by Beth Rinyu
“You don’t have to do that, Gia. We can make this work if you want to keep touring with the ballet.”
“But that’s not what I want anymore. In fact, it’s not what I wanted all along. I want you.” I propped myself up on my elbow and stared down at him. “There’s something else, I want to say, and I probably should have discussed this with you before I said yes, but I was just in shock. Then with everyone else around…it’s really something that needs to be talked about in private.”
“What’s that?” he asked.
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to have kids. My doctor told me it may be a little harder to get pregnant. I just don’t want to take that opportunity away from you; you’re going to make a great dad someday.”
“Hey, stop. I want you, and if other things are meant to be, then so be it.”
He pulled me on top of him and kissed me deeply. “Easy there, you don’t want to get your little friend down below all excited. We are at your mom’s house, after all.” I teased.
“Too late and too bad. I have to hear all about her sex life, too bad if she hears a little of mine.” His hands moved under my shirt and his lips grazed my neck.
My eyes widened and I let out a lout laugh. “Cameron James! I don’t think I can do this.”
“Why not?”
“Umm….because your mother is like a second mom to me.”
“You talk about sex with her all the time.”
“Yeah, but not about having sex with her son.”
“Gia, I’m dying here and this is the perfect payback.”
I let out a deep sigh. “Okay, we can have sex, but we have to be quiet.”
“Whatever you say.” He lifted my shirt over my head and I smiled. When his tongue cascaded down to my breast, I knew he wasn’t playing fair. “Okay, we can make a little noise,” I giggled.
Thirty-Six
Cam
After two more weeks of physical therapy and two weeks on my rehab assignment in the minor league, I was back to the place where I was happiest, on the infield right between the second and third baseman. There was only a month left of the regular season, but I didn’t care; it felt so good to be back on that field again. Gia and I had decided on a small wedding once the baseball season was over. She was planning on making the move to L.A. fully at that time as well. For now, she’d been dividing her time between L.A. and New York and while I could tell all the travel back and forth was taking its toll on her, she never once complained. It was a huge step for her to leave her mom and Carrie, and I wished that there was another way around it, but as long as I was playing in L.A., there wasn’t.
Gia, Mom, and Herman were at the field watching the game. It had come down to the top of the ninth and we were trailing by two. With two men on and two outs, it was up to me to either end this game as losers or drive in some runs and at least tie it. Gia seemed to be out of sorts before the game, so I teased her and told her that I was going to do something special just for her. So far, it was pretty uneventful, just routine plays on the field, a few base hits and even a strike out, nothing that could be deemed as even close to special. With a full count on me, I knew that I was down to my very last pitch to make that a reality and with the swing of my bat I did, as I watched the ball go over the right field wall, causing us to win the game five to three. As I ran around the bases and tapped home plate, I couldn’t help but laugh, Gia really was my good luck charm.
I met Gia, Mom, and Herman just outside the stadium after showering and changing. We were going to grab something to eat, and my mother, who was forever trying to prove that she knew her way around L.A., insisted that they drive separately to the restaurant instead of going with Gia and I. Herman finally relented and got into the passenger’s seat after he tried coaxing her to go with us but to no avail.
“Umm…shouldn’t she at least be following you?” Gia asked, when my mother pulled out of the stadium in front of us, leaving us stuck at the light for what seemed like forever.
“She swears she knows the way…..or at least her GPS does.” I shook my head and forced a smile.
“So, I was highly impressed with that homerun you pulled off at the last minute.” Gia smiled and took my free hand, bringing it up to her lips.
“Told ya I was going to do something special just for you.” I kept my eyes on the road and the build-up of traffic ahead. My mother was completely out of sight by the time we got on the freeway. I hoped her GPS worked because Gia and I were now stuck in a major traffic jam.
“What the heck is going on?” Gia asked.
“Who knows? Probably road work or maybe an accident. If I could just make it to the next exit then I could get us there through the back roads.”
“Well, what about your Mom and Herman?”
I pulled up her number in my phone to give her directions on what exit to get off but didn’t get an answer. “I forgot, she never answers her phone when she’s driving,” I said as I disconnected the call.
“Well, try calling Herman, he’s always got to answer his phone, he is a doctor after all.”
I immediately dialed Herman’s number but only got his voicemail as well after a few rings.
We crept up slowly and I could almost see the sign for the next exit. “It looks like there may be an accident up there,” Gia said as she stretched her neck out the window.
“Wouldn’t surprise me with the way these assholes drive on this road.” I turned up the radio and threw my head back, making myself comfortable since we were probably going to be here for a while. The ambulance and police car flying by confirmed what Gia had thought, it was most definitely an accident.
Gia pulled out her phone and tried calling my mother once again only to have it go to her voicemail. We moved up a little more and the blinking lights of the ambulance were now in sight. Gia stretched her neck out the window once again to try and get a look at what was going on. As the traffic started to pick up from a dead standstill to a snail’s pace and we got closer to the accident scene, Gia let out a loud gasp. “Oh my god, Cam!” she screeched when we looked on the side of the road to find the driver’s side of the rental SUV that my mother had been driving completely demolished.
