“What was she like?” Harbor’s voice was soft, curious in a way Theo hadn’t heard before. He chanced a glance at Harbor’s face, and for a moment, couldn’t breathe at the sight. Warmth radiated from every pore, and the shine of emotion in those blue eyes was something Theo wasn’t prepared to name, but it wasn’t pity. Not even close.
“Better than I deserved,” Theo answered honestly. When a noise of protest sounded from Harbor, Theo shook his head. “No, really. By that point, I was such a punk. For the longest time, I did not give her the respect she deserved, but...” he shifted his gaze to the empty flower beds dotted around the base of the fence that enclosed the back yard. “She never gave up on me. Gave me a real home for the first time in my life. She was a good lady. Made sure I did my homework and kept me fed and clothed. Fussed over me when I'd come home busted up from wrestling practice. Your mom reminds me of her in a way, with all the gardens and the fussing.” Theo smirked, and Harbor chuckled. “Helen always had these boxes filled with flowers. Different ones for every season, it seemed like.”
“I bet they would have gotten along great. Wish I could have met her.”
“I wasn’t here when she passed. They said she went in her sleep, peacefully...” Theo’s heart clenched like it always did when he thought about it. “But, fuck, I hate the thought of her being here alone when it happened.”
“Did she have any family?”
“Just a brother.” Theo couldn’t help the sneer that thinking of Ray always caused. Especially now. “He never cared for her choice to foster parent. Said if she wanted kids, she should have gotten married and had some. He especially didn’t care for me. He used to call her and ask if the punk ass black boy was still giving her trouble.” Theo shook his head.
“Asshole.”
“Major. He didn’t even call me to tell me she had died. Her lawyer did.”
“What the fuck? And he knew the two of you still had contact?”
“Oh yeah, I was always here for the holidays and her birthday. He didn’t call me out of pure spite.” Theo bit his lip, all the rest nearly pouring out of him, and he was suddenly exhausted. From the day and from the roller coaster he’d been riding since he’d walked into Carson’s office that morning. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell Harbor, but at this point, it wasn’t even going to matter. They’d settle out of court, and then Ray would be out of his life for good. Besides, Harbor already had enough on his plate. “But that’s all water under the bridge now. I just,” he blew out a breath, “I just want to make this place home again, because that’s what she wanted. She always told me I couldn’t live forever up in the clouds, and that someday I’d have to put some roots down somewhere.”
Harbor reached across the table, warm, strong fingers wrapping around Theo’s. “You’ve got a good start and I’m here. Whatever you need.”
“I’m beginning to think I don’t deserve you, either.” There was a clog in Theo’s throat, full of all the things he actually wanted to say.
“You shut that down right now,” Harbor said, standing up and closing the nearly empty pizza box. He leaned across the table and planted a kiss on Theo’s lips. “Let’s go make the bed. I’m ready for a shower and your naked self pressed up against me.”
The shower wasn’t big enough for the two of them, so Theo let Harbor go first and dug the new teal sheets they’d washed earlier out of the dryer. He’d finished making the bed by the time Harbor came out of the bathroom, gloriously naked and smelling like a dream. Rushing through his own shower left him more awake than he’d been on the porch, but when he walked back into the room only the little lamp on the nightstand on his side of the bed was on, bathing the room in soft yellow light and casting shadows over Harbor’s face, slack with sleep. Theo clicked off the lamp and slid between the sheets beside him, relishing the cool glide of the material over his skin.
“Theo?” Harbor’s voice was soft and sleepy as his hand reached across the space between them.
Theo smiled and took his hand. “I’m here, baby.”
Harbor hummed and scooted closer, pulling Theo to him until he was pressed all along Harbor’s side, one leg nestled between Harbor’s thighs, and head resting on his chest. He sighed when Harbor’s arm settled around his back, holding him close.
Warm lips ghosted over the skin of his forehead. “Sleep.”
And Theo did.
