by Cheri Chaise
Or at least one of them.
Even so, I still awoke with a hollowness in my heart that only my loving dusky husband could fill. And after Mrs. Barker’s revelation upon arrival, I wasn’t certain when that would ever be again.
With all of the hubbub over Abby’s feeble state, I’d yet to learn the full extent of Mrs. Barker’s brief confession yesterday. Of course, her burst of excitement upon our meeting was quickly checked by a flagging vigor that had her almost asleep in her soup by the end of lunch.
Both had slept right on through dinner as well, Abby having fallen into a mild feverish stupor. I didn’t have the heart to attempt to awaken either of them this morning, even though I needed to discern the full scope of my sister’s intentions.
But I’d had neither the opportunity – nor courage – to share with my husbands that Abby’s visit might be somewhat protracted.
Or perhaps even permanent.
I couldn’t begin to imagine what all had transpired to thrust my sister onto our doorstep for even this visit. Her husband, rest his soul, came from a respectable Pennsylvania coal family who had every means to provide for her. If not, there was also our father’s business interests and the family home back in Baltimore that should’ve been more than adequate to provide for her needs and upkeep.
If worse came to worse, she might even marry again. After all, the social circles of Washington DC were teeming with eligible bachelors of means who would be more than happy to take to wife a virtuous woman of high moral character like Abigail Davies Harrison.
Mrs. Barker was right in her summation yesterday. My sister was nothing like me. In virtually every respect. Which was why I’d had to travel far outside society’s circles to find a husband – and ended up with four men who loved me, each in his own way.
So for Abby to consider a permanent move, trading the conveniences of city living for a life on the Montana prairie, was preposterous. Unless that meant there was so much more to her story than what she’d let on in her letters.
And I was determined to shine a light on these hidden chapters – beginning with Mrs. Barker.
Who I found already busying about my kitchen in the darkness before dawn. “Mrs. Barker. You should be resting after such a long journey, not bustling about my kitchen.”
“Oh…forgive me, my dear,” she offered, pausing only to pat my cheek with a flour-dusted hand before popping a pan of biscuits in the oven. “But I couldn’t stay in me room another moment when I’ve’n the chance to cook for you again.”
“But you’re in my home,” I said as she swept by in a flurry. “You’re my guest.”
“And an unexpected one at that.” She stopped and the twinkle in her Irish green eyes dimmed a bit as she snatched up my hands in her dough-covered ones. “I hope I hav’n’t gone and put you out none too much, Miss Estella.”
I squeezed the older woman’s hand before letting go. “Just Estella…please. Out here, we don’t abide by the constraints of society.”
In so many more ways than mere titles and addresses.
A sharp nod. “Then same for you, Mi…Estella. They’ll be no more Mrs. Barker when Edna will do just fine.”
I smiled and started peeling the mound of potatoes sitting on the counter. “Thank you, Edna.” The informal address felt odd rolling off my tongue. “I hope your room was adequate last night.”
“More than adequate. That bed was the most comfortable I’ve slept in for an age.” She stopped puttering about and cocked a brow. “Then again, after two weeks on a train and more’n a few nights under the stars, a real bed was sure to feel like sleeping on the clouds o’ heaven.”
I groaned. “Please tell me Cole did not make you sleep on the hard ground.”
“Oh no, dear,” she tutted and tittered. “That husband ‘a yers was right accommodating…at least after he took care of the mass of trunks Miss Abby had carted along.”
I couldn’t help the sputtering laugh that slipped out, remembering only too well his reaction to seeing all of my trunks stored at Fort Union. “I would’ve loved to have seen the look on his face.”
“The look on whose face?” Cole asked as he strode into the room and set down an assortment of eggs fresh from the henhouse.
“Yours,” I giggled as I leaned up for a good morning kiss. “When you saw Abby’s trunks.”
His mouth set in a hard, grim line before his lips met mine in a quick peck. “I’ll never understand why women-folk think they need so much shi…stuff.”
“So we can look pretty for our men-folk,” I returned with a grin and a swish of my skirts.
“From that pile, you’d think she was planning to stay more than a few weeks.”
Mrs. Barker – Edna – opened and then shut her mouth when she glanced at me as I almost imperceptibly shook my head in silent entreaty. I needed to get all the facts from her and my sister before I broached that subject with my husbands.
Husband.
My heart squeezed a little tighter when Bret came around the corner with more eggs. The quick glance we shared revealed he had not slept as well as I had, having been relegated to the living room sofa. It broke my heart in the last moments before sleep had overtaken me to think of him out there.
Alone.
Had he had enough blankets to keep him warm through the long night? Had he even slept at all? I pressed my lips together to avoid expressing my concerns – and revealing my heart.
Bret offered up the eggs to Edna. She merely scowled at him before snatching the potato I’d just peel and chopping it up into tiny bits for a hearty breakfast hash. My dusky husband’s lips twitched into a frown as he set the eggs down with the others and silently made his way back around the kitchen corner.
Cole framed himself in the doorway. “I could use your help with the herd today…brother,” he emphasized with a wink my way that warmed my heart. “I’d like to get those calves branded.”
