by Rosie Hendry
Frankie had been shocked that the surgeons had had to perform a hysterectomy to save her sister’s life, as without it she would have bled to death – that visit to the knitting needle Nora had not only nearly killed her but had now deprived her of the chance to ever have her own children. At least she was alive and that was much to be thankful for because it could so easily have gone the other way.
‘Hello, Lizzie,’ Vera said as they approached the bed where Lizzie lay, pale-faced, her dark hair spread out against the white pillow. ‘How are you?’
Lizzie opened her eyes and they filled with tears as she looked at them. ‘I’ve been a bloody fool.’ Several tears spilled over and slid down the side of her face.
‘Yes, you have been, but you’ve also been lucky to survive.’ Frankie put her hand on her sister’s arm.
Lizzie grabbed hold of Frankie’s hand and squeezed it tight. ‘Thank you for coming to help me, and . . . I’m sorry I’ve been so horrible to you. You really didn’t deserve it.’
Frankie smiled at her. ‘Apology accepted. I hope we can perhaps be friends.’
‘What’ll happen to me? Will I have to leave the WAAF?’
‘Not if you don’t want to,’ Vera said. ‘You aren’t in the family way any more, so once you’re fit and well again you can come back and help man the balloon again.’
Lizzie smiled. ‘I love being in the WAAF, that’s why I did . . . ’ Her face crumpled, and she started to cry silently.
Frankie took both of her sister’s hands in hers. ‘What’s done is done, you need to look to the future now, you can’t change the past. Just focus on getting better and back to keeping that balloon up in the air.’
‘Time’s up, your sister needs to rest,’ the nurse said, coming back into the room. She smiled at them. ‘But you are welcome to come back tomorrow at proper visiting hours.’
‘Please do.’ Lizzie’s eyes met Frankie’s.
Frankie nodded. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow then.’
Chapter 41
‘You can get yourself dressed now, Mrs McCartney,’ Dr Stevenson said as he finished examining Winnie.
She propped herself up on her elbows on the examination couch. ‘Well am I, or aren’t I?’
Dr Stevenson glanced at her over his half-moon glasses. ‘All in good time, my dear. Get yourself dressed while I write up your notes.’
Winnie was about to argue with him, but he disappeared around the screen and left her to sort herself out. She was desperate to know if he’d found out that she was expecting a baby; she’d watched his face carefully for any clue as he examined her, but the man was a consummate professional and had given nothing away.
After dressing herself in double-quick time she sat down in the patients’ chair and waited for him to stop writing. The room was silent except for the ticking of a clock on the mantelpiece and the scratch of the nib of his fountain pen on paper.
‘Well, Mrs McCartney,’ Dr Stevenson eventually said, snapping his pen lid on and tucking it into his jacket pocket, ‘congratulations are in order, you most certainly are expecting a child.’ He glanced down at his notes. ‘And since you are unsure of the date of your last monthly cycle I have to go by when your husband was home on leave which makes the baby due some time during the first two weeks of June – I can’t be more precise than that at the moment.’
Winnie stared at him, completely lost for words for once, her stomach clenching so tightly she was frightened she was going to be sick. She put her hand over her mouth; she really didn’t want this to be happening right now. She didn’t want a baby, a voice inside her screamed.
‘Mrs McCartney, from the look on your face I would say that this is something of a surprise to you?’ He fixed her with his warm brown eyes. ‘You are a healthy young woman and there is no reason that I can see that you shouldn’t have a healthy child.’
‘We weren’t planning on having children until the war was over,’ Winnie said. ‘I don’t . . . ’
Dr Stevenson smiled. ‘Well, babies don’t always come along when planned. I’ll give you a letter so that you can sort out an expectant mother’s ration book for the extra food that you are now entitled to – the orange juice, cod liver oil, milk and vitamins – they’ll all help the baby to grow strong and healthy so do make sure that you take them. If you make an appointment with my secretary for a check-up in a few months’ time, I’ll see you then. In the meantime, if you have any concerns, don’t hesitate to come and see me.’
