He smiled faintly. "I'm not surprised. I spent a lot of money keeping her happy."
Her eyes' closed, and she was glad that he couldn't see her face. "Lorraine told her that we were getting married."
That brought his head up attentively. "Did she? What did she say?"
Dana laughed. "She said she'd buy us a wedding present," she said, without mentioning the cruel way the other woman had put it.
"That doesn't sound like the Layn I know," he murmured. His eyes searched for her. "Where are you?"
"Here," she said, moving closer to him.
He caught her by the waist and drew her to him. "Did she bother you? I forget how unworldly you are. Layn can be dangerous."
"I can take care of myself," she reminded him. Her eyes studied his dark face. Was he regretting it all? Was he mourning for Layn?
"That's going to be my pleasure from now on." He suddenly lifted her clear off the ground so that her eyes were on a level with his sightless ones. "Kiss me, Dana."
Without thinking, she leaned forward and pressed her mouth very softly against his. He let her take the initiative, standing quietly while she savored the cool firmness of his lips against her own.
"You're very cool, darling," he whispered softly. "Mad at me?"
Her heart jumped at the endearment as well as the question. "No, of course not," she assured him.
"Then kiss me as if you mean it, Dana," he said, "not as if you're doing an unpleasant duty. Unless..." He frowned, "...unless it really is unpleasant?"
"Silly man," she whispered adoringly. She kissed him again, harder this time, lingering over his firm mouth until she felt the tension drain out of him, felt the warm response of his lips, the gentle hunger of his enclosing arms.
"Better?" she teased gently, clinging to him.
"Much better," he murmured, nibbing noses. "But that's enough of that," he added with a hard sigh, setting her firmly back on her feet. "I'm no saint"
She smiled. "You're doing very well for a man who isn't."
"Yes, aren't I?" he growled. He found her hand and held it warmly as they started walking again. "Dana, you do realize that things will be...different...when we're man and wife? I won't have a marriage of convenience at my age."
"I understand," she agreed. "I don't want an artificial marriage, either. I...I'd like to have children." Daydreams. Wonderful daydreams. She was refusing to face facts and she knew it, but wasn't she allowed to dream just a little?
His hand contracted painfully. "Children," he whispered. "I hadn't thought of that."
"Don't you want a son?" she teased. "I thought most men did."
"Of course I do," he growled, jerking her close to his side. "It's just that I hadn't expected...my wife didn't want them—did Lorraine tell you? She didn't want the inconvenience."
She smiled. "Perhaps if I were beautiful and gay and worldly...."
"No," he returned. "I think I know you quite well by now. No, it wouldn't matter. You'd have your own and a dozen orphans besides, wouldn't you, and never count the cost. You'd love the whole world if it would let you."
"You make me sound saintly, and I'm not," she countered. "I'm only—"
"—a woman," he finished for her. "Yes, I know. But what a woman!" he added, bending to brush his lips over her forehead. "No regrets? Will you be sorry that I can't see our children?"
Her heart stampeded at the sound of that. Our children. She smiled. "No," she whispered. "I'll describe them to you in minute detail. You won't miss a thing."
His jaw tautened. He stopped, dragging her into his arms, and kissed her suddenly, hungrily, shocking her into a wild response of her own.
He released her all at once and moved away. "I'm sorry," he said curtly. "It was thinking about children.... We'd better go back in. I feel odd."
"Are you all right?" she asked quickly, full of concern.
"Just my head. Dana, the headaches are so much worse lately," he said pensively as they turned back toward the house. "I'm taking more and more medication, hadn't you noticed?"
She had, but she was trying not to show too much concern. "We'd better call Dr. Shane, just to play it safe, don't you think?" she asked calmly. "It's probably just the hours you've been putting in lately. More stress. It's perfectly natural."
He seemed to calm at her own easy manner. "Yes, that's probably what it is."
"But we'll have him check you over. I'll call first thing in the morning."
He nodded. "Now, no more about doctors. Let's talk about houses. Where would you like to live?"
