by Red Culver
"There is a magical dead spot just over your heart. Either you're an agent of the Deceiver or you're carrying a lead box. You do not detect as evil, so I am forced to conclude the latter."
I paused for a moment, sighed, and reached beneath my armor to draw out the case. I placed it in Neera's hand. She drew back a step and flipped the case open.
Nestled within, silver on a black silk cloth, was Cerissa's enchanted +1 dagger.
The zeel snapped the case shut and handed it to a guardsman. Cerissa and I watched as the guard walked past the glass guard station to the nondescript door Cerissa had noticed earlier. He pulled a key from his belt, unlocked the door, and passed through. A moment later he returned without the case.
The guard nodded to Neera, and she held out a hand to let me pass. "Do not try to trick me again," she said.
Cerissa and I moved quickly into the crowd, looking hastily around us. Most of the guests were still outside, mingling in the red light of the setting sun, so we were among the first to enter the museum. There was no sign of Mordred.
"I thought that went perfectly," I whispered to Cerissa. She didn't look at me, but I knew she'd heard me when a little smile cracked her icy composure. "Now we just have to lay low until Mordred gets here."
Luckily, we didn't have to wait long. We watched from behind a suit of armor as Mordred entered alone. He was dressed much as he had been the other times we'd seen him: red velvet shirt, tight black leather pants, cowboy boots. He didn't have his pistol on him, but the Doctor Strange amulet still hung around his neck. He passed the door guards quickly. A short conversation with Neera ended with him drawing an object from his pocket: the roguelock. He handed it over, and it was spirited away to the vault just as my lead case had been.
"Time to go to work," said Cerissa. We started for the vault door, but stopped short when we saw Mordred approach it.
"What's he doing?" I asked. The wizard stood before the vault door, murmuring beneath his breath and making quick motions with his hands. "He can't be getting the roguelock back already, can he? He was supposed to mingle first."
"Shush," said Cerissa. "He's putting a wizard lock on the door. Must not trust the guards... can't say I blame him."
"Wizard lock? What's that? Can we handle that?" My heart was pounding again.
"Come on," hissed Cerissa. She grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the vault door as Mordred mixed back into the growing crowd. "Cover me."
I put myself between Cerissa and the crowd as she pulled her lockpicks from somewhere personal beneath her dress. She knelt down and began to work the lock as I tried to look casual. Soon there was a mechanical click, and a satisfied snort from Cerissa.
"Almost there," she whispered. She quickly began to mutter something I didn't understand as she laid her hands on the door. After a few seconds of this, she gave the door a short, sharp rap with her knuckles.
It swung open.
I rushed past Cerissa into the vault. She followed close behind as we made our way down a short marble hallway.
"I can only cast knock once per day," she whispered. "And it can't break a wizard lock, just shut it down for a bit. So we've got about ten minutes and then we're trapped in here."
I looked back at her as I stepped into the room at the end of the hall. "Okay, I—"
"Halt!" Two guards were running at me, pulling handaxes from their belts. One was a pug-nosed niflung, the other a dark-skinned human: Captain Donner and Ravis, the pair who'd harrassed us entering the city. The museum must have brought in extra muscle, considering the guest list at this shindig was mostly criminals.
"You said there'd only be one!" I shouted at Cerissa.
"I said there'd probably be one!" she said. She sprang into the room behind me, heading towards Ravis while I moved to cut off Captain Donner. He brought his axe down in an overhand chop, and I threw myself at him, trying to get in under his arm.
Attack Roll: 8
AC: 12
Miss!
The axe scraped off the back of my new armor as I collided with Donner. He slammed up against a table where numerous confiscated objects lay in a jumble. They jolted and rattled as he hit.
Attack Roll: 12 + 1 = 13
Hit!
Damage: 1
I'd hit, but without a weapon I'd be nickle-and-diming the captain with single points of damage while he chopped away at me with his axe. We broke apart as he gasped for air, and behind him on the table I saw the sweetest sight of all my time in Borealis: my weapons.