Chapter Eighteen
Training with Harbor was intense. Sure, he joked that Rory got all his workouts from Theo’s own fitness videos, but anyone could follow a routine or learn an exercise. There was no way to teach someone determination or drive or sheer fucking stubbornness, and Harbor had all of those in spades. Theo had never been so worn out in his life just trying to keep up day after day, and night after night. Sharing a bed with Harbor was its own test of endurance, in the very best way.
“I mean I thought you were bad,” Angie said standing beside him on the outside of the training cage set in the middle of the gym. Harbor was inside doing a live five-on-one spar with fresh faced and hungry jiu jitsu guys. “But he’s a machine.”
Theo had to agree. He had wondered if the extra training and the aggressive way Harbor got after whatever exercise or opponent that was put in front of him was his way of coping with the Vidar situation, but as the week progressed, he realized that wasn’t the case. It was all just standard Harbor.
“How long before he gases, and one of these guys takes him down?” She asked, watching another of the gym regulars go down hard, flat on his back after attempting a takedown only to be met with Harbor’s now legendary sprawl, and then falling victim to a takedown himself.
“Are you kidding? They’re not taking him down. He’ll have them all tapping out before time runs out on the clock.” These guys weren’t at Harbor’s level, but the drill was still effective. Five guys, coming at the guy in the middle one-on-one until they tapped and were eliminated, or the person in the middle of the circle tapped. It was an exhausting drill for the person in the middle as he faced a fresh opponent the moment he’d stopped the one before.
The last of the five tapped out, and Harbor growled in triumph before turning to set his eyes on Theo. The other guys filed out and went to lick their wounds.
“You’re next, Theodore.”
Angie laughed and elbowed Theo in the ribs. “Yeah, go get him, Theodore!”
Theo shook his head but stripped his shirt and handed it to her. “Don’t you start that shit, too.”
Her only response was to laugh and give him a little shove towards the cage door. “I’ve got to go start my kick boxing class. You two don’t have too much fun.” She turned to walk toward the other end of the gym where a more traditional boxing ring sat. There were plenty of people working out in the various areas, including a several people who seemed perfectly content to watch Harbor instead of the TVs mounted above the treadmills. Not that Theo could blame them.
Stepping into the cage, he let the door clang shut and looked at the man across from him. There was a predatory gleam in his blue eyes as he stalked back and forth, keeping his muscles warm and limber and ready to pounce. This would be a light spar, shadowboxing more than anything else. While Theo had a cup and a mouth guard this time, neither of them were in gloves.
“How you feelin’ there, Blondie?” Theo asked, walking to the middle of the cage as Harbor did the same.
“Good,” Harbor said, raising his fists for Theo to touch. As their fists bumped to start their spar, Harbor raked his eyes over Theo’s bare chest.
“Behave.” Theo smirked and cut his eyes over to several people blatantly staring at them. “We have an audience.”
“You ashamed of me?” Harbor’s brow furrowed, but his tone was teasing.
“You know better.”
Harbor shifted back, hands coming up. “I do.”
Shifting on the balls of his feet, Theo did the same and led with a jab which Harbor blocked. “Fights will be announced today. Curious who your oppone
nt will be?”
“Not really.” Harbor feinted right, and they began to move together, back and forward, finding a rhythm.
“So,” Theo panted once they’d been working for a minute. “What do I get if I take you down?”
Harbor laughed, actually laughed before he shot in, lunging down, and catching Theo in a single-leg takedown. They hit the floor with a thud and Theo groaned, “asshole,” before scrambling to lock his legs around Harbor’s waist in the guard position. It was also very close to the position Harbor had fucked him in the night before, but he didn’t have time to dwell on that as Harbor sat up attempting to disentangle himself, the heat in his eyes saying the position wasn’t lost on him either.
They grappled for a moment before Theo asked again, “What do I get if I take you down?”
Harbor huffed, “What do you want?”
Theo shifted and scrambled, slipping free and hopping back to his feet. “Your ass.”
It was almost comical the way Harbor stalled mid-step before he got his bounce back. “Really? Now you want to talk about this?”
“You asked.”