They spent the rest of the evening talking vaguely about houses and cities and holidays and schools for the children when they came along. But Dana didn't sleep well. The headaches weren't natural, and Gannon had to know it. They were playing a game, and she was afraid of the outcome.
The next morning she called Dr. Shane and described Gannon's symptoms. He asked her to bring in her fiance that afternoon and let him run some more tests.
She drove him to the office and sat in the waiting room while the two of them talked. Gannon reappeared, taciturn and irritable, directing her to the hospital, where he was to be admitted overnight while Dr. Shane had the tests performed. Dana was concerned about that, and she had a suspicion that something was wrong. But Dr. Shane wouldn't talk to her, and neither would Gannon, since she was now in the position of a fiancee, not a nurse.
Lorraine paced with her, worried with her. But when the test results were in and Gannon was released from the hospital, he told no one what had been found. In desperation Dana called Dr. Shane, only to be told that what he'd found was privileged information, but that she needn't worry, he was certain everything would be fine.
She approached Gannon, but he wasn't talking. He only smiled and kissed her and told her that there was a chance, just a slight one, that his sight might come back. And then she knew what was wrong with him. He was going to see again—but he didn't want to be saddled with her when it happened. He wanted Layn, and now there was a chance he could get her back. But only if Dana was out of the way.
She imparted that information to Lorraine, who laughed at her.
"You're being ridiculous, dear," she chided. "He wouldn't want Layn now; not after the way she Created him. Don't be silly. He loves you!"
But he didn't. He'd already admitted it. And now Dana was worried, terribly worried. How was she going to survive if he sent her away? She loved him so much, how was she going to let go?
Chapter Eight
Dirk came down for the next weekend, and Gannon welcomed him with unusual fervor.
"I'm glad you came," he said, thumping his brother on the back. "You can keep Dana and Lorraine company while I work on the visual aid with Al Pratt. He should be here any minute."
"Shame on you," Dirk chided. "A newly engaged man..."
Gannon looked briefly uncomfortable, bearing out Dana's suspicions that he hated being engaged to her, newly or not. "I know, but time is money where this new device is concerned. We've got some innovative ideas we want to work up before somebody beats us to the punch. Oh, and I've invited a guest for Sunday dinner, Lorraine," he added.
"Anyone I know, dear?" Lorraine asked without looking up from her needlepoint.
"Yes. Layn."
There was a silence in the room so utterly sudden that the sound of the woman's name seemed to echo endlessly. Dana closed her eyes, feeling her heart shatter. It was true. Now she knew it was true.
"In that case," Dirk said quietly, "I think Dana and I will drive down to Savannah for the day on Sunday."
Gannon started to speak, stopped and smiled faintly. "Perhaps that would be just as well. You might take Lorraine with you. And you might stop sounding so suspicious while you're about it," he added, the Dutch accent emphasizing itself. "It's business. Layn and I have investments together in a shipping company. We're going to discuss stock and expansion. That's all. I haven't forgotten my own engagement."
"I'm so relieved to hear it," Dirk said
curtly. "If it is an engagement."
Gannon blinked. "I beg your pardon?"
"Dana isn't wearing a ring," he observed, "and I haven't heard any mention of a wedding date."
Gannon coughed. "There hasn't been time. I've been busy."
"Sure," Dirk said shortly. He jammed his hands into his pockets. "Dana, care to go for a walk with me? Pratt's just driven up, and I know Gannon will have other things on his mind."
"Of course," she said in a ghostly tone. "Lorraine, would you like to come with us Sunday? Maybe we could go back to see Katy and Maude?"
"I'd like that," Lorraine said, struggling for composure.
While they discussed times and plans, Pratt came in to join Gannon, and the two of them vanished into the study behind the closed door.
Dirk was outspoken about the Sunday dinner and angrier than Dana had seen him since they became acquainted.
"Layn here," he growled. "And when he's engaged to you! He might consider your feelings. Lorraine told me what she said to you in town!"
"He doesn't know what she said," she told him quietly. "I didn't think it was necessary to tell him. I can handle Layn myself."
