“Jack was always going to be right behind you. Always. But he started moving a hell of a lot faster once he read whatever you wrote him in that little note.”
“I see.”
“Whatever did it say?”
Caroline blushed. She certainly didn’t want Christine to relive any bad memories. Especially the ones she’d tried to put behind her after making her peace with Jack. “It’s not all that important.”
Christine pulled her into another fierce hug. “I’m glad the both of you made it. So very, very glad.”
We haven’t made it yet. Caroline looked at the blood under her fingernails. She hadn’t really thought about any other damage that might have been caused. “I must look a mess to you.”
“I can get you a change of clothes. This is all a little too familiar.”
Christine was trying to avoid dredging up the past, especially on a day that had so many emotional unknowns. “Oh, Chrissy. I didn’t even think-”
“Don’t worry about it. I still think you should change. Maybe sneak a shower.”
She resisted the urge to sniff herself. “Am I stinky?”
“Kind of.”
She shivered. “Today has been rough.”
“Are you cold?”
“A little.”
Christine covered Caroline up with her jacket. “How are you holding up aside from…this?”
“Everything is kind of blurry.”
“Is that a good thing, or a bad thing?”
Caroline leaned in for another hug. Maybe she’d stay there until a doctor showed up. “I don’t even know.”
“You and Jack are going to get some sort of commendation. You don’t get to escape that.”
“Don’t I have enough pretty trophies and awards?”
“Never enough for you,” Christine said softly. “But it’s one of my priorities. I’ve got to get up to speed, get a space to work out of.” She frowned. “Your rescue squad made quite a mess out of the White House, the Oval Office in particular.”
“It wasn’t just us,” Caroline said. “From what I understand, the Canadian Special Forces had a few A-Team moments.”
“I suppose I should be happy that I got that reference.”
Caroline rubbed her eyes. “Jack killed Santos,” she said softly. “Or, I’m going to let him think he did. He shot Jack, and Jack returned the favor.”
“He did what he had to do.”
“Is it right to let him think he killed a man? Or helped to?”
“For a very good reason.”
She thought about that lifeless body on the floor. Any number of bullet holes could have been the kill shot. Was it better to convince Jack he was innocent? “We both wanted him dead.”
“Your husband knew the risks when he led that unit into the White House. He was armed for a reason, ready to do what needed to be done. For justice, not vengeance. No one is going to say it was unjustified.”
“I know.”
“Are you afraid this is going to be the thing that finally sends you both off the mental cliff?”
Caroline laughed softly. “No. At least, I hope not.”
“You’ve done so much, Caroline. Gone through so much. It’s a testament to your character that you haven’t let yourself sink into a permanently violent mentality. Frankly, I’m impressed you weren’t the one who threatened to kill Murdock.”
Caroline shuddered at the memory. Sometimes Christine’s penchant for brutal honesty made her extremely uncomfortable.
“It’s okay,” Christine said. “I might have done it too.”
“You did kick him in the balls.”
“No comment. On a completely unrelated note, I tried to get them to make you president. Or Jack.”
What a conversation that must have been. “Oh, you did not.”
“I did. Then I realized neither of you would want it. If I’m wrong, you can always run in November if you wish.”
“I don’t want to be president,” Caroline said. “I doubt Jack does either.”
“Oddly enough, neither do I.”
“I assume that’s why they picked you.”
“Probably.”
“I’m not in the proper state of mind to be running an entire country. I’m not even sure I’m capable of operating a dishwasher.”
Christine hugged her closer. “Stop being so self-deprecating. You’re more stable than you think.”
“So are you. You’ll be good at this, Chrissy.”
“I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“There are people who will help you. Hell, you can’t do worse than what’s been going on for the past two years.”
“What a vote of confidence.”
“My best friend taught me to be honest with her.”
Christine started to say something, then turned and looked down the hall. A man in scrubs was walking toward them. Caroline stiffened as Christine tightened her arm around her shoulder.
“I’m Dr. West,” the man said. “Are you Mrs. McIntyre?”
Caroline didn’t bother correcting him, since she didn’t want to. She stood up shakily, handing Christine’s jacket back to her. “Is he okay?”
The doctor looked at Christine. “And this is?”
“The president,” Caroline said instantly. She almost enjoyed the fact that he apparently had no clue who he was speaking with.
“Oh,” he said. “Guess I’ve missed a few things. Sorry, ma’am.”
“I forgive you,” Christine said. “You were in surgery.”
“Maybe you don’t need me to keep you humble.” Caroline smiled at Christine, sobering once she brought her gaze back to the doctor.
“Tell us about her husband’s condition,” Christine said.
The doctor rubbed his eyes. Based on how long Caroline had been at the hospital, he’d likely been in the operating room for almost four hours. “He’s lost a lot of blood. But he made it through just fine.”
Fine. What did that really mean? Caroline sank onto the bench and didn’t say anything.
“How’s his knee?” Christine asked.
“It was pretty torn up. I wasn’t sure we’d be able to save the leg. We won’t know the long term damage until we start physical therapy. He’s in a cast for now, but will need extensive treatment.” West looked Caroline in the eyes. “He may have a limp, but there’s a very good chance he’ll walk again.”