I grabbed my sword with my right hand and my dagger in my left as Captain Donner's axe thunked into the table beside me.
Attack Roll: 4
AC: 12
Miss!
I was relying on luck again. I needed to end this, and quickly. I twisted away from Donner and flicked my wrists, slipping both my weapons from their sheaths.
Short sword equipped!
Attack Bonus: +2 (Duelist)
Damage: 1d6
Dagger equipped!
Attack Bonus: +2 (Duelist)
Damage: 1d4
That was more like it. Adrenaline sloshed into my veins as I squared off with Captain Donner. He feinted left then hooked back around, trying to close with me before I could get my blades up. I was happy to let him come to me, and as he drew close I lunged forward with my sword leading the way. We crashed together in a tangle of steel and leather, and I felt something bite into my side, just below the armpit.
Attack Roll: 18
AC: 12
Hit!
Damage Total: 4
Remaining HP: 3
You can't take another hit like that! said Flik.
No shit, I shot back.
Attack Roll: 12 + 2 = 14
Hit!
Damage Total: 5
Donner gasped in my ear, and his armored weight slumped against me. I felt a sudden heat, and looked down to see bright blood oozing out around a red gash where my sword had broken through his chain armor, slipped in under his ribs, and pierced his heart.
I stumbled back, pushing the dead niflung off me. He slumped to the floor in a clatter of armor. I whirled around to see Cerissa bent backwards under Ravis's assault.
I shook my head. Cerissa had the guard's wrist in a double-handed grip, trying to force away the axe that was inches from her face. Her tight-fitting dress looked ready to pop a seam. I darted in, and Ravis looked up in surprise. Cerissa twisted out from under him and kicked him between the legs. He gasped and staggered backwards into the table of confiscated items. Before he could right himself, Cerissa snatched a sword off the table and slammed the pommel into the back of his head. He fell forward and landed face-down on the floor.
"You weren't supposed to kill him!" Cerissa turned on me.
"I know!" I said. "I didn't mean to! He just— he just—" I felt panic welling up inside me. I'd just killed a man. Sure it was self defense, and the guy was a creep, but still. I looked down— my armor was astonishingly free of blood, as was the floor. Apparently the action movies I'd seen where blood spurted and sprayed from every cut weren't faithful recreations of reality.
"We'll talk about it later," said Cerissa. "Clock is ticking. C'mon."
Glancing around the vault, I realized that it held more than just the magic and weapons taken from the party guests. It also seemed to be a storage space for items that weren't currently out on the museum floor. Cerissa and I dragged Ravis across the floor and heaved him into a deep masska catamaran, then did the same with Donner's body. The corpse landed with a wet thump. Any other guard entering the room would notice his compatriots missing, but with any luck, Mordred wouldn't know anything was amiss. We just had to be out of the museum before the alarm was raised.
"Okay, where is this thing?" I said as we pawed through the jumble of items on the table. The guards hadn't been too conscientious about keeping things organized, and our fight hadn't helped. I was just starting to despair when Cerissa held up the roguelock with a shout of joy. A moment later
I found my lead-lined case.
"Give it here," Cerissa said, her hand outstretched. I watched as she opened the case and dumped her magical dagger on the table. She slid a fingernail between the lining and the outer wall of the case and popped the lining out. Hidden beneath it was our fake roguelock.
Not bad, boss, said Flik. He sounded a little impressed, and I was feeling pretty pleased with myself.
"My knock spell is about to run out," gasped Cerissa from the table. No time to ask how she knew, so I left her at the table and ran back down the short hallway to the door. I tried it— still unlocked, thank God— and I eased it open a few inches. Peering out, I could see that the reception was now in full swing. Fortunately, the vault door was hidden in a corner between the guard station and the wall, so the guests had no reason to come this way. I stuck my boot in the door and looked back at Cerissa.
She snapped the lead case shut with a click. A moment later she was by my side at the door.
"Okay, time for one deep breath." She put her hand on my shoulder. "In... and out. Let's go."