“You sure you want to do that today?” Bret’s voice floated from the far room and sent a shiver of desire up my spine. “Buck could use a rest after the trail.”
Cole’s sigh was heavy, as if this was a continuation of a previous discussion. “Ask Drew if he minds if I use Billy then.”
“Use Billy for what?” Drew’s disembodied voice asked as booted feet tromped down the stairs.
And a child’s sleepy voice punctuated the air. “Can I ride with you, Papa.”
My four-year-old’s question caught my breath in my throat. Dear, sweet Meghan who didn’t have any comprehension about the stormy complications her simple question had the potential to create.
Especially when Bret was the one to answer her. “Not today, sweetheart.”
I only hoped my daughter’s muttered curse hadn’t reached Edna’s ears.
The moment Cole stepped through the doorway out of sight to take the conversation outside, Edna grumbled with each rapid thwack of the knife through potato. “Where does that…that man have the gall to tell your daughter what she can and can’t do?”
“That man happens to be her…” The word stuck in my throat. “A Carston…and anyone who’s a Carston is family,” I finally said. “Bret is just as much family as Meghan’s…father.”
There. I said it. Somewhat. But it didn’t stop my belly from rolling with the rather misleading statement. I’d never imagined Edna with a prejudiced bone in her body. The very idea that she would think so badly of one of my husbands just for the sake of his skin tone made me ill.
I leaned against the counter and pressed a hand to my belly. What would she say about this child? Of Meghan, once she took a good, hard look at her without the fog of exhaustion clouding her sight?
Edna stopped cutting but didn’t look at me, instead scooping up the potatoes to drop into the heated and greased pan with a sizzle.
“I don’t understand how you tolerate allowing him under this roof.” She cracked several eggs and stirred the pan’s contents vigorously. “He should sleep out in the bunkhouse with the other hired
hands. Better yet, send him back to the reservation with the rest of the savages.”
I gasped as I spun around. “Bret is no more a savage than any other resident on the reservation. He’s a well-respected member of the Montana community. A hard-working member of this family. My family.”
Edna shook her head and muttered under her breath to cover over the shocked look that spread across her face.
“And you will respect his place while you are under our roof.”
The room suddenly tilted. Then swam. I grew hot and cold all at the same time. The scent of potatoes and ham and the sight of runny eggs all stirred together turned my stomach. I clutched my belly as it tossed and heaved.
I barely made it to the slop bucket in time. Edna held the loose strands of my ebony hair away from my clammy brow as my empty stomach emptied some more. It had been some time since I’d had a bout of morning sickness, but it had a tendency to sneak up on me with this pregnancy when I least expected it.
I sighed and wiped my mouth with the corner of my apron as I righted myself to see the gleam alight in Edna’s eyes. “Why Miss Estella, you shoulda told me you was expectin’ again.” She leaned in conspiratorially as a smile stretched her cheeks. “Does your husband yet know?”
I took a sip of the offered water. “Yes, he knows.”
I groaned. Just not the father she suspected.
I started as I realized I’d have to break my word to Bret and share our blessed news with the rest of the family posthaste – before Edna offered any misdirected congratulations to Cole.
I finished rinsing out my mouth and returned to the pile of potatoes with a sigh. Less than a day, and already the deceptions were piling up.
And if I wasn’t careful, the lies would no longer be able to hide the truth.
Chapter Twelve
Bret
Cole sat back from the table and rubbed his stomach with a contented sigh. “Well, the hay isn’t gonna load itself, so we best get to it boys.” He looked a bit reluctant to stand up from the table and head toward the door. “We’ve got a feed run to make, so who’s with me?”
“Ready to jump right back in the saddle again, huh?” I teased, licking the dollop of huckleberry jam from Meg’s finger.
“That’s mine!”
I gave my daughter a stern but still playful look when she stuck out her tongue. “Better keep that in your mouth, or I might take that too.”
A disgruntled huff came from across the table before Edna scooted away and began to gather up an armload of dishes.
“But you’ve only been home a few days,” Essie said as she took a damp cloth to first one then the other twin’s faces. “You can’t run off and leave again so soon.”
“Cattle ain’t gonna take care of themselves, wife, especially with winter coming on. We need to replenish the hay in the lean-tos and check on the herd.” Cole rounded the table to where Essie sat and leaned over for a kiss. “Figured we’d load up the wagons and cover the acreage east-to-west while we’ve got a batch of good weather.”
I never thought I’d be jealous of any of my brothers when it came to our wife. But right then, I wanted to be Cole, if only to openly kiss Essie in front of my brothers, children, and cousins. But Edna’s continually wary stares kept me firmly in my chair – for Essie’s sake.
“The good weather won’t last long though.” I planted a kiss on Meg’s silky head and stood the moment Edna rounded the corner into the kitchen. “I think we’re in for a rainstorm within the next day or two.”
“A little water never hurt nobody,” Drew offered, barely able to talk around the mouthful of food swelling his cheeks.
The kid looked like a fucking chipmunk. My little brother continued to shovel in anything within reach. Seth and Sean did the same, as if the three were in a race to see who could clean their plate the fastest. Ever since the twins had arrived, it seemed as if they were all in a competition to win a prize or something.
