fired through me. “He’s going to head into town and run his mouth off to anyone who will listen.”
Eli was still staring at the road, back wide and rigid, so still, he looked like a statue. When Kyle’s truck disappeared around the bend, he turned to me.
“Eli…”
“That bothers you?”
I stared back. “What?”
“That Kyle will talk about what he saw here?”
I shook my head. “I don’t want them talking about you like that.”
“Is
that why you said it was a lie, what I did? Why you said we’re not doing anything wrong?” His body was still stiff. “Who are you trying to convince, Abigail? Him or you?”
“No, that’s not it.” I hugged myself tighter, swallowing the lump forming in my throat. “No…the things he was saying about you…I didn’t want them talking about you like that, I didn’t want…”
“I don’t care what they say about me.” He moved in, stopping right in front of me. “I don’t care what Kyle fucking Harris thinks about me. It’s only your opinion that matters.” He crossed his arms. “Why were you standing in front of me?”
I blinked up at him. “I…well, I didn’t want…” I trailed off, not sure how to answer.
“Did you think I’d hurt him?”
“No!”
“So you think I need you to protect me, that I need you to fight my battles, that I’m too weak or brainless to defend myself against a man like that?”
“No.” I shook my head and stepped closer. “Of course not.”
He stepped back, denying me, not letting me touch him. It was the worst kind of punishment he could ever dish out.
“I may not talk much to the folks in town, but that’s because they’re not worth the energy. He isn’t worth the energy. I’m not simple or slow…or goddamn pathetic.”
“I know that…”
“I may not have fucked a woman before you, darlin’, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a man. It doesn’t mean I’m not capable of looking after you the way you need to be looked after.” He planted his hands on his hips, letting out a rough breath. “I sure as fuck don’t need to stand behind my woman when things get ugly.”
My mouth dropped open. “Eli…”
“There was no reason for you to try to justify to that asshole what we were doing.” His eyes locked on mine. “Don’t you trust me?”
“Of course I do.”
I tried to step forward again, but he stopped me with a look. Then, shaking his head, he turned and walked away.
“Elijah, please.”
He stopped a short distance from me but didn’t look back. “I need to cool down.”
How the hell had I messed this up so badly? “I don’t think of you like that. God, Elijah…you’re the strongest man I’ve ever met.”
He stayed rooted to the spot for several long seconds, then strode away.
I wanted to go after him, make him understand, but I wouldn’t be able to, not yet anyway. A truck was heading our way, dust flying out behind it. Our possible new client. This guy could help save the ranch if he liked what he saw, if he wanted to make a deal.
I just hoped I could get through it without falling apart.
…
“I’m looking forward to doing business with you both.”
Mr. Lawrence shook my hand, then Eli’s, clapping him on the shoulder.
I smiled at the older man. “You won’t be disappointed.”
This was good news, the best; he wanted our horses, but I was struggling to find any excitement with Eli still not looking at me.
We walked Mr. Lawrence to his truck. Eli stood close, towering over me. I could feel the heat of his skin radiating from him. I wanted to lean into him desperately, but with the sharp line of his spine, the stiff way he held his shoulders, I knew he was still angry.
I waved to Mr. Lawrence as his truck headed out.
Nerves kicked up in my belly as I dropped my hand and turned to Elijah, but he was already walking away. The nerves turned to nausea. Was he going to take off on his horse again? Did he need another night away from me? God, that stung…so damn much.
Had I ruined everything?
I’d hurt him, and I had no idea how to fix it.
I forced myself to go inside, not sure what else to do, what I could say to him to make this better. If he’d even be willing to listen to me if I tried.
The phone in the kitchen was ringing when I walked in, but it stopped before I reached it. Crap.
Grabbing a glass, I filled it with water and downed the entire thing. My mouth was dry, like I’d been talking nonstop for the last hour, and more than likely I had. But the new buyer liked our horses, and the money we’d make would allow us to keep the ranch afloat. I stared out the window, watching the dry grass sway with the breeze. Eli’s reaction to my defending him was eating at me, mainly because there was some truth to what he said. Not the part about him being a lesser man, and I’d never doubted his intelligence. But the part about Kyle not being worth it? He was right. I’d tried to justify our relationship to that creep. Denying Eli’s past, when I’d never cared if it was true or not, trying to convince Kyle, someone who meant nothing to me, that what we were doing wasn’t wrong? It was as good as admitting to Eli that I felt the opposite.
Shit.