Dazed, Winnie walked out of his office and into the waiting room, where Bella stood up, her face anxious to know the outcome. She gave her friend a small nod before turning to Dr Stevenson’s secretary to make an appointment.
It wasn’t until they were outside in the street that she looked at Bella properly. ‘He said it’s due in the first two weeks of June.’ Tears stung her eyes. ‘But I don’t want it! Now’s not the right time and I don’t want what it’s going to do to me. I’m going to have to leave Station 75 because of it.’ Her tears spilt over and slid down her cheeks.
Bella took hold of both her hands and her kind brown eyes held Winnie’s. ‘I know this is a shock to you, but really it is the most marvellous thing.’ She smiled. ‘Just think, you and Mac are going to have a child, and I know he’d be thrilled about that, and you will be too once you’ve had a chance to get used to the idea.’
‘Will I?’ She sighed. ‘As soon as the boss knows about it, I’ll be out of a job. I was there at the start and I wanted to stay to the end, but now . . . ’
‘They’re the rules. It’s a tough job sometimes and not suited for expectant mothers.’
‘Rubbish, there’s no reason why I shouldn’t carry on for as long as I could manage . . . ’ Winnie paused, a thought blossoming in her mind. ‘I’m not going to tell the boss, not until I have to because I can’t hide it any more. If I am going to have a baby, then I’m not going to let it stop me doing what I love. No one else needs to know about this except you and Connie – she’ll need to know because of the extra rations I’ll get – but the boss doesn’t need to know, or anyone else at Station 75 – that way I can keep on working for as long as I can.’
Bella frowned. ‘You can’t do that, Winnie. What happens if you hurt yourself or the baby?’ She paused. ‘Or you put others in danger if you couldn’t do something?’
‘I’d never do that! I’ll be careful and if anything’s a bit tricky you can help me, we can get around this.’ She squeezed her friend’s hands. ‘Please, Bella, will you help me? Let me carry on as normal for as long as I can, please. At least if I still have my work it will help me keep going and gradually accept that I’m going to be a mother. If I have to give it all up, I don’t know what I’d do. I’d probably blame the baby and that wouldn’t help me grow to want it.’
‘You really feel that bad about it?’
Winnie nodded. ‘I feel like I’ve been invaded, something’s taken over my body that I don’t want . . . I’m scared. This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.’
‘All right then.’ Bella sighed. ‘I’ll go along with it, but only because I’m worried about you and that baby in there. I know how important working at Station 75 is to you. I’m not happy about you not telling the boss, but I’ll keep your secret and a close eye on you as well, but if you go doing anything daft which puts you or the baby in danger, then I will have to say something. Frankie needs to know as well, so she can help me cover for you if necessary.’
‘Very well, but only Frankie, I can trust her to keep a secret. Thank you, darling Bella, you are the best friend I’ve ever had, and I promise I won’t do anything silly, doing my job for as long as I can means so much to me.’ She blinked back tears. ‘I don’t know what else I’d do if I didn’t have my job to keep me going and busy while Mac’s out there somewhere. I know I’ll have to give it up before the baby’s born but a few months’ grace is all I’m asking for.’
Chapter 42
‘I think that’s enough turnips.’ Bella added ano
ther on to the pile that they’d already pulled up at the allotment, ready to take back to Station 75 for Mrs Connelly to cook for the crew’s midday meal. ‘There’s just the cabbage to get now.’
‘How many did she want?’ Frankie asked.
‘Only two today, she’s going to cook up the turnip tops as well as the roots, so we don’t need as much.’ They each cut one of the cabbages, which were looking good as they’d been careful to pick off any caterpillars before they’d a chance to munch their way through the leaves.
Frankie started to gather up the turnips, bunching the leaves in her hand like a bouquet and giving them a good shake to knock off the dried soil.
‘Wait,’ Bella said. ‘There’s something I need to tell you before we go back – it’s about Winnie.’
‘What’s the matter? I hope she ain’t done something that’s going to upset the boss.’