***
Twelve hours had passed and they had been brutal. My mother was still in critical condition and it was just a waiting game. Herman walked away from the accident with just a few scratches and a sore neck. He said that everything had happened so quickly, but from what he remembered, two cars were racing each other as they got onto the highway, cutting my mother off and crashing into the side of her which in turn caused her to spin around and get broad sided by on-coming traffic. I felt totally helpless. I didn’t know what I would do if something had happened to her. As much as I bitched about her being on my case all the time, I knew that a piece of me would die along with her if something were to happen to her. Gia hadn’t left my side. I knew that she was just as upset as I was, but she managed to stay strong for me and do everything she could to offer me comfort. I’d had a complete meltdown when we had gotten back to my house last night and I don’t know what I would have done if Gia hadn’t been there to help me get through it. She had called her mom and broken the news to her and she and Ben scheduled the next flight out.
Gia took my hand as we entered my mother’s room. I felt tears burning my eyes, just seeing her hooked up to all of those machines. I would have given anything to have her nagging at me right now. Herman sat by her bedside, looking just as distraught as I was feeling.
“Herman, why don’t you go grab something to eat,” Gia said gently as she approached him. “We’ll call you if anything happens.”
He nodded and stood up, placing his hand on Gia’s shoulder before leaving the room. The nurse came in to check her IV, and Gia and I stepped out of the way. “Talk to her,” the nurse said. “You’d be amazed at what she could hear. Give her a reason to wake up.” Gia looked up at the nurse thoughtfully and smiled.
The haunting sound of the machines
beeping were a painful reminder that they were what was helping keep my mother alive. I bit my lip and stared out the window, not wanting Gia to see me crying once again, but it was too late. She walked past me and placed her hand on my arm, offering me some support. “It’s going to be okay, I promise,” she whispered in my ear before walking over to my mother’s bedside.
“You know you can do this,” she began to speak to my mother. “We have a wedding to plan and my mother is going to be really pissed at you if you’re not around to help us plan it.” I could hear her voice cracking and a steady stream of tears began to roll down my face. I needed Gia to be strong because I couldn’t be. “Okay, if I let you in on a little secret, will you wake up?” She sounded like she had pulled it together ever so slightly, letting out a deep breath before she began to speak once again. “This is privileged information, so I’m trusting that you won’t breathe a word of this to anyone.” I wiped away the last of my tears, trying my best to pull it together before turning around to face her. She looked at me and bit her lip before taking my mother’s hand in hers and whispering in her ear. My heart raced when my mother’s leg began to move in response to whatever Gia had said.
“Did you see that?!” I asked Gia. She nodded with a smile that was a mile wide. “What did you say to her?” I asked.
“Nothing….it’s between me and her.”
When my mother’s leg moved again. I ran out to get the nurse to let her know what was going on. She followed me back into the room and quickly examined her.
“Tell her again,” the nurse instructed Gia. Gia whispered in her ear and in addition to moving her leg a slight smile etched across her face. “I’m going to page the doctor on call,” the nurse said, sounding hopeful as she walked out of the room. I threw my arms around Gia, wanting to believe that this was a good sign.
“What’s going on?” Herman asked, entering the room with a cup of coffee in his hand.
I shook my head. “I don’t know, man. Gia whispered something to her and she responded.
“Well, what did you say?” Herman asked, I could hear a hint of enthusiasm in his voice.
“Can’t tell.” Gia shook her head and smiled. “That’s between me and Aunt Jodi.”
We all turned our heads in my mother’s direction when she began to mumble something just as the doctor walked in. Her eyes were wide open and they had never looked so bright and beautiful as they did at that moment.
“Okay, okay….easy.” The doctor said as my mom’s incoherent rambling continued.
“Gia,” my mother’s voice was strained but Gia’s name was as clear as day. Gia walked over to her and my mother weakly reached for her with her arms. Gia responded by throwing her arms around her and hugging her tightly.
“Thank you for waking up,” Gia cried, wiping away the tears that were rolling down her face.
The doctor began to ask my mother simple questions like: her birthday, her middle name, her mother’s name. It was like music to my ears to hear her answering them all correctly.
“Okay, Stacia here is going to bring you down to do another CAT scan, but I think you should consider yourself a very lucky woman.”
“You have no idea how lucky,” my mother replied with a raspy voice, smiling at Gia as they wheeled her bed out of the room and down for her CAT scan with Herman following close behind.
“I promised you it would be okay,” Gia said, running her fingers through my hair and planting a gentle kiss on my lips.
“What did you say to her?” I asked.
A sly grin spread across her face. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“Umm….yeah, I really would.” I rested my hands on the small of her back and pulled her closer to me.
She wiggled her index finger for me to come closer. I leaned down, and she stretched her neck to whisper in my ear, “I’m pregnant!”