Together we pushed through the vault door and out into the central hall of the museum. The door shut silently behind us. I couldn't help myself— I turned and tugged on the handle. It was locked tight.
"Tell me you did it," I whispered as we rejoined the crowd. Cerissa winked.
Soon we were swept up in the glamor of the party. Mordred was nowhere to be seen as we moved between chattering, drinking guests towards the door. I kept my head down, and Cerissa let her brown-dyed hair fall in front of her face. As the children of two of Mordred's old compatriots, we were at high risk of being recognized.
A murmur moved through the crowd as we neared the door, where the zeel wizard Neera and the guards were still checking entrants. Looking back, I saw Mordred moving among the guests, a wicked smile on his face. Wherever he passed, whenever he shook a hand or patted a shoulder, a ripple of awe spread out like waves on a pond. Two partiers, a masska in a loose striped robe and an elf in black leather, moved apart just in front of Mordred and I saw a black-and-silver amulet— our fake roguelock, with any luck— hanging from his neck.
Thus I was perfectly placed to see him glance down at the roguelock and look back up with fury reddening his face.
"It's a fake!" he roared, his voice booming over the low chatter of the party. The great hall fell silent, other than the clinking of a few champagne glasses on a waiter's tray. Mordred didn't seem to notice, or maybe didn't care, about the scene he was making. "Where is my amulet?!"
A few guards hustled over to Mordred's side. Among them was Talus, the young elf who had let us in. Mordred whispered to them as they strode briskly together toward the double doors to the promenade. Already, guards were forming a line blocking the exit.
Shit.
"Ladies and gentlemen!" shouted Neera over the commotion. Talus was hovering at her side. "We beg your humblest pardons. Something has been taken from one of our esteemed guests, and we must find it. Please remain where you are. The guards and I will be coming by as swiftly as possible to search out the stolen object. Once the item is uncovered, we can all return to the festivities. Thank you in advance for your cooperation."
"We gotta move," I hissed to Cerissa. She was wide-eyed with shock. I grabbed her hand and pulled her through the crowd toward the back of the great hall. I whispered as we went. "We can't get out the front door; Mordred is there. We need to hole up until he's gone."
"Where are we going?" she asked as we elbowed past a shocked-looking old human couple.
"Away!" I led her into the inner ring of the museum, to Aquitana Hall, the chamber dedicated to the Home Island of the elves. Dozens of sarcophagi gleaming with silver and jade stood in silent rows down the center of the room. Behind us I could already hear the party guests shouting their disapproval with the way they were being treated. I glanced over my shoulder and saw Mordred speaking with a few furious members of the criminal nobility. He looked apologetic.
We stopped in the middle of Aquitana Hall. A few last guests trickled out into the central hall, drawn by the commotion. We were alone— but not for long. Neera, flanked by Talus and and a stout human guard, was headed in our direction. I looked around at the sarcophagi towering over us. Lead-lined sarcophagi...
A minute later, Cerissa and I stood anxiously before Neera and her guards. They had their axes out and looked ready to use them.
"Why were you in here?" the zeel asked, her voice a dangerous rumble.
"Admiring the artifacts," said Cerissa. She waved a hand at the rows of coffins. "I think one of these was my dad's."
Neera crossed her arms impatiently. "Lie all you want. It won't help you. The roguelock will be found. Guards?"
Talus and the human stepped forward and patted us down roughly. It was nothing like the polite feel-up we'd gotten when we entered. They even managed to keep their axes in hand as they groped their way over our bodies.
"Nothing, ma'am," said Talus from behind me.
"Nothing here, either," echoed the human guard at Cerissa's side.
Neera frowned, and then her eyes roved past us and over the long ranks of sarcophagi.
"You think you're so clever, don't you?" she said. Her eyes fell on me. "Though I can't understand why you'd expect a trick that failed the first time to work the second." She sighed. "That's the human mind for you, I suppose."
"I don't know what you're talking about," I said.
"A lead-lined case to hide the glow of magic." The blue-skinned wizard shook her head. "The dead spots are obvious."
"You think we stole the roguelock and hid it in one of these sarcophagi?" I asked.