Rolling his eyes, Harbor shot in again, but Theo defended, sprawling his feet and bracing, fighting off the takedown. As he fought his way free of the clinch, he moved to slow, and Harbor’s elbow slammed into his mouth. His head snapped back with the force, and the world lost focus before a sharp pain bloomed over the lower portion of his face, and the taste of copper hit his tongue.
“Shit! Theo.” Harbor sounded half-panicked and nothing like the confident fighter he’d been a moment ago. He could feel Harbor’s hands on his face, and he winced at the sting.
“I’m okay,” he tried to say, but got half choked and quickly sat up, only for the world to spin. Why was he on the floor?
“Easy, don’t move too much.”
The concern in Harbor’s voice was starting to annoy him. He’d taken shots to the face before. Ha. Shots to the face.
“What are you laughing about? Theo?”
He reached up to pull out his mouth guard, only to find it was already gone. His fingers came away wet and red. Harbor disappeared from in front of him, and then a moment later he was back and pressing something against Theo’s mouth which made the stinging worse. “Ow.”
Angie’s face floated into view beside Harbor’s. “You weren’t supposed to knock him out.”
Harbor’s expression morphed into a scowl, and Theo’s brain started to come back online. He was sitting in the center of the cage, one leg bent at the knee and the other stretched out. Harbor was kneeling over his extended leg and had a wad of gauze pressed firmly against the pulsing pain in Theo’s lip that felt like the size of a softball.
“Hey.” He gripped Harbor’s wrist to pull the gauze away from his face. “I’m all right. It’s not like I’ve never been hit in the mouth before.” Every movement of his lip sent a fresh wave of pain radiating through his cheek and jaw.
“Stop talking,” Angie said. “You keep tearing it back open.”
Harbor pressed a fresh gauze pad against his mouth, and Theo reached up to hold it in place himself, hand resting over Harbor’s for a moment. Their eyes met, and Theo was surprised at how wrecked Harbor looked. A busted lip was nothing. Happened all the time.
“I’ll grab him an ice pack,” Angie said, hopping up and heading out of the cage.
“Think you can stand up?” Harbor asked quietly.
“Babe, I know you rocked my world, but I’m fine.” Theo tried to hide his wince as another pain shot through his face.
“It’s pretty deep. You guys keep liquid bandage here?”
“This is a fight gym, you know. Ow.”
“Stop talking and come on.” Harbor stood up and stepped behind Theo to grip him under the armpits to help steady him as he got off the ground.
As soon as he was vertical, Theo’s head spun, and his stomach rolled. He pulled a deep breath in through his nose and winced only slightly when he blew back out through his mouth.
“Let’s get you patched up,” Harbor said, steering him out of the cage and toward Angie’s office. Theo knew she kept a huge supply of first aid supplies in there. She met them halfway, taking up position on Theo’s other side so that he was sandwiched between them. He wanted to complain about it, but he was still a bit dizzy, and his face was throbbing. Harbor had freaking clocked him apparently.
Angie’s office was positioned close to the gym’s entrance and was spacious enough for her desk, a couch, and a little table where Theo had eaten lunch more times than he could count.
“Put him on the couch,” Angie said, stepping ahead of them to pile the two throw pillows on one end.
“I can put myself there, thank you,” Theo groused as he settled back against the cushions, secretly thankful to no longer be upright.
“I’ve got to get back to my class, you’ll check him?” Angie was looking at Harbor and once he nodded, she left the room, closing the door behind her. The silence was blissful.
“Open your eyes and look at me,” Harbor said from right beside him.
Had been blissful, while it lasted anyway. Theo sighed and opened his eyes to meet the blue stare of his concerned boyfriend.
Shit. Harbor had hit a lot of people in his MMA career, a few before that, too, and it had never really affected him. Not like this. He told himself he was being ridiculous, this was their sport and sometimes you got hit in the mouth. Period. But the cold ball of dread still hovering in his gut knew that regardless of what his head was telling him, other parts were not pleased.
Theo opened his dark eyes and met Harbor’s gaze, and some of that ball chipped off and fell away. His eyes were clear, lucid, and his pupils were both normal. “Are you nauseous? Dizzy?”