Or maybe someone.
The thought just kinda came out of thin air. We did happen to have another young woman in the house now. These three were all about the same age, and Essie’s sister was closer in age to them. Maybe a year or two older.
I fought against the furrow of my brow as I followed Cole in putting on my rugged outerwear. Drew was a virile young man and did happen to get the short end of the stick when it came to sharing Essie. Would he be better off with a wife of his own?
I just didn’t know how to feel about that. Then again, such an opportunity had never presented itself out here. The kid had a hard enough time understanding the subtleties of a relationship. The responsibilities of what it meant to be a husband and a father.
Oh, we’d all tried to help him in our own ways. But maybe in simply allowing him to watch or participate in small ways in our loving, we’d done more harm than good. Not allowed him to really dig for and find the depth needed in himself or his relationship with Essie by struggling through it with her.
But he was a good uncle. Had proven that time and time again with each opportunity to help look after our children. The fact they were all still alive said a lot for my little brother’s capacity to learn responsibility. Maybe it was time to lift the restraints and see how he fared. If he’d choose to find a woman of his own or stick with what we had.
Or maybe my thoughts and feelings had nothing to do with Drew. Maybe I just wanted too much of Essie to myself.
Something I couldn’t have – for now.
“You coming?”
Oh, I wanted to. Could feel the growing hardness of my cock as I watched Essie flit about the table, cleaning up our kids and fussing over the three knuckleheads still eating as fast as they could.
But I think Cole meant outside. I turned away from the scene and grabbed my hat from my smirking brother. “Yeah, yeah. I’m coming alright.”
“I’m coming too,” Evan stated as he stood and gathered up nearby dishes before heading into the kitchen and scuffing along the pine floor to rejoin us. “If I throw a few traps in the wagon, I can get an early lead on the upcoming season.”
“We’re not leaving yet. Just loading the wagon.”
“So let’s load the wagon and leave.” Evan just stared at Cole matter of factly.
“There’s still a lot of preparations to make,” Cole reminded him. “Food, water…”
“Hey Ee,” Evan called over his shoulder. Essie smiled at us all gathered around the door – until her gaze strayed to me. “Would you pack us up a trail crate?”
She nodded as she sent the children off to play. “I’ll be happy to.”
“And I’ll tell Cookie the same.” Evan smacked Cole on the chest as he walked by and out the door. “Problem solved. We’ll leave by lunch.”
“We’ll leave when I say,” Cole called after him.
It took everything in me to fight against the smirk that threatened to tickle my lips. I think I lost the fight.
My brother snarled. “What’re you grinning at?”
I held up my freshly gloved hands. “Nothing. Nothing at all.”
“You three,” Cole snapped at Drew and the cousins. “Breakfast was over five minutes ago. Get your asses outside and bring around the hay wagon so we can load it up.”
They all lurched up from the table and scrambled out the door without bothering to put on their coats, just snatching their hats before they raced across the yard toward the barn.
“You’ll want horses first,” I yelled after them as Cole and I stepped out onto the porch.
Their strides didn’t even change as they shifted to the right instead of continuing left.
“And pack up your saddlebags!” Cole finished.
“I should probably help them with the horses.” I smoothed back my long hair before donning my hat.
Cole’s grip on my arm stopped me. The anger had all dissipated from his face when I turned around. What I saw there now was concern radiating from those green eyes.
“I need you to do me a favor, brothe
r.”
“Anything.”
He glanced over his shoulder through the window then drew me aside to the other end of the porch. “After we get the wagons loaded, I need you to stay here. Watch over the womenfolk.”
My first reaction was to snarl at him this time with something like what the hell? But I kept my outburst in check. “I’d be better helping you.”
It’d be better for all of us if I wasn’t here at the house with nothing better to do than chores. All alone. With Essie.
And her sister – and Edna.
“This will be helping me.” He glanced over his shoulder as Evan came out of the bunkhouse. “More eggs were missing from the henhouse this morning.”
The muscle under my left eye twitched hard. “So it wasn’t just someone passing through.”
He shook his head. “I don’t rightly know, but it doesn’t look like it.”
“Do you think someone followed you from Glendive? You know…because of Abby?”
When they’d brought Essie to the ranch years ago, both Cole and Evan had sensed someone was following, just waiting to get their hands on our new wife. The confrontation they’d had before leaving the fort and the one months later out here in our front yard only confirmed their suspicions.
With women such a scarce and desirable commodity out here on the prairie, a new young lady showing up in any town always caused a stir that stretched far and wide. They didn’t even have to be much to look at. Most men just wanted someone of childbearing age with a willing pussy, and they’d drag her before an altar to say vows without so much as a howdy-do.
“We weren’t aware of anyone at the time,” Cole admitted. “But I’m not about to take any chances, which is why I need you here to make sure everyone stays safe…just in case.”
My brother started down the porch steps with me following. “Are you sure Evan wouldn’t be better to keep watch though? His aim is more accurate than mine.”
He stopped and spun around to look up at me. “That may be.” His finger poked hard against my chest. “But your heart is tied to Stella’s. I need someone around who will stop at nothing to keep her safe.”