Bella smiled. ‘You could say that, she’s definitely breaking a rule this time, more like snapping it in two, actually.’
‘Go on, what’s she’s done?’
‘Winnie’s expecting a baby. She found out yesterday.’
Frankie stared at Bella for a moment, open-mouthed. ‘Bleedin’ heck!’ She sighed. ‘That’s it, she’ll have to leave then. I bet she’s not happy about that, she loves her job, but I suppose ’aving a baby will make up for that eventually.’
‘I’m not so sure. She’s not happy about it, she doesn’t want a baby right now and if she had to leave Station 75 because of it, well . . . ’ Bella sighed. ‘Our dear friend has decided that she’s just not going to tell the boss until she can’t hide it any more, so we’re going to have to help her, make sure she doesn’t do anything to endanger herself or the baby, no heavy lifting, that sort of thing. At least we can help her stay for a few more months.’
‘I’ll be glad to help her, but she’s goin’ to have a problem with her uniform – I tailored it to fit her slim figure, there ain’t much room for a growin’ baby in there.’ Frankie paused for a moment. ‘There’s no reason why I can’t alter larger-sized tunics to fit her as she gets bigger but even with doing that, there’ll be a limit to how long she can hide her condition from the boss.’
‘I know, but it’s what she wants to do and if we look out for her it will be all right. Station 75 wouldn’t be the same without Winnie, so let’s keep her here with us for as long as we can . . . ’ Bella smiled. ‘It’ll be lovely for Winnie to have her and Mac’s baby, I think she’ll make a good mother.’
‘At least she’s not goin’ to do what my sister did.’ Frankie sighed. ‘She was a fool and is lucky to still be here.’
‘How is she?’ Bella said as they started to walk back to Station 75 carrying the vegetables they’d picked.
‘All right. I went to see her yesterday and they’re going to send her out to a convalescent ’ospital in the countryside to recuperate when she’s ready. There shouldn’t be any reason why she can’t go back to the WAAF once she’s fit again.’
‘She must have felt desperate, and all because she wanted to stay in her job, like Winnie does,’ Bella said.
Frankie nodded. ‘Then we’ll just have to help Winnie stay for as long as she can. Let’s hope the boss is understanding when she does finally find out.’
‘Well, the worst Station Officer Steele can do is sack her. Whatever happens, Winnie will have to leave sooner or later.’ Bella shrugged. ‘Hopefully by then Winnie will be happier about having a baby, or perhaps the war will be over before her secret becomes too big to hide.’
Chapter 43
Frankie was pleased to see that Lizzie was sitting up in her hospital bed with a bit more colour in her cheeks than when she’d last been to visit her.
‘Hello, you’re looking better,’ Frankie said, pulling up a chair beside her sister’s bed. ‘I brought you these.’ She held out a paper bag of mint humbugs which she’d used some of her precious sweet ration to buy.
‘Thanks.’ Lizzie took them.
‘When are you moving out to the convalescent hospital?’
‘I’m going on Friday, as long as everything’s all right.’
‘That’s good. Has Vera been to see you?’
Lizzie nodded, visibly brightening. ‘Yes, her and some of the other girls from the balloon site. Sister had to tell them to keep the noise down, they’re a right noisy bunch sometimes. I can’t wait to get back to them.’
‘I know what you mean, I love being with my friends at Station 75.’ Frankie paused, wondering if she should again broach the subject of telling their mother what had happened. Their relationship was better than it was before Lizzie had had a backstreet abortion, but she still felt as if she were feeling her way with her sister, not sure of how she would take things. ‘Have you changed your mind about telling Mother? I’m sure she’d come and see you.’
Lizzie’s face went pale. ‘No, I’m not telling her, ever. She’d be so disappointed with me. Please don’t tell her.’
‘I won’t, I promise.’ Frankie didn’t know her mother well enough to know if what her sister said would be true; she suspected her mother would be worried about Lizzie, but it wasn’t her story to tell and since she’d been asked not to say anything then she would stick to that.