“Harbor, I don’t have a concussion. You hit me in the mouth and busted my lip. It’s not the end of the world.”
Harbor bristled at Theo’s tone, but held himself back, and instead pulled the gauze away from Theo’s face and gently replaced it with an icepack. Theo winced a bit, then took the pack from Harbor and settled back onto the couch, leaning his head against the back and closing his eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
Theo squinted at him. “Harbor, I know you didn’t mean to hit me, at least not this hard. We were sparring, it happens. I know you know this. It’s not a big deal. And as soon as my heart stops beating in my lip, I'm hoping we’ll be laughing about how you knocked me the fuck out.”
Blowing out a shaky breath, he attempted a smile. “Sure. If you’re good here for a minute, I’m going to go grab our stuff. Concussion or not, you need to rest. Your head snapped back pretty hard.”
“I’m good,” Theo said, and Harbor stood, only to stop when Theo grabbed his hand and squeezed. “I really am, babe. This is nothing.”
Nodding, Harbor squeezed his hand back and headed to the locker room.
This was so bad.
There was a war raging in him. The fighter in him knew that this was all part of it. Taking down the opponent, in training or a real match. It didn’t matter. That instinct, that lack of hesitation had won him fights he would have lost based on skill alone. The fight commentators called it the killer instinct, and all agreed, he had it in abundance. He’d always been proud of that before. Before he’d watched Theo’s eyes widen in shock, then go dazed as he hit the mat and blood started pouring from the cut on his lip. There was still some on Harbor’s hands.
Regardless of his training, regardless of his fight instinct, the man in him had taken over in that moment. Because it was Theo he’d just dropped. Theo he’d made bleed, and in his heart, that was all wrong because Theo wasn’t an opponent, wasn’t a threat. Wasn’t just another obstacle standing between him and an MMA championship. Theo was the lips he wanted to kiss, and the arms he wanted feel around him. Theo was the smile on his face. Theo was his to protect, his to love.
Harbor sat down hard on the bench in the locker room. The realization of what was happening here taking his leg
s out from under him. He was in love with Theo.
Chapter Nineteen
One week turned into two, and Harbor hadn’t said anything, but it was obvious that something was weighing on him. Whether that something was the bruise still coloring Theo’s jaw or Vidar and Rory’s continued absence, Theo wasn’t sure. Even though he had a feeling it was both. When the first weekend rolled around after they’d gone to stay at Theo’s, Harbor had suggested they continue on there until the next weekend—Labor Day, and then go spend three days with Harbor’s family in some cabin out on a lake that they apparently rented every year for that weekend in particular.
Stretching in the bright spill of sunshine coming through the windows, Theo let himself starfish out in bed, frowning at the coolness of the sheets where Harbor’s warmth should be, but he let it go. He could hear Harbor in the bathroom, but maybe he’d been up for longer than Theo thought. It was Saturday and he’d let himself sleep without an alarm. He needed to get up and get moving though; they needed to be on the road soon if they were going to be on time to meet the rest of the Rourke crew at the cabin.
The shower was running in the attached bathroom, and for a moment, he let himself just luxuriate in the domesticity of it all. In his mind, he knew he should be freaking out right now. Should be itching to be on a plane and heading somewhere or seeing something. He’d never liked standing still, never liked attaching himself to things, but two weeks into playing house with Harbor, and that itch hadn’t surfaced. On top of that, he’d received a phone call from Carson the day before that he’d managed to get Ausman to drop his case to contest Helen’s will.
“He didn’t have a leg to stand on, Theo. All it took was a little digging to find that Helen had foreseen this possibility and made sure that you were taken care of,” Carson had said. “The house is yours, free and clear, and you don’t have to pay that asshole a dime. You’ll still be getting a bill from me, though.” Carson had laughed at his own joke, and Theo had chuckled right along. Carson’s rate was worth it to have that bastard off his back and out of his life. To know that Helen had taken steps, not even knowing the end was near, to make sure that the only house he’d ever felt at home in would remain his. He felt like a giant weight had been lifted off his shoulders.
Open Wounds: The Boxed Set Page 22