Caroline stared at him. “There’s a chance he won’t walk again?”
“I think the odds are in his favor.”
Christine sat down next to her. “He’s going to be okay, Caroline. Focus on the details later.”
“I will. I just need to know what to tell him.” She had to be resilient. Jack deserved nothing less. “Can I see him?”
West gestured down the hall. “I’ll walk you to his room.”
Christine kissed Caroline’s cheek. “I’ll see to your children.”
“But-”
“You don’t need me right now. We’ll come back tomorrow. Your husband is tough. He’ll be running marathons by this time next year.”
Caroline hugged her. “Thank you for being here. Kiss the girls for me.”
Christine motioned to her security staff. “I’ll check in later tonight.”
Watching all those soldiers escort her out of the hospital was amusing. For the first time all day, Caroline smiled a genuine smile. “Sure thing, Madam President.”
*****
The doctor didn’t say much as he led her down the hall. But he had a soothing demeanor and told her if she needed anything to let the nurse know. Maybe there were kind people left in the world. Maybe Santos hadn’t destroyed all of America’s goodwill.
Caroline shut the door behind her. She definitely didn’t want anyone else in the room unless she expressly asked for them to be there. Jack’s leg was in an elevated sling, heavily bandaged. She swallowed back tears, trying not to think about what the doctor had told her. Her husband didn’t need any negativity.
; She pulled a chair up next to the bed and was suddenly acutely aware of how old he was, how close she had come to losing it all. Caroline took his hand in both of hers, studying every inch of him. How many times had he been in this same position because of her stubbornness, her flagrantly impulsive actions, her zealous yearning to do what she thought was the right thing? He’d gotten through all those trials; surely she could manage it once.
Caroline stroked his forehead gently and yawned. It would be a while before he woke up. She rested her head on his chest. He wouldn’t mind if she closed her eyes for a minute. He’d sure as hell let her know the instant he was awake.
She felt a hand stroking her hair before she knew it, and lifted her head up. Jack was giving her a tired smile.
“Hey, baby,” he croaked.
“Hi.” Caroline rubbed her eyes. “That was quick. You barely let me sleep at all.”
Jack tried to sit up and the sling shifted. He winced. “What the fuck happened?”
“Don’t you remember?”
“Something pretty serious must have gone down in the West Wing.”
“Yeah,” Caroline said quietly. “That was nice of you to show up without telling me.”
Jack squeezed her hand. “Element of surprise for everyone. Including you.”
“Santos was about to kill me,” Caroline said. “You stopped him.”
He closed his eyes. “I thought we weren’t going to get there in time. You must have done a hell of a job to keep him distracted.”
“I did my best.”
“You sure fucking did. I’m so proud of you, sweetheart.”
“I’m not the one who deserves praise. You’re the one who finally learned how to shoot.”
“He deserved it.”
He sure as hell had. She hoped wherever he was, it was quite warm. The myriad ways that situation could have ended almost sent her into a panic spiral. “You could have-” Caroline stopped to collect herself. “You sacrificed yourself to keep me from being shot.”
Jack caressed her cheek. “Pure instinct. You’re worth it.” He pointed at the sling. “How bad is it?”
Christ, this was hard. “Your knee is really fucked up,” she whispered. “They almost – they thought they were going to have to take your leg.”
“It appears to still be attached,” he observed.
Good thing someone found it funny. “Does it hurt?”
“Like. A. Motherfucker.”
He’d need some painkillers, maybe some water. And some food. But she wasn’t quite ready to press that call button. “You’re going to – you’ll probably need a cane, if you’re able to walk again,” Caroline said, and pulled her chair back slightly. “I’m sorry, Jack.”
“Don’t apologize. We held the guilty party accountable. Santos paid for his crimes.”
It seemed wrong to revel in another person’s death, but she wasn’t too broken up about the man who tried to destroy everything she believed in. “You made sure of that, you dangerous bastard.”
Jack shifted again, groaning. “I’ll be fine, sweetheart. Don’t worry about it.”
Maybe he did need a nurse. “I should get someone to check on you.”
“No,” he said quietly. “I want these few minutes with you before it gets hectic.”
She’d much rather have someone else in the room to keep her from falling apart. “Okay.”
“Where’s my note? You damn well better have saved it.”
Caroline had been trying not to think about the bloody fingerprint. About the folded note in her jacket. “I did.”
“I want it back.”
She pulled it out. “Here.”
“Read it to me.”
Straight out of surgery and already being a goof. “Are you flirting with your wife?”
“I want you to say it out loud.”
Caroline could humor him. He was in pain, and the note clearly held some meaning. She unfolded it. “You were always good enough,” she read, her voice soft.
“Put that with my stuff,” Jack said. “I don’t ever want to lose it.”
“Chrissy said you started moving twice as fast once you read it.”
“As you know, I am a hopeless romantic.”
“My heartfelt words of love motivated you?”