‘She wouldn’t understand, she never would have done such a thing.’ Lizzie frowned. ‘It’s best she never knows. I’ll go to the convalescent hospital, get better and then be back to work, that’s all I want to do.’ She opened the bag of humbugs and offered it to Frankie. ‘Do you want one?’
‘Thanks.’ Frankie took one and popped it in her mouth thinking that her mother might well have understood Lizzie’s predicament given the chance because she’d made a difficult choice of her own, leaving Frankie as a baby for her grandparents to bring up. Families were complicated things.
‘I love these, thanks for bringing them,’ Lizzie said, taking one for herself. ‘Your boss is kind. Will you thank her for what she did for me?’
‘Yes, of course, she’s been asking me about you. She’s a good boss. She can be strict, but I like working for her.’
The rest of the visiting time passed with the two of them talking about their work, Frankie telling Lizzie about life at Station 75 and the various characters who worked there, while her sister told her about the balloon team. By the time Frankie left, she felt they had found some common ground between them that didn’t just rely on them sharing the same mother. Their love of working at their different jobs as part of the war effort had drawn them a bit closer. There was still a long way to go, but it was a good start.
Chapter 44
As the train puffed into West Malling station, Bella was already waiting by the carriage door watching out for her first glimpse of Stefan, her stomach all aflutter at the thought of seeing him again. She’d seen him only last week when they’d gone to the pictures together in London, but it felt like an age since then and when he’d telephoned, inviting her to come and visit him here and see where he lived and worked, Bella had jumped at the chance.
He’d promised he’d be there to meet her, and there he was, looking so smart and handsome in his blue RAF uniform. Bella waved to him as her carriage slid past, gradually coming to a stop further along the platform. Stefan ran to her door and opened it.
‘Bella!’ He bowed, clicking his heels then holding out his hand to help her down, smiling warmly at her. ‘I so happy to see you.’
‘Hello, Stefan.’ Bella took his hand and moments later was wrapped in his warm embrace, enjoying the feeling of his arms around her and his lips on hers.
Several wolf whistles from soldiers standing by open windows on the stationary train made them laugh when they broke apart and, with his arm around her waist, Stefan led her out of the station.
‘Your carriage is ready.’ He bowed as he opened the door of an open-topped, bright red Morgan sports car, which was parked outside the station.
‘Thank you.’ Bella climbed into the low seat and he shut the door and went around to the
driver’s side. ‘Is this yours?’
‘No, I borrow from Tadeusz. You meet him later.’ Stefan handed her a silk scarf. ‘You wear this, Tadeusz keep it for women he give a ride to.’ He raised his eyebrows and grinned before starting the engine which roared into life.
Bella tied the scarf around her head and settled back in her leather seat as Stefan drove them out of the station and out into the Kent country lanes, the throaty purr of the engine and whistle of the wind making it impossible to hear properly so they didn’t talk, but often exchanged glances, Stefan holding on to her hand sometimes. She’d never been in such a fancy car before, one capable of going at a far greater speed than an Austin Seven, but she felt perfectly safe as Stefan drove expertly and not too fast.
She’d thought they’d be heading straight for RAF West Malling where he was stationed so was surprised when Stefan pulled over, parking beside a wood, the world suddenly feeling so quiet when he turned off the engine.
‘Come on, I want show you something.’ Stefan jumped out of the car and went around to open her door for her, holding out his hand for her to take.
Out of the car, Bella took the scarf off and shook her hair free, her dark brown curls springing into life. ‘What is it?’
‘You see.’ Stefan put his arm around her waist and led her into the wood where tall beech trees towered above them like a wild cathedral, the trunks a smooth grey while the burnt-orange leaves stood out against the clear blue sky. It was stunningly beautiful. ‘I hope you like.’
‘I love it, it’s breath-taking.’ She loved autumn and the way the trees put on one last show before winter. She’d written to him in her letters about her walks in the parks and how much she still missed being in the countryside where she’d grown up.