***
After spending four more days in the hospital and two days at my house, my mother was heading back to New York in a few hours. I was just coming off a week long stretch of home games and flying out to Chicago then Milwaukee, Colorado and Pittsburgh before the regular season finally wrapped up. Gia had headed back to New York last night with her mom to prepare for her final performances, and I was really wishing that I could be there to watch them, knowing how much it meant to her.
“Well, I’m all ready to go!” my mother said as she zipped up her bag. “Sorry about that, I didn’t plan on causing so much excitement.”
“It wouldn’t be you unless you were creating chaos,” I teased.
“I guess as soon as Herman gets back we’ll be on our way.” Herman and Lenny had hit it off big time. Once Herman had learned that they shared a common love - antique cars. They hit up a local car show this morning and still weren’t back.
My mother stared at me for some time before I finally questioned her gaze. “What’s up?” I asked.
“I just can’t believe I’m going to be a grandmother. No offense, but I never thought I would see the day this would happen and I especially never expected it to be with Gia.” Her smile grew wider. “It’s as if all of my wishes have come true. My little boy is going to have a little one of his own with the girl of my dreams!”
I was still getting over the shock of it all. I was as happy as could be over the news, but totally wasn’t expecting it. Gia’s fears of not being able to get pregnant were put to rest. She admitted to me that she wasn’t planning on saying anything to anyone until she was about another month into it for fear of something happening, but felt the need to tell my mother to give her that extra push that she needed when she was in the hospital, and it worked like a charm. I understood her fears, especially after everything she had been through, but deep down inside I knew that this time it was going to be all right. I was excited to take on this new role of husband and dad and planned on being there for her every step of the way.
“You’re going to be the best at it, Cam. The same as you are with everything you do. I’m so proud of you.”
“Thanks,” I whispered. I let out a deep breath, trying to find the words that I wanted to say to her the entire time she had been lying in that hospital bed. “Mom, I know that I get pissed at you a lot for always being on my case and I’m sorry. If there’s one thing that your accident made me realize, it was how much I would miss your nagging.”
She shook her head and smiled. “Well, have no fear because I’m still here, and I plan on nagging you for many…many more years.” She threw her arms around me and hugged me tightly. “You’ll see why I nag so much when this little baby of yours comes into the world. You really don’t know what love is until you’ve experienced the love you will have for that child. No matter how famous you are or how old you become, I will always see you as that little baby boy that I first laid eyes on in that hospital room twenty-eight...” She stopped herself and looked deep in thought. “Wow! Actually, twenty-nine years ago.”
“Not for another two weeks, Mom.”
“Well, close enough. I was so young when I had you. I was scared to death, but as soon as I saw you, it was love at first sight. I can’t wait to experience that all over again with my grandbaby.” A slow grin spread across her face and she began to laugh. “And, I’m going to be the favorite grandma!” She laughed even harder.
I shook my head and smiled. She’d been rubbing it in to Melanie for the past two days about being the first one to know. “Well, you two can agree to disagree over that one.”
“Well, it’s about time! We’re barely going to make our flight!” my mother scolded Herman as he walked through the door.
“No worries, I’ll get you guys there in time,” Lenny chimed in.
“Yeah, Lenny has the drive to the airport down pat.” I chuckled.
“Sure do!” He agreed.
Herman grabbed his bag and my mother’s before saying his goodbyes and heading out to the car with Lenny.
“So, when am I gonna see you again?” My mother asked as I walked her out.
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“Well the season is over in two weeks, so probably after that.”
She nodded and smiled. She was just about to get in the car and turned around to face me once again. “I love you, Cam.”
“Love you too.” I hugged her tightly.
“See you soon.” She leaned up and kissed me on the cheek and ducked into the car, closing the door behind her. I stood in the driveway and waved goodbye as I watched them drive away. I realized how differently things could have been right now and how lucky I was that my mother was okay. I had so much to be thankful for, that was confirmed when I pulled out my phone to read the text that had just come through:
Gia: I puked my guts up this morning and it made me happy! Our baby is letting me know that he or she is still in my belly alive and well! Come on baseball and be over already, me and this baby miss you!! Xoxo
I felt like such an idiot for being unable to wipe away the grin on my face as I stared down at my phone. Yes. I was very thankful.
Thirty-Seven
Gia
It was hard to believe that I was sitting down with my mother and father together without any bickering or snide comments. They’d come into the city to help with the final arrangements for my wedding, which was taking place in just one week. My father just happened to have an early afternoon meeting close by, so we decided to finish up with the plans at the restaurant that morning. Cam insisted that he pay for everything, but my dad wouldn’t hear of it. It didn’t matter how much money the man I was marrying had, he refused to break tradition. We had decided on a very small and very private reception with just our closest friends and family members. My only request was that it be in my favorite place in the world and during my favorite time of year. New York City at Christmas.
“Can you believe you’ll be my husband in just one week?” I asked Cam as we finished up our bagels at the same coffee shop that I’d been avoiding for so long. It felt so good to step inside and not be haunted by those memories of Jasper anymore. All the heartache from that point in my life was gone and now replaced with happiness of a future with Cam. There was only one thing from that relationship that I would keep inside my heart forever and being pregnant once again made me reflect on that quite often.