"I do," said Neera.
"Okay," I said, unable to suppress a smirk. "Which one?"
The answer, as it turned out, was none of them. Neera grew increasingly more furious as her guards pried open coffin after priceless coffin, only to find them all empty. Cerissa and I waited patiently as the minutes stretched into an hour. The noise and chaos from the central hall of the museum faded as angry guests demanded to be let out after they were searched. The party was ruined, Mordred's big moment killed in the crib, and soon only Cerissa and I remained with Neera and the guards. Even Mordred seemed to have given up and slunk away to lick his social wounds.
"Nothing, ma'am," said Talus as he peered into the last of the sarcophagi.
"Perhaps we might be released now," said Cerissa, her haughty voice back in full effect. "This entire night has been a colossal waste of my time, and you had the gall to break things up before dinner was served. If I don't faint before I reach home, I shall be amazed."
"Not yet!" snapped Neera. "I know you two are responsible. I just need a little more time to prove it."
"All due respect, ma'am," said Talus, "we really need to be letting them go. These two are, uh, somewhat special guests. We can't just hold them forever."
"I most certainly can!" Neera hissed.
"No, ma'am, you can't," said Talus gently. "It's time we cleared them out."
This was all the invitation Cerissa and I needed, and we followed Talus as he headed back to the central hall. The guests were all gone, and it looked as though all the extra guards had left, too. A few waiters floated around picking up the last of the wine glasses.
Soon we were receiving a final pat-down, which yielded as much nothing as the last half-dozen. Talus opened one of the double doors for us, but we didn't head out into the night. Instead, Cerissa put out an expectant hand and cocked an eyebrow.
"What is it, ma'am?" Talus asked.
"My man's dagger," she said. "It was in a small case that was taken when we entered."
"Of course, ma'am," said Talus. He hustled over to the vault door and spoke with another man there. Soon he was trotting back towards us with my lead-lined case in his hand.
"Very good," said Cerissa as Talus handed it to me. "You have been most accomodating on an otherwise terrible night. I'll make sure your name reaches the right ears."
> The young elf blushed, the long scar over his nose standing out white against pink. "Thank you, ma'am. Much obliged."
"Stop them!" someone shouted. Ravis, the guard from the vault, was headed toward us on unsteady feet. A wide, white bandage was wrapped around his head. "Stop! I know them!"
Cerissa and I shared a wide-eyed look. Our violence in the vault must have been discovered, and Ravis hadn't stayed knocked out long enough for us to make our exit. Visions flashed before my eyes: our scheme revealed, a trial not just for theft but murder as well... what did they consider justice here in fantasyland?
Talus rushed to Ravis's side and helped him stumble to us.
"I know them," slurred Ravis. His eyes were bleary.
"I'm sure you don't," said Cerissa.
"I do! I've seen you... somewhere."
Cerissa turned to Talus. "This man is raving. May we leave, please? It's been quite a tedious evening."
"Ha!" shouted Ravis. "I remember!"
The hall fell silent as everyone looked at the injured guard. Neera had appeared from somewhere, and leaned in to hear Ravis with sharp interest glittering in her eyes.
"She's a whore!" Ravis jabbed a finger at Cerissa. "From the Two-Legged Mermaid. And he's her pimp. They promised me a free ride!"
Everyone began talking at once. Neera hissed in disgust and Talus apologized over and over as another guard gently ushered Ravis away. Cerissa blew a storm of indignation at everyone she could see, and soon Talus had the door open again with a deep bow. Cerissa swept out into the evening, and I followed.
Our footsteps were soft on the crushed stone of the promenade. Two full moons hung in the sky, casting soft blue light over the city. The promenade ended and we turned the corner onto a busy downtown street. I pulled the lead case from under my shirt and snapped it open. Cerissa's dagger lay on the black silk, and I handed it to her. With my fingernail I pried out the lining. Folded underneath it was the roguelock, blue and black in the moonlight. I smiled.
"That," Cerissa said as she linked her arm in mine, "was a pretty good plan."