"So you think," he returned darkly. "She'd cut you into ribbons, and you know it. She's been after Gannon for a long time, despite the fact that she ran after the accident. I've always thought it was as much because she thought he'd blame her as because she didn't want to be around a blind man."
"Did he love her very much?" she asked.
"I don't know my brother that well. He's very good at disguising his feelings." He shrugged. "But they were together most of the time until he was blinded."
She felt sick all over. And now it was starting again: she was going to lose him. And there was nothing she could do. She didn't have the weapons to fight a woman like Layn.
"Maybe it really is business," she said softly.
"Maybe cows will run computers," he scoffed. "Don't kid yourself, honey; they don't need to meet here on a Sunday to do something they could manage over the phone."
Tears sprung to her eyes, but she blinked them away, too proud to let him see how hurt she was.
"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I shouldn't have said that. It could be innocent..."
"You don't have to tell me something I already know," she said softly. "He doesn't love me; he said as much."
"But you love him very much."
She nodded. "Fortunes of war," she laughed bitterly.
"The first time in my life, and it had to be man like Gannon.... If only I were beautiful and worldly and sophisticated!"
"You wouldn't be the girl you are," he corrected. "I like you as you are. So does he."
"Like," she agreed. "Not love. And it wouldn't be enough, eventually. It's just as well. I'll be sad for a while, but I'll get over him."
"Will you really?" he asked, eyeing her.
She turned away. "Let's go look for sand crabs. They fascinate me, the way they dive into the sand to hide. Look, there's one...!"
He watched her with sad eyes, wishing there was something he could do to ease the pain she was trying to hide. But he was as helpless as she was.
Dana had been hoping that the other woman wouldn't show up until after she and Dirk and Lorraine had left the house on Sunday. But as luck would have it, Layn was on the doorstep before Lorraine had finished dressing.
"Well, hello, darling," she told Dirk as he answered the door. She was resplendent in a sea-blue dress with white accessories and a matching scarf tied over her hair, looking the fashion plate she was.
Layn's eyes darted past him to Dana, and she gave the other girl's simple white sun dress and sandals a distastefully quick appraisal.
"I'm not too early?" Layn murmured.
"Of course not, darling," Dirk replied with sweet sarcasm. "Gannon's waiting for you in his study. The rest of us are off to Savannah for the day."
Layn looked faintly shocked. "Leaving poor Gannon all alone with me?"
"We could load a gun for him before we leave," Dirk suggested.
Layn only laughed. "You might load one for rne," she murmured, glancing at Dana. "Since he's been keeping company with the little saint, he may be desperate for some wicked company."
Dana's eyebrows lifted. "Think so? I'll have to remember to polish my halo more often."
Layn became angry when she couldn't get a rise out of Dana, then whirled on her heel and stalked off into the study.
Dirk was trying to smother his laughter and failing miserably. "You wicked lady!" he burst out.
Dana only shrugged. "Well, she asked for it. Shall we wait for Lorraine in the car?''
But just about that time Lorraine came quickly down the stairs to join them, and they left without even a good-bye to Gannon.
It was a long day. Dana, despite the fact that she enjoyed visiting Katy and Maude, spent most of the hours brooding on what was going on back at the house. Was Layn right? Would he be so desperate for a woman that he'd make a dead set at her? Was he tired of Dana's repressive ways? Was he trying to find a way out of the engagement? Why else would he have flaunted Layn hi front of her?
They stopped at a restaurant for lunch, and while Lorraine was creating a salad at the salad bar, Dirk leaned forward earnestly.
"Worried?" he asked softly. "You've hardly smiled all day."
Dana smiled faintly. "Yes, I'm worried. How can I compete with somebody who looks like Miss Dal-mont?"
"Easily, since Gannon can't see her," he replied brutally.
"That's not what I meant He's seen her; he's never seen me." She toyed with her napkin. "Besides that, he's not a saint I must be a drag to him...."
"He adores you. It's even obvious to someone as thick-skinned as myself." He reached over and touched her hand. ''Come on, spill it."