I rubbed my aching eyes and paced the kitchen. I’d let the gossips and busybodies get to me. I hadn’t even realized I’d bought into their crap until those words had tumbled out of my mouth. Not everyone in Deep River was like that. But it was the people with nothing better to do than pass judgment and look down on others who tended to have the loudest voices.
The phone rang again, and I snatched it up. Cassie’s shrill voice blasted my ear. I had no idea what she was saying, but I knew exactly why she was calling. Kyle hadn’t wasted any time. It’d only been a few hours.
“…what do you think you’re doing with that man?” she finished.
I was already angry over what Kyle said, over my own reaction to his words—that I’d managed to hurt Eli. I didn’t need this. Definitely not right then. “I love you, you know I do, Cass. But how is it any of your damn business?”
That shut her up, but only for a few seconds. “We love you, too. We’ve known you since you were a little girl. That’s how it’s our business.”
I shoved my fingers in my hair, pushing it away from my face. “Then you know I’m not stupid or reckless. You’re making assumptions, about me and about Elijah…and you know what, I don’t need to explain my actions to you or any damn person in this town. He’s a good man, he makes me feel special…that’s all you should be worried about. I’m happy, Cassie. That should be enough for you.”
She sighed. “If that’s true, honey, then why did you keep this a secret from me?”
I had my reasons, reasons I believed were good ones. Now, though, they didn’t seem good. They seemed like I was ashamed of Eli, of what we were doing, and that wasn’t how I felt. God, I’d messed this whole thing up completely. “That was a mistake,” I said quietly. “Our relationship is not a secret, it’s just new. I just…”
Eli walked in then. He didn’t stand there and wait. He walked right up to me, crowding me, surrounding me with his scent, his warmth. Cassie had started on her rant again, and I didn’t hear a word; all I could focus on was the man in front of me, the determined expression on his face.
“Say good-bye,” he said quietly.
“Cassie? I have to go.”
“We’re not done talking about this.”
“I am. I’ll call you in a couple days.”
“Abi…”
“Good-bye.” I ended the call and looked up at him, desperate to touch him but not sure if he wanted me to. An ache began in the center of my chest. “Are you still mad?” I whispered.
He shook his head, took my hand, and led me outside. He carried on across the dry, scorched earth that was my yard and toward the barn. Our horses were saddled and standing out front. We stopped beside them, and I stroked Bess, saying hello to my horse, then looked at Eli and waited for him to tell me what was going on. He didn’t say a damn thing. Instead, he wrapped his fingers around my waist and plonked me in my saddle, passed me my hat, then climbed onto Gus and headed out.
Elijah was a man of few words; I knew this, and I was getting used to our conversations. When he spoke it was because whatever he wanted to say was important to him, so I listened. But his silences could be equally telling. Right now, I didn’t think he knew what to say, how
to express the way he was feeling. He was going to show me. He was also asking me to trust him.
And I did. Every part of me trusted every part of him.
So I followed. I didn’t need to know where we were going. Elijah would take care of me, protect me, make sure I had everything I needed. I realized in that moment that I’d follow him anywhere. That thought should have freaked me out. It didn’t.
We rode for a long time, maybe a couple of hours, and we were nearly to our destination when I realized where he was taking me. The old trapper’s hut came into view a few minutes later. It had been here since before my grandfather owned this ranch. I used to come here with my dad sometimes when I was a kid. He and the ranch hands would use the place to sleep or cook when they were working on this side of the property. The ranch was big and not all of it could be used for grazing. Some of it was wild and untamed. The hut was in our farthest field, where the pasture ended and nature took over.
I always thought it was so beautiful, but I hadn’t been out here in years.
Elijah dismounted, walked over to me, lifted me off Bess, then led her and Gus away. I stood there watching as he removed their gear, went to the small shed by the cottage, and came back with some hay.
Leaving them to graze, he returned to me and held out his hand. I took it without question. I could tell this pleased him.
When he pushed open the cabin door, my jaw dropped. The rough-sawed walls were cobweb-free, and there was a large striped mat on the floor. The old couch had a gray woolen blanket over it, and the two small steel-framed cots that had always been there had been replaced with a full-size bed. The frame was rustic and chunky, and I could smell new linen and wildflowers. My mouth went dry. “Did you make the bed?”
“Yes.”
My heart fluttered, squeezed. The quilt covering it was yellow, my favorite color, with a delicate floral print, frills around the edge, similar to my own. “And the quilt…”
“I know you like flowers.”
There was a chipped crystal vase there as well, filled with straggly wildflowers, looking a little worse for wear. I swallowed the lump in my throat. God, to me they were the most beautiful flowers in the world.
Breaking Him Page 10