He kissed the back of her hand. “Your existence motivated me. The note was a nice boost.”
Even coming out of heavy sedation, he was doing everything right. She blinked back tears.
Jack tipped her chin up. “What’s wrong?”
“I can’t-” She shouldn’t be doing this. She was obligated to keep it together. But it was so fucking hard.
“It’s okay to cry, baby.”
Caroline bit her lip. “Not when you’re the one who’s suffering.”
“If you weren’t crying, I’d be a little concerned.”
He seemed calm. Serene. Almost happy. Exhausted and hurting, but oddly placid. “Is this enough now?” she asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Can you finally let go of your guilt?”
“I-”
“You saved my life,” she whispered. “I think we’re even. You don’t need to feel like you owe me anymore.”
“Is that what you think I’ve been doing?”
“I don’t know. But you’ve had this cloud hanging over you, ever since-”
“Don’t,” he said firmly.
He didn’t want to have this conversation. She wasn’t sure if he was trying to protect her, or himself. “You almost died, Jack. For me. You were laying on that floor bleeding out and all I could think was – did he do this to prove something to me?”
“I did it because I love you,” he said roughly. “It’s my responsibility to protect you.” He shook his head. “But it’s so much more than that.”
“Can you finally forgive yourself?”
Jack brought his hand to her cheek again. “That’s not it, sweetheart. I will always do everything in my power to keep you safe. If I’d died protecting you, I wouldn’t have regretted it for a moment.”
But she sure as hell would. “I would have been alone. I wouldn’t have had you.”
“But you’d be alive,” he said. “It would have killed me to know you were suffering. Caroline, don’t ever think you don’t deserve that kind of devotion. That amount of love. Because you do. And now I understand why you act the way you do sometimes.”
“I don’t know any better,” she mumbled.
Jack tucked her hair behind her ear. “It’s more than that.”
“I never blamed you.”
“I know you didn’t. I blamed myself. And I will never, ever blame you for my own decisions. Understand?”
“Okay.” She paused. “When you’re discharged I’d like to go to Philadelphia, if that’s okay.”
“Really?”
“That’s our home.”
“Maryland is your home too.”
True. But she wasn’t sure if she wanted to be quite that close to the action. Especially when her husband was recovering from a serious injury. “We can live in the district at first. But I think I’d rather stay away from all of that. Chrissy’s in charge until they figure out elections.”
To her surprise, Jack looked sincerely pleased. “Good.”
“You didn’t want them to pick you?”
“Absolutely not. I want to live a quiet life.”
“Permanently?”
“If possible. A nice, quiet existence with you by my side.”
Caroline glanced at his knee with concern. “You might have a few bridges to cross first.”
Jack squeezed her hand. “Doesn’t matter, as long as you’re with me.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
“I like what you’ve done with the place,” Caroline said. “The White House has a decidedly democratic feel to it.”
“I’m not switching parties,” Christine said.
“I meant purely in the non-totalitarian sense.”
“No, she m
eant it the way you took it,” Jack said. “Which means she’s convinced Roger will win.”
“Of course he will,” Caroline said. “We have a few months until November but he’ll get it done. Although Brian would be just as capable.”
“You dare to argue with the president?” Christine asked. “I’m escorting you to your own awards ceremony. How many heads of state do that?”
Caroline made a face. “You’re drunk with power. I may need to start another revolution.”
“Mom,” Marguerite said. “Now you’re being silly.”
“No, she’s being herself,” Christine said. “And it’s divine to see.”
“When’s Susannah moving back?” Caroline asked.
“She’s still packing up, finding daycare, that sort of thing.” Christine smiled. “I can’t wait for her to be back in Philadelphia where she belongs.”
“A promotion to partner is nothing to sniff at. Glad she’s coming home.”
“I’m eager to get home myself.”
Washington wasn’t home, for any of them. But Caroline still suspected that Susannah, Jacob, and her children would be hanging out at the White House while they could.
“When do I get to spend the night in the Lincoln Bedroom?” Sophie asked. “I mean, we may as well exploit this while we can.”
“I hear the president can be bribed,” Caroline said.
“Not likely.” Christine waited while Marguerite opened the door to the Green Room. “Jack, I hope you noticed how accessible the White House is.”
He hadn’t said a word as the President of the United States wheeled him down the hall. “I’m jumping for joy.”
She spontaneously kissed his cheek, setting the brake. “I’ll leave you here. Our other award recipients should be arriving shortly. Try not to set the room on fire.”
“Any press?” Caroline asked.
“Of course. We wouldn’t want to deprive you of a photo-op. They’re assembling in the East Room. I wanted to give you a little privacy first.”
Marguerite threw an arm around her sister. “You’ll be lucky to get mom to smile. Come on, Soph. Let’s check this place out.”
Patriotism could fade. Could manifest in different ways, take a hit when it was needed the most. It was nice to see that magical giddiness reappear in her children. They’d been to the White House before but it still seemed fresh and new to them. She hoped they’d never lose that idealism, especially when they had good reason to let it go.
Triumph (The Bellator Saga Book 6) Page 30