She lifted her shoulders. "I think he's trying to make me leave."
He frowned. "Why?"
"It's not something I can explain. But ever since he went back to the doctor, he's been distant with me. I can't get close to him."- She looked up, worry shadowing her eyes. "They told him his sight was very likely to return—something about the shrapnel that they wouldn't tell me. What if he's beginning to see again?" she groaned. "Compared to Layn, I'm so ugly—and he loved her! Now she's back and he's asked her to dinner...."
He caught her hand in his and held it gently. "You're not ugly. You're a lovely woman, and any man would be proud to marry you. Even me, the confirmed bachelor, if I thought I had a chance."
She blinked, not believing him.
"Think I'm kidding?" he mused. "I'm not. There's a quality in you that I've never seen in another woman, and I like it very much. If Gannon didn't have a place in your heart, I'd give him a run for his money."
She blushed softly and lowered her eyes on a smile. "Thank you. You don't know what you've done for my crushed ego."
"I wasn't flattering you."
"Yes, I know." She lifted her eyes again. "He wants Layn, you know."
He sighed wearily. "Yes."
"I won't hold him to a promise he made in a moment of weakness. The minute his sight is restored, I'm going home to Ashton," she said firmly.
"You might consider fighting for him," he reminded her.
"With what?" She laughed. "I don't have potent weapons, and even if I did, I wouldn't use them. I'm not the type. No, he'd have to love me. And he's already admitted that he doesn't. It would be a very empty kind of relationship—don't you think?—if all the love was on one side."
He nodded solemnly. "I suppose so. Dana, if you do go home, I'd like to see you again."
She smiled. "I'd like that too."
He grinned. "Now we're getting somewhere. Tell me about your work."
They started discussing the advances in medicine when Lorraine joined them, and then the talk switched to flowers and gardens for the rest of the meal.
Gannon was alone when they returned to the house; he was preoccupied. He let Dana bring his meal and they sat in a cool silence f
or a long time while he finished it and asked her to pour him a second cup of coffee.
"Did you have a nice day?" he asked absently.
"Oh, it was lovely. Katy and Maude send their love."
He laughed bitterly. "Just what I need."
She paled, turning her attention to the coffee cup. "Did you get your business straightened out?"
He leaned back in the chair with the cup in his hands. "Yes. Layn's very lovely, isn't she?"
"Very," she agreed.
"Poised, sophisticated...with an excellent business head. The kind of wife a businessman could depend on to help him accomplish his goals," he added; his point seemed to have been made deliberately. He sipped his coffee. "What was she wearing?"
"Blue," she said, staring into her own cup. "Sea blue."
He chuckled. "One of her favorite colors. I remember a bathing suit she used to have, when I took her to Nassau...." His face clouded and he stopped abruptly, swinging forward in the chair. "Can you take dictation?" he asked suddenly. "I need to write some letters, and I'm not fast enough with the computer yet. Can you type?"
"Yes to both," she said agreeably. "I'll be glad to help you."
"Yes, I know," he said under his breath, and looked as if he were hurting inside. He leaned back wearily in his chair and closed his eyes. "It doesn't help the situation."
She moved closer to the desk, studying his lined face. "Gannon, is your sight returning?"
He made a curt movement, his sightless eyes opening on darkness. "What?"
"Are you beginning to see again?" she persisted. "I know something's happened—I can feel it. You're... you're very distant lately."
He laughed harshly. "Am I? And why do you suppose I am?"
She studied her feet. "Layn's very beautiful," she said quietly.
He sat breathing steadily, deliberately. "Yes."
"And you...you cared for her before you were blinded,"
"That too." He cocked his head, listening. When she didn't say anything more, he seemed to slump. "She blamed herself, you know," he said finally. "She was driving the speedboat It's taken her all this time to come to grips with it and realize that I didn't blame her."
Dana didn't believe that for a minute, but she kept quiet. More than likely, the knowledge that Gannon's sight was returning had a great deal to do with Layn's sudden interest in him.
Books By Diana Palmer Page 223
